Re: Questions for Temple Grandin

[Guest guest]

I would ask the same thing for all five minutes: " Would you PLEASE,

PLEASE come to my house and watch Allie and tell me what you think

of her abilities, current schedule, and future outlook? "

Debi

[Guest guest]

thank you pennie for you support and giving Kassiane and I credit to be of

able to answer the questions. I to not responded since not sure who it was

addressed to as the original poster and trying hard to remember to answer

only things addressed to me. So since then have deleted the questions.

I to remember one question about whales and such and the dolphins? my

thinking if you child like animals the animal itself is of much therapy for

many with ASD. I to be to have such a bond with my pets that I to not have

with people and my dog and I to seem to have our own language in ways

without words or sounds but something's that we can read each other

extremely well.

Sondra

[Guest guest]

Thankyou Sondra,

loves our animals. We have 2 cats and a dog. However when was

attacked by the neighbors dog last summer, it changed her affection for our

dog. still loves , it's just that doesn't sit and pet the

dog like she use to. We can see a resistance to the dog, from , and

has talked with her Counselor as well.

I guess my biggest concern right now is puberty. is soon to be 11 and

wears a bra. She is 5'0 " and weighs 108 pounds. She has never had any

seizures so I don't know what I am looking for, warning signs.

Also is in 4th grade, I am her Junior Girl Scout Leader, and she is in

Soccer as well. But still at school for recess she sits on the sidewalk and

plays with rocks. The teachers and she has tried to get to play with

others, and also had others invite into their group. But eventually,

like 3 minutes later, walks away and plays alone again. I have told

to ask other kids to play. I don't want to push but what else

can I do ?

Sorry for dumping this on you Sondra. I'm glad your here to advise me and

listen to us !

LeighAnn 's Mom

>

>Reply-To: Autism_in_Girls

>To: <Autism_in_Girls >

>Subject: Re: Questions for Temple Grandin

>Date: Sat, 20 Sep 2003 21:38:52 -0400

>

>thank you pennie for you support and giving Kassiane and I credit to be of

>able to answer the questions. I to not responded since not sure who it was

>addressed to as the original poster and trying hard to remember to answer

>only things addressed to me. So since then have deleted the questions.

>I to remember one question about whales and such and the dolphins? my

>thinking if you child like animals the animal itself is of much therapy for

>many with ASD. I to be to have such a bond with my pets that I to not have

>with people and my dog and I to seem to have our own language in ways

>without words or sounds but something's that we can read each other

>extremely well.

>Sondra

>

>

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[Guest guest]

I would ask Temple stuff she really KNOWS.

I'd ask her about anxiety.

I would ask her where she got her stimmy shirt from ASA.

And I would ask her for a copy of the plans for the squeeze machine.

Kassiane

< Re: Questions for Temple Grandin

If you had 5 minutes with Ms. Temple Grandin, what would you ask her ?

I would ask, 1) how can I help understand Puberty more easier .

We've

discussed it but she is terrified of blood to begin with. Not a good

start.

2) I've heard about seizures in puberty, what do I look for?

3) is a vacinee induced, and has had shingles 3 times. She has a

high

tollerance for pain, how can I get her to express to me more her

discomfort,

she is verbal.

4) What was high school like ? How challenging was college,

instructional as well as socially ?

5) has a love for Dolphins & Whales, and water therapy has been

great

for some people, have you tried it? Would you suggest it ?

Well I'm sure this would be much longer than 5 minutes. But these are

some

questions I have thought of since reading so many different books,

different

view points.

's Mom LeighAnn

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[Guest guest]

I know I am not Sondra, but...

Does prefer playing alone? Social interaction can be really

stressful, so I dont see any reason why she shouldn't be allowed to

pursue solitary activities at recess.

Kassiane the solo wonder

< Re: Questions for Temple Grandin

>Date: Sat, 20 Sep 2003 21:38:52 -0400

>

>thank you pennie for you support and giving Kassiane and I credit to be

of

>able to answer the questions. I to not responded since not sure who it

was

>addressed to as the original poster and trying hard to remember to

answer

>only things addressed to me. So since then have deleted the questions.

>I to remember one question about whales and such and the dolphins? my

>thinking if you child like animals the animal itself is of much therapy

for

>many with ASD. I to be to have such a bond with my pets that I to not

have

>with people and my dog and I to seem to have our own language in ways

>without words or sounds but something's that we can read each other

>extremely well.

>Sondra

>

>

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[Guest guest]

Kassiane-thought you said the squeeze machine wasent tight enough? <grin>

Pennie

Abby's Mom

[Guest guest]

I do have to agree with kassiane on this one, If she does soccer and girl

scout leader then this might just be to much for her. Perhaps this is her

downtime. Abby can only handle so much socialization. It is emotionally tireing

for

Abby and once she has done what she needs to do (reading class and such) then

she just needs to be alone and play. Its like a time that she regroups herself.

Pennie

Abby's Mom

[Guest guest]

LeighAnn, I am so glad that they are working with her and doing a play group.

It will help her so much

Pennie

Abby's Mom

[Guest guest]

Kassiane-as long as you have a traditional style oven for me to make pizza

rolls in, you can decorate your place any way that you would like

Pennie

Abby's Mom

[Guest guest]

i am fairly sure the squeeze machine that she originally built is in her book.

this is an explanation of the refined version, but it will cost a bomb to make.

p7

http://nsf-pad.bme.uconn.edu/2001/University%20of%20Massachusetts%20Amherst.pdf

i will stay with lying between 2 mattresses. cheaper and easier.

Re: Questions for Temple Grandin

Subject: Re: Questions for Temple Grandin

I would ask Temple stuff she really KNOWS.

I'd ask her about anxiety.

I would ask her where she got her stimmy shirt from ASA.

And I would ask her for a copy of the plans for the squeeze machine.

Kassiane

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[Guest guest]

leighann, To worry about seizures is not of worry as it is true it does

happen it is not something's to expect of you child will do as not all are

with seizures. I to have 4 on spectrum ( 3 officially dx and one in process)

only one of mine to have seizures and this is due to birth issues not from

autism. I to work with many , many kids with autism and only about 1/3 if

that to have the seizures and most often the seizures are partial or absent

.. Only 1 child with autism that I to personally know has the grandmal type

that started for hims at age 6 or 7. So maybe not for you to focus there too

much. If she to have one it may be to happen at most vulnerable times such

as a high fever or maybe stress times and or such. If she to have had normal

EEG up till now my guess would be to not worry for this, but that does not

mean she will not ever have them. I to be to know for me have what I term as

full complex jerking in my sleep that will wake me and this is not just once

but several in night so to me it could be of a seizure but have not had an

EEG so lack knowing but since it does not seem to impair my functioning I to

not worry about them, Sometimes I to get like a premonition that I feel

inside of self as though my body is about to have a convulsion or seizure

and it is very scary to me since never to experienced it but have no knowing

why my body has for many years to get that feeling.

About the dog yes one time events can leave permanent memory and fear of

things. It tends to wipe away all the good memory sad to say if we

experience one bad memory such as you daughter of being bit. To her she over

generalized that all dogs can be unpredictable and bite, even her beloved

dog is now an uncertain for her because in her thinking she visually saw a

dog bite and for this is now a new awareness about dogs to her , something

she might not have experienced and understood before so now she is aware and

overly cautious. If you dog is of gentle and never to have bited anyone

remind her how long you have had you dog and if she has any memory of this

dog (her dog) ever biting? If she to say no then go onto a information's

things of some dogs bite when they are afraid or being mistreated. Some dogs

never bite like out dog. So you can be safe with him as he has never bit and

is of gentle and misses you to pet hims had is maybe sad thinking you are

not happy with him anymore. I to always add the emotion so she can be aware

of what other people and or things might be to feel. If you to see her

petting the dog, reinforce it and let her know how happy the dog is and

feels because he loves it when she does this to him.

About play she is at age that is most begin of the isolations periods

because her interest in play is so much different than her peers,

developmentally they have past her up in the way they think and to play, so

even if she is included their thinking expressed are of foreign to her and

this leaves her to feel not connected, her want of play is too immature for

the other 4th graders to want to connect to her level for fear of social

rejections from the peers over all if they are seen doing this. So both try

for a time but it is not of working . What needs to be is to find a social

things that is of safe for both developmental ages. Also from my knowing we

are not as people who feel loneliness at the depths others to think we to

feel. It is not the same as the NT loneliness thinking or feelings . Often

times we are very content to sit and line up rocks, and to play by self as

this is like our only down time at school to be to enjoy what we like to do

is at recess. The job is of complex and hard to compete with you Childs need

for play to be less reinforcing than that of her peers. How do you compete

with this. You daughter will need to have enough successful exposures to so

cal real play among peers that leaves her wanting to do it again, she cannot

do this on her own, she needs support of the teachers and peers for this to

be of successful and if it can be met somewhat from her level and then moved

up the developmental ladder to closer to her peers levels. Most often this

can begin through a social therapy among peers her age and trained so to

speak by a trained professional to understand the gaps and need for you

child as individual goals. My own psychologist does this with over 150

children per week. Each group contains so many children in similar ages and

developmental interests. He teaches them to cue into their peers, to play in

joint efforts and does not allow one to slowly disconnect from the group if

he sees this he gets that child re engaged with the group. The group does

not mean all the children must be active in the same play, but he allows the

children's to choose another peer and they can pair off and find any play in

the room but both must be active in the play and hold conversations when he

observes this both are reinforced and explained to them why they are doing a

great job the children's love hims so much they all love to be to come to

hims groups. My own youngest children cry if they cannot come for being sick

or something's. Especially my 12 yo son who has a meltdown because he feels

so connected to children and others and the most settling things to my son

is that he is aware the children all are like him, he feels a safe and a

strong connect, because at school he has not found one with ASD so he feels

isolated and not as connected. He to be to even shared once he never wanted

to get married about 2 years ago. I to asked him why, He to say who will

want to marry a boy like me??? sad???? but now in group he has found many

girls like him with ASD and now he realizes that there are grils with ASD

too and now he is more settled within about long term and future. So why did

I to ramble my point is to find a safe outlet for you child to connect and a

place where SHE feels successful among peers so that the memory of connect

is more reinforcing than her inner play and her chances to increase the

attempts to play among others will increase too. Lastly if you can be to

invite a few safe girls from her school over and make it a much special

things for all the girls and as the girls are there explain the ASD in

milder ways and such but not let it be the focus of the visits but gradual

things so they can grasp and absorb it. The typical peers are not mature

enough and yet are at loss of not knowing of you daughter and to help them

bridge the gap is the only ways to help foster some understanding and

hopefully friendships.

Sondra

[Guest guest]

Kassiane,

plays alone because she has trouble asking kids to play with them, or

involving herself in the play. When she plays alone she watches the other

kids and gets depressed. The depression lasts several hours. Once home she

plays with neighborhood kids and the depression slowly lifts. And she is on

Zoloft, anti-depression medicine.

LeighAnn

>

>Reply-To: Autism_in_Girls

>To: <Autism_in_Girls >

>Subject: Re: Questions for Temple Grandin

>Date: Sat, 20 Sep 2003 21:16:15 -0700

>

>I know I am not Sondra, but...

>Does prefer playing alone? Social interaction can be really

>stressful, so I dont see any reason why she shouldn't be allowed to

>pursue solitary activities at recess.

>Kassiane the solo wonder

>

>

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[Guest guest]

Sondra,

Thankyou so much. I will not worry so much about the seizures. has the

flu right now and her fever has soared to 102.7, so hubby & I decided to

have her sleep with me lastnight, just to watch the fever. She's much better

this morning.

As for an EEG, has never had one.

Playing with others, exactly, is very immature compared to her piers

or even her 9yr old sister. In her IEP a few weeks ago, we asked for a play

group, which will be done by the school psychiatrist and therapists. They

are going to start with 4-5 girls they know need help socializing with

others and go from there.

I read your post to my husband and we both cried at your son's comment. So

glad he has found others with ASD. never talked about boys or marriage

then late this summer, she was walking around the block with her sisters.

And a boy asked to marry him. She walked home like a Peacock, struting

her stuff. She grabbed her hair brush and started brushing away. She has

taken good care of herself but it went full throttle with that boys

expression to her. It was something she needed to hear.

Thankyou for the advice. LeighAnn

's Mom

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[Guest guest]

This sounds so much like my Theresa, she plays with her friends here

in the neighborhood daily b/c she has had time to establish that

level of comfort, but in other social situations she just looks

miserably on and feels left out b/c she cannot insert herself into

conversation or group, even if she has practiced what to say, the

words and actions are stuck, as she says, and she feels helpless and

miserable. Then she comes home and screams and cries on her bed. She

was on zoloft too recently, but I stopped it days ago b/c she was

having huge daily panic-meltdowns over things that do not normally

trigger her and I wondered if the med (on it about 4 days) was

causing it. She had no meltdown the 3 days she's been off it, until

last night when she went to her friend's birthday party, and came

home without having eaten or joined in or spoken b/c it was too

overwhelming with extra girls there, and she just cried on her bed

for a long time and it turned to wild screaming b/c her sister was

still there having fun and she did not want to be left out. However

that would be a 'normal' trigger' for her, and I worried so much

about her going, but she (bravely) wanted to try it and I just hoped

for the best. I could not go with her to help b/c things I do or say

make her " stuck " too, like if I say the wrong thing in public that

might embarrass her etc. The p-doc calls this social anxiety, but to

me maybe there is an autistic type element to it, because she

develops so much physical tension and is so full of emotion but

cannot release it except by screaming and crying, it just seems more

intense, whereas I think social anxiety would be very frustrating,

but not so intense.

nancy grace

> Kassiane,

>

> plays alone because she has trouble asking kids to play with

them, or

> involving herself in the play. When she plays alone she watches the

other

> kids and gets depressed. The depression lasts several hours. Once

home she

> plays with neighborhood kids and the depression slowly lifts. And

she is on

> Zoloft, anti-depression medicine.

>

>

> LeighAnn

>

>

> >From: " Kassiane Yelbis " <MissAsparagus@m...>

> >Reply-To: Autism_in_Girls

> >To: <Autism_in_Girls >

> >Subject: Re: Questions for Temple Grandin

> >Date: Sat, 20 Sep 2003 21:16:15 -0700

> >

> >I know I am not Sondra, but...

> >Does prefer playing alone? Social interaction can be really

> >stressful, so I dont see any reason why she shouldn't be allowed to

> >pursue solitary activities at recess.

> >Kassiane the solo wonder

> >

> >

>

> _________________________________________________________________

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[Guest guest]

2 mattresses arent heavy enough =(

Granted, neither is a squeeze machine (I have tried it)..but it would be

SO COOL to have one in my living room...

Kassiane the ULTIMATE deep pressure seeker

< Re: Questions for Temple Grandin

I would ask Temple stuff she really KNOWS.

I'd ask her about anxiety.

I would ask her where she got her stimmy shirt from ASA.

And I would ask her for a copy of the plans for the squeeze machine.

Kassiane

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[Guest guest]

*grins* it isnt. But it would be such a cool peice of living room

furniture...along with hanging chairs and a rocking couch...

Kassiane who will have the STRANGEST decor when she grows up

< Re: Questions for Temple Grandin

Kassiane-thought you said the squeeze machine wasent tight enough?

Pennie

Abby's Mom

[Guest guest]

If she WANTS to play, maybe the teachers or playground monitors can be

enlisted to start up some structured games, so that it isn't as hard to

join and stay involved. I really hate the idea of asking the other girls

to " help " , because that sets up a helper-dependant relationship,

not a friend-friend relationship--but back in my day, it was the adult

on the playground's JOB to do stuff like that.

Kassiane

< Re: Questions for Temple Grandin

>Date: Sat, 20 Sep 2003 21:16:15 -0700

>

>I know I am not Sondra, but...

>Does prefer playing alone? Social interaction can be really

>stressful, so I dont see any reason why she shouldn't be allowed to

>pursue solitary activities at recess.

>Kassiane the solo wonder

>

>

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[Guest guest]

Oh but of course! I need my pizza roll fix too!

Oh, and on Abby and the trampoline...if she does start taking tumbling

and trampoline, that'll likely be a more " fun " way to get input, because

it ISNT " Ugh, I need input. AGAIN. " , it can be practicing skills (she

can't practice teh hard stuff on the mini tramp, which is a decidedly

GOOD THING, but she can work on shape jumps like I showed her, and then

it feels more like practice and less like DARN THIS BLEEPIN TRAMPOLINE " .

)

I have also found that my intense sensory hour and a half lowers my need

for a couple days, AND pumps up my endorphins so I am less depressed.

Good stuff, them endorphins...

Kassiane

< Re: Questions for Temple Grandin

Kassiane-as long as you have a traditional style oven for me to make

pizza

rolls in, you can decorate your place any way that you would like

Pennie

Abby's Mom

[Guest guest]

,

Has Theresa always had her " fits " . had those when she was very young,

till age 6 or so. went on Zoloft after her dog attack, she was

regressing in everything, so her p-doc said we could try ZOloft, and it has

helped immensly. She was on Zoloft, 50mg, for about 7 months then we tried

to slow down the dose and finally stop. Within that 3 week time, everyone

noticed bad changes in , crying all the time, withdrawing in

everything. So she went back to ZOloft, 25 mg, but at Girl Scout Camp this

summer she had a break down, so we put her back to 50mg and within 2 days

she was fine.

Now we only have to worry about clippers. uses them to clip the skin

on the bottom of her feet and palm side of her hand. If it's not one thing

it's another.

LeighAnn

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[Guest guest]

leighann much think it is of most important to always get the kids to

connect to the typical kids but in true sometimes I to think it is more

crucial for them to meet other kids on spectrum so they dont be to feel so

isolated inthe world but connect to others who can relate to how they think

and feel in life. But just like all peoples not all with ASD will connect

but when they do it is magical because they have a mutual bond of

understanding at a depths others have no clue about. Kassiane to express

most of her friends are on spectrum. most ofmy internet connections are with

those on the spectrum although I to also connect to some degrees tot he

parents of children's with ASD. It is because I to understand the way ASD

relates to me and many others. Although the higher they are in ability and

functioning the more lost I to be to feel with them because they teeter the

NT world and ASD world so closely that it is hard to understand the depths

of thems thinkings.

Sondra

[Guest guest]

kassiane I to didnot care for the squeeze machine because it does not

squeeze me in ways my body needs. Mattresses to me do not work as it is too

smothering. I to need weighted things that are 3/4 filled but that actually

mold to you body and then give the weights to where it is needed for me such

as my husband had a buckwheat pillow that is heavy but not as heavy as I to

like for it to be but it conforms to my body and molds to me so it is of

most calming effect I can be to establish. Weighted blankets are too stiff

they do not mold to you. I to not like any weights things past my knees but

prefer most to be on upper body of arms chest and such.

Sondra

[Guest guest]

kassiane that is of me too I to be have been wanting those patio swings that

looks like couch for me in my living room but the husband to say no. I to

also be to want the swinging chair but we do not own the place we to live in

so to adapt the ceiling to put the chair up is a no too. I to not like to

spin but gentle swings are of great comfort to me such as the two I to just

shared. Even if one could make an adult netted swing I would be of interest

to it since is can give firm hold while you swing.

Yet for me would much prefer whirl pool or swimming pool with direct sun

light to keep my body of warm, if I to be of slight chill will be of much

irritable.

Sondra

[Guest guest]

kassiane while what you share is true if not properly done is not of good

but if you work and foster it can lead to good friendships as I to have done

with the little girl I to work for at school. NT girls are not naturally

going to take the risk to interact with others who are of different but if

given the chance to understand the differences and to enhance the ability of

the ASD child to the NT girls it can foster solid friendships that no longer

need a facilitator to assist int he process. As I to share rare to have to

intervene for the ASD child anymore as she is doing well and so are the NT

girls but at start of each new years have to do this for a time until the NT

girls are feeling okay with the ASD Childs differences.

Sondra

[Guest guest]

Great questions Sondra!

Pennie

Abby's Mom

[Guest guest]

No problem Sondra, the whole group was concerned for you. Yes, your husband

did send me something back, he seems like a really nice guy. I would love to

come hear you speak in October, just not sure if I can. Can you send me the

information about it? Toledo is only about 1 hour to 1 1/2 hours away. Not far

at

all. How much is the conferance to?

Pennie

Abby's mom