Re: Re: Mom, NH, Lawsuit ( Laid to rest December 14 2004)

[Guest guest]

Hi Shirley

I live in Southern California in a little town called

Colton. It is inbetween San Bernardino and Riverside.

--- sml91452 wrote:

>

>

> Dena,

>

> What part of California do you live in? Shirley---

> In

> LBDcaregivers , Dena LEAVITT

> <d_j_leavitt@y...> wrote:

> >

> > Dear Shirley

> >

> > This is one of the most tragic story I have ever

> read.

> > It just sickens me. The uncaring ways of NH's. I

> am so

> > glad that they won't get away with it this time. I

> > realize that your Mom paid a high price, her life,

> but

> > just maybe this will get around and the horror

> will

> > stop. These types of law suits need to be

> published in

> > every newspaper around the country. I do not mean

> to

> > be insensitive to your mom's passing, but this

> whole

> > thing is so scary to me. I will soon be facing

> this

> > very thing with my mom. Where to place her. I live

> in

> > California also and will start my search soon. I

> cried

> > as I read about your dad's sorrow. I can only

> imagine

> > his pain and loneliness. You are a good daughter

> > Shirley to continue your care giving for your dad.

> I

> > know he appreciates you. God bless you both.

> >

> > Dena in CA

> >

> >

> >

> > --- sml91452 <shirley0914@h...> wrote:

> >

> > > Hi Group,

> > > A belated Merry Christmas and best wishes for a

> > > Happy New Year.

> > > I joined this group in January of 2002, My Mom

> was

> > > diaganosed with

> > > Lewy Body Disease at

> > > that time.

> > > My Dad was careing for Mom at home. She was

> > > sometimes incontinent and

> > > her head was slowly

> > > going into a downward position. She could only

> raise

> > > it up for short

> > > periods of time.She was in

> > > pain most of the time because of her neck. She

> could

> > > walk but was

> > > unsteady and would walk in a

> > > somewhat slanted position at times. Her mind was

> > > very good, she had

> > > all of her mental facilities

> > > and was very optomistic as far as getting better

> and

> > > beating this

> > > thing, She looked forward

> > > to the day she could drive her car again and

> clean

> > > her house. This

> > > optomisim never changed

> > > throughout her whole ordeal.

> > > As I remember she started taking resperidol and

> > > started having

> > > hallucinations. Eventually she

> > > started taking Seroquel which helped some. She

> was

> > > awake most of the

> > > time constantly trying

> > > to find a comfortable position. He had to help

> her

> > > adjust her pillows

> > > at least 20 times a night.

> > >

> > > Dad had prostrate surgery and Mom came to stay

> with

> > > my family for a

> > > week. When she got

> > > home she fell several hours later, this was on

> > > September 13 of 2002.

> > > She broke her hip and was

> > > placed in a Nursing Home for rehabilitation for

> 3

> > > weeks. She wasn't

> > > able to walk when she was

> > > signed out but the NH would not keep her longer

> > > because of insurance

> > > matters.She belonged to

> > > a well known HMO.

> > >

> > > With Dad still recovering from his surgery we

> > > decided the best plase

> > > for Mom was at my home.

> > > I was married and have four teenagers so there

> was

> > > plenty of us

> > > around to help. It was the most

> > > gureling time of my life. I cared for Mom for 3

> > > months never getting

> > > more than about 3 hours sleep

> > > a night. I was also doing in home daycare caring

> fro

> > > 6-8 toddlers.

> > >

> > > We all agreed as well as Mom that we should

> place

> > > her in a NH until

> > > she was able to walk again.

> > > The NH was basically across the road from my

> house

> > > so we were able to

> > > visit daily. Dad also

> > > visited on a daily basis. She was in this home

> for 8

> > > months, They

> > > gave her phisical therapy but

> > > gave up after a few months. I was constantly

> > > monitering her care and

> > > had numberous meetings

> > > with the staff and Ombudsman which resulted in 2

> > > people getting fired

> > > and retraining of the staff

> > > to be more compassive with their patients. They

> > > would complain about

> > > changeing her so often

> > > and she ended up always having UTI's. She

> started

> > > going home for

> > > weekend visits and eventually

> > > checked herself out, she refused to go back.

> > > Shortly about a month or two later she taught

> > > herself how to walk

> > > again at home. I would go over

> > > and help out as much as I could with buying

> > > groceries, cleaning house

> > > and basically givieng Dad

> > > a break.

> > > Dad was becomming increasingly exhausted. At the

> > > time Mom was 76 and

> > > Dad was 77. They

> > > both still had a young outlook on life and Mom

> > > always matained that

> > > she would get better and

> > > drive again. Her eyesight steadly became worse

> where

> > > sometimes she

> > > could see clearly and

> > > sometimes hardly at all. Dad had to cook, clean,

> > > feed, change

> > > diapers,and was lucky to get

> > > 3 hours sleep a night. Sometimes Mom would sleep

> for

> > > an hour or two

> > > sometimes not at all.

> > > If we could have afforded at home care things

> would

> > > have been so much

> > > better, but the state

> > > refused to pay for it and would rather pay over

> > > $4000 a month in

> > > Nursing Home care.

> > >

> > > Finally in July of 2004 we had to again put Mom

> into

> > > a nursing

> > > facility. Dad was slowing down

> > > so much he just could not care for her any

> longer.

> > > She suffered a

> > > couple of more falls and just

> > > needed too much care for one man to handle.

> > > When we put Mom into this nursing home we

> thought we

> > > found a great

> > > place. It was very clean

> > > and well staffed and had a good reputation. Mom

> > > agreed that Dad

> > > needed a break. By that time

> > > I was in the middle of a Divorce and was

> planning on

> > > taking Mom and

> > > Dad with me from Calif to

> > > Houston.so that I could help Dad in careing for

> her

> > > and take some of

> > > the burden off of him.

> > >

>

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