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Re: wig came off

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lol,thats so funny!

- In AutismBehaviorProblems , pkuenstler@... wrote:

>

> Yes, the wig came off and Karac went through a period of time

checking to

> see if anyone else's hair would come off. LOL, Pat K

>

>

> In a message dated 10/5/2008 9:10:09 P.M. Central Daylight Time,

> hawkie6@... writes:

>

>

>

>

> OMG Pat! You are kidding? The wig came off? Now, that should of

been on

> tape.

> Stacie

>

>

> In a message dated 10/4/2008 6:24:23 A.M. Pacific Daylight Time,

> pkuenstler@... a messag

>

>

>

>

> , I enjoyed what you had to say about Moms of special needs

kids

> needing to take of themselves; that is so true.

> Your statement about your child pulling the hair out of the head of

his

> babysitter reminded me of a phase Karac went through.

>

> Karac doesn't like for anyone to speak to him in a rough tone of

voice. One

> day the woman aide on the school bus spoke to him in an angry tone

of voice,

> and he reached up and pulled her hair. It came off because it was

a wig.

> For awhile after that Karac went through a stage of pulling other

peoples hair

> to see if it would come off too. LOL, Pat K

>

>

> In a message dated 10/4/2008 8:10:03 A.M. Central Daylight Time,

> walkman975@... a messag

>

>

>

>

> The truth is that NO ONE will ever understand how you feel when

your child

> has an off the chart behavior other than another parent who is in

the same

> boat. NO ONE. Not your mother, sister, BFF (unless she has a child

like yours),

> your priest, minister or rabbi, psychologist, speech therapist,

teacher,

> babysitter etc.

>

> No one can possibly understand the intense pain that you feel when

your

> child smacks you, pulls the hair out of the head of his

babysitter, freaks out at

> the supermarket, or whatever. So don't expect to get a lot of

support from

> them. They just do not get it and can't. They may feel bad for

you, but that

> isn't going to help you.

>

> Many dads run away from things like this-some physically leave

(like mine)

> and others emotionally leave. Of course there are some wonderful

dads out

> there-so if you are one of them, I applaud you. Lucky for me, I

have a great

> step-dad in the picture who by being a little removed from it, is

a great help

> to me. I can't take my son out by myself very often (he goes out

with a big

> strong fellow 4 times a week for fun activities), so on the

weekends, my

> husband comes with me. We used to travel a great deal with my son

(he's been to

> England, Scotland, the Bahamas, etc). But he is too difficult for

that now, and

> it is a great sadness for me to realize that.

>

> So, I am learning that I must take care of myself. The stress that

we are

> exposed to can age us rapidly. Studies have been done on stress

and guess who

> they have used as the subjects? Moms of children with autism,

because they

> found that we are the most stressed out group around. Scary!! Your

kids need you

> healthy and around a long time. Take care of yourself.

>

> Because I do workshops on this subject, I have talked to so many

moms. I

> have found that caretakers of people with illness or special needs

become

> martyrs. The reason for this is that we become so conditioned to

always put someone

> else's needs before our own that very quickly we forget about our

own needs.

> We feel really guilty to do something nice for ourselves. Think

about it. Do

> you feel a tinge of guilt if you say (or even think) about doing

something

> fun like going out to lunch with your friend, a movie (that you

want to see)

> with your husband, spending money on yourself? If I am honest, I

have to say

> that I always feel that tinge of guilt and have to force myself to

get beyond

> it. I herniated a disk in my back and it took me almost a year to

deal with

> it. (Now I go to a physical therapist who specializes in Pilates

therapy. It's

> like having my own personal trainer).

>

> In my community, moms with kids in the spectrum are starting to

get together

> and do things on occasion by ourselves. Last week, one

organization held a

> movie party. Of course the movie was about autism, but it was fun

to drink

> coffee and talk with other moms in the middle of the day.

>

> We all need to concentrate on ourselves and make at least one

activity a

> week that is just for us alone.

>

> Herskowitz

> valerieherskowitz.val

>

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