Re: Not just my kid-banned

[Guest guest]

In my humble (yet studied opinion), this is undeniably why the majority of Autistic individuals were placed in institutions. Autism has always been here...it was lumped with MR, and thought to be the most extreme of MR...hence many born, say in the 40,50, 60s, were placed in another's care. There has always been a stigma associated with Autism, they just didn't know what to call it.

WE know more now, and my hope again is that this is changing. I know it is. This is why we all need to be fighting for ABA coverage...because it is what works for 95% of these kids. We need it covered by insurance, and we need it yesterday!!!!!!!! We need more of us, "fighting" back at people like Denis Leary and Micheal Savage. We are their voice, we have some awareness now, let's all take advantage of that and keep "pushing back" until our kids have what they need to be productive citizens. If they need Aids in school to better assist-- we keep fighting, if they need a private school and the parent can't afford it, we vote someone in office who believes in vouchers, if we start teaching the least of these powers we'll be stronger too...so get some Autism Cards and educate people, whatever we need it is sadly up to us to speak out. Speak out now...speak out with your vote,

speak out...do it kindly, but do it.

Speaking out today, tomorrow and the next,

NOW is the time...

e

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------To: AutismBehaviorProblems Sent: Friday, October 31, 2008 2:58:07 AMSubject: Not just my kid-banned

Tonite was our small town church October party. My 10yr daughter{pdd} went with friends and enjoyed herself,enjoyed face paint and treats. and friendship. My 10yr son with low functioning autism was home. He was banned from being in places,like church programs. It's not just my son. Other families,children are going through this. I ran accross. This news report,decided to share it.

Fargo, N.D. (AP) When a 13-year-old Minnesota boy was banned from. Church after parishioners complained about his behavior, it exposed a. Painful truth so politically incorrect that some people feel guilty.

[Guest guest]

I agree, that is another way to humbly speak out...to show that we are aware, and that we know when and where to put our kids. will not be in a library soon...does he have a right to be, of course, is it fair to others, absolutely NOT. I'm all for balance.

e...

To: AutismBehaviorProblems Sent: Friday, October 31, 2008 5:50:10 AMSubject: Re: Not just my kid-banned

as a mother of 15 girl old girl with autism, who can have meltdowns

in public, i can see both sides. there are certain situations i would

not put my child in if possible, or that i would leave if she became

disruptive, such as church (although i am not religious) or a play or

the library. however, in public environments that are not expected to

be very quiet, like the supermarket, mall or other general places,

unless the child is abusive, they should not be expected to leave.

screaming is not dangerous. it may be annoying, but it does not hurt

anyone. unless someone is actually in danger, i think people need to

be more tolerant.

Tonite was our small town church October party. My 10yr daughter{pdd} went with friends and enjoyed herself,enjoyed face paint and treats and friendship. My 10yr son with low functioning autism was home. He was banned from being in places,like church programs. Its not just my son. Other families,children are going through this. I ran accross this news report,decided to share it.FARGO, N.D. (AP) When a 13-year-old Minnesota boy was banned from church after parishioners complained about his behavior, it exposed a painful truth so politically incorrect that some people feel guilty just saying it out loud: Some autistic children can be annoying and disruptive in public.The case of Adam Race and others like him has laid bare conflicted feelings — among both parents of these children and other people — over autistic youngsters in public places.. And it has stirred debate over how much

consideration one side owes the other.In the case of Adam Race, a judge agreed with a priest in Bertha, Minn., who said the 225-pound teenager was disruptive and dangerous, and upheld a restraining order barring him from services. The priest said Adam spit, wet his pants, made loud noises and nearly ran over people while bolting from the church after services.Carol Race, Adam's mother, said the congregation' s claims were exaggerated. But in a letter to the Star Tribune of Minneapolis, JoAnn Brinda of Crystal, Minn., said the Race family should have shown more consideration for others."I don't understand why families that have a challenged child who becomes loud and abusive remain at a service where all participants are quiet and contemplative most of the time," Brinda wrote. Duclos of Peoria, Ariz., who writes the conservative Wake Up America blog, called the Race story a "horrible situation

all around.""I have known a few people over my lifetime who have had to deal with autism with their children," Duclos said. "It's as frustrating for them as it is for the public.Similar cases involving people with autism have played out in public recently. A California man was kicked out of a health club for screaming. A North Carolina boy was taken off a plane before takeoff after having a meltdown. A South Carolina girl was ordered out of a restaurant by the town's police chief for crying.Syndicated radio talk show host Savage added to the furor last month when he charged that doctors and drug companies are overdiagnosing autism, and said, "I'll tell you what autism is: In 99 percent of the cases, it's a brat who hasn't been told to cut the act out." Several major companies pulled their advertising from Savage's show. Jo Rudy, who is the mother of an autistic child and writes and

consults on autism, said Savage's words were "truly nasty and hurtful." At the same time, Rudy said the talk show host has raised awareness of some of the frustrations of parents of autistic children and the wider public, too. Rudy said there are times when parents should not put their children in situations where they may be disruptive. "Some of these stories really are the ones where the general public can absolutely identify with the other side of the story," Rudy said. Goldtrap of Davenport, Fla., said too many people diagnosed with autism are out and about in public because of political correctness. Goldtrap, 40, has two nephews, ages 3 and 21, with autism, and said the older one has become so violent at times that the police have been called."I certainly sympathize with all the families who are in this situation," Goldtrap said. "But when we got away from the concept of

institutionalizatio n in America, we lost an important element of trying to maintain civility. There is a place for mental institutions. "Goldtrap added: "If it were up to me, he would be in an institution. My brother doesn't agree, and that's his prerogative. " He declined to identify his brother, saying, "I don't want to start another argument."Autism is a mental disorder that inhibits a person's ability to communicate and can include a host of complications. It varies widely in its severity. Some people are well-behaved; others are prone to outbursts or self-abusive behavior such as biting or head-banging.A recent study by the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention estimates that one out of every 150 U.S. children over the age of 8 is autistic or suffers from a related disorder. About 560,000 Americans under 21 are believed to have autism.Many parents say that their autistic children

are largely misunderstood, that they can't help it when they act up, and that they need interaction with the public.Barbara Coppo, whose 30-year-old son, Kenny, was banned from a Vallejo, Calif., health club for screaming, said Americans need to learn about living with autistic children."Autism may frighten people because so little is known about the disorder," said Coppo, who wrote a book about her son. "The cause has not been scientifically proven and the victims often act in ways society doesn't understand."However, some parents wonder how much understanding can be gained in grocery stores, churches or other public places.Nikki Wilmoth- of Rockport, Texas, said certain high-traffic areas are off-limits for her autistic 14-year-old son, Zach"I'm an advocate for my child, but we all have to play on the same playground," she said. "It's not about clearing the playground so my child

can be on it."Wilmoth- recalled one day after Sunday school class, when Zach licked several trays full of Oreo cookies set out for students. He was asked to find a different class."We're talking 50 to 60 Oreos. He didn't understand the effect it had on the entire class," Wilmoth- said. "I had to make amends. I had to volunteer."Rudy advises parents of autistic children to arrange forays out in public with care, which may mean five minutes in the grocery store instead of 45 minutes."Certainly there are cranky people in this world. If a mother glares at your child for something that's really pretty harmless, quite honestly that's her problem," Rudy said. "But if your child is going to have a meltdown, I don't think it's in anybody's best interest to bring the child along."Joe Schmitt, a Minneapolis lawyer who has often defended employers against claims they discriminated

against disabled employees, said people who object to certain accommodations may be viewed as insensitive to those with autism or other disabilities."They usually really do care, but they have to weigh the considerations of others," Schmitt said.Schmitt said church officials in Minnesota knew they would be criticized for banning Adam, but took action after the two sides failed to arrive at a compromise."I'm not saying they were right," Schmitt said of the church. "But I would disagree with anybody who thinks they did that casually or it wasn't important to them."Sandy Boyles, whose 18-year-old son, Walter, is autistic, said that when she began attending First Reformed Church in New Brunswick, N.J., she didn't bring him along, because in other churches he would run up and down the aisles screeching"She was afraid of being ostracized. I told her, 'So what? Bring him anyway,'" the Rev.

Kramer-Mills said.Eventually, the small congregation revised its services to Walter's liking. Worship used to start softly and build to a crescendo. Now, it starts with more noise."I have to be careful because sometimes he'll do a fast movement or run," Boyles said. "But the other members aren't as scared as I am."Report By APSubmitted By Associated Press ...

Plan your next getaway with AOL Travel. Check out Today's Hot 5 Travel Deals!

[Guest guest]

I agree! is welcomed at church and everyone that knows us helps out! He goes into kids world while we go to service and they are all aware! Even though he is 5 we have him in the 2-3 year old room because it is more appropriate for him. Now I will take shopping with me if I have to and some family parties! But the library, movies, weddings etc we try to find a sitter! We do take him out to eat but we usually have to get up and go right when we are done or hurry up and finish because he will only sit for so long! We also still have to have him in a high chair in restaurants too because he will not stay in his seat otherwise.StacieSent via BlackBerry by AT&TFrom: DantSolo@...Date: Fri, 31 Oct 2008 06:50:10 EDTTo: <AutismBehaviorProblems >Subject: Re: Not just my kid-banned as a mother of 15 girl old girl with autism, who can have meltdowns in public, i can see both sides. there are certain situations i would not put my child in if possible, or that i would leave if she became disruptive, such as church (although i am not religious) or a play or the library. however, in public environments that are not expected to be very quiet, like the supermarket, mall or other general places, unless the child is abusive, they should not be expected to leave. screaming is not dangerous. it may be annoying, but it does not hurt anyone. unless someone is actually in danger, i think people need to be more tolerant. Tonite was our small town church October party. My 10yr daughter{pdd} went with friends and enjoyed herself,enjoyed face paint and treats and friendship. My 10yr son with low functioning autism was home. He was banned from being in places,like church programs. Its not just my son. Other families,children are going through this. I ran accross this news report,decided to share it.FARGO, N.D. (AP) When a 13-year-old Minnesota boy was banned from church after parishioners complained about his behavior, it exposed a painful truth so politically incorrect that some people feel guilty just saying it out loud: Some autistic children can be annoying and disruptive in public.The case of Adam Race and others like him has laid bare conflicted feelings — among both parents of these children and other people — over autistic youngsters in public places. And it has stirred debate over how much consideration one side owes the other.In the case of Adam Race, a judge agreed with a priest in Bertha, Minn., who said the 225-pound teenager was disruptive and dangerous, and upheld a restraining order barring him from services. The priest said Adam spit, wet his pants, made loud noises and nearly ran over people while bolting from the church after services.Carol Race, Adam's mother, said the congregation's claims were exaggerated. But in a letter to the Star Tribune of Minneapolis, JoAnn Brinda of Crystal, Minn., said the Race family should have shown more consideration for others."I don't understand why families that have a challenged child who becomes loud and abusive remain at a service where all participants are quiet and contemplative most of the time," Brinda wrote. Duclos of Peoria, Ariz., who writes the conservative Wake Up America blog, called the Race story a "horrible situation all around.""I have known a few people over my lifetime who have had to deal with autism with their children," Duclos said. "It's as frustrating for them as it is for the public.Similar cases involving people with autism have played out in public recently. A California man was kicked out of a health club for screaming. A North Carolina boy was taken off a plane before takeoff after having a meltdown. A South Carolina girl was ordered out of a restaurant by the town's police chief for crying.Syndicated radio talk show host Savage added to the furor last month when he charged that doctors and drug companies are overdiagnosing autism, and said, "I'll tell you what autism is: In 99 percent of the cases, it's a brat who hasn't been told to cut the act out." Several major companies pulled their advertising from Savage's show. Jo Rudy, who is the mother of an autistic child and writes and consults on autism, said Savage's words were "truly nasty and hurtful." At the same time, Rudy said the talk show host has raised awareness of some of the frustrations of parents of autistic children and the wider public, too. Rudy said there are times when parents should not put their children in situations where they may be disruptive. "Some of these stories really are the ones where the general public can absolutely identify with the other side of the story," Rudy said. Goldtrap of Davenport, Fla., said too many people diagnosed with autism are out and about in public because of political correctness. Goldtrap, 40, has two nephews, ages 3 and 21, with autism, and said the older one has become so violent at times that the police have been called."I certainly sympathize with all the families who are in this situation," Goldtrap said. "But when we got away from the concept of institutionalization in America, we lost an important element of trying to maintain civility. There is a place for mental institutions."Goldtrap added: "If it were up to me, he would be in an institution. My brother doesn't agree, and that's his prerogative." He declined to identify his brother, saying, "I don't want to start another argument."Autism is a mental disorder that inhibits a person's ability to communicate and can include a host of complications. It varies widely in its severity. Some people are well-behaved; others are prone to outbursts or self-abusive behavior such as biting or head-banging.A recent study by the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention estimates that one out of every 150 U.S. children over the age of 8 is autistic or suffers from a related disorder. About 560,000 Americans under 21 are believed to have autism.Many parents say that their autistic children are largely misunderstood, that they can't help it when they act up, and that they need interaction with the public.Barbara Coppo, whose 30-year-old son, Kenny, was banned from a Vallejo, Calif., health club for screaming, said Americans need to learn about living with autistic children."Autism may frighten people because so little is known about the disorder," said Coppo, who wrote a book about her son. "The cause has not been scientifically proven and the victims often act in ways society doesn't understand."However, some parents wonder how much understanding can be gained in grocery stores, churches or other public places.Nikki Wilmoth- of Rockport, Texas, said certain high-traffic areas are off-limits for her autistic 14-year-old son, Zach"I'm an advocate for my child, but we all have to play on the same playground," she said. "It's not about clearing the playground so my child can be on it."Wilmoth- recalled one day after Sunday school class, when Zach licked several trays full of Oreo cookies set out for students. He was asked to find a different class."We're talking 50 to 60 Oreos. He didn't understand the effect it had on the entire class," Wilmoth- said. "I had to make amends. I had to volunteer."Rudy advises parents of autistic children to arrange forays out in public with care, which may mean five minutes in the grocery store instead of 45 minutes."Certainly there are cranky people in this world. If a mother glares at your child for something that's really pretty harmless, quite honestly that's her problem," Rudy said. "But if your child is going to have a meltdown, I don't think it's in anybody's best interest to bring the child along."Joe Schmitt, a Minneapolis lawyer who has often defended employers against claims they discriminated against disabled employees, said people who object to certain accommodations may be viewed as insensitive to those with autism or other disabilities."They usually really do care, but they have to weigh the considerations of others," Schmitt said.Schmitt said church officials in Minnesota knew they would be criticized for banning Adam, but took action after the two sides failed to arrive at a compromise."I'm not saying they were right," Schmitt said of the church. "But I would disagree with anybody who thinks they did that casually or it wasn't important to them."Sandy Boyles, whose 18-year-old son, Walter, is autistic, said that when she began attending First Reformed Church in New Brunswick, N.J., she didn't bring him along, because in other churches he would run up and down the aisles screeching"She was afraid of being ostracized. I told her, 'So what? Bring him anyway,'" the Rev. Kramer-Mills said.Eventually, the small congregation revised its services to Walter's liking. Worship used to start softly and build to a crescendo. Now, it starts with more noise."I have to be careful because sometimes he'll do a fast movement or run," Boyles said. "But the other members aren't as scared as I am."Report By APSubmitted By Associated Press ... Plan your next getaway with AOL Travel. Check out Today's Hot 5 Travel Deals!

[Guest guest]

Hi Stacie,good for ! My son had actually gone to church and

shopping,lirary and scouts ect. his whole life. Nobody in public lost

patience with him until he regressed. Once he regressed he was banned

and everyone blames my bad parenting for his new,lower behaviors. Its

because they don't understand regression in autism. When I try to

explain they word me off,they must think I'm full of..crazy or

whatever,lol. They have said " We know Artanian " , " He wasn't this

way " , " like this " ect. They think regression is MY EXCUSE. They just

don't know autism. He was well socialized his whole life. Regression

changed his whole life.

I wish people knew more about autism.

Best wishes,

Tishanne

- In AutismBehaviorProblems ,

" stacie " wrote:

>

> I agree! is welcomed at church and everyone that knows us

helps out! He goes into kids world while we go to service and they

are all aware! Even though he is 5 we have him in the 2-3 year old

room because it is more appropriate for him. Now I will take

shopping with me if I have to and some family parties! But the

library, movies, weddings etc we try to find a sitter! We do take

him out to eat but we usually have to get up and go right when we

are done or hurry up and finish because he will only sit for so

long! We also still have to have him in a high chair in restaurants

too because he will not stay in his seat otherwise.

> Stacie

> Sent via BlackBerry by AT & T

>

> Re: Not just my kid-banned

>

>

>

>

>

>

> as a mother of 15 girl old girl with autism, who can have

meltdowns

> in public, i can see both sides. there are certain situations i

would

> not put my child in if possible, or that i would leave if she

became

> disruptive, such as church (although i am not religious) or a

play or

> the library. however, in public environments that are not

expected to

> be very quiet, like the supermarket, mall or other general

places,

> unless the child is abusive, they should not be expected to leave.

> screaming is not dangerous. it may be annoying, but it does not

hurt

> anyone. unless someone is actually in danger, i think people

need to

> be more tolerant.

>

> In a message dated 10/31/2008 3:58:35 A.M. Eastern Daylight Time,

> tishannepatterson@... writes:

>

>

>

>

> Tonite was our small town church October party. My 10yr

daughter{pdd}

> went with friends and enjoyed herself,enjoyed face paint and

treats

> and friendship. My 10yr son with low functioning autism was home.

He

> was banned from being in places,like church programs. Its not

just my

> son. Other families,children are going through this. I ran

accross

> this news report,decided to share it.

>

> FARGO, N.D. (AP) When a 13-year-old Minnesota boy was banned from

> church after parishioners complained about his behavior, it

exposed a

> painful truth so politically incorrect that some people feel

guilty

> just saying it out loud: Some autistic children can be annoying

and

> disruptive in public.

> The case of Adam Race and others like him has laid bare

conflicted

> feelings †" among both parents of these children and other

people †"

> over autistic youngsters in public places. And it has stirred

debate

> over how much consideration one side owes the other.

> In the case of Adam Race, a judge agreed with a priest in Bertha,

> Minn., who said the 225-pound teenager was disruptive and

dangerous,

> and upheld a restraining order barring him from services. The

priest

> said Adam spit, wet his pants, made loud noises and nearly ran

over

> people while bolting from the church after services.

> Carol Race, Adam's mother, said the congregation'Carol Race, Ad

> exaggerated. But in a letter to the Star Tribune of Minneapolis,

> JoAnn Brinda of Crystal, Minn., said the Race family should have

> shown more consideration for others.

> " I don't understand why families that have a challenged child who

> becomes loud and abusive remain at a service where all

participants

> are quiet and contemplative most of the time, " Brinda wrote.

> Duclos of Peoria, Ariz., who writes the conservative Wake

Up

> America blog, called the Race story a " horrible situation all

around. "

> " I have known a few people over my lifetime who have had to deal

with

> autism with their children, " Duclos said. " It's as frustrating

for

> them as it is for the public.

> Similar cases involving people with autism have played out in

public

> recently. A California man was kicked out of a health club for

> screaming. A North Carolina boy was taken off a plane before

takeoff

> after having a meltdown. A South Carolina girl was ordered out of

a

> restaurant by the town's police chief for crying.

> Syndicated radio talk show host Savage added to the furor

> last month when he charged that doctors and drug companies are

> overdiagnosing autism, and said, " I'll tell you what autism is:

In 99

> percent of the cases, it's a brat who hasn't been told to cut the

act

> out. " Several major companies pulled their advertising from

Savage's

> show.

> Jo Rudy, who is the mother of an autistic child and writes

and

> consults on autism, said Savage's words were " truly nasty and

> hurtful. " At the same time, Rudy said the talk show host has

raised

> awareness of some of the frustrations of parents of autistic

children

> and the wider public, too.

> Rudy said there are times when parents should not put their

children

> in situations where they may be disruptive. " Some of these

stories

> really are the ones where the general public can absolutely

identify

> with the other side of the story, " Rudy said.

> Goldtrap of Davenport, Fla., said too many people diagnosed

> with autism are out and about in public because of political

> correctness. Goldtrap, 40, has two nephews, ages 3 and 21, with

> autism, and said the older one has become so violent at times

that

> the police have been called.

> " I certainly sympathize with all the families who are in this

> situation, " Goldtrap said. " But when we got away from the concept

of

> institutionalizatioinstitutionalizatio<WBR>n in America, we lost

> trying to maintain civility. There is a place for mental

> institutions.i

> Goldtrap added: " If it were up to me, he would be in an

institution.

> My brother doesn't agree, and that's his prerogative.My brother

doesn'

> identify his brother, saying, " I don't want to start another

> argument. "

> Autism is a mental disorder that inhibits a person's ability to

> communicate and can include a host of complications. It varies

widely

> in its severity. Some people are well-behaved; others are prone

to

> outbursts or self-abusive behavior such as biting or head-banging.

> A recent study by the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention

> estimates that one out of every 150 U.S. children over the age of

8

> is autistic or suffers from a related disorder. About 560,000

> Americans under 21 are believed to have autism.

> Many parents say that their autistic children are largely

> misunderstood, that they can't help it when they act up, and that

> they need interaction with the public.

> Barbara Coppo, whose 30-year-old son, Kenny, was banned from a

> Vallejo, Calif., health club for screaming, said Americans need

to

> learn about living with autistic children.

> " Autism may frighten people because so little is known about the

> disorder, " said Coppo, who wrote a book about her son. " The cause

has

> not been scientifically proven and the victims often act in ways

> society doesn't understand. "

> However, some parents wonder how much understanding can be gained

in

> grocery stores, churches or other public places.

> Nikki Wilmoth- of Rockport, Texas, said certain high-

traffic

> areas are off-limits for her autistic 14-year-old son, Zach

> " I'm an advocate for my child, but we all have to play on the

same

> playground, " she said. " It's not about clearing the playground so

my

> child can be on it. "

> Wilmoth- recalled one day after Sunday school class, when

> Zach licked several trays full of Oreo cookies set out for

students.

> He was asked to find a different class.

> " We're talking 50 to 60 Oreos. He didn't understand the effect it

had

> on the entire class, " Wilmoth- said. " I had to make

amends. I

> had to volunteer. "

> Rudy advises parents of autistic children to arrange forays out

in

> public with care, which may mean five minutes in the grocery

store

> instead of 45 minutes.

> " Certainly there are cranky people in this world. If a mother

glares

> at your child for something that's really pretty harmless, quite

> honestly that's her problem, " Rudy said. " But if your child is

going

> to have a meltdown, I don't think it's in anybody's best interest

to

> bring the child along. "

> Joe Schmitt, a Minneapolis lawyer who has often defended

employers

> against claims they discriminated against disabled employees,

said

> people who object to certain accommodations may be viewed as

> insensitive to those with autism or other disabilities.

> " They usually really do care, but they have to weigh the

> considerations of others, " Schmitt said.

> Schmitt said church officials in Minnesota knew they would be

> criticized for banning Adam, but took action after the two sides

> failed to arrive at a compromise.

> " I'm not saying they were right, " Schmitt said of the church.

" But I

> would disagree with anybody who thinks they did that casually or

it

> wasn't important to them. "

> Sandy Boyles, whose 18-year-old son, Walter, is autistic, said

that

> when she began attending First Reformed Church in New Brunswick,

> N.J., she didn't bring him along, because in other churches he

would

> run up and down the aisles screeching

> " She was afraid of being ostracized. I told her, 'So what? Bring

him

> anyway,' " the Rev. Kramer-Mills said.

> Eventually, the small congregation revised its services to

Walter's

> liking. Worship used to start softly and build to a crescendo.

Now,

> it starts with more noise.

> " I have to be careful because sometimes he'll do a fast movement

or

> run, " Boyles said. " But the other members aren't as scared as I

am. "

>

> Report By AP

> Submitted By Associated Press ...

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

> **************Plan your next getaway with AOL Travel. Check out

Today's Hot

> 5 Travel Deals!

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