Re: Need Help!

[Guest guest]

Hi ,

I have a 15 yr old son in 9th grade. He was diagnosed in 6th grade

with OCD and dysgraphia; then in 8th grade an additional diagnosis of

Aspergers (on the autism spectrum). I also have 2 other sons; one

the twin of my OCD son (not identical though) and another who will be

19 in a couple days. I'm a single mom.

Well, sounds like you've been dealing with a lot throughout your

son's life. One thing you said reminded me of my son, he also likes

to correct the teachers!

Being very gifted can also be hard on a child/teen. I'm glad you were

all able to find some alternatives for him when the public school

apparently couldn't fit his needs. A lot of gifted students can have

behavior problems, especially when bored. So have the college

classes been good for him?

I think one of the hardest things with a child or teen when in the

grip of OCD behaviors that they might feel are " no problem " is

getting them to realize it IS a problem and want treatment.

Were the medications helping any before he quit? Did he get worse in

any way after he quit taking them?

I know medication affects each person differently (i.e., 2 people

taking the same medication might react differently), and he really

might not have liked how they made him feel. But maybe you can talk

him into trying therapy for his OCD with no medication.

Medication by itself can't defeat OCD altogether. Cognitive

Behavioral Therapy (CBT) and Exposure & Response Prevention (ERP)

could give him the tools he needs to overcome his OCD without

medication if he's so against taking any right now.

I imagine after all these years, he & you probably know that though,

but he might need to be encouraged again & again.

Do you think you could enlist his girlfriend's help in getting him

into some therapy/treatment? Remind him of ways his OCD is limiting

his life, career choice, being able to clean (pick up clothes, do

dishes...). Girlfriend might find that actually " living " with

someone with OCD is a lot different than when dating them!

Well, I wish I had the magic answer for you instead of just questions

& some thoughts!

single mom, 3 sons

> Hi,

> This is the first time to post on here so please uderstand if it

is

> long. I have a 17 yr old son who has OCD. He was give this label at

> the age of 10. We was give the label ADHD at the age of 4. He has

> alway be very active and smart. He was reading by the time he was

> 31/2 and when he went to grade k they took him out and sent him to

> 1st grade for half the day. He has been going to the local colleage

> since he was 14. We started homeschooling him in second grade

because

> of him being ahead of the other children and getting in trouble at

[Guest guest]

HI :

Thanks for your post and welcome to active membership on the list.

You are describing some very typical OCD symptoms in your son. It

sounds like he has a lot of strengths which will help him to cope with

OCD. Unfortunately even an Einstein would not be able to cope with OCD

without professional help, preferably help targeted to how to deal with

symptoms.

Unfortunately it is impossible to conduct logical discourse with someone

dealing with untreated OCD that is taking over their life. So you can

be very frustrated trying to encourage your son his meds are not causing

his symptoms and he needs more sleep. His OCD will keep his anxiety

high so his sleep will be difficult and depression might be part of this

picture too.

Has your son ever received CBT for his OCD or depression? Mastering

exposure and response prevention therapy can help our kids to live med

free or with lower dosages of meds. The sexual side effects of SSRIs

are of concern to any sexually-active person, and the discussion about

dealing with this and other bothersome side effects, is one your son

needs to take up with his psychiatrist.

Is your son open to trying treatment for his OCD symptoms? Often our

kids act as if they are not, but inside they are desperately eager for

some way out of the problem. Their fear is so consuming that they need

to establish a therapeutic alliance with a skilled CBT therapist to make

progress in pushing OCD more into the background of their lives. Good

luck, please keep us posted about your son's progress, take care, aloha,

kathy (h)

kathy.hi@...

Need Help!

Hi,

This is the first time to post on here so please uderstand if it is

long. I have a 17 yr old son who has OCD. He was give this label at

the age of 10. We was give the label ADHD at the age of 4. He has

alway be very active and smart. He was reading by the time he was

31/2 and when he went to grade k they took him out and sent him to

1st grade for half the day. He has been going to the local colleage

since he was 14. We started homeschooling him in second grade because

of him being ahead of the other children and getting in trouble at

school.Not staying in his seat and if the teacher was teaching and

she said something wrong he would correct the teacher. Not to many

adults like to be corrected by a child. When my son was ten he would

wash his hands none stop then if he saw anything on his hands he

would pick at them until his hands would bleed. I took him in because

he had so many open sore on his hands from him picking them. They did

all kinds of test. His IQ at the age of 10 was 167 and he had the

long term memory of a 32 yr old. They came back with the label as OCD,

ADHD,and mild depression. My son also has some medical problems

Asthma, low blood sugar and JRA.They put him on medication to help

with his problems but at the age of 16 he would long take them. He

said he didn't like how they made him feel? Our doctor said if he

isn't going to take them then he won't give them to him.At the age of

15 my son asked his girl friend to marry him. They planned to get

married in July 2005 . He will be 18 ys old and she will be 19 yrs

old. She is very understand about my son's behavior and medical needs

but i still worry. Now to some of the problems I worry about.

1) My son washes his hair at least 2-5 times in the day. Even when he

is out in the public. He'll wash it in the sink.

2) He doesn't like his hands to get dirty. This keeps him from

working out in the yard. He won't wash dishes because that means he

has to touch the dirty dishes. He won't pick up his clothes he has

worn because they are dirty.

3)He also brushes his teeth every 4 hours.

4) He also has his radio set on 6 and don't no one touch even if he

isn't there to turn it off or if he is asleep.

5) The bigest problem is that he has to correct everyone if he feels

they are wrong. He'll even go to the computer to pull up the right

answer to prove it to you. If doesn't see you for a week he will mail

it to you or show you the correct answer next time he sees you.

I know alot of this is his OCD. I how do I get him to see that his

medication will make him not act this way. He is studying land

scaping. He wants to draw the landscapes not to get his hands dirty.

Also He buit a computer from a empty tower. He did it by his self and

got a tropy from our state congressman at the time. He was 11. Also

How can i get him to sleep. He sleep 2-3 hours the most.

thanks so much

[Guest guest]

Hi and welcome!

I don't have much time right now, but I wanted to welcome you to the

group. I, too, have a 13-year-old daughter. She was diagnosed with

OCD in October of 2002. She has made much progress in terms of the

OCD with SSRI medication (Lexapro in her case) and exposure:response-

prevention behavioral therapy. She also has inattentive ADD and

recently diagnosed insulin-dependent-diabetes. I was also looking

for alternative schooling about three months ago, more because of

the ADD and diabetes that the OCD. We live in Ohio, but I found a

public 'home-school' alternative that may have chapters in your

area. It's called " Connections Academy " , and they have a website

www.connectionsacademy.com. You might look on line there to see if

there's a chapter in your area. All textbooks are supplied as well

as a computer, printer, and internet access. I don't know if home-

schooling would be your 'cup of tea', but I just wanted to let you

know what I found. Things, for us, have turned for the better in

regards to school, so I'm keeping it on the back burner for now.

Again, welcome. Please feel free to share, ask questions, vent,

etc. This is a wonderful support group!

Blessings-

(Ohio)

[Guest guest]

Hi and welcome, also,

I have a 14 year old son who was diagnosed with severe OCD in February so I am

fairly new, also. Our son is having a lot of trouble concentrating right now

and can't handle a lot of school. We do homeschool and I was going to say that

if you do have any interest in that, I could help you get on your way or answer

any questions for you. Let me know and I'll e-mail you back privately, if you'd

like.

Also, I wanted you to know that with medication and therapy such as exposure

response prevention our son is beginning to take a turn for the better and

encourage you to look into both, if you haven't already. I thought things were

pretty bleak for a while but things are getting better - hope that encourages

you. Hang in there and take care.

[Guest guest]

Hi, welcome!!

My now 15 yr old son began having severe OCD behaviors right before

he turned 12. He's lucky he passed 6th grade and maybe even 7th.

And he's considered gifted at school. Well, he wouldn't have passed

without my help (a LOT of help) with schoolwork and the

accommodations we got for him with a 504 Plan at his school. Have

you and the school set up any type of plan for her?

Is she taking any medication, seeing a therapist...?

Can someone at the school guidance office let you know what other

schools are available in the area?

Gotta go, just taking a quick peek at the posts in the group during

lunch!!

single mom, 3 sons

> Hi all!

> I just joined this group. My daughter is 13 and should be entering

> high school in the fall - that is if she makes it out of the 8th

> grade. Her condition has been worsening this year and she cannot

> seem to function at school. Her normally good grades have turned

to

> failing ones. I am looking into other alternatives for high school

> for her. We live in Central New Jersey. Can anybody help me find

> schools to look into?

> Thank you.

[Guest guest]

Well, I remember being in the exact same place a few years ago! My

daughter was diagnosed with OCD while she was in eighth grade

(although she had had it for years). She was getting terrible

grades, being a behavior problem, and I really wondered whether she

would ever do as well as she used to.

Here's what we did:

Aggressively pursue treatment, both medication and therapy. It took

over a year to get her symptoms under control, but there was a

gradual improvement over that time (although it took about 6 months

to begin to see it).

Get a 504 plan for her at school. You are entitled to this on the

basis of the medical diagnosis alone, don't need any other testing,

etc. We arranged for her to turn in work late, stop doing homework

if I thought she had worked long enough, come late to school, etc.

Just removing the biggest hurdles to her doing acceptable work.

Educate her teachers. I wrote a two page information sheet about

OCD and Kati's specific symptoms. I presented it to teachers at a

meeting, so they couldn't just put it aside without reading it.

AFter all this, I started looking at alternative schools. However,

she really wanted to attend the local high school, so I also visited

there. I arranged to visit some typical ninth grade classes and to

talk with the guidance counselor. After careful consideration, I

decided to have her go to the local public high school.

We started out with a teacher meeting, got a good case manager for

her 504 plan, and prayed.

The good news: After a somewhat rocky start, she had done very

well! She is 17, graduating a year early, and is off to college in

the fall. She is on the high honor roll, is active in drama and

music, does gymnastics, and holds down a part-time job.

She still has a cynical " edge " that she didn't have before the OCD

flare up, but she is relatively symptom-free, is off medication, and

is functioning well. So, there is hope!

Keep in touch. This group is a great support.

[Guest guest]

Hi and welcome to the group. Before making a school change, have you

checked into getting accommodations for your daughter at her current school

based on her diagnosis? These accommodations may help her remain in school

and be successful there.

Is she taking an SSRI such as Prozac or Zoloft for OCD? These are usually

dosed in higher amounts to treat OCD than depression, even in a child. If

she is taking medication, she may need a higher dose now, or perhaps

switched to a different one since they do sometimes stop working for unknown

reasons.

Puberty is a common time for OCD to worsen, so that may explain your

daughter's new problems with grades. More intense symptoms, for example

obsessions, may be making it difficult for her to concentrate, listen well,

or remember material at school. Increased time-consuming compulsions can

leave little time for study.

Does she do Cognitive Behavior Therapy with Exposure and Response

Prevention? If not I highly suggest that you find a competent child

therapist for her. This type of therapy reduces and eliminates OCD symptoms

and is the only one that does.

Write again and let us know how things are going.

Take care,

Kathy R. in Indiana

----- Original Message -----

> Hi all!

> I just joined this group. My daughter is 13 and should be entering

> high school in the fall - that is if she makes it out of the 8th

> grade. Her condition has been worsening this year and she cannot

> seem to function at school. Her normally good grades have turned to

> failing ones. I am looking into other alternatives for high school

> for her. We live in Central New Jersey. Can anybody help me find

> schools to look into?

> Thank you.