Guest guest Posted October 11, 2001 Report Share Posted October 11, 2001 Hey everyone, Have you seen the TV show " Rendez-view? " It is a show that sets a man and a woman up for a blind date, and follows them with a camera crew for the whole night. The twist is that there is a panel of four people (consisting of the show host and hostess and a male and female guest host) that analyzes the date as they go. Watching the couple is interesting enough, in a voyeuristic way, but the analysis is what really amazes me. From the beginning, the panel talks of how this guy is this or this girl is that, as if they can already make such judgments. Even more interesting is when they begin to speak of the ever-present " signals. " They talk so matter-of-factly about these signals, and I still don't know where they get this stuff. I often wonder if this nonverbal stuff is real or if it is some imagined, hocus-pocus stuff. I still can't get my mind around the idea that people communicate that way. There does seem to be some sort of consensus, though, as to the presence and meaning of signals. On one episode, several members of the panel talked of the " mixed signals " a woman was emitting. I could not tell if they meant subtle body language or maybe hidden subtext in their vocalizations. Whatever it was, I was baffled. I wish I had videotaped that episode so I could play it back and see if I could figure it out. This is really quite fascinating for me. The inability to interpret body language and to " read between the lines " is so commonly discussed that it is almost a truism among our kind, but it still fascinates me that this ball of nothing means things to some people. I can also see why my own attempts at this game have been, uh, less than a smashing success. Again, my idea that NTs are just too strange for me to be in a relationship with is reinforced... not that such a thing is terribly likely anyway. I think I shall stick to people that don't try to read motives into every little thing I do. I get sort of neurotic about that when I am with NTs sometimes. I wonder if this movement or that glance will be something that they think has meaning. It's as if I have multiple personalities, and the other " me " will sometimes pop up and say things of which the real " me " is unaware. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 12, 2001 Report Share Posted October 12, 2001 << This would be SO much fun to watch, with a group of aspies!!! It would be really interesting for us to be able to watch it together and compare our various reactions/thoughts, and " see " if we're seeing the same thing!! >> Wow....geuss I will have to check it out again sometime. Found it too annoying and depressing when Max and I watched it once, both of us bewildered. " Is that what dates are like, Mom? " he asked. I told him it was a false setting which does not allow for two people to truly get to know the other, but a game, and one that I never learned how to play and refuse to learn how to play. And yet, dear people can come into our lives who are very worth knowing, but seldom do they enter into our lives via that kind of institution... Geuss I can use it as a teaching illustration for him on what to avoid in life... sigh, Nanne Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 12, 2001 Report Share Posted October 12, 2001 This would be SO much fun to watch, with a group of aspies!!! It would be really interesting for us to be able to watch it together and compare our various reactions/thoughts, and " see " if we're seeing the same thing!! , I know exactly what you mean: >> I often wonder if this nonverbal stuff >> is real or if it is some imagined, hocus-pocus stuff. Sometimes I want to run around and check whether other people really DO experience that thing, " closeness " or whether my psychiatrist was just exaggerating somehow, or even pulling my leg! I also wonder sometimes whether I actually HAVE felt these things, or really DO get non-verbal communication, but just haven't noticed it!! Marria on 10/12/01 8:00 AM, Rakus at wendyrakus@... wrote: > I haven't seen it, but it sounds fascinating! What an incredible study aid > for those of us who have trouble understanding non-verbal communication. > I'll have to check it out. > > [AutisticSpectrumTreeHouse] " Rendez-view " TV show > > >> Hey everyone, >> >> Have you seen the TV show " Rendez-view? " It is a show that sets a man >> and a woman up for a blind date, and follows them with a camera crew for >> the whole night. The twist is that there is a panel of four people >> (consisting of the show host and hostess and a male and female guest >> host) that analyzes the date as they go. Watching the couple is >> interesting enough, in a voyeuristic way, but the analysis is what >> really amazes me. >> >> From the beginning, the panel talks of how this guy is this or this girl >> is that, as if they can already make such judgments. Even more >> interesting is when they begin to speak of the ever-present " signals. " >> They talk so matter-of-factly about these signals, and I still don't >> know where they get this stuff. I often wonder if this nonverbal stuff >> is real or if it is some imagined, hocus-pocus stuff. I still can't get >> my mind around the idea that people communicate that way. >> >> There does seem to be some sort of consensus, though, as to the presence >> and meaning of signals. On one episode, several members of the panel >> talked of the " mixed signals " a woman was emitting. I could not tell if >> they meant subtle body language or maybe hidden subtext in their >> vocalizations. Whatever it was, I was baffled. I wish I had videotaped >> that episode so I could play it back and see if I could figure it out. >> >> This is really quite fascinating for me. The inability to interpret >> body language and to " read between the lines " is so commonly discussed >> that it is almost a truism among our kind, but it still fascinates me >> that this ball of nothing means things to some people. I can also see >> why my own attempts at this game have been, uh, less than a smashing >> success. Again, my idea that NTs are just too strange for me to be in a >> relationship with is reinforced... not that such a thing is terribly >> likely anyway. I think I shall stick to people that don't try to read >> motives into every little thing I do. >> >> I get sort of neurotic about that when I am with NTs sometimes. I >> wonder if this movement or that glance will be something that they think >> has meaning. It's as if I have multiple personalities, and the other >> " me " will sometimes pop up and say things of which the real " me " is >> unaware. >> >> >> >> Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 12, 2001 Report Share Posted October 12, 2001 I haven't seen it, but it sounds fascinating! What an incredible study aid for those of us who have trouble understanding non-verbal communication. I'll have to check it out. [AutisticSpectrumTreeHouse] " Rendez-view " TV show >Hey everyone, > >Have you seen the TV show " Rendez-view? " It is a show that sets a man >and a woman up for a blind date, and follows them with a camera crew for >the whole night. The twist is that there is a panel of four people >(consisting of the show host and hostess and a male and female guest >host) that analyzes the date as they go. Watching the couple is >interesting enough, in a voyeuristic way, but the analysis is what >really amazes me. > >From the beginning, the panel talks of how this guy is this or this girl >is that, as if they can already make such judgments. Even more >interesting is when they begin to speak of the ever-present " signals. " >They talk so matter-of-factly about these signals, and I still don't >know where they get this stuff. I often wonder if this nonverbal stuff >is real or if it is some imagined, hocus-pocus stuff. I still can't get >my mind around the idea that people communicate that way. > >There does seem to be some sort of consensus, though, as to the presence >and meaning of signals. On one episode, several members of the panel >talked of the " mixed signals " a woman was emitting. I could not tell if >they meant subtle body language or maybe hidden subtext in their >vocalizations. Whatever it was, I was baffled. I wish I had videotaped >that episode so I could play it back and see if I could figure it out. > >This is really quite fascinating for me. The inability to interpret >body language and to " read between the lines " is so commonly discussed >that it is almost a truism among our kind, but it still fascinates me >that this ball of nothing means things to some people. I can also see >why my own attempts at this game have been, uh, less than a smashing >success. Again, my idea that NTs are just too strange for me to be in a >relationship with is reinforced... not that such a thing is terribly >likely anyway. I think I shall stick to people that don't try to read >motives into every little thing I do. > >I get sort of neurotic about that when I am with NTs sometimes. I >wonder if this movement or that glance will be something that they think >has meaning. It's as if I have multiple personalities, and the other > " me " will sometimes pop up and say things of which the real " me " is >unaware. > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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