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Hi all,

Just wanted to join in and say how glad I am to have found this group.

We are having many similar issues with our 11 year old DS.

School was great last year with a terrific teacher. This year has

been frustrating to say the least. Middle School.

No Fun...It is a long story. My son is doing well in regular classes.

He is having trouble with another child in the spec ed room. His ocd

is getting worse due to the stress of the spec ed room. I am hoping

to get him out of that environment completely.

We recently started a trial of lexapro. We have tried all the ocd

meds over the last 6 years. They always seemed to cause " behavioral "

side effects. Yet we had to try again due to school stress making his

ocd a priority.

In the meantime I am starting to think about trying to get some CBT

for my son. Can anyone recommend anyone in the Phoenix area?

Thanks for this support group,

Tammy

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Hi Tammy,

We use Tomi Hembree-Kigin, PhD. She's located in East Mesa near

Superstition Springs Mall. Her telephone number is 345-0817. I've been

very impressed with her and my 6-year-old (plus other kids I know who

have seen her) absolutely love her. If you want, we can talk off-line

and I'd be happy to answer any of your questions.

Sue in Phoenix

tuttleharry wrote:

> Hi all,

> Just wanted to join in and say how glad I am to have found this group.

> We are having many similar issues with our 11 year old DS.

> School was great last year with a terrific teacher. This year has

> been frustrating to say the least. Middle School.

> No Fun...It is a long story. My son is doing well in regular classes.

> He is having trouble with another child in the spec ed room. His ocd

> is getting worse due to the stress of the spec ed room. I am hoping

> to get him out of that environment completely.

> We recently started a trial of lexapro. We have tried all the ocd

> meds over the last 6 years. They always seemed to cause " behavioral "

> side effects. Yet we had to try again due to school stress making his

> ocd a priority.

> In the meantime I am starting to think about trying to get some CBT

> for my son. Can anyone recommend anyone in the Phoenix area?

> Thanks for this support group,

> Tammy

>

>

>

> *

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  • 1 month later...

Hi and welcome to the list. Sometimes a child with obsessions does a lot of

avoidance rather than repeated physical compulsions that are easier to see

and pick up on. Are the thoughts and ideas he gets stuck on upsetting to

him, do they cause him to not do things in order to avoid triggering them?

If so, doing the things that he has been avoiding in a controlled, step-wise

fashion can help reduce the obsessive thoughts.

I think the easiest way to manage the board emails is to set your membership

preference to " no mail " and go to the yahoo site to read, respond to and

post messages. They are all archived so no matter how much time has gone

by, you can find the ones you haven't read or the ones that deal with topics

you have a special interest in.

Again, welcome,

Kathy R. in Indiana

----- Original Message -----

> Hi, My 8 yr old son was recently diagnosed with OCD, ADD, and other

> learning disabilities. His OCD seems somewhat atypical in that he

> doesn't have any compulsions, but is more obsessive. He gets stuck

> on thought or ideas. He doesn't have any insight to his OCD. He

> can't verbalize or explain his thoughts; just that he gets stuck.

> He is on Prozac and that has been very helpful. He'll now even

> acknowledge that he has OCD, where he wouldn't previously. I am

> concerned because his lack of insight makes CBT difficult. We have

> implemented a few other strategies that his psychologist and he

> worked out and that seems to be helpful. I would appreciate any

> guidance or suggestions that you would have. I look forward to

> participating in this group. Where can I learn how to est manage

> and kkep up with this board? Until next time.

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  • 1 month later...
Guest guest

--- Laurie,

My son has the exact same obsessions as your daughter. He feels like

he has to confess everything-even silly things, but some things

disturbing like you were describing, sexual thoughts, etc. When this

first manifested itself about 3 or 4 years ago, he was afraid he

wanted to stab me-it wasn't directed at anyone else-just me. I was

horrified and didn't react too well. Didn't hide my broken heart too

well, and that was a mistake. It is such a horror, a torture to

experience this. I just could relate to what you were describing.

The Zoloft is helping my son somewhat. He is 9. This site is so

therapeutic in that it provides someone the tools to understand the

disorder as well as such a great support web of people who can

totally emphathize and relate to how hard it is. Take care and best

of luck,

W

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  • 4 years later...

Hi a, Im happy you joined this group. 3 of my 8 children are

autistic. A 20yr daughter,16yr son,10yr son. My 20yr lost her speech

and quit eye contact around 1yr. She always had trouble with

vaccinations. She had high fevers after and got very sick. Finally

her pediatrician had to give her doses of human gamma globulin to aid

or counter act her immuno deficiancy following vaccinations. I quit

the vaccination schedule,exempted- under advice of our Dr. My 16yr

son had a similar experience with vaccinations and had high fevers

with convulsions. I believe vaccinations played a significant part in

their autism. My 10yr son is a twin, was a preemie with a birth

weight under 2lbs. I really relate to you and share your concerns

about our children,their developement and our families relationships

and interactions when our children are autistic. Thanks for sharing

your lives. Sending you the warmth of understanding,

Tishanne

-- In AutismBehaviorProblems , a Calderon

wrote:

>

> Hi Everyone,

>

> My name is a, I am a 24 year old mother of 4 kids aged 4

months (boy), 2 years (girl), 4 years (boy with ASD) and 5 years

(girl). My 4 year old son Donovan was diagnosed with Autism when he

was 25 months old. He never really spoke as a baby other than mama

and dada (with no meaning), but he didn't start to lose eye contact

or start stimming until after he had his 12 month and 18 month

vaccinations. I don't fully believe that these shots caused my son's

autism- but I know they played a role is poisoning his system. Since

his diagnosis he has made much less progress than we had hoped. The

most progress he has made is regaining eye contact, bringing things

he wants opened to us, pushing a chair to climb and get something he

wants and sometimes pushing buttons on a communicative device with

pictures to say what he wants every now and then. He is non-verbal

with no real functional communication for daily needs and desires.

We tried ABA, PECS and signing for the first year and he wouldn't

respond. He throws frequent tantrums, often for no apparent reason.

When he gets upset he will sometimes hit at me. Donovan is

affectionate though. He will come to me for hugs and kisses and

likes to be tickled. But sometimes when giving or receiving

affection, he will pinch me or grab and pull my hair all of the

sudden- when he does this, he is still smiling and does not seem to

understand that he is hurting me. I tell him " no " and I think he

understands what no is, but he continues to do this. He has recently

pulled my mom's hair and she was shocked- I never told her that he

pulled my hair because my family is already weary to be around him

because of the behaviors he exhibits. Donovan also stims all the

time. He stims by flicking his spit with his finders in front of his

eyes and especially in streams of indoor and outdoor light. When he

stims he gets so excited that he stands on his toes and you can

almost feel the excitement and energy building up in him and he says

" aaahhhhh " and other vocalizations when stimming. He also gets

" overstimulated when he stims and will go from being excited to

crying really loudly. Donovan also likes to knock things off of

tables, turn cups filled with liquid upside down, and " mess up "

things by moving them back and forth real fast under his hands. He

used to be totally infatuated with strings and would flick them in

front of his face, now he only flicks them in light and doesn't seem

to be obsessed with them anymore (which is great, he used to unbraid

the hair on his older sisters dolls, tear it out and leave it all

over the house and tear up the strings in carpet.

>

> I often think about his future and fear that my family will never

truly be comfortable around him because he requires so much attention

and tends to destroy their houses. I fear that as he gets older

that, since he is so big (he's only 4 taller than my 5 year old and

weights 49 pounds from height and stature, not fat) that his dad and

I won't be able to physically handle him like we can now, especially

during tantrums.

>

> I often hear how autistic kids tend to have an area they excel at

or have high interest in- I have yet to see what that area might be

for Donovan. I hope and pray that he will grow to be accepted by my

family and his peers, communicate with us in some way and stop his

aggressive behaviors. I have also heard that stimming is

neurodegenerative, so when he tries to stim all the time, I keep

thinking that he is ruining his brain or something by doing it.

>

> It is difficult to say the least, raising four kids that already

have health issues like sever eczema and asthma, sleeping issues,

etc. then to worry about Donovan all the time and how his future will

be is enough to really stress me out. On top of everything else, I

go to school full-time, work full-time and never seem to bet sleep.

My children's father is a tremendous help, but both of us are

exhausted and we often get discouraged at the lack of progress for

Donovan.

>

> I do not want to medicate my son. I have read how often these

stimulants and anti-depressants are medicines made for adults, but

given to children in lower doses- with no real un-biased studies of

their efficacy in children. I have also seen first hand how children

who are on medicines as kids, grow up and stop taking their medicine,

and the chemical imbalance is a sort of shock to their system and

they act out violently. And that these acts of violence or rage make

people think that " they need their medicine " when in fact their body

is going through withdrawal.

>

> I want to snap Donovan into our world naturally and soon, with out

causing so much stress on his siblings. (His tantrums make the other

kids cry and get scared>)

>

> I hope someone can relate to my situation and give me some advice

on how to help my son. I would also like to know what services your

children get through the school district and if you get daily living

skills assistance also and if so, how did you get those services.

>

> Thanks for taking the time to read my story.

>

> a Calderon

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

______________________________________________________________________

> This e-mail has been scanned by MCI Managed Email Content Service,

using Skeptic technology powered by MessageLabs. For more

information on MCI's Managed Email Content Service, visit http://

www.mci.com.

>

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>

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Hi ,

I really understand what you are going through. My son started therapy before he was 2 and nothing really happened. The therapists and I worked with him one on one 20 -30 hours a week with ABA, PECS, speech and OT. He just didn't seem to have any idea what we wanted and would get frustrated and angry. He couldn't even do an NVI (Non Verbal Imitation). You would touch your nose and say do this and he would just look at you blankly- You would hand over hand him and give him a reward and the next time the same response!! It was so frustrating. This went on for almost a year. Then one day he looked at us and got it! He smiled touched his nose and mastered the complete program in 3 weeks. It was like a light bulb went on in his head- OH that's what you want!! After that he did much better in therapy and now he is 8 and has some language (wants,needs,some commenting), he is doing well

in a 2nd grade class with an aid. For the most part he is pretty happy. We had a lot of behavioral problems this summer but we put him on Adderall to help him concentrate, and 2.5mg of Prozac to help him calm easier. This is something I fought for a very long time but what a difference it makes for him. He doesn't want to feel so frustrated all the time and the Adderall helps him concentrate on his school work and on what we say to him. He is a much happier kid and you can tell he feels much more successful in school and at home. He even claps when the school bus pulls up!! At the end of last year he was hiding his shoes in the morning so he couldn't go to school. I guess I'm trying to say sometimes it takes a little longer to get them going but don't get to discouraged the light bulb will go on. Kellie

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Hi ,

Thanks for sharing your story. It

does seem like and Donovan have some things in common as do we. We

are both young mothers dealing with autism. And yes, I have learned to

accept and love all my kids no matter what.

My 2 year old daughter likes to rock in a

rocking chair and likes to feel fabrics, but I’m not too worried either

because she has great eye contact, is very social, counts to twenty, says her

abc’s, responds well to everyone, but still doesn’t talk as much as

my oldest daughter did at her age. We will see how things go.

Donovan does not have too many sensory

issues. He is a good eater and is not picky when it comes to

textures. He does like to put things in his mouth and struggles to give

up the bottle at bed time. Each time we try to eliminate the bottle, the

longest time we went was 3 days with no bottle, he would spend each night

crying for 3-4 hours non-stop, hitting himself really hard in the forehead and

top of his head, kick the wall and scream all night. I regretted letting

his dad give him the bottle on that third night because although it was very

rough and the Donovan kept waking the other kids, I wish I would’ve just

kept at it because I hate that he uses the bottle at night time. I

understand their dad though because we are all so exhausted all the time and

never get sleep, so it’s one thing to have Donovan crying all night and

it’s another when he wakes up Mya (my two year old) and Devin (my 4 month

old) and three kids are crying all night, then we have to wake up early. My

hope is that my parents will keep my other three kids for like a Friday,

Saturday and Sunday and we can try to eliminate the bottle again. But my

parents are having martial issues right now so I’m not sure how soon this

will happen.

That’s awesome that he has some

words and is doing well with PECs.

My son never responded to PECS,

he would just stare at the picture he wanted, so we would hand-over-hand make

him touch it for almost a year and he never touches the picture, just

stares. Donovan goes to a developmentally disabled preschool 4 days per

week for three hours each day. He receives speech and occupational

therapy and is in a class of 3 kids with one special ed instructor and two

paras. However, I feel that my child is considered the “problem kid”

because he requires so much attention and often requires full physical

assistance to make him do things that the other two kids will do naturally

(like sit down for circle time or at the table for snack time). I really

want help on daily living skills for Donovan. His IEP goals are so basic (like

put personal belongings in cubby, attend for circle time for 15 minutes).

True, he struggles with basic tasks like this but and I would like help on how

to get more services that will actually make a greater impact on his future.

a

From:

AutismBehaviorProblems

[mailto:AutismBehaviorProblems ] On Behalf Of Tibbetts

Sent: Tuesday, September 16, 2008

9:22 PM

To:

AutismBehaviorProblems

Subject: Re: New to

Group

Hello a,

My name is ,

I am a 21 year old mother of two kids aged 1 year-girl and a 2 year old boy. My

son also has Autism. Diagnosed at 18 months.My son also spoke as a very young

child (about 9 - 11 months ) saying things like mama ,baba dada, sometime with

the meaning of the word and other times just to say it. Then very suddenly

around his 1st bithday he stopped all words and we noticed how he was always in

his own little world and didn't make eye contact and was very affraid of other

people. We soon found out why. It was very hard for me still is sometimes. But

I was able to move forward and relialize that he was still the same I

have aways known and loved and I would love him no matter what. As I'm sure you

have.

Your son's symptoms sound alot like my son's

as well.... He is a stimmer. He stands on his tippy toes alot when he is

excited, he flails his arms and makes very loud vocalizations and yells as

well, he also runs back in forth when excited (while yelling ) he is very lovey

to us and he is very rough.... he does pull hair sometimes or kick also not on

purpose but we are usually able to control his aggresiveness. He is usually a

very happy boy but can throw small tantrums here and there. Those are also

usually easily nutrealized. is able to express what he needs in a very

small manner right now. does some signs.... " more " and he has

almost conqeured " all done " ,he also is doing well with the PECS system (((

goes to a developmentally disabled pre-school locally 5 days a week for

about 3 hours every morning. He recieves ABA

style teaching. He is recieving Speech, Occupational therapy, and one on one

developmental therapy.He has been going for a year in December. It is really

doing him good.))) Anyways.... hope i haven't lost you yet...haha

has just recently been giving us a few words and sounds! He said

" mama " once at school, he has also been saying " mo "

for more and using the sign as well as saying the " baba " sound ALOT

and saying it here at home and at school " bubbles " . ( jason is a big

fan of bubbles)

When it comes to our family people are just curios

and accepting but get togethers can be hard. I am very sorry to hear that your

family is not very accepting and weary of your son.My daughter..... well

she has her up and downs with him. When she was a baby she would get very

scared and cry while jason was beeing very over excited and loud but over time

she seemed to overcome it and except it. She still can get a litlle fussy

sometimes. As for how they get along... most of the time they are together and

knows she is there but does not really bother with her and other times

they will fight over something and he will try to move her and if she does not

move he will shove her causing her to cry for a good 10 minutes sometimes. But

most of the time they are nice. I do catch him holding her hand sometimes or

trying to hug her, some sort of affection so I know he must love her.

My daughter, andria, also does not talk yet she is 18

months.. I know she is still young so I'm not super worried. She does

have a few words and sounds but I think she is too lazy sometimes to

say anything. She does say " mama " , " baba " " yeah "

,and makes the " e " sound but like I said not alot

because I think she doesn't have the example from her brother

and also being lazy.I am not worried about Autism though . She makes good eye

contact and just doesn't have many syptoms. She is very curious of and

always wants to do what he is. She definitaly loves him and has grown to be understanding

of his loudness and over excitability.

My son has alot of sensory issues... what

about your son??? My jason is a very picky eater. Having a very small food

selection. All food alike in texture and color, he always wants things in his

mouth. We have chewies for him and he still sucks on a binky at nap and bed

time. throws little crums and things while eating..... he just

doesn't seem to like them I guess. haha.

I also share your feeling with not

wanting to medicate your son.. I don't think I ever will. Right now my

sons treatment seems to be working.Besides the speech improvements he has

regained eye contact and is improving motor skills and so forth. He has also

opened up more socially to other people wich I think is the biggest improvement

he has made.

I am sorry to hear about your son's treatment

not working so well. I am interested in what he is getting right now for help.

There were so many alike features in your story to mine and I really hope that

we could get to know each other well. I have been hoping to find someone with

the same struggles as myself. I wish you the best and I hope to hear from you

soon! Thanks for reading... i know it was very long

haha.

New to Group

Hi Everyone,

My name is

a, I am a 24 year old mother of 4 kids aged 4 months (boy), 2 years

(girl), 4 years (boy with ASD) and 5 years (girl). My 4 year old

son Donovan was diagnosed with Autism when he was 25 months old. He never

really spoke as a baby other than mama and dada (with no meaning), but he

didn’t start to lose eye contact or start stimming until after he had his

12 month and 18 month vaccinations. I don’t fully believe that

these shots caused my son’s autism- but I know they played a role is poisoning

his system. Since his diagnosis he has made much less progress than we

had hoped. The most progress he has made is regaining eye contact,

bringing things he wants opened to us, pushing a chair to climb and get

something he wants and sometimes pushing buttons on a communicative device with

pictures to say what he wants every now and then. He is non-verbal with

no real functional communication for daily needs and desires. We tried ABA , PECS

and signing for the first year and he wouldn’t respond. He throws

frequent tantrums, often for no apparent reason. When he gets upset he

will sometimes hit at me. Donovan is affectionate though. He will

come to me for hugs and kisses and likes to be tickled. But sometimes

when giving or receiving affection, he will pinch me or grab and pull my hair

all of the sudden- when he does this, he is still smiling and does not seem to

understand that he is hurting me. I tell him “no” and I think

he understands what no is, but he continues to do this. He has recently

pulled my mom’s hair and she was shocked- I never told her that he pulled

my hair because my family is already weary to be around him because of the

behaviors he exhibits. Donovan also stims all the time. He stims by

flicking his spit with his finders in front of his eyes and especially in

streams of indoor and outdoor light. When he stims he gets so excited

that he stands on his toes and you can almost feel the excitement and energy

building up in him and he says “aaahhhhh” and other vocalizations

when stimming. He also gets “overstimulated when he stims and will

go from being excited to crying really loudly. Donovan also likes to

knock things off of tables, turn cups filled with liquid upside down, and

“mess up” things by moving them back and forth real fast under his

hands. He used to be totally infatuated with strings and would flick them

in front of his face, now he only flicks them in light and doesn’t seem

to be obsessed with them anymore (which is great, he used to unbraid the hair

on his older sisters dolls, tear it out and leave it all over the house and

tear up the strings in carpet.

I often

think about his future and fear that my family will never truly be comfortable

around him because he requires so much attention and tends to destroy their

houses. I fear that as he gets older that, since he is so big (he’s

only 4 taller than my 5 year old and weights 49 pounds from height and stature,

not fat) that his dad and I won’t be able to physically handle him like

we can now, especially during tantrums.

I often hear

how autistic kids tend to have an area they excel at or have high interest in-

I have yet to see what that area might be for Donovan. I hope and pray

that he will grow to be accepted by my family and his peers, communicate with

us in some way and stop his aggressive behaviors. I have also heard that

stimming is neurodegenerative, so when he tries to stim all the time, I keep

thinking that he is ruining his brain or something by doing it.

It is

difficult to say the least, raising four kids that already have health issues

like sever eczema and asthma, sleeping issues, etc. then to worry about Donovan

all the time and how his future will be is enough to really stress me

out. On top of everything else, I go to school full-time, work full-time

and never seem to bet sleep. My children’s father is a tremendous

help, but both of us are exhausted and we often get discouraged at the lack of

progress for Donovan.

I do not

want to medicate my son. I have read how often these stimulants and

anti-depressants are medicines made for adults, but given to children in lower

doses- with no real un-biased studies of their efficacy in children. I

have also seen first hand how children who are on medicines as kids, grow up

and stop taking their medicine, and the chemical imbalance is a sort of shock

to their system and they act out violently. And that these acts of

violence or rage make people think that “they need their medicine”

when in fact their body is going through withdrawal.

I want to snap

Donovan into our world naturally and soon, with out causing so much stress on

his siblings. (His tantrums make the other kids cry and get scared>)

I hope

someone can relate to my situation and give me some advice on how to help my

son. I would also like to know what services your children get through

the school district and if you get daily living skills assistance also and if

so, how did you get those services.

Thanks for

taking the time to read my story.

a Calderon

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Thanks for your kind words, e.

I am no longer sad that my son has Autism. In fact, his diagnosis makes

me appreciate the smaller things in life and has taught me to accept others

much more than I did before. I look forward to connecting with all of

you.

a

From:

AutismBehaviorProblems

[mailto:AutismBehaviorProblems ] On Behalf Of Two Blessings

Sent: Tuesday, September 16, 2008

10:46 PM

To: AutismBehaviorProblems

Subject: Re: New to

Group

Hello...and Welcome

to the group :) It is a wonderful group. I have a child who is very

young yet, so I have no suggestions...other than to say welcome --- take a

look, as there are many here who have walked similar paths...we are all in this

together, and while I'm sad that so many of our children are diagnosed

with ASD, I'm so very grateful for all the mother's who have walked this path

before, and can teach me. Blessings to you...

e

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Beautifully put, and very true for me as well.

Talk soon...

e

New to Group

Recent Activity

14

New Members

Visit Your Group

Meditation and

Lovingkindness

A Yahoo! Group

to share and learn.

Yahoo! Health

Achy Joint?

Common arthritis

myths debunked.

Yahoo! Groups

Cat Zone

Connect w/ others

who love cats.

..

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Hi Stacie,

I am from Blue Springs,

Missouri, a suburb of Kansas City, Missouri.

What is SI? That must be difficult for your daughter to deal with having

ticks I hope that she has made some friends that accept her. And the

seizure disorder? It’s hard enough helping our kids deal autism but

to have other disorders, which must be very challenging for your you and your

children. I hope you have a support system in place. Do you

children speak? Do they have sensory issues?

a

From:

AutismBehaviorProblems

[mailto:AutismBehaviorProblems ] On Behalf Of hawkie6@...

Sent: Tuesday, September 16, 2008

11:03 PM

To: AutismBehaviorProblems

Subject: Re: New to

Group

a,

I can relate in so much you have

said. I have 3 kids. is is almost 13, is 10 and is

5. was diagnosed with ASD in May and also SI. She also has a tick

disorder. has autism, a seizure disorder and also SI. I am

married to Jim and we live in Aurora IL. Where are you from?

Welcome to the group.

Stacie

In a message dated 9/16/2008 6:05:58 P.M.

Pacific Daylight Time, lcalderonnational (DOT) edu writes:

Hi Everyone,

My name is a, I am a 24 year old mother of 4 kids

aged 4 months (boy), 2 years (girl), 4 years (boy with ASD) and 5 years

(girl). My 4 year old son Donovan was diagnosed with Autism when he

was 25 months old. He never really spoke as a baby other than mama and

dada (with no meaning), but he didn’t start to lose eye contact or start

stimming until after he had his 12 month and 18 month vaccinations. I

don’t fully believe that these shots caused my son’s autism- but I

know they played a role is poisoning his system. Since his diagnosis he

has made much less progress than we had hoped. The most progress he has

made is regaining eye contact, bringing things he wants opened to us, pushing a

chair to climb and get something he wants and sometimes pushing buttons on a

communicative device with pictures to say what he wants every now and

then. He is non-verbal with no real functional communication for daily

needs and desires. We tried ABA,

PECS

and signing for the first year and he wouldn’t respond. He throws

frequent tantrums, often for no apparent reason. When he gets upset he

will sometimes hit at me. Donovan is affectionate though. He will

come to me for hugs and kisses and likes to be tickled. But sometimes

when giving or receiving affection, he will pinch me or grab and pull my hair

all of the sudden- when he does this, he is still smiling and does not seem to

understand that he is hurting me. I tell him “no” and I think

he understands what no is, but he continues to do this. He has recently

pulled my mom’s hair and she was shocked- I never told her that he pulled

my hair because my family is already weary to be around him because of the

behaviors he exhibits. Donovan also stims all the time. He stims by

flicking his spit with his finders in front of his eyes and especially in

streams of indoor and outdoor light. When he stims he gets so excited

that he stands on his toes and you can almost feel the excitement and energy

building up in him and he says “aaahhhhh” and other vocalizations

when stimming. He also gets “overstimulated when he stims and will

go from being excited to crying really loudly. Donovan also likes to

knock things off of tables, turn cups filled with liquid upside down, and

“mess up” things by moving them back and forth real fast under his

hands. He used to be totally infatuated with strings and would flick them

in front of his face, now he only flicks them in light and doesn’t seem

to be obsessed with them anymore (which is great, he used to unbraid the hair

on his older sisters dolls, tear it out and leave it all over the house and

tear up the strings in carpet.

I often think about his future and fear that my family will

never truly be comfortable around him because he requires so much attention and

tends to destroy their houses. I fear that as he gets older that, since

he is so big (he’s only 4 taller than my 5 year old and weights 49 pounds

from height and stature, not fat) that his dad and I won’t be able to

physically handle him like we can now, especially during tantrums.

I often hear how autistic kids tend to have an area they

excel at or have high interest in- I have yet to see what that area might be

for Donovan. I hope and pray that he will grow to be accepted by my

family and his peers, communicate with us in some way and stop his aggressive

behaviors. I have also heard that stimming is neurodegenerative, so when

he tries to stim all the time, I keep thinking that he is ruining his brain or

something by doing it.

It is difficult to say the least, raising four kids that

already have health issues like sever eczema and asthma, sleeping issues, etc.

then to worry about Donovan all the time and how his future will be is enough

to really stress me out. On top of everything else, I go to school

full-time, work full-time and never seem to bet sleep. My

children’s father is a tremendous help, but both of us are exhausted and

we often get discouraged at the lack of progress for Donovan.

I do not want to medicate my son. I have read how

often these stimulants and anti-depressants are medicines made for adults, but

given to children in lower doses- with no real un-biased studies of their

efficacy in children. I have also seen first hand how children who are on

medicines as kids, grow up and stop taking their medicine, and the chemical

imbalance is a sort of shock to their system and they act out violently.

And that these acts of violence or rage make people think that “they need

their medicine” when in fact their body is going through

withdrawal.

I want to snap Donovan into our world naturally and soon,

with out causing so much stress on his siblings. (His tantrums make the

other kids cry and get scared>)

I hope someone can relate to my situation and give me some

advice on how to help my son. I would also like to know what services

your children get through the school district and if you get daily living

skills assistance also and if so, how did you get those services.

Thanks for taking the time to read my story.

a Calderon

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Hi Tishanne,

I’m curiouis to know how your

children are functioning, especially since they are much older than mine. Like

I said before I often wonder and worry about the future. I would als like to

get more information on vaccinating on an alternative schedule for my 4 month

and two year old. If you know where I should look, please tell me. My two

year old has only had one “thimersol-free” vaccine. But we go from

doctor to doctor because I cannot find anyone to support my beliefs and be a

partner to help my kids- just criticism and usually “the American academy

of pediatrics” says spiels with each new PCP visit.

a

From:

AutismBehaviorProblems

[mailto:AutismBehaviorProblems ] On Behalf Of tishannepatterson

Sent: Wednesday, September 17,

2008 1:28 AM

To:

AutismBehaviorProblems

Subject: Re: New to

Group

Hi a, Im happy you joined this group. 3 of my 8

children are

autistic. A 20yr daughter,16yr son,10yr son. My 20yr lost her speech

and quit eye contact around 1yr. She always had trouble with

vaccinations. She had high fevers after and got very sick. Finally

her pediatrician had to give her doses of human gamma globulin to aid

or counter act her immuno deficiancy following vaccinations. I quit

the vaccination schedule,exempted- under advice of our Dr. My 16yr

son had a similar experience with vaccinations and had high fevers

with convulsions. I believe vaccinations played a significant part in

their autism. My 10yr son is a twin, was a preemie with a birth

weight under 2lbs. I really relate to you and share your concerns

about our children,their developement and our families relationships

and interactions when our children are autistic. Thanks for sharing

your lives. Sending you the warmth of understanding,

Tishanne

-- In AutismBehaviorProblems ,

a Calderon

wrote:

>

> Hi Everyone,

>

> My name is a, I am a 24 year old mother of 4 kids aged 4

months (boy), 2 years (girl), 4 years (boy with ASD) and 5 years

(girl). My 4 year old son Donovan was diagnosed with Autism when he

was 25 months old. He never really spoke as a baby other than mama

and dada (with no meaning), but he didn't start to lose eye contact

or start stimming until after he had his 12 month and 18 month

vaccinations. I don't fully believe that these shots caused my son's

autism- but I know they played a role is poisoning his system. Since

his diagnosis he has made much less progress than we had hoped. The

most progress he has made is regaining eye contact, bringing things

he wants opened to us, pushing a chair to climb and get something he

wants and sometimes pushing buttons on a communicative device with

pictures to say what he wants every now and then. He is non-verbal

with no real functional communication for daily needs and desires.

We tried ABA, PECS and signing for the first year and he

wouldn't

respond. He throws frequent tantrums, often for no apparent reason.

When he gets upset he will sometimes hit at me. Donovan is

affectionate though. He will come to me for hugs and kisses and

likes to be tickled. But sometimes when giving or receiving

affection, he will pinch me or grab and pull my hair all of the

sudden- when he does this, he is still smiling and does not seem to

understand that he is hurting me. I tell him " no " and I think he

understands what no is, but he continues to do this. He has recently

pulled my mom's hair and she was shocked- I never told her that he

pulled my hair because my family is already weary to be around him

because of the behaviors he exhibits. Donovan also stims all the

time. He stims by flicking his spit with his finders in front of his

eyes and especially in streams of indoor and outdoor light. When he

stims he gets so excited that he stands on his toes and you can

almost feel the excitement and energy building up in him and he says

" aaahhhhh " and other vocalizations when stimming. He also gets

" overstimulated when he stims and will go from being excited to

crying really loudly. Donovan also likes to knock things off of

tables, turn cups filled with liquid upside down, and " mess up "

things by moving them back and forth real fast under his hands. He

used to be totally infatuated with strings and would flick them in

front of his face, now he only flicks them in light and doesn't seem

to be obsessed with them anymore (which is great, he used to unbraid

the hair on his older sisters dolls, tear it out and leave it all

over the house and tear up the strings in carpet.

>

> I often think about his future and fear that my family will never

truly be comfortable around him because he requires so much attention

and tends to destroy their houses. I fear that as he gets older

that, since he is so big (he's only 4 taller than my 5 year old and

weights 49 pounds from height and stature, not fat) that his dad and

I won't be able to physically handle him like we can now, especially

during tantrums.

>

> I often hear how autistic kids tend to have an area they excel at

or have high interest in- I have yet to see what that area might be

for Donovan. I hope and pray that he will grow to be accepted by my

family and his peers, communicate with us in some way and stop his

aggressive behaviors. I have also heard that stimming is

neurodegenerative, so when he tries to stim all the time, I keep

thinking that he is ruining his brain or something by doing it.

>

> It is difficult to say the least, raising four kids that already

have health issues like sever eczema and asthma, sleeping issues,

etc. then to worry about Donovan all the time and how his future will

be is enough to really stress me out. On top of everything else, I

go to school full-time, work full-time and never seem to bet sleep.

My children's father is a tremendous help, but both of us are

exhausted and we often get discouraged at the lack of progress for

Donovan.

>

> I do not want to medicate my son. I have read how often these

stimulants and anti-depressants are medicines made for adults, but

given to children in lower doses- with no real un-biased studies of

their efficacy in children. I have also seen first hand how children

who are on medicines as kids, grow up and stop taking their medicine,

and the chemical imbalance is a sort of shock to their system and

they act out violently. And that these acts of violence or rage make

people think that " they need their medicine " when in fact their body

is going through withdrawal.

>

> I want to snap Donovan into our world naturally and soon, with out

causing so much stress on his siblings. (His tantrums make the other

kids cry and get scared>)

>

> I hope someone can relate to my situation and give me some advice

on how to help my son. I would also like to know what services your

children get through the school district and if you get daily living

skills assistance also and if so, how did you get those services.

>

> Thanks for taking the time to read my story.

>

> a Calderon

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

__________________________________________________________

> This e-mail has been scanned by MCI Managed Email Content Service,

using Skeptic technology powered by MessageLabs. For more

information on MCI's Managed Email Content Service, visit http://

www.mci.com.

>

__________________________________________________________

>

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Thanks for sharing your story,

Kellie. I truly hope that Donovan’s light bulb will come on!

Shine on me baby!! I know it must be frustrating to him not being able to

communicate what he wants and trying to understand what we want from him.

What services does your son get now? Does he stim a lot? If so, how

do you handle stimming?

Thanks,

a

From:

AutismBehaviorProblems

[mailto:AutismBehaviorProblems ] On Behalf Of Kellie Folkerts

Sent: Wednesday, September 17, 2008

5:51 AM

To:

AutismBehaviorProblems

Subject: Re: New to

Group

Hi ,

I really understand what you are going

through. My son started therapy before he was 2 and nothing really

happened. The therapists and I worked with him one on one 20 -30 hours

a week with ABA, PECS, speech and OT. He just didn't

seem to have any idea what we wanted and would get frustrated and angry. He

couldn't even do an NVI (Non Verbal Imitation). You would touch your

nose and say do this and he would just look at you blankly- You would hand

over hand him and give him a reward and the next time the same

response!! It was so frustrating. This went on for almost a

year. Then one day he looked at us and got it! He smiled touched

his nose and mastered the complete program in 3 weeks. It was like a

light bulb went on in his head- OH that's what you want!! After that he

did much better in therapy and now he is 8 and has some language (wants,needs,some

commenting), he is doing well in a 2nd grade class with an aid. For the

most part he is pretty happy. We had a lot of behavioral problems this

summer but we put him on Adderall to help him concentrate, and 2.5mg of

Prozac to help him calm easier. This is something I fought for a very

long time but what a difference it makes for him. He doesn't want to

feel so frustrated all the time and the Adderall helps him concentrate on his

school work and on what we say to him. He is a much happier kid and you

can tell he feels much more successful in school and at home. He even

claps when the school bus pulls up!! At the end of last year he was hiding

his shoes in the morning so he couldn't go to school. I guess I'm trying to

say sometimes it takes a little longer to get them going but don't get to

discouraged the light bulb will go on. Kellie

______________________________________________________________________

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Hi ,

I know what I'm about to say isn't going to be popular but I have to say it. I'm not trying to scare anyone or change anyones mind on anything but groups are about sharing your personal experience and I really feel the need to share this with you all. was 2 and we had just started seeing a DAN doctor. My daughter had just been born and he recommended no vaccines for her. We were (and still are) very afraid of having another autistic child so we didn't give her any. When she was 10 months I asked about giving her some on a different schedule(not so many at one time) and he said yes when she was 2 we would start them. On Dec. 8 2003 I put to bed she was fine and the next morning she was gone. She had contracted Strep which turned into meningitis and it went so quickly it only took hours from onset to death. We will always regret not having her vaccinated and we can't

take it back. Our daughter Paige was born in 2005 and we had her vaccinated at a slower rate. I'm really not trying to scare anyone. I just needed to tell you what we have experienced. Kellie>> Hi Everyone,> > My name is a, I am a 24 year old mother of 4 kids aged 4 months (boy), 2 years (girl), 4 years (boy with ASD) and 5 years (girl). My 4 year old son Donovan was diagnosed with Autism when he was 25 months old. He never really spoke as a baby other than mama and dada (with no meaning), but he didn't start to lose eye contact or start stimming until after he had his 12 month and 18 month vaccinations. I don't fully believe that these shots caused my son's autism- but I know they played a role is poisoning his system. Since his diagnosis he has made much less progress than we had hoped. The

most progress he has made is regaining eye contact, bringing things he wants opened to us, pushing a chair to climb and get something he wants and sometimes pushing buttons on a communicative device with pictures to say what he wants every now and then. He is non-verbal with no real functional communication for daily needs and desires. We tried ABA , PECS and signing for the first year and he wouldn't respond. He throws frequent tantrums, often for no apparent reason. When he gets upset he will sometimes hit at me. Donovan is affectionate though. He will come to me for hugs and kisses and likes to be tickled. But sometimes when giving or receiving affection, he will pinch me or grab and pull my hair all of the sudden- when he does this, he is still smiling and does not seem to understand that he is hurting me. I tell him "no" and I think he understands what no is, but he continues to do this. He

has recently pulled my mom's hair and she was shocked- I never told her that he pulled my hair because my family is already weary to be around him because of the behaviors he exhibits. Donovan also stims all the time. He stims by flicking his spit with his finders in front of his eyes and especially in streams of indoor and outdoor light. When he stims he gets so excited that he stands on his toes and you can almost feel the excitement and energy building up in him and he says "aaahhhhh" and other vocalizations when stimming. He also gets "overstimulated when he stims and will go from being excited to crying really loudly. Donovan also likes to knock things off of tables, turn cups filled with liquid upside down, and "mess up" things by moving them back and forth real fast under his hands. He used to be totally infatuated with strings and would flick them in front of his face, now he only flicks

them in light and doesn't seem to be obsessed with them anymore (which is great, he used to unbraid the hair on his older sisters dolls, tear it out and leave it all over the house and tear up the strings in carpet.> > I often think about his future and fear that my family will never truly be comfortable around him because he requires so much attention and tends to destroy their houses. I fear that as he gets older that, since he is so big (he's only 4 taller than my 5 year old and weights 49 pounds from height and stature, not fat) that his dad and I won't be able to physically handle him like we can now, especially during tantrums.> > I often hear how autistic kids tend to have an area they excel at or have high interest in- I have yet to see what that area might be for Donovan. I hope and pray that he will grow to be accepted by my family and his peers, communicate with us in

some way and stop his aggressive behaviors. I have also heard that stimming is neurodegenerative, so when he tries to stim all the time, I keep thinking that he is ruining his brain or something by doing it.> > It is difficult to say the least, raising four kids that already have health issues like sever eczema and asthma, sleeping issues, etc. then to worry about Donovan all the time and how his future will be is enough to really stress me out. On top of everything else, I go to school full-time, work full-time and never seem to bet sleep. My children's father is a tremendous help, but both of us are exhausted and we often get discouraged at the lack of progress for Donovan.> > I do not want to medicate my son. I have read how often these stimulants and anti-depressants are medicines made for adults, but given to children in lower doses- with no real un-biased studies of

their efficacy in children. I have also seen first hand how children who are on medicines as kids, grow up and stop taking their medicine, and the chemical imbalance is a sort of shock to their system and they act out violently. And that these acts of violence or rage make people think that "they need their medicine" when in fact their body is going through withdrawal.> > I want to snap Donovan into our world naturally and soon, with out causing so much stress on his siblings. (His tantrums make the other kids cry and get scared>)> > I hope someone can relate to my situation and give me some advice on how to help my son. I would also like to know what services your children get through the school district and if you get daily living skills assistance also and if so, how did you get those services.> > Thanks for taking the time to read my story.> >

a Calderon> > > > > > > > ____________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _> This e-mail has been scanned by MCI Managed Email Content Service, using Skeptic technology powered by MessageLabs. For more information on MCI's Managed Email Content Service, visit http://www.mci.com.> ____________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _>

____________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _________ ____This e-mail has been scanned by MCI Managed Email Content Service, using Skeptic technology powered by MessageLabs. For more information on MCI's Managed Email Content Service, visit http://www.mci. com.____________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _________ ________________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _________ ____This e-mail has been scanned by MCI Managed Email Content Service, using Skeptic technology powered by MessageLabs. For more information on MCI's Managed Email Content Service, visit http://www.mci. com.____________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _________ ____

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Oh, Kellie. I too vaccinate for this very reason. has never regressed after his vaccinations...did they trigger his Autism, I'm afraid we may never know, but I do know that I don't want to lose his life, and that is why I choose to vaccinate.. It is not a popular stance in the Autistic community, but I do believe that there must be a place for all of us...we all choose to do Autism differently....Thank you so much for sharing. God love you!

e

RE: Re: New to Group

Hi ,

I know what I'm about to say isn't going to be popular but I have to say it. I'm not trying to scare anyone or change anyones mind on anything but groups are about sharing your personal experience and I really feel the need to share this with you all. was 2 and we had just started seeing a DAN doctor. My daughter had just been born and he recommended no vaccines for her. We were (and still are) very afraid of having another autistic child so we didn't give her any. When she was 10 months I asked about giving her some on a different schedule(not so many at one time) and he said yes when she was 2 we would start them. On Dec. 8 2003 I put to bed she was fine and the next morning she was gone. She had contracted Strep which turned into meningitis and it went so quickly it only took hours from onset to death. We will always regret not having her vaccinated and we can't

take it back. Our daughter Paige was born in 2005 and we had her vaccinated at a slower rate. I'm really not trying to scare anyone. I just needed to tell you what we have experienced. Kellie>> Hi Everyone,> > My name is a, I am a 24 year old mother of 4 kids aged 4 months (boy), 2 years (girl), 4 years (boy with ASD) and 5 years (girl). My 4 year old son Donovan was diagnosed with Autism when he was 25 months old. He never really spoke as a baby other than mama and dada (with no meaning), but he didn't start to lose eye contact or start stimming until after he had his 12 month and 18 month vaccinations. I don't fully believe that these shots caused my son's autism- but I know they played a role is poisoning his system. Since his

diagnosis he has made much less progress than we had hoped. The most progress he has made is regaining eye contact, bringing things he wants opened to us, pushing a chair to climb and get something he wants and sometimes pushing buttons on a communicative device with pictures to say what he wants every now and then. He is non-verbal with no real functional communication for daily needs and desires. We tried ABA , PECS and signing for the first year and he wouldn't respond. He throws frequent tantrums, often for no apparent reason. When he gets upset he will sometimes hit at me. Donovan is affectionate though. He will come to me for hugs and kisses and likes to be tickled. But sometimes when giving or receiving affection, he will pinch me or grab and pull my hair all of the sudden- when he does this, he is still smiling and does not seem to understand that he is hurting me. I tell him "no" and I think

he understands what no is, but he continues to do this. He has recently pulled my mom's hair and she was shocked- I never told her that he pulled my hair because my family is already weary to be around him because of the behaviors he exhibits. Donovan also stims all the time. He stims by flicking his spit with his finders in front of his eyes and especially in streams of indoor and outdoor light. When he stims he gets so excited that he stands on his toes and you can almost feel the excitement and energy building up in him and he says "aaahhhhh" and other vocalizations when stimming. He also gets "overstimulated when he stims and will go from being excited to crying really loudly. Donovan also likes to knock things off of tables, turn cups filled with liquid upside down, and "mess up" things by moving them back and forth real fast under his hands. He used to be totally infatuated with strings and

would flick them in front of his face, now he only flicks them in light and doesn't seem to be obsessed with them anymore (which is great, he used to unbraid the hair on his older sisters dolls, tear it out and leave it all over the house and tear up the strings in carpet.> > I often think about his future and fear that my family will never truly be comfortable around him because he requires so much attention and tends to destroy their houses. I fear that as he gets older that, since he is so big (he's only 4 taller than my 5 year old and weights 49 pounds from height and stature, not fat) that his dad and I won't be able to physically handle him like we can now, especially during tantrums.> > I often hear how autistic kids tend to have an area they excel at or have high interest in- I have yet to see what that area might be for Donovan. I hope and pray that he will grow to be

accepted by my family and his peers, communicate with us in some way and stop his aggressive behaviors. I have also heard that stimming is neurodegenerative, so when he tries to stim all the time, I keep thinking that he is ruining his brain or something by doing it.> > It is difficult to say the least, raising four kids that already have health issues like sever eczema and asthma, sleeping issues, etc. then to worry about Donovan all the time and how his future will be is enough to really stress me out. On top of everything else, I go to school full-time, work full-time and never seem to bet sleep. My children's father is a tremendous help, but both of us are exhausted and we often get discouraged at the lack of progress for Donovan.> > I do not want to medicate my son. I have read how often these stimulants and anti-depressants are medicines made for adults, but given to

children in lower doses- with no real un-biased studies of their efficacy in children. I have also seen first hand how children who are on medicines as kids, grow up and stop taking their medicine, and the chemical imbalance is a sort of shock to their system and they act out violently. And that these acts of violence or rage make people think that "they need their medicine" when in fact their body is going through withdrawal.> > I want to snap Donovan into our world naturally and soon, with out causing so much stress on his siblings. (His tantrums make the other kids cry and get scared>)> > I hope someone can relate to my situation and give me some advice on how to help my son. I would also like to know what services your children get through the school district and if you get daily living skills assistance also and if so, how did you get those services.> > Thanks

for taking the time to read my story.> > a Calderon> > > > > > > > ____________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _> This e-mail has been scanned by MCI Managed Email Content Service, using Skeptic technology powered by MessageLabs. For more information on MCI's Managed Email Content Service, visit http://www.mci.com.> ____________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _>

____________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _________ ____This e-mail has been scanned by MCI Managed Email Content Service, using Skeptic technology powered by MessageLabs. For more information on MCI's Managed Email Content Service, visit http://www.mci. com.____________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _________ ________________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _________ ____This e-mail has been scanned by MCI Managed Email Content Service, using Skeptic technology powered by MessageLabs. For more information on MCI's Managed Email Content Service, visit http://www.mci. com.____________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _________

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a,

Thank you for reading my story. I too have had struggles with the bottle with my son but fortunately, two weeks ago that struggle finally ended. My son is 3 in january and I just got him off the bottle completely 2 weeks ago I did only about 2 days before he gave up the fight and excepted that the bottle was not coming back. I think what you need to do is take the bottle away agian as soon as you can (having the kids at someone elses house would probably be a good idea) keep all other bottles for younger children out of his sight at all times and just really try to comfort him with trying to drink from something other than a bottle but you do need to be stern with not giving it back!! Giving it back may allow people to go to sleep now but its not helping in the long run. He has to know the bottle is gone and not coming back. I know its hard believe me I know and I feel for you and your family but with lots of love , patience, and

perciverience I KNOW that you can make it happen. The longer he is on the bottle the harder it will be for everyone. I really hope that you do try agian soon and that you are strong this time. I am here for you. I totally understand. I wish you luck. I hope to hear from you soon! ~

New to Group

Hi Everyone,

My name is a, I am a 24 year old mother of 4 kids aged 4 months (boy), 2 years (girl), 4 years (boy with ASD) and 5 years (girl). My 4 year old son Donovan was diagnosed with Autism when he was 25 months old. He never really spoke as a baby other than mama and dada (with no meaning), but he didn’t start to lose eye contact or start stimming until after he had his 12 month and 18 month vaccinations. I don’t fully believe that these shots caused my son’s autism- but I know they played a role is poisoning his system. Since his diagnosis he has made much less progress than we had hoped. The most progress he has made is regaining eye contact, bringing things he wants opened to us, pushing a chair to climb and get something he wants and sometimes pushing buttons on a communicative device with pictures to say what he wants

every now and then. He is non-verbal with no real functional communication for daily needs and desires. We tried ABA , PECS and signing for the first year and he wouldn’t respond. He throws frequent tantrums, often for no apparent reason. When he gets upset he will sometimes hit at me. Donovan is affectionate though. He will come to me for hugs and kisses and likes to be tickled. But sometimes when giving or receiving affection, he will pinch me or grab and pull my hair all of the sudden- when he does this, he is still smiling and does not seem to understand that he is hurting me. I tell him “no” and I think he understands what no is, but he continues to do this. He has recently pulled my mom’s hair and she was shocked- I never told her that he pulled my hair because my family is already weary to be around him because of the behaviors he exhibits. Donovan also stims all the time.

He stims by flicking his spit with his finders in front of his eyes and especially in streams of indoor and outdoor light. When he stims he gets so excited that he stands on his toes and you can almost feel the excitement and energy building up in him and he says “aaahhhhh” and other vocalizations when stimming. He also gets “overstimulated when he stims and will go from being excited to crying really loudly. Donovan also likes to knock things off of tables, turn cups filled with liquid upside down, and “mess up” things by moving them back and forth real fast under his hands. He used to be totally infatuated with strings and would flick them in front of his face, now he only flicks them in light and doesn’t seem to be obsessed with them anymore (which is great, he used to unbraid the hair on his older sisters dolls, tear it out and leave it all over the house and tear up the strings in carpet.

I often think about his future and fear that my family will never truly be comfortable around him because he requires so much attention and tends to destroy their houses. I fear that as he gets older that, since he is so big (he’s only 4 taller than my 5 year old and weights 49 pounds from height and stature, not fat) that his dad and I won’t be able to physically handle him like we can now, especially during tantrums.

I often hear how autistic kids tend to have an area they excel at or have high interest in- I have yet to see what that area might be for Donovan. I hope and pray that he will grow to be accepted by my family and his peers, communicate with us in some way and stop his aggressive behaviors. I have also heard that stimming is neurodegenerative, so when he tries to stim all the time, I keep thinking that he is ruining his brain or something by doing it.

It is difficult to say the least, raising four kids that already have health issues like sever eczema and asthma, sleeping issues, etc. then to worry about Donovan all the time and how his future will be is enough to really stress me out. On top of everything else, I go to school full-time, work full-time and never seem to bet sleep. My children’s father is a tremendous help, but both of us are exhausted and we often get discouraged at the lack of progress for Donovan.

I do not want to medicate my son. I have read how often these stimulants and anti-depressants are medicines made for adults, but given to children in lower doses- with no real un-biased studies of their efficacy in children. I have also seen first hand how children who are on medicines as kids, grow up and stop taking their medicine, and the chemical imbalance is a sort of shock to their system and they act out violently. And that these acts of violence or rage make people think that “they need their medicine” when in fact their body is going through withdrawal.

I want to snap Donovan into our world naturally and soon, with out causing so much stress on his siblings. (His tantrums make the other kids cry and get scared>)

I hope someone can relate to my situation and give me some advice on how to help my son. I would also like to know what services your children get through the school district and if you get daily living skills assistance also and if so, how did you get those services.

Thanks for taking the time to read my story.

a Calderon

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a,

Thank you for reading my story. I too have had struggles with the bottle with my son but fortunately, two weeks ago that struggle finally ended. My son is 3 in january and I just got him off the bottle completely 2 weeks ago I did only about 2 days before he gave up the fight and excepted that the bottle was not coming back. I think what you need to do is take the bottle away agian as soon as you can (having the kids at someone elses house would probably be a good idea) keep all other bottles for younger children out of his sight at all times and just really try to comfort him with trying to drink from something other than a bottle but you do need to be stern with not giving it back!! Giving it back may allow people to go to sleep now but its not helping in the long run. He has to know the bottle is gone and not coming back. I know its hard believe me I know and I feel for you and your family but with lots of love , patience, and

perciverience I KNOW that you can make it happen. The longer he is on the bottle the harder it will be for everyone. I really hope that you do try agian soon and that you are strong this time. I am here for you. I totally understand. I wish you luck. I hope to hear from you soon! ~

New to Group

Hi Everyone,

My name is a, I am a 24 year old mother of 4 kids aged 4 months (boy), 2 years (girl), 4 years (boy with ASD) and 5 years (girl). My 4 year old son Donovan was diagnosed with Autism when he was 25 months old. He never really spoke as a baby other than mama and dada (with no meaning), but he didn’t start to lose eye contact or start stimming until after he had his 12 month and 18 month vaccinations. I don’t fully believe that these shots caused my son’s autism- but I know they played a role is poisoning his system. Since his diagnosis he has made much less progress than we had hoped. The most progress he has made is regaining eye contact, bringing things he wants opened to us, pushing a chair to climb and get something he wants and sometimes pushing buttons on a communicative device with pictures to say what he wants

every now and then. He is non-verbal with no real functional communication for daily needs and desires. We tried ABA , PECS and signing for the first year and he wouldn’t respond. He throws frequent tantrums, often for no apparent reason. When he gets upset he will sometimes hit at me. Donovan is affectionate though. He will come to me for hugs and kisses and likes to be tickled. But sometimes when giving or receiving affection, he will pinch me or grab and pull my hair all of the sudden- when he does this, he is still smiling and does not seem to understand that he is hurting me. I tell him “no” and I think he understands what no is, but he continues to do this. He has recently pulled my mom’s hair and she was shocked- I never told her that he pulled my hair because my family is already weary to be around him because of the behaviors he exhibits. Donovan also stims all the time.

He stims by flicking his spit with his finders in front of his eyes and especially in streams of indoor and outdoor light. When he stims he gets so excited that he stands on his toes and you can almost feel the excitement and energy building up in him and he says “aaahhhhh” and other vocalizations when stimming. He also gets “overstimulated when he stims and will go from being excited to crying really loudly. Donovan also likes to knock things off of tables, turn cups filled with liquid upside down, and “mess up” things by moving them back and forth real fast under his hands. He used to be totally infatuated with strings and would flick them in front of his face, now he only flicks them in light and doesn’t seem to be obsessed with them anymore (which is great, he used to unbraid the hair on his older sisters dolls, tear it out and leave it all over the house and tear up the strings in carpet.

I often think about his future and fear that my family will never truly be comfortable around him because he requires so much attention and tends to destroy their houses. I fear that as he gets older that, since he is so big (he’s only 4 taller than my 5 year old and weights 49 pounds from height and stature, not fat) that his dad and I won’t be able to physically handle him like we can now, especially during tantrums.

I often hear how autistic kids tend to have an area they excel at or have high interest in- I have yet to see what that area might be for Donovan. I hope and pray that he will grow to be accepted by my family and his peers, communicate with us in some way and stop his aggressive behaviors. I have also heard that stimming is neurodegenerative, so when he tries to stim all the time, I keep thinking that he is ruining his brain or something by doing it.

It is difficult to say the least, raising four kids that already have health issues like sever eczema and asthma, sleeping issues, etc. then to worry about Donovan all the time and how his future will be is enough to really stress me out. On top of everything else, I go to school full-time, work full-time and never seem to bet sleep. My children’s father is a tremendous help, but both of us are exhausted and we often get discouraged at the lack of progress for Donovan.

I do not want to medicate my son. I have read how often these stimulants and anti-depressants are medicines made for adults, but given to children in lower doses- with no real un-biased studies of their efficacy in children. I have also seen first hand how children who are on medicines as kids, grow up and stop taking their medicine, and the chemical imbalance is a sort of shock to their system and they act out violently. And that these acts of violence or rage make people think that “they need their medicine” when in fact their body is going through withdrawal.

I want to snap Donovan into our world naturally and soon, with out causing so much stress on his siblings. (His tantrums make the other kids cry and get scared>)

I hope someone can relate to my situation and give me some advice on how to help my son. I would also like to know what services your children get through the school district and if you get daily living skills assistance also and if so, how did you get those services.

Thanks for taking the time to read my story.

a Calderon

____________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _________ ____This e-mail has been scanned by MCI Managed Email Content Service, using Skeptic technology powered by MessageLabs. For more information on MCI's Managed Email Content Service, visit http://www.mci. com.____________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _________ ____

______________________________________________________________________This e-mail has been scanned by MCI Managed Email Content Service, using Skeptic technology powered by MessageLabs. For more information on MCI's Managed Email Content Service, visit http://www.mci.com.____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________This e-mail has been scanned by MCI Managed Email Content Service, using Skeptic technology powered by MessageLabs. For more information on MCI's Managed Email Content Service, visit http://www.mci.com.______________________________________________________________________

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e,

Thank you, Thank you. I'm sitting here in tears because that was so hard to write. Not just because it isn't popular but because even though it will be 5 years soon just writing about it breaks my heart. More then autism losing devastated my life. I will always miss her, always wonder what if?. Thank you again for your wonderful heart. Kellie>> Hi Everyone,> > My name is a, I am a 24 year old mother of 4 kids aged 4 months (boy), 2 years (girl), 4 years (boy with ASD) and 5 years (girl). My 4 year old son Donovan was diagnosed with Autism when he was 25 months old. He never really spoke as a baby other than mama and dada (with no meaning), but he didn't start to lose eye contact or start stimming until after he had his 12 month and 18 month vaccinations. I don't fully believe that these shots caused my son's autism- but I know they played a role is poisoning his system. Since his diagnosis he has made much less progress than we had hoped. The

most progress he has made is regaining eye contact, bringing things he wants opened to us, pushing a chair to climb and get something he wants and sometimes pushing buttons on a communicative device with pictures to say what he wants every now and then. He is non-verbal with no real functional communication for daily needs and desires. We tried ABA , PECS and signing for the first year and he wouldn't respond. He throws frequent tantrums, often for no apparent reason. When he gets upset he will sometimes hit at me. Donovan is affectionate though. He will come to me for hugs and kisses and likes to be tickled. But sometimes when giving or receiving affection, he will pinch me or grab and pull my hair all of the sudden- when he does this, he is still smiling and does not seem to understand that he is hurting me. I tell him "no" and I think he understands what no is, but he continues to do this. He

has recently pulled my mom's hair and she was shocked- I never told her that he pulled my hair because my family is already weary to be around him because of the behaviors he exhibits. Donovan also stims all the time. He stims by flicking his spit with his finders in front of his eyes and especially in streams of indoor and outdoor light. When he stims he gets so excited that he stands on his toes and you can almost feel the excitement and energy building up in him and he says "aaahhhhh" and other vocalizations when stimming. He also gets "overstimulated when he stims and will go from being excited to crying really loudly. Donovan also likes to knock things off of tables, turn cups filled with liquid upside down, and "mess up" things by moving them back and forth real fast under his hands. He used to be totally infatuated with strings and would flick them in front of his face, now he only flicks

them in light and doesn't seem to be obsessed with them anymore (which is great, he used to unbraid the hair on his older sisters dolls, tear it out and leave it all over the house and tear up the strings in carpet.> > I often think about his future and fear that my family will never truly be comfortable around him because he requires so much attention and tends to destroy their houses. I fear that as he gets older that, since he is so big (he's only 4 taller than my 5 year old and weights 49 pounds from height and stature, not fat) that his dad and I won't be able to physically handle him like we can now, especially during tantrums.> > I often hear how autistic kids tend to have an area they excel at or have high interest in- I have yet to see what that area might be for Donovan. I hope and pray that he will grow to be accepted by my family and his peers, communicate with us in

some way and stop his aggressive behaviors. I have also heard that stimming is neurodegenerative, so when he tries to stim all the time, I keep thinking that he is ruining his brain or something by doing it.> > It is difficult to say the least, raising four kids that already have health issues like sever eczema and asthma, sleeping issues, etc. then to worry about Donovan all the time and how his future will be is enough to really stress me out. On top of everything else, I go to school full-time, work full-time and never seem to bet sleep. My children's father is a tremendous help, but both of us are exhausted and we often get discouraged at the lack of progress for Donovan.> > I do not want to medicate my son. I have read how often these stimulants and anti-depressants are medicines made for adults, but given to children in lower doses- with no real un-biased studies of

their efficacy in children. I have also seen first hand how children who are on medicines as kids, grow up and stop taking their medicine, and the chemical imbalance is a sort of shock to their system and they act out violently. And that these acts of violence or rage make people think that "they need their medicine" when in fact their body is going through withdrawal.> > I want to snap Donovan into our world naturally and soon, with out causing so much stress on his siblings. (His tantrums make the other kids cry and get scared>)> > I hope someone can relate to my situation and give me some advice on how to help my son. I would also like to know what services your children get through the school district and if you get daily living skills assistance also and if so, how did you get those services.> > Thanks for taking the time to read my story.> >

a Calderon> > > > > > > > ____________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _> This e-mail has been scanned by MCI Managed Email Content Service, using Skeptic technology powered by MessageLabs. For more information on MCI's Managed Email Content Service, visit http://www.mci.com.> ____________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _>

____________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _________ ____This e-mail has been scanned by MCI Managed Email Content Service, using Skeptic technology powered by MessageLabs. For more information on MCI's Managed Email Content Service, visit http://www.mci. com.____________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _________ ________________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _________ ____This e-mail has been scanned by MCI Managed Email Content Service, using Skeptic technology powered by MessageLabs. For more information on MCI's Managed Email Content Service, visit http://www.mci. com.____________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _________

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Dear Kellie- I’m so sorry to hear of your

loss. I’m sure your angel is watching over you and your family now and knows

that you love her so much. It sounds like you made the best decision that you

knew of at that time.

The decision to vaccinate is very personal

and should be made by the parents. It is a struggle for many people in the

autism community- it seems that people mostly feel strongly one way or the

other- or they are stuck in between and don’t know what to believe. I hope

that as parents of children with autism that we can unite in that sense and

support each other throughout our struggles.

Take care, Kellie.

a

From:

AutismBehaviorProblems

[mailto:AutismBehaviorProblems ] On Behalf Of Kellie Folkerts

Sent: Wednesday, September 17,

2008 12:15 PM

To:

AutismBehaviorProblems

Subject: Re: Re: New

to Group

e,

Thank you, Thank you. I'm sitting here

in tears because that was so hard to write. Not just because it isn't popular

but because even though it will be 5 years soon just writing about it breaks

my heart. More then autism losing devastated my life. I

will always miss her, always wonder what if?. Thank you

again for your wonderful heart. Kellie

>

> Hi Everyone,

>

> My name is a, I am a 24 year old mother of 4 kids aged 4

months (boy), 2 years (girl), 4 years (boy with ASD) and 5 years

(girl). My 4 year old son Donovan was diagnosed with Autism when he

was 25 months old. He never really spoke as a baby other than mama

and dada (with no meaning), but he didn't start to lose eye contact

or start stimming until after he had his 12 month and 18 month

vaccinations. I don't fully believe that these shots caused my son's

autism- but I know they played a role is poisoning his system. Since

his diagnosis he has made much less progress than we had hoped. The

most progress he has made is regaining eye contact, bringing things

he wants opened to us, pushing a chair to climb and get something he

wants and sometimes pushing buttons on a communicative device with

pictures to say what he wants every now and then. He is non-verbal

with no real functional communication for daily needs and desires.

We tried ABA , PECS and signing for the first year and

he wouldn't

respond. He throws frequent tantrums, often for no apparent reason.

When he gets upset he will sometimes hit at me. Donovan is

affectionate though. He will come to me for hugs and kisses and

likes to be tickled. But sometimes when giving or receiving

affection, he will pinch me or grab and pull my hair all of the

sudden- when he does this, he is still smiling and does not seem to

understand that he is hurting me. I tell him " no " and I think he

understands what no is, but he continues to do this. He has recently

pulled my mom's hair and she was shocked- I never told her that he

pulled my hair because my family is already weary to be around him

because of the behaviors he exhibits. Donovan also stims all the

time. He stims by flicking his spit with his finders in front of his

eyes and especially in streams of indoor and outdoor light. When he

stims he gets so excited that he stands on his toes and you can

almost feel the excitement and energy building up in him and he says

" aaahhhhh " and other vocalizations when stimming. He also gets

" overstimulated when he stims and will go from being excited to

crying really loudly. Donovan also likes to knock things off of

tables, turn cups filled with liquid upside down, and " mess up "

things by moving them back and forth real fast under his hands. He

used to be totally infatuated with strings and would flick them in

front of his face, now he only flicks them in light and doesn't seem

to be obsessed with them anymore (which is great, he used to unbraid

the hair on his older sisters dolls, tear it out and leave it all

over the house and tear up the strings in carpet.

>

> I often think about his future and fear that my family will never

truly be comfortable around him because he requires so much attention

and tends to destroy their houses. I fear that as he gets older

that, since he is so big (he's only 4 taller than my 5 year old and

weights 49 pounds from height and stature, not fat) that his dad and

I won't be able to physically handle him like we can now, especially

during tantrums.

>

> I often hear how autistic kids tend to have an area they excel at

or have high interest in- I have yet to see what that area might be

for Donovan. I hope and pray that he will grow to be accepted by my

family and his peers, communicate with us in some way and stop his

aggressive behaviors. I have also heard that stimming is

neurodegenerative, so when he tries to stim all the time, I keep

thinking that he is ruining his brain or something by doing it.

>

> It is difficult to say the least, raising four kids that already

have health issues like sever eczema and asthma, sleeping issues,

etc. then to worry about Donovan all the time and how his future will

be is enough to really stress me out. On top of everything else, I

go to school full-time, work full-time and never seem to bet sleep.

My children's father is a tremendous help, but both of us are

exhausted and we often get discouraged at the lack of progress for

Donovan.

>

> I do not want to medicate my son. I have read how often these

stimulants and anti-depressants are medicines made for adults, but

given to children in lower doses- with no real un-biased studies of

their efficacy in children. I have also seen first hand how children

who are on medicines as kids, grow up and stop taking their medicine,

and the chemical imbalance is a sort of shock to their system and

they act out violently. And that these acts of violence or rage make

people think that " they need their medicine " when in fact their

body

is going through withdrawal.

>

> I want to snap Donovan into our world naturally and soon, with out

causing so much stress on his siblings. (His tantrums make the other

kids cry and get scared>)

>

> I hope someone can relate to my situation and give me some advice

on how to help my son. I would also like to know what services your

children get through the school district and if you get daily living

skills assistance also and if so, how did you get those services.

>

> Thanks for taking the time to read my story.

>

> a Calderon

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

____________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _

> This e-mail has been scanned by MCI Managed Email Content Service,

using Skeptic technology powered by MessageLabs. For more

information on MCI's Managed Email Content Service, visit http://

www.mci.com.

>

____________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _

>

____________ _________ _________

_________ _________ _________ _________ ____

This e-mail has been scanned by MCI Managed Email Content Service, using

Skeptic technology powered by MessageLabs. For more information on

MCI's Managed Email Content Service, visit http://www.mci. com.

____________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _________

____

____________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _________

____

This e-mail has been scanned by MCI Managed Email Content Service, using

Skeptic technology powered by MessageLabs. For more information on

MCI's Managed Email Content Service, visit http://www.mci. com.

____________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _________

____

______________________________________________________________________

This e-mail has been scanned by MCI Managed Email Content Service, using

Skeptic technology powered by MessageLabs. For more information on MCI's

Managed Email Content Service, visit http://www.mci.com.

______________________________________________________________________

______________________________________________________________________

This e-mail has been scanned by MCI Managed Email Content Service, using Skeptic technology powered by MessageLabs. For more information on MCI's Managed Email Content Service, visit http://www.mci.com.

______________________________________________________________________

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Dear kellie.

I too am very sorry to hear of your daughters passing.I am acually crying alittle myself. it was very sad to read. I don't know what I would do if I lost one of my kids.I am sooo sorry. You've made me so sad. My heart really goes out to you and your family. I wish you and your family all the strength and happiness. If you ever need someone to just pour it all out on I'm here for you and I'm sure others are as well. I have thought about whether I should stop vaccinating my two children or not and have always struggled with the decision but your story has made me believe that my son is the way he is and I wouldn't want to change that ever and that vaccinations are very important whether they MAY OR MAY NOT cause autism in the long run. Please take care of yourself and your beautiful children and know that is always watching you and your family. ~

RE: Re: New to Group

Dear Kellie- I’m so sorry to hear of your loss. I’m sure your angel is watching over you and your family now and knows that you love her so much. It sounds like you made the best decision that you knew of at that time.

The decision to vaccinate is very personal and should be made by the parents.. It is a struggle for many people in the autism community- it seems that people mostly feel strongly one way or the other- or they are stuck in between and don’t know what to believe. I hope that as parents of children with autism that we can unite in that sense and support each other throughout our struggles.

Take care, Kellie.

a

From: AutismBehaviorProblems [mailto:AutismBehaviorProblems ] On Behalf Of Kellie FolkertsSent: Wednesday, September 17, 2008 12:15 PMTo: AutismBehaviorProblems Subject: Re: Re: New to Group

e,

Thank you, Thank you. I'm sitting here in tears because that was so hard to write. Not just because it isn't popular but because even though it will be 5 years soon just writing about it breaks my heart. More then autism losing devastated my life. I will always miss her, always wonder what if?. Thank you again for your wonderful heart. Kellie>> Hi Everyone,> > My name is a, I am a 24 year old mother of 4 kids aged 4 months (boy), 2 years (girl), 4 years (boy with ASD) and 5 years (girl). My 4 year old son Donovan was diagnosed with Autism when he was 25 months old. He never really spoke as a baby other than mama and dada (with no meaning), but he didn't start to lose eye contact or start stimming until after he had his 12 month and 18 month vaccinations. I don't fully believe that these shots caused my son's autism- but I know they played a role is poisoning his system. Since

his diagnosis he has made much less progress than we had hoped. The most progress he has made is regaining eye contact, bringing things he wants opened to us, pushing a chair to climb and get something he wants and sometimes pushing buttons on a communicative device with pictures to say what he wants every now and then. He is non-verbal with no real functional communication for daily needs and desires. We tried ABA , PECS and signing for the first year and he wouldn't respond. He throws frequent tantrums, often for no apparent reason. When he gets upset he will sometimes hit at me. Donovan is affectionate though. He will come to me for hugs and kisses and likes to be tickled. But sometimes when giving or receiving affection, he will pinch me or grab and pull my hair all of the sudden- when he does this, he is still smiling and does not seem to understand that he is hurting me. I tell him "no" and I

think he understands what no is, but he continues to do this. He has recently pulled my mom's hair and she was shocked- I never told her that he pulled my hair because my family is already weary to be around him because of the behaviors he exhibits. Donovan also stims all the time. He stims by flicking his spit with his finders in front of his eyes and especially in streams of indoor and outdoor light. When he stims he gets so excited that he stands on his toes and you can almost feel the excitement and energy building up in him and he says "aaahhhhh" and other vocalizations when stimming. He also gets "overstimulated when he stims and will go from being excited to crying really loudly. Donovan also likes to knock things off of tables, turn cups filled with liquid upside down, and "mess up" things by moving them back and forth real fast under his hands. He used to be totally infatuated with strings

and would flick them in front of his face, now he only flicks them in light and doesn't seem to be obsessed with them anymore (which is great, he used to unbraid the hair on his older sisters dolls, tear it out and leave it all over the house and tear up the strings in carpet.> > I often think about his future and fear that my family will never truly be comfortable around him because he requires so much attention and tends to destroy their houses. I fear that as he gets older that, since he is so big (he's only 4 taller than my 5 year old and weights 49 pounds from height and stature, not fat) that his dad and I won't be able to physically handle him like we can now, especially during tantrums.> > I often hear how autistic kids tend to have an area they excel at or have high interest in- I have yet to see what that area might be for Donovan. I hope and pray that he will grow to

be accepted by my family and his peers, communicate with us in some way and stop his aggressive behaviors. I have also heard that stimming is neurodegenerative, so when he tries to stim all the time, I keep thinking that he is ruining his brain or something by doing it.> > It is difficult to say the least, raising four kids that already have health issues like sever eczema and asthma, sleeping issues, etc. then to worry about Donovan all the time and how his future will be is enough to really stress me out. On top of everything else, I go to school full-time, work full-time and never seem to bet sleep. My children's father is a tremendous help, but both of us are exhausted and we often get discouraged at the lack of progress for Donovan.> > I do not want to medicate my son. I have read how often these stimulants and anti-depressants are medicines made for adults, but given

to children in lower doses- with no real un-biased studies of their efficacy in children. I have also seen first hand how children who are on medicines as kids, grow up and stop taking their medicine, and the chemical imbalance is a sort of shock to their system and they act out violently. And that these acts of violence or rage make people think that "they need their medicine" when in fact their body is going through withdrawal.> > I want to snap Donovan into our world naturally and soon, with out causing so much stress on his siblings. (His tantrums make the other kids cry and get scared>)> > I hope someone can relate to my situation and give me some advice on how to help my son. I would also like to know what services your children get through the school district and if you get daily living skills assistance also and if so, how did you get those services.> >

Thanks for taking the time to read my story.> > a Calderon> > > > > > > > ____________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _> This e-mail has been scanned by MCI Managed Email Content Service, using Skeptic technology powered by MessageLabs. For more information on MCI's Managed Email Content Service, visit http://www.mci.com.> ____________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _>

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My son is now 14 years old and for a very long time I just refused to give in to the fact that he needed to be on medication. It is very difficult to give your child 5 or 6 different medications, but sadly, it is sometimes necessary. Our son couldn't get along without it. I hope that your situation will be different, but just remember that we do whatever we can to help our child, and sometimes that includes giving meds.

Subject: Re: New to GroupTo: AutismBehaviorProblems Date: Tuesday, September 16, 2008, 9:21 PM

Hello a,

My name is , I am a 21 year old mother of two kids aged 1 year-girl and a 2 year old boy. My son also has Autism. Diagnosed at 18 months.My son also spoke as a very young child (about 9 - 11 months ) saying things like mama ,baba dada, sometime with the meaning of the word and other times just to say it. Then very suddenly around his 1st bithday he stopped all words and we noticed how he was always in his own little world and didn't make eye contact and was very affraid of other people. We soon found out why. It was very hard for me still is sometimes. But I was able to move forward and relialize that he was still the same I have aways known and loved and I would love him no matter what. As I'm sure you have.

Your son's symptoms sound alot like my son's as well.... He is a stimmer. He stands on his tippy toes alot when he is excited, he flails his arms and makes very loud vocalizations and yells as well, he also runs back in forth when excited (while yelling ) he is very lovey to us and he is very rough.... he does pull hair sometimes or kick also not on purpose but we are usually able to control his aggresiveness. He is usually a very happy boy but can throw small tantrums here and there. Those are also usually easily nutrealized. is able to express what he needs in a very small manner right now. does some signs...."more" and he has almost conqeured " all done " ,he also is doing well with the PECS system ((( goes to a developmentally disabled pre-school locally 5 days a week for about 3 hours every morning. He recieves ABA style teaching.. He is recieving Speech, Occupational therapy, and one on one

developmental therapy.He has been going for a year in December. It is really doing him good.))) Anyways.... hope i haven't lost you yet...haha has just recently been giving us a few words and sounds! He said "mama "once at school, he has also been saying "mo" for more and using the sign as well as saying the "baba" sound ALOT and saying it here at home and at school "bubbles". ( jason is a big fan of bubbles)

When it comes to our family people are just curios and accepting but get togethers can be hard. I am very sorry to hear that your family is not very accepting and weary of your son.My daughter.... . well she has her up and downs with him. When she was a baby she would get very scared and cry while jason was beeing very over excited and loud but over time she seemed to overcome it and except it. She still can get a litlle fussy sometimes. As for how they get along... most of the time they are together and knows she is there but does not really bother with her and other times they will fight over something and he will try to move her and if she does not move he will shove her causing her to cry for a good 10 minutes sometimes. But most of the time they are nice. I do catch him holding her hand sometimes or trying to hug her, some sort of affection so I know he must love her.

My daughter, andria, also does not talk yet she is 18 months.. I know she is still young so I'm not super worried. She does have a few words and sounds but I think she is too lazy sometimes to say anything. She does say "mama" ,"baba" "yeah" ,and makes the "e "sound but like I said not alot because I think she doesn't have the example from her brother and also being lazy.I am not worried about Autism though . She makes good eye contact and just doesn't have many syptoms. She is very curious of and always wants to do what he is. She definitaly loves him and has grown to be understanding of his loudness and over excitability.

My son has alot of sensory issues... what about your son??? My jason is a very picky eater. Having a very small food selection. All food alike in texture and color, he always wants things in his mouth. We have chewies for him and he still sucks on a binky at nap and bed time. throws little crums and things while eating..... he just doesn't seem to like them I guess. haha.

I also share your feeling with not wanting to medicate your son.. I don't think I ever will. Right now my sons treatment seems to be working.Besides the speech improvements he has regained eye contact and is improving motor skills and so forth. He has also opened up more socially to other people wich I think is the biggest improvement he has made.

I am sorry to hear about your son's treatment not working so well. I am interested in what he is getting right now for help. There were so many alike features in your story to mine and I really hope that we could get to know each other well. I have been hoping to find someone with the same struggles as myself. I wish you the best and I hope to hear from you soon! Thanks for reading... i know it was very long haha.

New to Group

Hi Everyone,

My name is a, I am a 24 year old mother of 4 kids aged 4 months (boy), 2 years (girl), 4 years (boy with ASD) and 5 years (girl). My 4 year old son Donovan was diagnosed with Autism when he was 25 months old. He never really spoke as a baby other than mama and dada (with no meaning), but he didn’t start to lose eye contact or start stimming until after he had his 12 month and 18 month vaccinations. I don’t fully believe that these shots caused my son’s autism- but I know they played a role is poisoning his system. Since his diagnosis he has made much less progress than we had hoped. The most progress he has made is regaining eye contact, bringing things he wants opened to us, pushing a chair to climb and get something he wants and sometimes pushing buttons on a communicative device with pictures to say what he wants

every now and then. He is non-verbal with no real functional communication for daily needs and desires. We tried ABA , PECS and signing for the first year and he wouldn’t respond. He throws frequent tantrums, often for no apparent reason. When he gets upset he will sometimes hit at me. Donovan is affectionate though. He will come to me for hugs and kisses and likes to be tickled. But sometimes when giving or receiving affection, he will pinch me or grab and pull my hair all of the sudden- when he does this, he is still smiling and does not seem to understand that he is hurting me. I tell him “no” and I think he understands what no is, but he continues to do this. He has recently pulled my mom’s hair and she was shocked- I never told her that he pulled my hair because my family is already weary to be around him because of the behaviors he exhibits. Donovan also stims all the time.

He stims by flicking his spit with his finders in front of his eyes and especially in streams of indoor and outdoor light. When he stims he gets so excited that he stands on his toes and you can almost feel the excitement and energy building up in him and he says “aaahhhhh” and other vocalizations when stimming. He also gets “overstimulated when he stims and will go from being excited to crying really loudly. Donovan also likes to knock things off of tables, turn cups filled with liquid upside down, and “mess up” things by moving them back and forth real fast under his hands. He used to be totally infatuated with strings and would flick them in front of his face, now he only flicks them in light and doesn’t seem to be obsessed with them anymore (which is great, he used to unbraid the hair on his older sisters dolls, tear it out and leave it all over the house and tear up the strings in carpet.

I often think about his future and fear that my family will never truly be comfortable around him because he requires so much attention and tends to destroy their houses. I fear that as he gets older that, since he is so big (he’s only 4 taller than my 5 year old and weights 49 pounds from height and stature, not fat) that his dad and I won’t be able to physically handle him like we can now, especially during tantrums.

I often hear how autistic kids tend to have an area they excel at or have high interest in- I have yet to see what that area might be for Donovan. I hope and pray that he will grow to be accepted by my family and his peers, communicate with us in some way and stop his aggressive behaviors. I have also heard that stimming is neurodegenerative, so when he tries to stim all the time, I keep thinking that he is ruining his brain or something by doing it.

It is difficult to say the least, raising four kids that already have health issues like sever eczema and asthma, sleeping issues, etc. then to worry about Donovan all the time and how his future will be is enough to really stress me out. On top of everything else, I go to school full-time, work full-time and never seem to bet sleep. My children’s father is a tremendous help, but both of us are exhausted and we often get discouraged at the lack of progress for Donovan.

I do not want to medicate my son. I have read how often these stimulants and anti-depressants are medicines made for adults, but given to children in lower doses- with no real un-biased studies of their efficacy in children. I have also seen first hand how children who are on medicines as kids, grow up and stop taking their medicine, and the chemical imbalance is a sort of shock to their system and they act out violently. And that these acts of violence or rage make people think that “they need their medicine” when in fact their body is going through withdrawal.

I want to snap Donovan into our world naturally and soon, with out causing so much stress on his siblings. (His tantrums make the other kids cry and get scared>)

I hope someone can relate to my situation and give me some advice on how to help my son. I would also like to know what services your children get through the school district and if you get daily living skills assistance also and if so, how did you get those services.

Thanks for taking the time to read my story.

a Calderon

____________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _________ ____This e-mail has been scanned by MCI Managed Email Content Service, using Skeptic technology powered by MessageLabs. For more information on MCI's Managed Email Content Service, visit http://www.mci. com.____________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _________ ____

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Hi Susie, I appreciate your insight. Just

like vaccinating, I believe that medicating should be personal, informed choice

that should be made by the parents.

a

From: AutismBehaviorProblems

[mailto:AutismBehaviorProblems ] On Behalf Of Susie Mattern

Sent: Wednesday, September 17,

2008 1:02 PM

To:

AutismBehaviorProblems

Subject: Re: New to

Group

My son is now 14 years old and for a very long time

I just refused to give in to the fact that he needed to be on medication. It

is very difficult to give your child 5 or 6 different medications, but sadly,

it is sometimes necessary. Our son couldn't get along without it. I hope that

your situation will be different, but just remember that we do whatever we

can to help our child, and sometimes that includes giving meds.

From: Tibbetts

<tibbeysgirl26>

Subject: Re: New to Group

To: AutismBehaviorProblems

Date: Tuesday, September 16, 2008, 9:21 PM

Hello a,

My name is ,

I am a 21 year old mother of two kids aged 1 year-girl and a 2 year old boy.

My son also has Autism. Diagnosed at 18 months.My son also spoke as a very

young child (about 9 - 11 months ) saying things like mama ,baba dada,

sometime with the meaning of the word and other times just to say it. Then

very suddenly around his 1st bithday he stopped all words and we noticed how

he was always in his own little world and didn't make eye contact and was

very affraid of other people. We soon found out why. It was very hard for me

still is sometimes. But I was able to move forward and relialize that he was

still the same I have aways known and loved and I would love him no

matter what. As I'm sure you have.

Your son's symptoms sound

alot like my son's as well.... He is a stimmer. He stands on his tippy toes

alot when he is excited, he flails his arms and makes very loud vocalizations

and yells as well, he also runs back in forth when excited (while yelling )

he is very lovey to us and he is very rough.... he does pull hair sometimes

or kick also not on purpose but we are usually able to control his

aggresiveness. He is usually a very happy boy but can throw small tantrums

here and there. Those are also usually easily nutrealized. is able to

express what he needs in a very small manner right now. does some

signs.... " more " and he has almost conqeured " all done "

,he also is doing well with the PECS

system ((( goes to a developmentally disabled pre-school locally

5 days a week for about 3 hours every morning. He recieves ABA style teaching.. He is recieving

Speech, Occupational therapy, and one on one developmental therapy.He has

been going for a year in December. It is really doing him good.)))

Anyways.... hope i haven't lost you yet...haha has just recently

been giving us a few words and sounds! He said " mama " once at

school, he has also been saying " mo " for more and using the

sign as well as saying the " baba " sound ALOT and saying it here at

home and at school " bubbles " . ( jason is a big fan of bubbles)

When it comes to our family people

are just curios and accepting but get togethers can be hard. I am very sorry

to hear that your family is not very accepting and weary of your son.My

daughter.... . well she has her up and downs with him. When she was a baby

she would get very scared and cry while jason was beeing very over excited

and loud but over time she seemed to overcome it and except it. She still can

get a litlle fussy sometimes. As for how they get along... most of the time

they are together and knows she is there but does not really bother

with her and other times they will fight over something and he will try to

move her and if she does not move he will shove her causing her to cry for a

good 10 minutes sometimes. But most of the time they are nice. I do catch him

holding her hand sometimes or trying to hug her, some sort of affection

so I know he must love her.

My daughter, andria, also does

not talk yet she is 18 months.. I know she is still young so I'm not

super worried. She does have a few words and sounds but I think she

is too lazy sometimes to say anything. She does say " mama "

, " baba " " yeah " ,and makes the " e " sound but

like I said not alot because I think she doesn't have the

example from her brother and also being lazy.I am not worried about Autism

though . She makes good eye contact and just doesn't have many syptoms. She

is very curious of and always wants to do what he is. She definitaly

loves him and has grown to be understanding of his loudness and over

excitability.

My son has alot of sensory

issues... what about your son??? My jason is a very picky eater. Having a

very small food selection. All food alike in texture and color, he always

wants things in his mouth. We have chewies for him and he still sucks on a

binky at nap and bed time. throws little crums and things while

eating..... he just doesn't seem to like them I guess. haha.

I also share your

feeling with not wanting to medicate your son.. I don't think I ever

will. Right now my sons treatment seems to be working.Besides the speech

improvements he has regained eye contact and is improving motor skills and so

forth. He has also opened up more socially to other people wich I think is

the biggest improvement he has made.

I am sorry to hear about

your son's treatment not working so well. I am interested in what he is

getting right now for help. There were so many alike features in your story

to mine and I really hope that we could get to know each other well. I have

been hoping to find someone with the same struggles as myself. I wish you the

best and I hope to hear from you soon! Thanks for reading... i know it

was very long haha.

New to Group

Hi

Everyone,

My name is

a, I am a 24 year old mother of 4 kids aged 4 months (boy), 2 years

(girl), 4 years (boy with ASD) and 5 years (girl). My 4 year old

son Donovan was diagnosed with Autism when he was 25 months old. He

never really spoke as a baby other than mama and dada (with no meaning), but

he didn’t start to lose eye contact or start stimming until after he had his

12 month and 18 month vaccinations. I don’t fully believe that these

shots caused my son’s autism- but I know they played a role is poisoning his

system. Since his diagnosis he has made much less progress than we had

hoped. The most progress he has made is regaining eye contact, bringing

things he wants opened to us, pushing a chair to climb and get something he

wants and sometimes pushing buttons on a communicative device with pictures

to say what he wants every now and then. He is non-verbal with no real

functional communication for daily needs and desires. We tried ABA , PECS

and signing for the first year and he wouldn’t respond. He throws

frequent tantrums, often for no apparent reason. When he gets upset he

will sometimes hit at me. Donovan is affectionate though. He will

come to me for hugs and kisses and likes to be tickled. But sometimes

when giving or receiving affection, he will pinch me or grab and pull my hair

all of the sudden- when he does this, he is still smiling and does not seem

to understand that he is hurting me. I tell him “no” and I think he

understands what no is, but he continues to do this. He has recently

pulled my mom’s hair and she was shocked- I never told her that he pulled my

hair because my family is already weary to be around him because of the

behaviors he exhibits. Donovan also stims all the time. He stims

by flicking his spit with his finders in front of his eyes and especially in

streams of indoor and outdoor light. When he stims he gets so excited

that he stands on his toes and you can almost feel the excitement and energy

building up in him and he says “aaahhhhh” and other vocalizations when

stimming. He also gets “overstimulated when he stims and will go from

being excited to crying really loudly. Donovan also likes to knock

things off of tables, turn cups filled with liquid upside down, and “mess up”

things by moving them back and forth real fast under his hands. He used

to be totally infatuated with strings and would flick them in front of his

face, now he only flicks them in light and doesn’t seem to be obsessed with

them anymore (which is great, he used to unbraid the hair on his older

sisters dolls, tear it out and leave it all over the house and tear up the

strings in carpet.

I often

think about his future and fear that my family will never truly be

comfortable around him because he requires so much attention and tends to

destroy their houses. I fear that as he gets older that, since he is so

big (he’s only 4 taller than my 5 year old and weights 49 pounds from height

and stature, not fat) that his dad and I won’t be able to physically handle

him like we can now, especially during tantrums.

I often

hear how autistic kids tend to have an area they excel at or have high

interest in- I have yet to see what that area might be for Donovan. I

hope and pray that he will grow to be accepted by my family and his peers,

communicate with us in some way and stop his aggressive behaviors. I

have also heard that stimming is neurodegenerative, so when he tries to stim

all the time, I keep thinking that he is ruining his brain or something by

doing it.

It is

difficult to say the least, raising four kids that already have health issues

like sever eczema and asthma, sleeping issues, etc. then to worry about

Donovan all the time and how his future will be is enough to really stress me

out. On top of everything else, I go to school full-time, work

full-time and never seem to bet sleep. My children’s father is a

tremendous help, but both of us are exhausted and we often get discouraged at

the lack of progress for Donovan.

I do not

want to medicate my son. I have read how often these stimulants and

anti-depressants are medicines made for adults, but given to children in

lower doses- with no real un-biased studies of their efficacy in

children. I have also seen first hand how children who are on medicines

as kids, grow up and stop taking their medicine, and the chemical imbalance

is a sort of shock to their system and they act out violently. And that

these acts of violence or rage make people think that “they need their

medicine” when in fact their body is going through withdrawal.

I want to

snap Donovan into our world naturally and soon, with out causing so much

stress on his siblings. (His tantrums make the other kids cry and get

scared>)

I hope

someone can relate to my situation and give me some advice on how to help my

son. I would also like to know what services your children get through

the school district and if you get daily living skills assistance also and if

so, how did you get those services.

Thanks for

taking the time to read my story.

a Calderon

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This e-mail has been scanned by MCI Managed Email Content Service, using

Skeptic technology powered by MessageLabs. For more information on MCI's

Managed Email Content Service, visit http://www.mci. com.

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______________________________________________________________________

This e-mail has been scanned by MCI Managed Email Content Service, using

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Managed Email Content Service, visit http://www.mci.com.

______________________________________________________________________

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a,

First sorry for misspelling your name. used to stim a lot with wheels and lining up toys when he was younger and we would use redirection. If he was playing with the wheels on a truck I would turn in over and do something else I knew he liked with the truck like crashing the 2 cars together. At first this was very difficult because he was constantly stimming and it seemed like I couldn't get anything else done but eventually it got better. I also tried to use the things he was interested in to encourage language. We used to line up all his favorite toys on the fireplace mantle and we used velcro to line up pictures where he could reach them. If he wanted the toy he had to give me the correct picture, I would then label it (you want truck) and give him the toy. Eventually he was able to ask without the card first just truck and then I want truck. Now he is interested in making things with play doh

and he loves to look at videos of elevators on the computer. We use the play doh as a reinforcer- when homework is done he can play with play doh or use the computer. He now has post intensive therapy at home as well as all day school. We usually have 9 hours a week of therapy which is divided between community trips(working on his behaviors in public) and working on specific skills ( reading, math, emotions etc.) It is still somewhat ABA based but not true ABA. I hope this helps some. I know you are doing your very best with your little guy and his light will shine on and on..... Kellie

Hi ,

I really understand what you are going through. My son started therapy before he was 2 and nothing really happened. The therapists and I worked with him one on one 20 -30 hours a week with ABA , PECS , speech and OT. He just didn't seem to have any idea what we wanted and would get frustrated and angry. He couldn't even do an NVI (Non Verbal Imitation). You would touch your nose and say do this and he would just look at you blankly- You would hand over hand him and give him a reward and the next time the same response!! It was so frustrating. This went on for almost a year. Then one day he looked at us and got it! He smiled touched his nose and mastered the complete program in 3 weeks. It was like a light bulb went on in his head- OH that's what you want!! After that he did much better in therapy and

now he is 8 and has some language (wants,needs, some commenting), he is doing well in a 2nd grade class with an aid. For the most part he is pretty happy. We had a lot of behavioral problems this summer but we put him on Adderall to help him concentrate, and 2.5mg of Prozac to help him calm easier. This is something I fought for a very long time but what a difference it makes for him. He doesn't want to feel so frustrated all the time and the Adderall helps him concentrate on his school work and on what we say to him. He is a much happier kid and you can tell he feels much more successful in school and at home. He even claps when the school bus pulls up!! At the end of last year he was hiding his shoes in the morning so he couldn't go to school. I guess I'm trying to say sometimes it takes a little longer to get them going but don't get to discouraged the light bulb will go on.

Kellie

____________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _________ ____This e-mail has been scanned by MCI Managed Email Content Service, using Skeptic technology powered by MessageLabs. For more information on MCI's Managed Email Content Service, visit http://www.mci. com.____________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _________ ________________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _________ ____This e-mail has been scanned by MCI Managed Email Content Service, using Skeptic technology powered by MessageLabs. For more information on MCI's Managed Email Content Service, visit http://www.mci. com.____________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _________ ____

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Gosh Kellie! How hard. I am so very sorry. How sad!

Stacie B

Aurora IL

Hi ,

I know what I'm about to say isn't going to be popular but I have to say it. I'm not trying to scare anyone or change anyones mind on anything but groups are about sharing your personal experience and I really feel the need to share this with you all. was 2 and we had just started seeing a DAN doctor. My daughter had just been born and he recommended no vaccines for her. We were (and still are) very afraid of having another autistic child so we didn't give her any. When she was 10 months I asked about giving her some on a different schedule(not so many at one time) and he said yes when she was 2 we would start them. On Dec. 8 2003 I put to bed she was fine and the next morning she was gone. She had contracted Strep which turned into meningitis and it went so quickly it only took hours from onset to death. We will always regret not having her vaccinated and we can't take it back. Our daughter Paige was born in 2005 and we had her vaccinated at a slower rate. I'm really not trying to scare anyone. I just needed to tell you what we have experienced. Kellie>> Hi Everyone,> > My name is a, I am a 24 year old mother of 4 kids aged 4 months (boy), 2 years (girl), 4 years (boy with ASD) and 5 years (girl). My 4 year old son Donovan was diagnosed with Autism when he was 25 months old. He never really spoke as a baby other than mama and dada (with no meaning), but he didn't start to lose eye contact or start stimming until after he had his 12 month and 18 month vaccinations. I don't fully believe that these shots caused my son's autism- but I know they played a role is poisoning his system. Since his diagnosis he has made much less progress than we had hoped. The most progress he has made is regaining eye contact, bringing things he wants opened to us, pushing a chair to climb and get something he wants and sometimes pushing buttons on a communicative device with pictures to say what he wants every now and then. He is non-verbal with no real functional communication for daily needs and desires. We tried ABA , PECS and signing for the first year and he wouldn't respond. He throws frequent tantrums, often for no apparent reason. When he gets upset he will sometimes hit at me. Donovan is affectionate though. He will come to me for hugs and kisses and likes to be tickled. But sometimes when giving or receiving affection, he will pinch me or grab and pull my hair all of the sudden- when he does this, he is still smiling and does not seem to understand that he is hurting me. I tell him "no" and I think he understands what no is, but he continues to do this. He has recently pulled my mom's hair and she was shocked- I never told her that he pulled my hair because my family is already weary to be around him because of the behaviors he exhibits. Donovan also stims all the time. He stims by flicking his spit with his finders in front of his eyes and especially in streams of indoor and outdoor light. When he stims he gets so excited that he stands on his toes and you can almost feel the excitement and energy building up in him and he says "aaahhhhh" and other vocalizations when stimming. He also gets "overstimulated when he stims and will go from being excited to crying really loudly. Donovan also likes to knock things off of tables, turn cups filled with liquid upside down, and "mess up" things by moving them back and forth real fast under his hands. He used to be totally infatuated with strings and would flick them in front of his face, now he only flicks them in light and doesn't seem to be obsessed with them anymore (which is great, he used to unbraid the hair on his older sisters dolls, tear it out and leave it all over the house and tear up the strings in carpet.> > I often think about his future and fear that my family will never truly be comfortable around him because he requires so much attention and tends to destroy their houses. I fear that as he gets older that, since he is so big (he's only 4 taller than my 5 year old and weights 49 pounds from height and stature, not fat) that his dad and I won't be able to physically handle him like we can now, especially during tantrums.> > I often hear how autistic kids tend to have an area they excel at or have high interest in- I have yet to see what that area might be for Donovan. I hope and pray that he will grow to be accepted by my family and his peers, communicate with us in some way and stop his aggressive behaviors. I have also heard that stimming is neurodegenerative, so when he tries to stim all the time, I keep thinking that he is ruining his brain or something by doing it.> > It is difficult to say the least, raising four kids that already have health issues like sever eczema and asthma, sleeping issues, etc. then to worry about Donovan all the time and how his future will be is enough to really stress me out. On top of everything else, I go to school full-time, work full-time and never seem to bet sleep. My children's father is a tremendous help, but both of us are exhausted and we often get discouraged at the lack of progress for Donovan.> > I do not want to medicate my son. I have read how often these stimulants and anti-depressants are medicines made for adults, but given to children in lower doses- with no real un-biased studies of their efficacy in children. I have also seen first hand how children who are on medicines as kids, grow up and stop taking their medicine, and the chemical imbalance is a sort of shock to their system and they act out violently. And that these acts of violence or rage make people think that "they need their medicine" when in fact their body is going through withdrawal.> > I want to snap Donovan into our world naturally and soon, with out causing so much stress on his siblings. (His tantrums make the other kids cry and get scared>)> > I hope someone can relate to my situation and give me some advice on how to help my son. I would also like to know what services your children get through the school district and if you get daily living skills assistance also and if so, how did you get those services.> > Thanks for taking the time to read my story.> > a Calderon> > > > > > > > ____________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _> This e-mail has been scanned by MCI Managed Email Content Service, using Skeptic technology powered by MessageLabs. For more information on MCI's Managed Email Content Service, visit http://www.mci.com.> ____________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _>

____________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _________ ____This e-mail has been scanned by MCI Managed Email Content Service, using Skeptic technology powered by MessageLabs. For more information on MCI's Managed Email Content Service, visit http://www.mci. com.____________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _________ ________________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _________ ____This e-mail has been scanned by MCI Managed Email Content Service, using Skeptic technology powered by MessageLabs. For more information on MCI's Managed Email Content Service, visit http://www.mci. com.____________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _________ ____ Psssst...Have you heard the news? There's a new fashion blog, plus the latest fall trends and hair styles at StyleList.com.

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