RE: Re: Sound sources

[Guest guest]

I never thought of it that way, but you are right. Its only people-noises that bother me. And so my anxiety is always coupled with anger for other people. That's one of the hardest things about having 4S - I find myself so deeply angry at the noisy people (family members) in my life. Like I can't be near my step dad because of the noises (heavy breathing) even though other than his breathing he is a very nice person.

YES. Not sure why that is. I think that it is because we know the

sound is temporary, that a task is being performed and that it will

most likely be over soon. Now if I had to listen to the drill day in

and day out all day long, it would probably start to freak me out. It

seems to be something about the PERSON making the sound who is usually

nervous, bored or in hyper mode. Something about the fear of having to

listen to it over and over again for an undetermined period of time is

what seems to send me from 0 to wacko immediately. To me its like they

are trying to get attention by making the sound. They know they are

doing it, but when you call them on it they kind of give you a stupid

grin and then go back to doing it, and will make all kinds of excuses

for making the noise, like it calms them down, or they are " really not

aware " that they were doing it. Most loud sounds hurt my ears and

startle the heck out of me, but they are short lived and I agree, I

would prefer to have my ears drums hurt for a second, than to go

insane sitting next to a clicky person any day. It's along the lines

water torture. Clicking torture. gaahhh!!!!!

> >

> > I noticed something about my 4S and was wondering if anyone else

had a

> > similar experience. I am only bothered by sounds that are made my

> > people...similar sounds made by objects do not bother me. For

> > instance, people sniffing their nose drives me crazy. However, a

> > ripping sheet of paper, which has almost exactly the same noise,

> > doesn't bother me. I've sometimes whipped around to angrily glare at

> > someone who I thought was sniffing, only to see them tearing apart a

> > piece of paper, and then I relaxed.

> >

> > I tried to use that as treatment, by pretending that sniffing

noises I

> > was hearing were actually just people riping up bits of paper, but it

> > didn't work. I need to know it isn't a person making the noise...I

> > have to see with my eyes what is going on before anxiety kicks in.

> >

> > Anyway, I was curious if this was something other people noticed.

> >

>

-- amanda m. steinbergamanda.steinberg@...aim: amandamsteinberg

[Guest guest]

"I think that it is because we know the sound is temporary"So funny you mention that -- I work for a public institution. For some reason, this means that the cleaning is done in the morning rather than after hours, which by itself doesn't bother me. However, the woman who does said cleaning clicks her gum every two seconds -- so loudly it can be heard over the vacuum. She's a perfectly nice person, but when I see her coming, I want to get away as fast as possible. I've mentioned this to a coworker/friend, and her responses were 1. It didn't bother her because she doesn't really notice the sounds, of course, and 2. When she does notice, she knows that they're only temporary, that eventually Poppy will be done and will go away. She's not the first person who's said that to me. Maybe should rev up a power drill every time somone popped, clicked, sniffled or smacked. daogress wrote: YES. Not sure why that is. I think that it is because we know the sound is temporary, that a task is being performed and that it will most likely be over soon. Now if I had to listen to the drill day in and day out all day long, it would probably start to freak me out. It seems to be something about the PERSON making the sound who is usually nervous, bored or in hyper mode. Something about the fear of having to listen to it over and over again for an undetermined period of time is what seems to send me from 0 to wacko immediately. To me its like

they are trying to get attention by making the sound. They know they are doing it, but when you call them on it they kind of give you a stupid grin and then go back to doing it, and will make all kinds of excuses for making the noise, like it calms them down, or they are "really not aware" that they were doing it. Most loud sounds hurt my ears and startle the heck out of me, but they are short lived and I agree, I would prefer to have my ears drums hurt for a second, than to go insane sitting next to a clicky person any day. It's along the lines water torture. Clicking torture. gaahhh!!!!! > > > > I noticed something about my 4S and was wondering if anyone else had a > > similar experience. I am only bothered by sounds that are made my > > people...similar sounds made by objects do not bother me. For > > instance, people sniffing their nose drives me crazy. However, a > > ripping sheet of paper, which has almost exactly the same noise, > > doesn't bother me. I've sometimes whipped around to angrily glare at > > someone who I thought was sniffing, only to see them tearing apart a > > piece of paper, and then I relaxed. > > > > I tried to use that as treatment, by pretending that sniffing noises I > > was hearing were actually just people riping up bits of

paper, but it > > didn't work. I need to know it isn't a person making the noise...I > > have to see with my eyes what is going on before anxiety kicks in. > > > > Anyway, I was curious if this was something other people noticed. > > > __________________________________________________

[Guest guest]

Hi

Marsha,

Just

got around to reading this. I’ve been knitting for Christmas...

The

image of an obnoxious conjoined twin is permanently stuck in my brain now.

Of

all the images you provided, that is the one I just cant forget. Like a

conjoined twin...it has been there forever. It just takes a while to develop. When

your twin was a baby...even when you were toddlers, you didn’t have all

these problems. But now, life is more complex. And, you’re at an age

where you can verbalize your feelings.

This

scenario also addresses the issue of control...or lack thereof. They want go

left, you want go right. They want wear jeans, you want wear a skirt. They are

always hot, you are always cold. They want to listen to Ludacris...you want to

listen to ny Cash. There is an endless combination of things that you

could describe that would seem trivial to other people, but could potentially

drive each of you insane. I could see my mother telling me and said twin to

knock it off! But, we know...it’s not quite that simple. This is between

US...it has nothing to do with her...lol.

4S

really does have a personality of its own. I know that there are times I don't recognize

myself because I am so angry. I feel like I have to make that other person calm

down so that we don't get ourselves into trouble...or accidently hurt someone’s

feelings. And when the sound is over, I’m angry at the part of me that

was sooo angry. Why cant she just be normal!!!

You

never know what is going to trigger 4S...until it triggers it. Just like you didn’t

know you hated Uggs until your twin insisted on having a pair.

I’m

sure you did not take your analogy as far as I did, and there is a good chance

that my interpretation is missing the depth you intended, but I will now permanently

feel that my 4S is the silly twin I’m gonna have to just put up with.

Don't

tell her, but I’m the dominant twin...(I’m the pretty one too J)

Shon

K!

From:

Soundsensitivity [mailto:Soundsensitivity ] On

Behalf Of anthro_pop

Sent: Thursday, December 14, 2006 12:33 AM

To: Soundsensitivity

Subject: Re: Sound sources

-----------HI :

This is such a good question, however, I would use logic to try to

define the difference between psychologic and physiologic. What do

you think?

Is the measles psychologic? Hardly anyone would agree with that. How

about an ulcer? Is it a psychologic condition? Well, if we open you

up, there will be a bloody lesion in your gut, that is clearly

physical, but how is it connected with stress? Is stress

psychological? Well maybe, someone can make you feel very bad if they

are mean or rude to you, purposefully, but what happens in the body

and brain? Are there actual physiologic changes associated with

depression, mood swings, feeling bad or sad? Clearly particular

proteins are released when we cry, that is a physiologic sign,

however, what makes us cry? Someone 'hurt' our feelings?

Are feelings psychological or physiologic or a combination? When

someone compliments us, we turn pink, we glow, we radiate happiness,

we retaliate with warmth and good feelings........our hands and feet

actually increase in temperature, our hearts beat a little faster, we

produce happy hormones......

The fact is, we cannot separate our minds and bodies. That is an

error of science. WE can think, and those thoughts are really

translated instantly into complex bio-chemical changes. Even our

intentions, without action, produce changes in blood flow, sugar

uptake, electical current, and metabolic processes.

How can we decide? Let us consider the innocent 9 year old. Why does

this young child, busy with playing, suddenly decide to become

psychologically impaired and develop 4 S? Do you imagine that is the

first thing that comes to a child when they are thwarted or unhappy to

mistreated......not at all. Most children cry, go to sleep, even run

away from home, or hit out, but they rarely suddenly develop a very

unusual shift in sensory perception. That would be like a child who

is going along fine and then suddenly loses sensation in three of five

fingers on each hand. From stress or mental or emotional concerns.

Hmmm.

If we do have physiologic changes, though, does this mean we are

immune to feeling-thinking changes? Or psychological ones? If I have

an accident, and my nose is cut off, do I develop anxiety and concern

and emotional problems when I go out into public and people stare at

me? Of course. Yes, we can develop quite strong feelings about the

way things are in our bodies or brains, our weaknesses and our

strengths!

We are multi faceted and I will propose that our physical and

psychological bodies are, indeed, one. Not two. Intertwined, co-

dependent, united, one. Not opposing forces, or somehow a two-ness.

Can we develop conditioned responses? Of course or we would be dead.

When the snake bites once, we watch the damn thing forever more. Keep

it away!

When the sound pricks us, needles us, tortures us, we watch for it, oh

very yes, like a rattlesnake, we watch for it, and prepare and

anticipate and try to stay away from the stony dry hills where those

nasty reptiles reside.

Because we are sentient intelligent beings. Not stones. We can think

with our heads and hearts and we feel so bad when the trigger person

is a loved one, and yet, the 4S person is not Choosing this, not at

all.

ANd so, you see, I am firmly convinced by the children. Children do

not lie about this or need to develop some weird psychological thing

that NO ONE has ever heard of, or told them about, or seen. They do

not. And yet, I receive, each week, 1 to 3 letters from parents of

young children who have 4 S.

ANd for some of you, many of you, it does not go away or shift

necessarily. It just becomes part of the fabric of your lives, and

like living with an unwanted Siamese twin, you are co-joined to it so

closely, that it seems as if it had been there forever.

But if you think back, you might remember those pre 4 S days, and know

that this was NOT a voluntary or invoked emotional response, bu more

like a case of BRAIN measles..........not your fault, not your doing,

not your responsibility.

A glitch in the system.

A physical problem with psychological overlay. Reasonable supportable

overlay.

Marsha , M. S., CCC-A

FAAA

> I'm starting to wonder if 4S isn't a lot more psychological than

Marsha

> has said in the past. Marsha, you suggested that we explain to

people

> that 4S is physiological in nature. How much of 4S would you say is

> physiological... and how much psychological?

>

>