(No subject)

[Guest guest]

When I was in school I HAD to sit in the front because I was so

affected by peoples movements too. I would block the people out with my

hair if they were next to me or I'd lean with my elbow on the desk and

my hand blocking that side of my face that they were on. If I had to

sit behind anyone I would go nuts If they were shaking their

foot,twirling their hair or making other repetitive movements. I

couldn't focus on anything else or do anything but stare at them until

they stopped. After they stopped I would look away and then try not to

catch a glance of it again so I could avoid fixating on it. The big

problem with that is I also could hear them shaking their leg or biting

their pens and all of the other trigger noises and go completely nuts

over that too.

At home My dads girlfriend would get her dinner and eat it in the

livingroom. she'd put her feet up on the ottoman and while she was

eating she would move her pinky toes in and out furiously. She ate very

loudly and seemed to really enjoy every bite like she was about to have

an orgasm over it!!! I would pray for her to hurry and finish before I

went crazy. It made me hate her. It's like I felt like she was just

torturing me. I remember my grandma would take us to mcdonalds a lot

and while waiting in the drive through she would hold her money in one

hand and rub it between her fingers until we reached the pay window.the

crinkling of a fresh dollar is terrible. The NOISE was maddening. The

most irritating person in my life is my dad. My dad has the worst

habits I've ever seen. I counted him eating 4 hotdogs in a five minute

time span. He talks with his mouth full and food flies out. When we're

sitting on the couch (which I can hardly do, I prefer the table so I

cant see his feet moving)he rubs his feet across the carpet while he's

talking then lifts both feet up and twirls his feet around in circles.

He does these two movements over and over. I want to scream! When I was

younger I would run up and grab his feet. Now that I'm grown I have to

be mature and endure it. My dad said I was neurotic and controlling. I

dont feel like there are many people who can relate to these feelings,

even on here I dont think too many people are bothered by peoples

movements. I feel like it's a double whammy. If I get the movements

blocked from my vision there is always the noise. If I block the noise

there are always the movements. I cant go anywhere without being

bothered by something or someone. It's hard to rate the intensity of

someone else's pain and I dont think other people could ever truly

understand how this feels to us. I feel like such a whiner sometimes

because I'm so fortunate to have sight and sound, I wish I could always

be positive and realize how lucky I am for that, but