New member

[Guest guest]

Awww dang Lynn,

 I wish I could hug ya. Your story is almost exactly like mine w/ my sister Lee.

She passed away last Dec. 31.

 I feel so bad for you but at the same time you're almost like a sister. We went

thru the same things with Lee. I'm so sorry you're going thru this. (((((((((

many warm hugs)))))

 Our mom got bone cancer last yr. Lee lived next door to my parents & while Mom

was dying ( we had hospice at home) I caught her stealing Hummel figurines from

Mom's room. WHILE MOM WAS LAYING THERE. We had to change the locks on the folks

house. I was afraid she'd harm them. She also made life VERY STRESSFUL with her

encephalopathy.( we did let her see Mom whenever she wanted, but only w/

supervision)

  & YES, even when we busted her red handed. DENIAL DENIAL DENIAL ! It's part of

the illness, addiction to alcohol & drugs. They get so good at denial, they

believe it themselves!

 She also REFUSED to admit that she was sick. SHE WAS FINE ! I'm telling you all

this so you know I understand what you're going thru.

 At this point, you need to protect yourself & your family. I'd feel NO GUILT. I

had to stay away from Lee too. After Mom passed, I couldn't take more stress. I

had to take care of myself & my family.

 I don't know what state you're in but I called the state social workers here in

MN. Do a google search for your states website. Look for elderly & disabled

phone #s.

 They had alot of good advice & options. They might be able to take your brother

out of your folks house & put him into a care facility. I know it sounds cruel,

but you'd be doing your bro & your folks a HUGE favor.

 Your bro isn't getting good medical care if he isn't thinking right ( therefore

not taking his meds right or eating right ect).

 He might be verbally abusing your folks. Not to mention the stress on them.

 Lee stayed in denial till the end too. She refused to sign anything or make any

arrangements.

 I'm so sorry honey but your brother doesn't have much chance if he won't admit

to his illness & get the help he needs.

 Lee lasted a little over a yr after her dx of end stage liver disease.  The

docs gave her 6 mnths to a yr. But with this illness, it's VERY hard to tell, he

could do well, he might not.

 Meanwhile she forced my father into dept. Cost him over 100 thousand dollars &

TONS of stress. He's still recovering 8 mnths later. I know you don't want your

folks going thru THAT.

 Please, try to find your bro some help. Lee would have done better if she'd

been in a place where they could take care of her. Instead, she died alone,

earlier then she needed to.( dang, I'm crying for you all)

 I have to leave now, my son was married last night & we're going to go see what

'' loot' they got LOL!

 I'll be here for you, you have a new friend who's been thru the same thing. If

you want me :-) You can email me or the group anytime, I'll get back to you

asap.

 Look those numbers up so you can call Monday. Then you might not feel so

helpless. ok? There is help out there, it's just a matter of finding it.

 many warm hugs,

tilly

 

 

Subject: new member

To: livercirrhosissupport

Date: Friday, September 12, 2008, 12:52 PM

Hello to all you brave caring people,

I am a new member here . My name is Lynn I am a mother, wife and

Grandma, ( very young one) LOL.

I joined this group at the beginning of the week and have spent days

reading everything. I do not uinderstand a lot but am getting most.

My younger brother has cirrhosis of the liver due to many years of

abusing alcohol and drugs. I came here for support and info. Boy am I

getting the info.

My brother's wife left him earlier this yr. and took their daughter

with her. She filed for divorce and this has left brother devestated.

you see she was abusing the same throughout thir marriage and just

recently stopped due to hep c and other health issues.She said she

can't be there and watch another husband die. Yes I did say ANOTHER.

My brother has also stopped so he says. I have to try and believe him

and from reading the posts he may be telling the truth.He has now

moved in with my elderly parents and is driving them bonkers it's

like looking after an infant or alzheimers patient and taking it's

toll on them heaqlth and mentally wise. I can't take him in cause I

have no room and children still at home. The GUILT is killing me.

I don't know what his levels are all I know is they are whacked. No

insurance and has to go through the county which isn't the best of

care. I do know his platelets are about 29. I do know they said no

surgery cause of platelets and no veins left(drugs). I do know he is

getting worse by the day. He is not jaundice yet, But he is bloated,

in pain, can barely walk, has boobs, has no appetite and when he does

eat it is lil and junk, he is suffering from what I call dementia for

lack of a better word. His amonia levels are high. Hence the

confusion and story telling. He falls asleep while talking and with

lit cigarettes. He is at the docs all the time for this test and that

one. First they said yes to colon cancer then no. He does have

infections in colon and is on a lot of antibiotics. He is also on

that one drug begins with " L " slipped mind now.Fot the confusion/

amonia levels. he doesn't know he is confused but geesh for example

he tried screwing a light bulb into a garden hose and that is only

one of many.He denies and makes excuses and stories to cover when we

tell him.

Oh well that is a lil of our story. Look fwd to meeting you all. also

look fwd to learning how to stay strong until the end and how to

prepare and finding out how long he will be among the living. I love

him so much and feel helpless that I can;t fix this for him

lynn

[Guest guest]

Hi, and welcome to our newest member. This is a great group of folks who all

have one thing in common, they or a loved one suffers from or has lost their

life to liver disease. There are currently over 400 members in this group. There

is a members data base and a photo album as well as a good files library and

list of good links, so come on in, and make yourself comfortable. Bobby,

moderator

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