Guest guest Posted January 15, 2001 Report Share Posted January 15, 2001 Seems to me that the one way not to be happy is to pursue happiness. We've tried buying it, snorting it, injecting it and drinking our way to it. Also praying for it, and asking others to give it to us. The great Founding Fathers made a mistake when they even suggested it could be acquired. Maybe all the unhappy people would not be sure everyone else was happy except for them, if it was not deemed a " right " I couldn't agree with you more, and the Dalai Lama except I don't believe we can ever completely get " outside the prison of self " It sounds to me the same as " be ye perfect... " A lofty goal we are bound to fail at reaching. But compassion I can attempt. Hasn't altruism developed a somewhat notorious history? I like the idea of loving others " as " you love yourself better than " more " than self. Joy comes unbidden, but happiness is a state of mind one can cultivate only after one has learned acceptance. Would you agree? Bless that holy man. Ton > > > > We have the right to free speech, to free > > > thought, and to happiness, among other freedoms. But what other > country > > > states that its population has a right to happiness? None. > > > > Ours doesn't either. Our founding documents state that we have the > right > > to the *pursuit* of happiness. The fact that we have now come to > > consider happiness itself a birthright is one of our major problems, > > imo. What could be more grandiose or narcissistic? > > > Dan Watkins > > Dear Dan, > Happiness is an art difficult in our culture, but what better work > is there? What better way? > > > 1. Compassion leads to happiness Dalai Lama's book urges all to > escape self-absorption > - > > He urges readers to find happiness by developing compassion for > others. > For him, compassion does not mean a bleeding heart. It is not a cause > for gloominess. It is the secret to eternal youth -- or at least > youthfulness. > > The Dalai Lama encourages us to see that compassion offers a kind of > liberation, the ability to rise above the prison of the self and see > that our problems are small compared with those others face. > > > " We find that not only do altruistic actions bring about happiness, > but > they also lessen our experience of suffering, " he > writes. " ...Sickness, > old age and mishaps of one sort or another are the same for us all. > But > the sufferings which undermine our internal peace -- anxiety, > frustration, disappointment -- are definitely less. When we worry less > about ourselves, the experience of our own suffering is less intense. " > > In other words, it's in our self-interest to be unselfish. > > " We are not talking about attaining Buddhahood here, we are not > talking > about achieving union with God, " he writes. " We are merely recognizing > that my interests and future happiness are closely connected to > others' > and learning to act accordingly. " > > > > As a good Buddhist, he is not supposed to become attached to worldly > possessions; yet he is hopelessly enamored of his collection of > wristwatches. His fascination with watches is an endless source of > annoyance to him, a sign of his imperfection. > > > While Christ instructs his followers to love their neighbors out of > obedience to God, the Dalai Lama, in a more secular context, makes a > rational argument geared to appeal to people of any faith, or no faith > at all: We should care for others because it will make us better human > beings. > > " We must be on the lookout for the slightest negativity and keep > asking > ourselves such questions as, 'Am I happier when my thoughts and > emotions > are negative and destructive or when they are wholesome?' " > > Happiness, in other words, involves work. > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted September 3, 2011 Report Share Posted September 3, 2011 Ya I can still laugh it up and enjoy things, but my brain definitely doesn't seem to be working like it once was. I feel dumber. My memory is horrible now and when my pssd is giving me problems my mind seems to be empty in general. I hope I will be able to work on my degree without having too much trouble. I feel like it should be in our power to be happy despite having sexual problems, but to me sometimes it feels like its not in my control. Anybody else having memory problems? > > Not like that, but I don't feel intense pain > Sent on the Sprint® Now Network from my BlackBerry® > > Happiness > > Does anyone here feel CONSISTENTLY happy? Does anyone feel like their life is overall pleasing? > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted September 4, 2011 Report Share Posted September 4, 2011 Its not in anyones power to force themselves to feel happy. If the serotonin system is decimated, one will not feel happy despite a desire to do so. Some are more damaged than others. I rarely feel anything but misery. I also have memory problems:( Happiness > > Does anyone here feel CONSISTENTLY happy? Does anyone feel like their life is overall pleasing? > ---------------------- Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted September 5, 2011 Report Share Posted September 5, 2011 I have big memory problems and feel nearly nothing. in some cases that's fine because in the past I often feel anxiety which is no nearty no-existent. But it is hard to live without highs and lows of feelings. > > > > Not like that, but I don't feel intense pain > > Sent on the Sprint® Now Network from my BlackBerry® > > > > Happiness > > > > Does anyone here feel CONSISTENTLY happy? Does anyone feel like their life is overall pleasing? > > > > > > > ---------------------- > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted September 5, 2011 Report Share Posted September 5, 2011 that's an interesting topic. I kinda feel like my desires are constantly satisfied. Sure, I still desire things but not as strong as before, also because I feel like " permanently satisfied " (I guess it's a serotonine mess-up effect of some kind: remember that serotonin is a neurotransmitter strongly related to satisfaction, for example it is released after orgasm...) so I dont have a real desire for things;in fact, my desire to enjoy things which is so low that this thing alone lead me to apathy and very low willingness to do anything... I guess the " rewarding " brain-thing system serves just to make living beings to do stuff and enjoy life.... anyway, I think that this wreckage has to be repaired somehow. I think that just the fact of acting " against it " could help the brain to repair the damage. So, one should try to enjoy things, to force pleasurable emotion (even though zen meditation, or NLP techninques and things like that). The brain CAN repair itself, if we help him to do so. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted September 5, 2011 Report Share Posted September 5, 2011 I did when I first got off haldol, almost 28 yrs ago. I was constantly told I was repeating myself, and I would introduce people twice. It was SO embarrassing. It took a very long time before I learned to trust myself again. However, that was many years ago, and I think my short term memory is better now that I am 63 than at that time, when I was in my 30s. The thing that remains is the genital numbness and total loss of libido. I think my pudendal nerve is permanently damaged. I suspect they unwittingly gave me a permanent saddle block when they gave me the haldol inter-muscularly, although I never had an intentional one with either of my two children. I hope that most of you have not had this happen. I am fortunate, though, to be able to find happiness in other ways; in working with children, teaching music and sign language, and especially being able to play with my own grandchildren. Yes, I can still laugh. Kay > > > > Not like that, but I don't feel intense pain > > Sent on the Sprint® Now Network from my BlackBerry® > > > > Happiness > > > > Does anyone here feel CONSISTENTLY happy? Does anyone feel like their life is overall pleasing? > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted September 5, 2011 Report Share Posted September 5, 2011 So you had pssd for THIRTY YEARS? I respect you for still staying alive and positive Sent on the Sprint® Now Network from my BlackBerry®Sender: SSRIsex Date: Mon, 05 Sep 2011 17:11:42 -0000To: <SSRIsex >ReplyTo: SSRIsex Subject: Re: Happiness I did when I first got off haldol, almost 28 yrs ago. I was constantly told I was repeating myself, and I would introduce people twice. It was SO embarrassing. It took a very long time before I learned to trust myself again. However, that was many years ago, and I think my short term memory is better now that I am 63 than at that time, when I was in my 30s. The thing that remains is the genital numbness and total loss of libido. I think my pudendal nerve is permanently damaged. I suspect they unwittingly gave me a permanent saddle block when they gave me the haldol inter-muscularly, although I never had an intentional one with either of my two children. I hope that most of you have not had this happen.I am fortunate, though, to be able to find happiness in other ways; in working with children, teaching music and sign language, and especially being able to play with my own grandchildren. Yes, I can still laugh. Kay> >> > Not like that, but I don't feel intense pain > > Sent on the Sprint® Now Network from my BlackBerry®> > > > Happiness> > > > Does anyone here feel CONSISTENTLY happy? Does anyone feel like their life is overall pleasing?> >> Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted September 9, 2011 Report Share Posted September 9, 2011 Yes it most certainly IS still an issue!!! If you'd seen some of my prior posts you would know that it also affects my urinary system. I don't think that it is normal for a woman OF ANY AGE to be so numb in her saddle area that she cannot even tell when she needs to urinate until she gets pressure in her abdomen. ('Often leaves me aching if I don't notice soon enough.) Also, I have been married to a man who is near my age for almost 32 years now, and he certainly is NOT numb! Yes, he still gets horny, and I still try to please him. Why ON EARTH do you think that being numb at my age would NOT be an issue? There ARE some women who have had operations, such as hysterectomies. I would think that many of those women suffer damage to their pudendal nerves and do lose their libidos after such traumas. I am not one of them. I am intact in every other way than being numb in my saddle area (I've had no operations and have been drug free for 28 years.). I don't know of any reason why, at a certain age, one would EXPECT to become numb, do you? By the way, as I've said before, I do NOT have PSSD (Post SSRI Sexual Dysfunction). My injury came from a neuroleptic. I have never taken SSRIs. Unfortunately I have not been able to find a forum for " Post Neuroleptic Sexual Dysfunction " . However, I am greatful very to finally know that I am not the only one who suffers in this way, and have been able to learn much from this site. No, at this point, I do not expect a cure. I would, if possible though, like to do something to awaken the public to the very serious issue of sexual dysfunction resulting not only from taking SSRIs, but also from taking neuroleptics. Kay > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Not like that, but I don't feel intense pain > > > > > > > Sent on the Sprint® Now Network from my BlackBerry® > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Happiness > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Does anyone here feel CONSISTENTLY happy? Does anyone feel like their life is overall pleasing? > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted September 9, 2011 Report Share Posted September 9, 2011 " ...at the age of 63, whether you've suffered from PSSD or not, a loss of libido is inevitable. " > Where do you get that information ? Kay > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Not like that, but I don't feel intense pain > > > > > > > Sent on the Sprint® Now Network from my BlackBerry® > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Happiness > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Does anyone here feel CONSISTENTLY happy? Does anyone feel like their life is overall pleasing? > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted September 9, 2011 Report Share Posted September 9, 2011 It is definitley inevitable. As you age, you lose your libido. It's still possible to have one in your 60's and 70's but obviously it isn't going to be anywhere near as strong as it was say in your teenage years. > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Not like that, but I don't feel intense pain > > > > > > > > Sent on the Sprint® Now Network from my BlackBerry® > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Happiness > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Does anyone here feel CONSISTENTLY happy? Does anyone feel like their life is overall pleasing? > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted September 9, 2011 Report Share Posted September 9, 2011 I believe I am being misunderstood. All that I was saying is that as you age your libido does drop (you lose it). And it isn't totally unseeable that you can lose it completely at that age. Libido and genital anaesthesia are all connected together that will diminish as you age. Don't you see the ED commercials on television that state that over 40% of men over 40 suffer from some form of erectile dysfunction? Everyone is different. Some lose it earlier than others. Facts are facts, it's too bad if you can't see them. I believe that makes you the ignorant one > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Not like that, but I don't feel intense pain > > > > > > > > Sent on the Sprint® Now Network from my BlackBerry® > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Happiness > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Does anyone here feel CONSISTENTLY happy? Does anyone feel like their life is overall pleasing? > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted September 9, 2011 Report Share Posted September 9, 2011 It's called life . As you age your libido will diminish. > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Not like that, but I don't feel intense pain > > > > > > > > Sent on the Sprint® Now Network from my BlackBerry® > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Happiness > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Does anyone here feel CONSISTENTLY happy? Does anyone feel like their life is overall pleasing? > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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