Guest guest Posted May 3, 2006 Report Share Posted May 3, 2006 > Southern Grandma> > > Lawyers should never ask a Southern Grandma a question if they aren't> prepared for the answer.> In a trial, a Southern Small-Town Prosecuting Attorney called his first> witness.> A Grandmotherly, Elderly Woman to the stand. He approached her and> asked, "Mrs. , do you know me?"> > She responded, "Why, yes, I do know you, Mr. . I've known you> since you were a young boy, and frankly, you've been a big> disappointment to me. You lie, you cheat on your Wife, and you> manipulate people and talk about them behind their backs. You think> you're a big shot when you haven't the brains to realize you never will> amount to anything more than a two-bit paper pusher. Yes, I know you."> > The Lawyer was stunned! Not knowing what else to do, he pointed across> the room and asked, "Mrs. , do you know the Defense Attorney?" She> again replied, "Why, yes, I do. I've known Mr. Bradley since he was a> youngster, too. He's lazy, bigoted, and he has a drinking problem. He> can't build a normal relationship with anyone and his law practice is> one of the worst in the entire state.> Not to mention he cheated on his Wife> with three different Women. One of them was your Wife. Yes, I know him."> > The Defense Attorney almost died. The Judge asked both Counselors to> approach the bench and, in a very quiet voice, said, "If either of you> Idiots asks her if she knows Me, I'll send you BOTH to the Electric> Chair." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted May 3, 2006 Report Share Posted May 3, 2006 , Most who read this think it is made up. Having spent 17 years up in your neck of the woods, I wasted a good five minutes trying to figure our just which lawyers and judge the story is about, but gave up as it could have been several. And the grandmother was probably mine. Thanks for starting my day with a laugh. W. (OT) Southern Grandma > Southern Grandma> > > Lawyers should never ask a Southern Grandma a question if they aren't> prepared for the answer.> In a trial, a Southern Small-Town Prosecuting Attorney called his first> witness.> A Grandmotherly, Elderly Woman to the stand. He approached her and> asked, "Mrs. , do you know me?"> > She responded, "Why, yes, I do know you, Mr. . I've known you> since you were a young boy, and frankly, you've been a big> disappointment to me. You lie, you cheat on your Wife, and you> manipulate people and talk about them behind their backs. You think> you're a big shot when you haven't the brains to realize you never will> amount to anything more than a two-bit paper pusher. Yes, I know you."> > The Lawyer was stunned! Not knowing what else to do, he pointed across> the room and asked, "Mrs. , do you know the Defense Attorney?" She> again replied, "Why, yes, I do. I've known Mr. Bradley since he was a> youngster, too. He's lazy, bigoted, and he has a drinking problem. He> can't build a normal relationship with anyone and his law practice is> one of the worst in the entire state.> Not to mention he cheated on his Wife> with three different Women. One of them was your Wife. Yes, I know him."> > The Defense Attorney almost died. The Judge asked both Counselors to> approach the bench and, in a very quiet voice, said, "If either of you> Idiots asks her if she knows Me, I'll send you BOTH to the Electric> Chair." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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