Re: Intro

[Guest guest]

In a message dated 9/4/01 10:33:15 PM Central Daylight Time, kevnhou@...

writes:

> le,

>

> I think he needs to be evaluated right away. Find a pediatrician that

> will

> listen to you.

>

>

I'm kinda leary of doctors. I do things differently so I have a hard time

with some doctors. My youngest son was born with craniosynostosis and

the first time he saw a doctor he saw our family doctor. Btw- was born

at home. This doctor immediately saw a problem and sent us for xrays. So, I

am happy that he caught that early. was able to have the surgery he

needed when he needed it. I have heard of stories where docs take a wait and

see approach and then the kid is diagnosed much later and it is harder on

them as the get older because their bones in their heads are harder to mold.

So, I trust this doctor. He doesn't try to change things that I do, like

extended nursing, co-sleeping, no vax-or delayed. I did call the MHMR

yesterday and someone is suppossed to call back with an appmnt for an

evaluation. Thanks for the welcome.

le

married to Isaac

SAHM to

Marisa 6

Jordan 3

Christian 2

1-26-01 cvr 5-30-01

[Guest guest]

,

By the way, I forgot to mention that there are a lot of diagnostic

tests in the Links section that may prove handy as you continue with

your personal assessment.

I suppose I ought to introduce myself too.

My name is Tom. I am AS/HFA (Highly Functioning Autistic). I am

the administrator for the FAM family of forums.

I wasn't actually diagnosed until a couple years ago as an adult,

and since there is no real accurate assessment tool for adults in

the US, there is always a question as to whether or not that

assessment is correct, but I'm sure it is.

I present with many of the indicators: Social ineptitude, lack of

eye contact, the ability to stay on task with feverish intensity to

the exclusion of all else, aversion to light, sensitivity to tastes,

touch and smells, lack of close friends, etc....

And I'm proud of it.

I hope you stick around and learn as much as you desire. There are

many people here that come and go. It is the holiday season, so

many will be in and out and particpating in their various religious

holidays. Other times the board gets quite lively.

There is a database for introductions in the Database section if

you'd like to learn more about some of us.

Tom

>

In a big city like Chicago, I imagine there are a lot of learning

resources, but I think a group like this should prove beneficial in

a nice, safe, anonymous kind of way. Thanks for being here. ~ R.C.

[Guest guest]

Just out of curiosity, is " holiday depression " a common experience in

the A.S. community? I have gone thru it for as long as I can

remember. Even as a kid, I didn't really enjoy the holidays in the

same traditional way as most of the other kids.

> >

> In a big city like Chicago, I imagine there are a lot of learning

> resources, but I think a group like this should prove beneficial in

> a nice, safe, anonymous kind of way. Thanks for being here. ~ R.C.

[Guest guest]

Hi , and welcome.

> As a new member of this group, I figure the polite thing to do is

introduce myself. My name is , (Ric for short) and I only

recently became aware of the existence of A.S. through a radio

interview on NPR's " Fresh Air " program with Terry Gross. The person

being interviewed (I forgot his name) really provided me with

an " AHA " moment. I listened with great interest as the gentleman

spoke of a lot of familiar situations and scenarios that he was

dealing with. Although I have not sought out a " professional " opinion

as of yet, I'm pretty sure there is probably much to be learned here

in this group. Two things about me that may (or may not) be

indicative of A.S. are my chosen career in " Show Biz " and my

preference of animals (particularly dogs) over people. In a big city

like Chicago, I imagine there are a lot of learning resources, but I

think a group like this should prove beneficial in a nice, safe,

anonymous kind of way. Thanks for being here. ~ R.C.

I too was diagnosed as an adult, after I saw a TV program about a boy with

AS and immediately recognised myself; peculiar interets, eating the same

food every day, needing predictability etc. Many Aspies prefer animals over

people, though I suspect most of us are rather introvert and prefer to stay

out of the limelight. :-)

> Just out of curiosity, is " holiday depression " a common experience

in the A.S. community? I have gone thru it for as long as I can

remember. Even as a kid, I didn't really enjoy the holidays in the

same traditional way as most of the other kids.

From the posts on this subject last month, there seems to be mixed feelings

about holidays. Some aspies love them, others hate them or are indifferent.

Many singles in my Swedish Aspie-groups say that they tend to get extra

depressed. I used to like them as a kid, but now my interest is very mild.

All holidays except Christmas I completely ignore. Christmas I like mainly

because of all the pretty lights and nice atmosphere.

But I don't celebrate it except by lighting a star in my window and sending

cards to my family and closest friends. I don't see the logic in overeating

when we are no longer starving peasants, or giving heaps of presents to

adults who already have more than they need. But if others want to do so,

that's ok with me. Just as long as I don't have to. Luckily I've managed to

train my relatives into accepting that they'd better not send me any gifts

unless there is something I need and specifically ask for.

Today they celebrate St. Lucia here - in the form of girls with (electric)

candles in their hair singing and serving coffee & saffron buns. Very

illogical since she was a catholic saint and we're a protestant/secularised

country. But teens love it since it gives them an excuse to go out and get

blasted. Sigh. I'm just ignoring it. :-)

Inger

[Guest guest]

Hi Ric

A big warm welcome to the group; you most certainly will find

answers to any questions you need to ask here. You've won me over

already when you said that you prefer animals to humans especially

dogs!

Many Blessings

Debs

PS when you say show biz what do you do?

>

> As a new member of this group, I figure the polite thing to do

is

> introduce myself. My name is , (Ric for short) and I only

> recently became aware of the existence of A.S. through a radio

> interview on NPR's " Fresh Air " program with Terry Gross. The

person

> being interviewed (I forgot his name) really provided me with

> an " AHA " moment. I listened with great interest as the gentleman

> spoke of a lot of familiar situations and scenarios that he was

> dealing with. Although I have not sought out a " professional "

opinion

> as of yet, I'm pretty sure there is probably much to be learned

here

> in this group. Two things about me that may (or may not) be

> indicative of A.S. are my chosen career in " Show Biz " and my

> preference of animals (particularly dogs) over people. In a big

city

> like Chicago, I imagine there are a lot of learning resources, but

I

> think a group like this should prove beneficial in a nice, safe,

> anonymous kind of way. Thanks for being here. ~ R.C.

[Guest guest]

,

I am going through it right now. And I don't wish to depress

everyone here (or wherever you are) but I feel compelled to go into

specifics. So if you enjoy the holidays, leave this post now before

I depress you to death.

When I was little, I used to enjoy getting presesnts for Christmas,

but as I got older, that faded really quick and there was no real

reason for me to enjoy the holidays. Even giving presents was not

particularly enjoyable for me because I've always felt giving people

things ought to be spontaneous and from the heart, not because there

is a pre-assigned day when everyone exchanges gifts. I thought it

was enough just to recognize the birth of Christ, but everyone else

always made it about the gifts.

Thus at a very early age I was branded as a scrooge or a grinch.

I've always found the social gatherings associated with Christmas to

be extrememly stressful. We used to have parties on Christmas Eve by

my grandma's and grandpa's and all my aunts and uncles and cousins

used to come to that. We have a very big family. My grandmother had

actually been married twice (once after her first husband died) so

all the step-family was always there too.

So there would be as many as a fifty or sixty people there and we

would spend about three hours at the party. I can remember getting

dizzy and nauseaus from people laughing, singing and shouting at the

top of their lungs.

I did not think it was funny when grandpa got drunk and tried to get

all the little boys and girls to drink beer or gin, and when he

called me over I always wanted to hit him and wouldn't drink the

beer he offerred. This always made the rest of the adults laugh like

idiots.

All the adults loved him.

On the way home my mother, hopelessly inebriated, would talk about

what a wonderful time she had and give a summary of what was going

on in everybody's lives. So and so was starting school. So and so

was getting all 'A's in school. So and so was failing out of

college. So and so was pregnant. So and so lost the baby. So and so

was joining the service. So and so was leaving the service. You have

to keep in mind that she had spent three hours circulating among 60

people which meant that she spent about 3 minutes on average with

each of them, most of whom she hadn't seen in a year.

And the lecture I always got whenever I didn't want to go to these

things was that it was all about family bonding. How can you bond

with someone you never see but once a year and for only three

minutes each time you do see them?

What I find the most stressful is the shopping and the crowds. I,

myself never want anything for Christmas, but my family members do,

so I need to shop for them. Most of the stuff they want they will

never use or not use often, but I get it for them. They all come

back from Christmas shopping very happy, saying it's fun to shop and

see so many people out and about. The hustle and bustle of holiday

activity enlivens them, they say.

All that activity does the opposite for me. It sucks the marrow out

of my bones.

I always gauge which line moves the fastest and choose the shortest

and/or fastest line when I am ready to check out, and I think it's

the same person who stands in front of me at every store I go to

every single year.

This person has no gender or intelligence but consistently has a

loud mouth. Either his/her credit card has expired, or he/she writes

a check and can't find his/her ID, or he/she argues with the clerk

that the item that's getting rung up is on sale and even though the

clerk points to the sign that says otherwise, he/she argues anyway,

and then we have to hear this person's life story about how all the

woes this person has had shopping that day and how it's the stores

fault that the machine isn't validating his/her Mastercard.

It is all very depressing, and the most depressing of all, is that

when you try to point out to anyone that Christmas is too

commercialized and ought to be about the birth of Christ, they look

at you like you are nuts.

At our office we had Hannukah (sp?) stuff going on last week, I

think we've got Kwansa (sp?) stuff and a christmas party coming up

and then New Year's after that. I will indeed be thankful when it

is over.

Tom

P.S. Sorry for depressing everyone.

>

Just out of curiosity, is " holiday depression " a common experience in

the A.S. community? I have gone thru it for as long as I can

remember. Even as a kid, I didn't really enjoy the holidays in the

same traditional way as most of the other kids