Re: Concerning Behaviors

[Guest guest]

Katy is 14 now and she doesn't really have a good friend. Since I homeschool,

she is not around kids everyday. there are girls in the neighborhood that will

come over to swim with her, but this is usually limited to the summer time.

During the school year, everyone is just so busy with their own activities.

When she is around other kids, she is very immature. However, she is very

content and doesn't ask for friends to come over. I usually do the inviting.

charlotte

Concerning Behaviors

Hi All!

.I was interested to see the questions here regarding our children's

behaviors...Now we all know that for our children Down Syndrome is somewhat of a

Spectrum Disorder...some our children look typically DS and some do not...some

fall right in the middle...Some have average or above average IQs and some do

not etc....I would like to know how everyone elses children are socially...do

they have a lot of friends? Do you think that they act immature?...Do they tend

to talk out of context?...Im asking this because Ariel, who some of you may

remember was diagnosed with as High Functioning Autistic a few years back, is

definitely socially immature...I have seen many posts over the years concerning

children that had the same issues. As our children get older, Ariel is 12, how

are their friendships, how do they relate to their peers? For Ariel friendships

have gotten harder as she has gotten older...how about for anyone else?

Sincerely,

Mom to Ariel 12 MDS, and the twins 7

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[Guest guest]

Darlene,

I know how much that hurts! You want more than anything for the kids to

include her and for her to have those friends. Eventually, the other kids will

begin to include her. I think 7 yr old girls tend to be very " clickish " and even

though they always are " clickish " there will be at least one in the group that

will take the time to get to know for and they will become

friends!

Hopefully, at this point, doesn't realize that they aren't totally

including her. and, hopefully she will soon get a special friend of her own.

Kristy

Darlene Benoit wrote:

-

is very immature for her age - she is 7 but prefers to be with 5 year

old boys (mainly because they don't talk much and don't expect her too

either). But she is very social and tries to hang out with the older girls

but they don't include her because she doesn't act like them and talk or

whisper. She will follow them around like a puppy but they don't include

her and it hurts me to see that.

Darlene - mom to (9) and (7)

>

> Hi All!

>

> .I was interested to see the questions here regarding our children's

> behaviors...Now we all know that for our children Down Syndrome is somewhat

> of a Spectrum Disorder...some our children look typically DS and some do

> not...some fall right in the middle...Some have average or above average IQs

> and some do not etc....I would like to know how everyone elses children are

> socially...do they have a lot of friends? Do you think that they act

> immature?...Do they tend to talk out of context?...Im asking this because

> Ariel, who some of you may remember was diagnosed with as High Functioning

> Autistic a few years back, is definitely socially immature...I have seen

> many posts over the years concerning children that had the same issues. As

> our children get older, Ariel is 12, how are their friendships, how do they

> relate to their peers? For Ariel friendships have gotten harder as she has

> gotten older...how about for anyone else?

>

> Sincerely,

> Mom to Ariel 12 MDS, and the twins 7

>

>

> Become a member of IMDSA today at http://www.imdsa.com

> *************************************************

> Contact IMDSA Today at:

> IMDSA~PO Box 1052~lin,TX~77856~USA~1-

> *************************************************

>

[Guest guest]

I found what you said about Katy's singing very interesting. Adam also loves

music and singing. He can sing most of the word to a song like it is nothing.

When it comes to speech, he can only talk in two or three word phrases.

Donna - gram to Adam 3 1/2

Charlotte Siegmund wrote:

Since Katy was very young (she is now 14) - when she gets excited about

something, she will flap her hands back and forth really fast - it is kind of

hard to describe, but her arms are going straight out (not up) and her hands are

going. As soon as I just touch her hands, she stops, but we can be at the movies

or just at home and something funny or exciting and she will flap her hands. I

can give her a quick verbal cue or physical cue by just touching her hands and

she will stop.

With her speech, sometimes she has a hard time getting certain words out or will

stutter. However, when she sings - she NEVER stutters or has problems with

words. Her piano teacher will sometimes put on a prerecorded song on the digital

piano, and she will sing and sing and just make up the words as she goes along -

and never stutter.

As for adverse behaviors, she has really been as easy child. I cannot remember

one time she ever threw a fit, she never bit anyone and is not a hitter at all.

She hardly even cries about anything. Early on, we disciplined her the same as

our son - made sure she understood why she was being disciplined (which was

usually pops with a designated paddle) and always disciplined in love. She

responded very well to discipline and hardly got pops at all.

Please don't think she is a perfect child - she's definitely has her

stubbornness at times, but just being firm with her usually gets her past it -

sometimes she just has to talk it out with herself - she does self-talk a lot in

her room.

Also something else that I know has helped with her behavior, as with any child,

is her response to the Word of God. I have taught her Bible lessons since very

early. As soon as she became God conscious, she did believe on the Lord Jesus

Christ as her Savior. When it comes to learning God's Word, there is no handicap

- your human IQ is no handicap. God in his Grace has provided a way for anyone,

regardless of IQ, to learn his Word. One of the very basic principles was

" Children, Obey your parents in the Lord, for this right. " Eph. 6:1 - The

principle of Volition, she has freewill and can choose " yes " or " no " - all of

these concepts were taught with lots of visuals and hands-on manipulative. Right

now, we are studying Moses and the children of Israel and not being a grumbler.

Sometimes, Katy doesn't want to go to her piano lesson and we start talking

about our lessons in Moses and then she can apply what she has learned to her

own attitude about piano lessons. It really does turn

things around.

Not trying to get preachy here but God's Word is alive and powerful and it does

make a difference in the lives of our children.

Charlotte

Concerning Behaviors

Hi Everyone,

I was wondering if you could characterize some specific behaviors in your child

with MDS. I know that frustration builds when there is a delay in communication,

and that often causes the child to lash out by hitting, biting, or thowing a

fit. (perhaps you can include your input on that)

Also, as I wrote in our last newsletter, Wandering is a big issue with children

with MDS.

Are there other specific behaviors that you are dealing with or have dealt with?

And, what age is or has your child exhibited this behavior?

Thanks

Kristy

[Guest guest]

In a message dated 3/9/2006 9:28:07 P.M. Eastern Standard Time,

ajaaj@... writes:

As our children get older, Ariel is 12, how are their friendships, how do

they relate to their peers? For Ariel friendships have gotten harder as she has

gotten older...how about for anyone else?

I am very interested to hear others experience with their older children.

is also socially immature and this year the social issue has been

our biggest problem. She gets made fun of a lot in school and doesn't have any

real friends. There are one or two girls she talks with in school but she

doesn't see anyone outside of school. All she wants is to have friends to

hang out with and go to the mall, all those typical 12 year old things. She is

also very self-conscious about the way she looks and her newest issue is the

fact that she is short (4 ft 9 inches), but she comes from short parents so

not much chance of growing too much taller.

Kristy, it's interesting that Tim used to peel his skin. does

this too to the point where she has literally peeled huge chunks of skin from

her fingers. If she gets a pimple she cannot leave it alone and has rubbed

them until she makes big sores which take months to heal. These are on her

face and though she hates the way they look she can't leave them alone. If she

isn't peeling skin, or picking at a pimple or sore, then she bites her lips.

I think it has to do with her stress level.

The social issue is the hardest issue I have faced with because I

don't know what you can do to help someone mature. I just want her to have a

few friends and not feel like she's so different from everyone else.

ann

[Guest guest]

This is to a TTTT. He has had a friend called for as

ever long as i can remember , and now has a team of 'boys' that get

in trouble when he does something wrong!!!

During the last holidays, i was babysitting my best friends two

kids, both whom hae grown up with , and one was actually in the

same kinder class when they started school togehter so she

could 'help ' the teacher understand him, but i also had my

girlfriends step daughter, who is 9 and has only known us for about

2 years, and then only for about twice each year. was

chatting to and the 'boys' playing with his cars, and the

step daughter said to her step sister - who is talking to, and

said, oh thats just scotts good friends.....so like they were

just there in the room with him....it was so great to hear

>

> Hmm... I don't consider it too 'concerning', but , 13, like,

was it

> Nat?, has a whole cast and crew of imaginary friends, names and

all, and he has

> very animated, lively conversations with them. For the most part,

he does

> control this in public, and in the classroom as far as I know, but

at home, when he

> can go alone into his room, he really lets go!! I've seen him

start to

> get into it in the car when we're all driving, and we just have to

remind him to

> " turn the volume down " on his " friends " and sound effects, and you

can tell

> he was in his own lil world and didn't realize he was doing it

that loudly!

>

>

> ~ANGEL~

> Mom to (13) Mosaic Down Syndrome/Hirschsprung's Disease

> and

> Lance (17), Tyler (14), (11)

> Jaeda (9) and Shayne (3)

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

That is so funny!! 's " friends " have names...but they're more like

cartoon character names than " people " names...the main one is just called,

" Boy " ... and whenever gets in trouble, he says he didn't do it, Boy did

it!

Other names are Pet... Sharkteeth... the list goes on... all my other

children, have been growing up with this too basically, so recently, my oldest

son

DREW all the characters on paper for , and they just came more to life

than ever, and now they all have visualizations for them all...

My husband and I did wonder if making them more real was something to be

concerned about...but I think we decided that it was ok, because it's given all

the kids a reason to interact more with ...

~ANGEL~

mom to (13) Mosaic Down Syndrome/Hirschsprung's Disease

Lance (17), Tyler (14), (11)

Jaeda (9) and Shayne (3)