VENT...Whine....

[Guest guest]

I don't post very often here, either--but, read all of the posts.  I'm not sure

if this is the appropriate forum for what I need at the moment (don't need the

research articles, etc)....so, please refer me someplace else if this isn't

where this belongs.

I've been feeling REALLY down lately---lacking meaning and purpose in my life. 

I have a lot of gratitude for the things in my life that I DO have---I don't

have to struggle financially, etc. etc.  BUT, I still am not HAPPY with my

life.  Doctor said that I'm not depressed--and I have been on antidepressants

in

the past and have noticed little difference.  I don't LIKE my life with this

disease--and I've had it for over 15 years.

How does one get past this?  Is it ABOUT acceptance?  I KNOW that I have a

disease---that I have lost a lot of friends because of it....that I had to leave

my high power career because of it....that I don't enjoy reading any longer

because of the ADD that comes along with it, that I don't enjoy much of ANYTHING

any longer!  I am single...have rescued a little Yorkie--and that is about all

that is in my life at the moment. ..and probably as much as I can seem to

handle.

I moved from the Cleveland area to FL about two years ago---and the weather is

better for my FMS....but, it is very hard to get out an meet new people or

establish any type of meaningful relationships---when I cannot be consistent

about " showing up " .

Does anyone else have a similar experience---or can offer any wise words?  I

surely know that things could be a lot worse....as I listen/read about others

situations.  I early retired at age 51 because of my FMS........ I am getting

my

pension and also SSDI.  So, I am all set in that sense---but, all set for

WHAT? 

I don't have a LIFE.....it feels....

Thanks.

Lynn