why does she mention sex to my husband

[Guest guest]

This topic is not 100% solved for me yet.

DREAM:

Last night I had a dream that Gabi was flirting with and close with

my husband and he was enjoying it. Then I went over there to do

something about it. And I asked her directly if she wants to be with

him.

And she said YES!

I told her that I knew it all along.

And then I woke up.

Needless to say I felt yucky inside after waking from that dream.

Then I found more evidence.

My husband, and Gabi and I were all at a meditation retreat together.

And I took photos of the retreat teacher, and the location and photos

of my husband and he took some of me.

So, she wanted to scan the photos of the " meditation teacher " (she

said). So, I gave her the photos.

Later she gave my husband a CD with the photos scanned on it.

The thing that I noticed is that she scanned all of the pictures of

my husband FIRST! Not the meditation teacher.

Later came the meditation teacher, and who was last to be scanned it?

Me of course.

Now I have to process this internally again.

Is my dream trying to tell me that she does have interest in him?

Or, is this 100% my inner stuff that keeps wanting to be seen?

Jealousy has been a problem for me. It is sooo painful. Like inner

torture.

And I know that I have to stay with ME inside.

To stay out there in these stories is horrible!!!

[Guest guest]

Yes, you are correct, this topic is not 100% solved yet.

After awakening from your dream, you said:

" Needless to say I felt yucky inside after waking from that dream. "

Well, what you feel inside is 100% based upon your story you tell

yourself. (Creation = Think, Feel, Act, Have) per BK.

So, based upon the story you told yourself in the dream, you could do

The Work on one of the following things:

1. Gabi/Women/People should not flirt.

2. Gabi/Women/People should not flirt with my husband.

3. Gabi/Women/People should not want to be with someone else.

4. Gabi/Women/People should not want to be with my husband.

5. My husband should not enjoy Gabi/Women/People paying him

attention.

By the way, I and my wife taught a dream interpretation class for 15

years and then back in 1998, we discovered The Work and that taught

us that " stories are stories " , whether they occur at night or during

the day (in fact that is just another story) and the only meaning

stories have are what we give them and we have the choice of

believing them or doing The Work on them.

The story about the photos is merely a result of you still believing

this story. As long as your believe your story, the world has no

choice but to reflect the result of your belief right back at you.

You are definitely on the right track here and I applaud your desire

to rid yourself of this stress.

Blessings, Steve D.

> This topic is not 100% solved for me yet.

> DREAM:

> Last night I had a dream that Gabi was flirting with and close with

> my husband and he was enjoying it. Then I went over there to do

> something about it. And I asked her directly if she wants to be

with

> him.

> And she said YES!

> I told her that I knew it all along.

> And then I woke up.

> Needless to say I felt yucky inside after waking from that dream.

>

> Then I found more evidence.

> My husband, and Gabi and I were all at a meditation retreat

together.

> And I took photos of the retreat teacher, and the location and

photos

> of my husband and he took some of me.

> So, she wanted to scan the photos of the " meditation teacher " (she

> said). So, I gave her the photos.

> Later she gave my husband a CD with the photos scanned on it.

> The thing that I noticed is that she scanned all of the pictures of

> my husband FIRST! Not the meditation teacher.

> Later came the meditation teacher, and who was last to be scanned

it?

> Me of course.

>

> Now I have to process this internally again.

>

> Is my dream trying to tell me that she does have interest in him?

> Or, is this 100% my inner stuff that keeps wanting to be seen?

>

> Jealousy has been a problem for me. It is sooo painful. Like inner

> torture.

> And I know that I have to stay with ME inside.

> To stay out there in these stories is horrible!!!

[Guest guest]

Thank you Steve.

What is coming up for me is that " ownership " is part of this problem.

To think: " my husband " leads to:

I have to protect " my " possession.

" I " am the special person in his life.

He is the special person in " my " life.

Other women are not included in " our " special relationship.

There is no freedom in this kind of thinking.

It is soooo controlling and manipulative and needy (but from the

wrong source).

" He is my husband " Is it true? No! and I can go to the place where

I have wished he was not my husband.

How do I feel when I hold the belief " He is my husband " .

Then I take on the role of " wife " and it often resembles " mother " as

well. I sometimes feel like I am his mother and not his wife.

It feels like a phoney security that is very unstable and I have to

put in soooooo much effort to maintain it.

I want a husband to feel secure!

But, this does not work either!

I dont feel secure just because I have a husband.

What a mess based on lies and attempts to feel safe and secure and

loved. But, it is not working. It just does not work! Because it is

a lie. One big lie!

And I feel the need to face it.

I am tired of living this lie. Actually, my whole life is a big lie.

I am starting to see that everything is a lie.

How nice to finally start to notice what is going on.

I had no clue how extensive this lie is.

Feels like every single thing I do has ulterior motives.

The way I stand, the way I talk, the way I dress, the attempts to

impress and please, my image, what others should think of me, and my

house and my car, and my job, and my friends, and my family........

Makes me want to vomit!

There is zero freedom in my life. It is just one contracted

manipulation after another.

My insides are screaming.

I want to know the truth. Finally.

Just bought s new book. Will start to read it now.

I am off to bed with my book!

> > This topic is not 100% solved for me yet.

> > DREAM:

> > Last night I had a dream that Gabi was flirting with and close

with

> > my husband and he was enjoying it. Then I went over there to do

> > something about it. And I asked her directly if she wants to be

> with

> > him.

> > And she said YES!

> > I told her that I knew it all along.

> > And then I woke up.

> > Needless to say I felt yucky inside after waking from that dream.

> >

> > Then I found more evidence.

> > My husband, and Gabi and I were all at a meditation retreat

> together.

> > And I took photos of the retreat teacher, and the location and

> photos

> > of my husband and he took some of me.

> > So, she wanted to scan the photos of the " meditation teacher "

(she

> > said). So, I gave her the photos.

> > Later she gave my husband a CD with the photos scanned on it.

> > The thing that I noticed is that she scanned all of the pictures

of

> > my husband FIRST! Not the meditation teacher.

> > Later came the meditation teacher, and who was last to be scanned

> it?

> > Me of course.

> >

> > Now I have to process this internally again.

> >

> > Is my dream trying to tell me that she does have interest in him?

> > Or, is this 100% my inner stuff that keeps wanting to be seen?

> >

> > Jealousy has been a problem for me. It is sooo painful. Like

inner

> > torture.

> > And I know that I have to stay with ME inside.

> > To stay out there in these stories is horrible!!!

[Guest guest]

I'm so happy to see where you have gone with this, " In Love "

From where I sit we humans are basically non-monogamous, we just have

a lot of denial about that. Congratulations on having the courage to

go in and examine your thoughts. I appreciate that about you.

Love,

[Guest guest]

Dear Love,

I love this post and your reflections on marriage, wifedom and the

pursuit of stability and safety in marriage.

I wanted to get married...and when I did 22 years ago, I found a whole

mountain of beliefs attached to marriage.... with the biggest one

being: as a married woman I should not be attracted to any other man,

even in friendship, except for the man I'm married to. Wait! That

means I have to stop my feelings of love for half the people on the

planet! Impossible! Can I smile at another man? What does it mean?

Will he think I'm flirting? Will I be unfaithful to my husband even if

I have a conversation with another man at a party? Eek! Will he be

jealous? Where did all these beliefs come from?

Thanks for diving into this pool called marriage...let me know what

pearls of wisdom you find.

More below....

>

> What is coming up for me is that " ownership " is part of this problem.

> To think: " my husband " leads to:

> I have to protect " my " possession.

> " I " am the special person in his life.

> He is the special person in " my " life.

> Other women are not included in " our " special relationship.

>

> There is no freedom in this kind of thinking.

> It is soooo controlling and manipulative and needy (but from the

> wrong source).

>

> " He is my husband " Is it true? No! and I can go to the place where

> I have wished he was not my husband.

> How do I feel when I hold the belief " He is my husband " .

> Then I take on the role of " wife " and it often resembles " mother " as

> well. I sometimes feel like I am his mother and not his wife.

> It feels like a phoney security that is very unstable and I have to

> put in soooooo much effort to maintain it.

> I want a husband to feel secure!

> But, this does not work either!

> I dont feel secure just because I have a husband.

He is not my husband. He is my lover. He is my best friend. He is my

man. He is the one who makes oatmeal for me every morning. He is the

one who massages my legs when I have a cramp in them. He is the one

whom I had children with. He is the man whom I remind to mow the lawn.

He is the one I have sex with. He is the one who laughs at my corny

jokes. He is my husband.

I am my husband. Truer.

I am married to my the soulman/heart within. Every man I see and fall

in love with is a refection of my heart. I get to see my heart as

strong, wild, deep, passionate, free, sexy, and sweet with innocence.

I am grateful for men is showing me mySelf.

My thinking is married to my heart. True. Integrity.

>

> What a mess based on lies and attempts to feel safe and secure and

> loved. But, it is not working. It just does not work! Because it is

> a lie. One big lie!

> And I feel the need to face it.

> I am tired of living this lie. Actually, my whole life is a big lie.

> I am starting to see that everything is a lie.

> How nice to finally start to notice what is going on.

>

> I had no clue how extensive this lie is.

> Feels like every single thing I do has ulterior motives.

> The way I stand, the way I talk, the way I dress, the attempts to

> impress and please, my image, what others should think of me, and my

> house and my car, and my job, and my friends, and my family........

> Makes me want to vomit!

> There is zero freedom in my life. It is just one contracted

> manipulation after another.

> My insides are screaming.

>

> I want to know the truth. Finally.

>

> Just bought s new book. Will start to read it now.

> I am off to bed with my book!

!

Night, night.

Love, nne

[Guest guest]

You are welcome and thank you for such a lovely and heartfelt post

regarding your findings. Yes, there are no new stories, they are all

recycled. Youo happended to pull on the thread that unraveled the

whole damn " He's my husband, I'm his wife, Lived happlily ever after,

Fairy Tale! "

What freedom and joy when the lies are exposed to the light of

understanding.

The more you " undo " these " fairy tales " , the more you will be able to

experience that the rest of us (especially your husband) loves you

with all of our heart and there is not a damn thing we or you can do

about it.

Blessings, Steve D.

> > > This topic is not 100% solved for me yet.

> > > DREAM:

> > > Last night I had a dream that Gabi was flirting with and close

> with

> > > my husband and he was enjoying it. Then I went over there to do

> > > something about it. And I asked her directly if she wants to be

> > with

> > > him.

> > > And she said YES!

> > > I told her that I knew it all along.

> > > And then I woke up.

> > > Needless to say I felt yucky inside after waking from that

dream.

> > >

> > > Then I found more evidence.

> > > My husband, and Gabi and I were all at a meditation retreat

> > together.

> > > And I took photos of the retreat teacher, and the location and

> > photos

> > > of my husband and he took some of me.

> > > So, she wanted to scan the photos of the " meditation teacher "

> (she

> > > said). So, I gave her the photos.

> > > Later she gave my husband a CD with the photos scanned on it.

> > > The thing that I noticed is that she scanned all of the

pictures

> of

> > > my husband FIRST! Not the meditation teacher.

> > > Later came the meditation teacher, and who was last to be

scanned

> > it?

> > > Me of course.

> > >

> > > Now I have to process this internally again.

> > >

> > > Is my dream trying to tell me that she does have interest in

him?

> > > Or, is this 100% my inner stuff that keeps wanting to be seen?

> > >

> > > Jealousy has been a problem for me. It is sooo painful. Like

> inner

> > > torture.

> > > And I know that I have to stay with ME inside.

> > > To stay out there in these stories is horrible!!!

[Guest guest]

And, let's not forget that says everyone/thing

in our dreams is us!

And, of course it's all a story...just a dream within

this dream.

Love,

Kim

--- Steve Daily wrote:

> Yes, you are correct, this topic is not 100% solved

> yet.

>

> After awakening from your dream, you said:

> " Needless to say I felt yucky inside after waking

> from that dream. "

>

> Well, what you feel inside is 100% based upon your

> story you tell

> yourself. (Creation = Think, Feel, Act, Have) per

> BK.

>

> So, based upon the story you told yourself in the

> dream, you could do

> The Work on one of the following things:

> 1. Gabi/Women/People should not flirt.

> 2. Gabi/Women/People should not flirt with my

> husband.

> 3. Gabi/Women/People should not want to be with

> someone else.

> 4. Gabi/Women/People should not want to be with my

> husband.

> 5. My husband should not enjoy Gabi/Women/People

> paying him

> attention.

>

> By the way, I and my wife taught a dream

> interpretation class for 15

> years and then back in 1998, we discovered The Work

> and that taught

> us that " stories are stories " , whether they occur at

> night or during

> the day (in fact that is just another story) and the

> only meaning

> stories have are what we give them and we have the

> choice of

> believing them or doing The Work on them.

>

> The story about the photos is merely a result of you

> still believing

> this story. As long as your believe your story, the

> world has no

> choice but to reflect the result of your belief

> right back at you.

>

> You are definitely on the right track here and I

> applaud your desire

> to rid yourself of this stress.

>

> Blessings, Steve D.

>

>

>

>

> > This topic is not 100% solved for me yet.

> > DREAM:

> > Last night I had a dream that Gabi was flirting

> with and close with

> > my husband and he was enjoying it. Then I went

> over there to do

> > something about it. And I asked her directly if

> she wants to be

> with

> > him.

> > And she said YES!

> > I told her that I knew it all along.

> > And then I woke up.

> > Needless to say I felt yucky inside after waking

> from that dream.

> >

> > Then I found more evidence.

> > My husband, and Gabi and I were all at a

> meditation retreat

> together.

> > And I took photos of the retreat teacher, and the

> location and

> photos

> > of my husband and he took some of me.

> > So, she wanted to scan the photos of the

> " meditation teacher " (she

> > said). So, I gave her the photos.

> > Later she gave my husband a CD with the photos

> scanned on it.

> > The thing that I noticed is that she scanned all

> of the pictures of

> > my husband FIRST! Not the meditation teacher.

> > Later came the meditation teacher, and who was

> last to be scanned

> it?

> > Me of course.

> >

> > Now I have to process this internally again.

> >

> > Is my dream trying to tell me that she does have

> interest in him?

> > Or, is this 100% my inner stuff that keeps wanting

> to be seen?

> >

> > Jealousy has been a problem for me. It is sooo

> painful. Like inner

> > torture.

> > And I know that I have to stay with ME inside.

> > To stay out there in these stories is horrible!!!

>

>

>