New Member Intro

[Guest guest]

Gosh, I am so sorry for all of you! I can totally relate except for the fact

that my husband isn't taking my medication. I really don't have anything to take

except Ultram and that doesn't even help me. I have to take an Ibuprofen with it

for it to help even a little..but I came home from a trip to FL back in Feb. and

found out my husband lost his job of 17 years because he failed the drug test.

Marijuana! I had been having so much trouble and pain of my own I didn't even

see it and I usually can tell that right away!

He failed one at the same co. 11 years ago and I stood by him 100% went to rehab

with him and everything. They let him keep his job under those conditions. I

made him promise never again or I would leave. Our daughter was only 5 when it

happened back then and she didn't know what was going on, but she is 16 now.

Good example huh? We have gone through hell over it and that is why his mother

has attacked me and even slandered me because I was not supportive enough. He

didn't even defend me. I get the comments like I am allowing the pain and Fibro

to happen. I just paid my house payment that is always early on the due date

today over the phone because I had to wait on his check to be deposited to pay

it. Now we are broke again. He gets paid every two weeks and I have more bills

that I don't know how I am going to pay. I had to call the Dr. and cancel my

daughter and I's(great grammar huh?) flu shots today because I couldn't afford

the $60.00 total and that is WITH insurance.

I am so sorry to dump on everyone like this but I am so distraught!! His mother

was helping us but she got mad at me and won't help anymore. I couldn't take her

crap and abuse anymore! Stress makes the pain so much worse, and every time I

have a good day and try to go, go, go and catch up on everything I end up paying

for it for days. Seems like I never catch up and I used to be such a

perfectionist. LOL Well, I feel a little better now and had a good cry...I am

going to take my daughter to Mc's for lunch. She is working at Subway down

the street and at least she is so sweet she said she would pay for it, but it

makes me feel like crap!

Sorry guys, enough about me. Thanks for being here for me, I feel like I have no

one most of the time. At least no one that wants to hear any of it.

in NC

[Guest guest]

{ Extraneous text deleted by Moderator }

Hi Kimberley:

You sure have a full plate right now and, having been there myself, I know how

lousy you must be feeling. After reading your message and about how your

husband's mother has been so much a part of the dysfunctionality of your family

situation, my first feeling was how beneficial it would be if you didn't have

her to deal with. Obviously, any help she has given you in the past had strings

attached big-time. Sounds like she is an enabler where her son is concerned and

would rather place the blame on you than on her son who is the real perpetrator.

I don't know if you have tried counseling or therapy but I can see where that

would be so valuable for you right now. If you could get therapy for yourself,

you could make the decisions you have to make with a clear mind and a sound

plan. I see a therapist on a regular basis since I know that having to cope

with constant pain leaves me without very many resources to cope with everything

else. I'm assuming your husband still does not have a job since his drug test

popped positive, so you have money issues as a huge stressor. Second, you have

a husband who is a substance abuser who would rather blame you for the problems

accruing from his addiction than face up to his own culpability. Third, you

have a mother-in-law who is a major contributor of stress in your marital

situation and she needs to be dealt with ASAP. Fourth, you have a daughter who

you want to make sure grows to adulthood as a well-adjusted person. This is

more difficult to achieve when you also have so much stress in your marriage.

Also, I think you should feel proud that your daughter is so thoughtful and

concerned about you that she would offer to take you to lunch! Don't feel like

crap - feel proud that you raised a daughter who obviously is a super person!

Well, there's my two cents for what it's worth. I've been married three times

(first was an abusive drunk and second was a skirt-chaser), so I guess you could

say I've been around the block and only have my own perspective to share. I

want the rest of your life to be free of the stress that you don't need since

you have a lot of pain to cope with. I have that pain, too, so I know what your

limits are. Please take care and hug your daughter for me.

[Guest guest]

Hi Bonnie:

Welcome to the group! I hope you will find it a place of support and

information. I also have fibromyalgia as well as panhypopituitarism. I've had

constant pain for over a dozen years and can certainly identify with your

experiences with doctors and pain meds.

It's good to have you in the group and I look forward to getting to know you.

[Guest guest]

Jami,

If you want to talk let me know..It really stinks when the one person who

*supposed* to love you can steal from you and then stand there and lie to your

face....

I have to go take my son t school

*HUGS*

[Guest guest]

Hi Bonnie

Welcome to the group. My daughter is 23 and my son is 25 and they have

finally lost the I know everything attitude. They have always been good kids

but I think you know what I mean.

Kaylene

>I have a great husband who is very understanding and supportive. He

>does all the things around the house that I can no longer do without

>complaints. My 7 year old daughter and my 15 year old son are quite

>extraordinary in their understanding and help. But my 18 year old

>judgemental daughter who knows way more than me thinks that I live

>only for my meds and nothing else. She is more self centered than

>most 2 year olds. I keep hoping that she will mature and be more

>understanding. You know the saying: THe older I get, the smarter my

>parents get.

>

>I think I have bored you all enough for now.

>

>THanks for reading. Bonnie

>

>

_________________________________________________________________

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[Guest guest]

Content of previous message edited.

Hi barbara, welcome to the group .I am sorry that pain found you here but

its a nice group. you will learn alot here and its a good place to vent. I

was working full time when i got sick now i sit here I can only get out of

bed for a few hours here and there so I only read messages mostly.I love

animals I have a cat and two dogs they are my buddys . my animals tell me

when i am getting bad and need to go to the hospital so i guess they aregood

to have around like i said welcome to the group hope you fine this group

helpful

see ya around susan L

>From: ASHADARANCH@...

>Subject: New Member intro

>>My name is Barbara I have a severe back problem. ...

[Guest guest]

Hi Barbara,

Welcome to the list. I'm sure you will find support and information

concerning your back. I also have a bad back (many surgeries) and I've found

real

community here with this group. Welcome aboard! I look forward to getting to

know you.

Kathleen in Calif.

[Guest guest]

Hi Barbara, welcome. I also have a curve in my thoracic spine that I received

as a toddler when I fell down a flight of steps. My vertebrae are shaped like

arrowheads because they didn't develop on one side. However, I can't even get a

doctor to say, ya, that might be a big part of your problem. All my

neurosurgeon said is that he can't fix it. I've also had C6 & 7 and L5S1

surgeries. I'm a skeletal mess. LOL I have fibro from all the problems.

Maxine

New Member intro

Hi

My name is Barbara I have a severe back problem.I have arthritis down my

spine I also have a severe curve of the spine I have what my doctor called a

military neck,I have a dislocated disc in my lumbar area .Also shattered both

bones

in my wrist 4 years ago and have severe pain with that . I raise miniature

horses and Bengal cats at home also have 4 boys at home ages 15,5 and twin 3

year olds. {The 3 year olds are grandsons I have had since birth} I am 42 live

in

California. Glad I found this list...Barbara

[Guest guest]

Content of previous message edited.

Hi Barbara:

I'm glad you found this group and I'm sure you'll find some support and

information here. I'm sorry you are having such a hard time with your back and

hope your doctor is trying to get your pain level under control. I have never

heard of military neck - it's certainly a curious name for a physical problem.

Does your doctor have any ideas as to why your wrist is still hurting so badly?

It must be difficult to use your hand with a painful wrist - especially with

four boys to tend to!

I'm envious that you have miniature horses! I think they are so adorable and

I'd love to have one but I'm afraid our yard is too small. I also have cats,

one Persian and one Heinz 57. I also have a terrific dog named Mandy who is my

friend and confidant.

I have two grandsons and three granddaughters and enjoy them a lot. I wish I

could see them more often but I just had Thanksgiving at my daughter's house and

so I was able to have fun with them there. My grandsons and one granddaughter

are adopted from Russia and have only been here a short time.

I'm glad to have you in the group and hope you find it as helpful as I have.

Roanoke, VA

----- Original Message -----

From: ASHADARANCH@...

Hi

My name is Barbara I have a severe back problem.I have arthritis down my

spine I also have a severe curve of the spine ...

[Guest guest]

I joined the group today and want to say hello. I also joined

another group but didn't see many participants (alot of members but

few posting) Sometimes I am in too much pain to sit at the computer

but tonight I cannot sleep so I thought I'd tell you a little about

my situation After reading some of the posts I learned quite a bit.

Also, feel so relieved that others know the feelings that come up

with chronic pain. It is nice to have you because people in my life

are compassionate but it does get old.

I have a transverse process L5, S1 compressing on my lumbar. I

slipped and fell in Walmart 2 years ago and have not had a pain free

day since. As you know, pain changes your life dramatically..

personally and professionally. I also have two bulging discs and

nerve damage that travels down my left leg after a process

called " Radiofrequency Injections " thate were hopefully to block the

pain in my back. However, it was not successful and I only gained a

new pain down my leg and across my butt into the hip/thigh.

The reason I joined is because I need emotional support around the

time that my doctor weaned my off of percocet. It was my request to

get off of the narcotics if and when the injections worked. I

thought the procedure was going to my " miracle cure " and was wrong in

a BIG way. The doctor decided he was not going to continue the meds

even though I now have increased pain as described above.

I think I am still in withdrawals.. very anxious, cannot sleep,

excriciating pain that is so hot, deep and intense I curl up to round

out my back and sob. My bowels are working again and I feel very

nutritional depleted.

There is a herbal powder called Green Defense that I mix with juice

that I hope is helping my body heal - I am on Celexa for depression

and Neurontin for anxiety (I was not prescribed this for pain - it

was given to me before the accident for anxiety and does nothing for

the spasm, pinching in my back). I hope it is OK to talk about meds

here - I did not see anything in the rules about this.

The list of doctors I have seen is orthropedic and neurosurgeons,

primary care, osteopathic, chiropactor, herablist, pain management

dr. (cortisone injections, novacaine), Lidoderm patches, physical

therapy, magnetic therapy, reiki, etc. etc. It has been a long road

and I am at the end. I do go to acupunture every two weeks to help

calm my nerves.

I know this is alot to dump on you but I have all this repressed

inside which only causes me to tense up - I do use a relexation tape

but it is hard to stay still and focus. I get up and down a lot

becasue sitting is too much pressure -

I don't know what I am asking you - just wanted to get some feedback

from those who know what it is like to suffer daily. I live only

with my cat and heating pad glued to my back (sometimes ice and

pepper patches).

Any ways to eleviate the pain would be helpful. Perhaps I should

find a new doctor but I have exhausted all the ones locally trying to

find an answer to what is wrong with me. I could go to Florida and

stay with my Dad for awhile but it is tough for me to travel. Maybe a

mysitical healer could zap the pain away

My prayers go out to you all and thank you for your support. I read

the moderators greeting to new members and it motivated me to tell

you about myself.

I look forward to meeting you online.

Luckyduck (have to remain optimistic with the name)

[Guest guest]

Extraneous Text deleted by Moderator

Hi Ladyluck:

Welcome to the group and I hope you find it very helpful and informative. You

sound like you are having to cope with an awful lot of pain and I really

empathize with how big a burden that is. I'm not sure why your doctor is so

unresponsive to your pain level but there are so many doctors who aren't very

helpful that it overwhelms me sometimes.

Did your doctor take you off pain meds for a reason? You seem to have tried so

many things that thus far haven't been too helpful. You may need to have pain

meds in order to start leading as full a life as you can. It sure would be

great if there was some sort of magic way to get rid of pain but unfortunately

we only have ourselves and our own force of will to make our lives the best they

can be.

I've started to become pretty active in pain advocacy and that has been helpful

to me as a disabled person because I feel I'm doing what I can to make a

difference for all pain sufferers. I hope you find the group as supportive as I

have and it's good to have you among us.

[Guest guest]

>>I joined the group today and want to

say hello. << snipped >> I don't know what I am asking you - just

wanted to get some feedback from those who know what it is like to

suffer daily. <<

Hi Luckyduck,

Welcome to the group! I have found an amazing amount of information,

advice and comfort here.

I also have back problems. I have been to 4 doctors this year and

every one had a different opinion as to why I am in so much pain. All

I know for sure is that I have one arthritic joint in my lumbar

spine, a protruding disc at L2-L3, and my T-12 and L-1 vertebrae have

been partially fused since birth (big surprise to find this out at

the age of 34!).

As far as relieving pain, I am on a lot of medication which mostly

keeps it tolerable. On bad days I spend a lot of time lying on the

floor with my heating pad on full blast. My physio exercises help as

I think it gets my mind off the pain. They are mostly stretching and

gentle strengthening exercises. Also I just started trying to

meditate. I haven't quite got the hang of it yet, but it's already

helping me with my insomnia. What with the pain and worrying about my

future (my disability benefits may get cut off in January, and I have

a slew of other worries surrounding my back problems), getting to

sleep is a big problem for me.

I know what you mean about suffering every day. It really wears you

down. I have good days and bad days, physically and mentally.

Sometimes I feel like my life has been utterly ruined by my back

problems, but I am trying hard to see the positive aspects of what

has happened to me. I used to be a busy perfectionist, always fussing

and worrying about little things. My back problems have really slowed

me down and given me a different perspective on life. If I can become

a more peaceful, tranquil person because of this terrible year - well

that's a good thing.

Take good care of yourself, and if you feel a little downhearted,

then just post us a note and maybe we can help.

Diane

Vancouver, B.C., Canada