Re: The Body-Mind Connection/dancing girl

[Guest guest]

Dear Dancing girl,

*Then I ran on to EFT. I had a few really amazing things happen. I

confess I was also working hard to change diet and inrease water

consumption...(the sweets are still a problem but that's what I'm

going to explore in Inquiry too).*

Tim (who is in this group) is an EFT guru...sounds like you have had

an amazing journey...

The sweets are a problem>..is it true?

When I have a sweet I know I want kisses....my Grandma used to give me

chocolate and kisses to go along with them...when I have a chocolate I

think of her...

love,

nne

[Guest guest]

nne, Thank you for the post. I have had two people contact me

from my post who do EFT, but not the Tim you mentioned (yet). I

hope he also replies. I see The Work and EFT as the dynamic duo,

smile.

Also...You pegged me on the sweets story...very good, thanks.

I remember the long, long days of fear and dissappointment as a

child...home was a very scarey place and the sweets...esp chocolate

treats were a temporary but powerful distraction, not to mention

their place as 'rewards'. They were rewards, recognition, just about

everything good, and especially the closest thing to love or comfort

possible then. They seemed to buffer the fear. I would use all my

school " milk " money to buy them...hoard them...savor them intensely

I have had intense chocolate cravings and binges now and then, and

used the EFT on it recently with some (though not every time)

specific/instant success... (EFT'r would say there are

other 'aspects' surfacing). So I'll keep tapping EFT style, but NOW

I have Inquiry as well...

I relate to your own chocolate story and suspect that

sweets/chocolate are my substutue for some kind of " kisses " that

I 'crave'.

My craving for sweets is a problem.

Is it true....yes, definitely....

Can I absolutely know that it's true? sigh no.

How do I feel when I think the thought?

I feel helplessly hooked on the stuff.

I feel I'm a victim. I'm weak.

I make war with myself. My book-learning intellect says, " sweets

are dangerous " but my whole body aches for the stuff.

The craving is a gigantic problem in my thinking and it manifests

like what I imagine craving for any drug would be. It's bigger than

me. If I give in, I'm excused...it's not even my 'fault' it's so

big, huge, out of control....(I feel something in my stomach).

I think I am flawed.. defective....Junk...(in my gut there is the

old child sensation rising)

The war wages between my 'comfort' (in spite of it's negative bodily

effect) and my own finger-wagging " know-it-all self " .

Know it all says, " stop that " .... " I know what you want but you can't

have it " .

Can I think of a reason to drop the thought, but please don't drop

it. YEs

How would I be without the thought, " My craving for sweets is a

problem " ?

I would be free of feeling like I have " a problem " or that I'm a

victim....or helpless.

I would notice the chocolate/sweets and not relate to it like it's a

drug. I would not be at war with myself.

My craving for sweets is a problem...

Turn Around:

My craving for sweets is NOT a problem.

My THINKING about sweets is the problem.

My craving for love, for self-love is the problem.

.....straight into....

I need sweets to feel good.

Is it true?

sometimes oh geez yes.

Can I absolutely know that it's true...no.

How do I live my life when I think that thought?

I am undone. I turn my happiness to something outside me. Sweets

are instantly

gratifying...predictible...delicious...cheap...replacement for

intimacy...with my husband, my friends, my family, my self. Drug

of choice. Distraction from dissappointment, frustration,

anger...Something stimulating (blood sugar rush) and total illusion

of comfort....

Misplaced way to get control of my feelings...illusion of safety.

(odd sensations here of infant stuff here...wrapped, comforted in

aching pain...it's all mixed together)

Can I think of a reason to drop the thought...and please don't dropt

it. Yes!

Can I think of a stress-free reason to keep the thought. No

How would I live my life without the thought, " I need sweets to feel

good " ?

I would (oh no...) probably find something else to take up the

slack. (my honest first response)

I would...calm down....just be with myself...calm, in the

moment...yes, very in the moment....liking, loving myself and not

obsessed with being without. (consciously or unconsciously)

I would be very....simply..content.

So turn it around: I need sweets to feel good.

I DON'T need sweets to feel good.

I need M E to feel good.

My old thinking needs sweets to feel good.

I don't (always) NEED to feel good.

I just feel good..or I don't.

Right now I feel like...

dancin'

[Guest guest]

Dear Dancing2you,

> I remember the long, long days of fear and dissappointment as a

> child...home was a very scarey place and the sweets...esp chocolate

> treats were a temporary but powerful distraction, not to mention

> their place as 'rewards'. They were rewards, recognition, just about

> everything good, and especially the closest thing to love or comfort

> possible then.

Doing the work on your worst days as a child could help with your

sweets, too. It sounds to me like the chocolate keeps you from looking

at something?

My thoughts about the work:

> My craving for sweets is a problem.

To me it makes more effect to do the work on : " I should not crave for

sweets "

> Is it true....yes, definitely....

> Can I absolutely know that it's true? sigh no.

Does it reach you? My life would be much better if I did not crave for

sweets. Can you really know that this is true?

> How do I feel when I think the thought?

How do I feel when I think the thought in the presence of craving for

sweets. How do you treat yourself?

> I feel helplessly hooked on the stuff.

> I feel I'm a victim. I'm weak.

> I make war with myself.

How do these feel?

> My book-learning intellect says, " sweets

> are dangerous " but my whole body aches for the stuff.

Your intellect and your body are not your buisness. Turn it around.

> The craving is a gigantic problem in my thinking and it manifests

> like what I imagine craving for any drug would be. It's bigger than

> me. If I give in, I'm excused...it's not even my 'fault' it's so

> big, huge, out of control....(I feel something in my stomach).

> I think I am flawed.. defective....Junk...(in my gut there is the

> old child sensation rising)

> The war wages between my 'comfort' (in spite of it's negative bodily

> effect) and my own finger-wagging " know-it-all self " .

> Know it all says, " stop that " .... " I know what you want but you can't

> have it " .

These are all stories. Turn them around.

> Can I think of a reason to drop the thought, but please don't drop

> it. YEs

>

> How would I be without the thought, " My craving for sweets is a

> problem " ?

....while you are craving for sweets?

> I would be free of feeling like I have " a problem " or that I'm a

> victim....or helpless.

> I would notice the chocolate/sweets and not relate to it like it's a

> drug. I would not be at war with myself.

Sounds like the sweets are not the problem.

> My craving for sweets is a problem...

> Turn Around:

> My craving for sweets is NOT a problem.

> My THINKING about sweets is the problem.

> My craving for love, for self-love is the problem.

You said the sweets were a kind of reward. What do they make you feel?

Could that be what you really crave for?

> ....straight into....

>

> I need sweets to feel good.

Try to stay with " I need sweets " .

> Is it true? sometimes oh geez yes.

> Can I absolutely know that it's true...no.

>

> How do I live my life when I think that thought?

> I am undone. I turn my happiness to something outside me.

> Sweets are instantly

> gratifying...predictible...delicious...cheap...replacement for

> intimacy...with my husband, my friends, my family, my self.

This sounds like what you see sweets as. Try to turn it around.

> Drug of choice. Distraction from dissappointment, frustration,

> anger...Something stimulating (blood sugar rush) and total illusion

> of comfort....Misplaced way to get control of my feelings...illusion

> of safety.

> (odd sensations here of infant stuff here...wrapped, comforted in

> aching pain...it's all mixed together)

> Can I think of a reason to drop the thought...and please don't drop

> it. Yes!

> Can I think of a stress-free reason to keep the thought. No

>

> How would I live my life without the thought, " I need sweets to feel

> good " ?

> I would (oh no...) probably find something else to take up the

> slack. (my honest first response)

Yes, so you would not have to look at what you had to look at.

So, the sweets are not the problem, are they?

> I would...calm down....just be with myself...calm, in the

> moment...yes, very in the moment....liking, loving myself and not

> obsessed with being without. (consciously or unconsciously)

> I would be very....simply..content.

>

> So turn it around: I need sweets to feel good.

> I DON'T need sweets to feel good.

> I need M E to feel good.

> My old thinking needs sweets to feel good.

> I don't (always) NEED to feel good.

> I just feel good..or I don't.

>

> Right now I feel like...

> dancin'

Take care,

[Guest guest]

> nne, Thank you for the post. I have had two people contact me

> from my post who do EFT, but not the Tim you mentioned (yet). I

> hope he also replies. I see The Work and EFT as the dynamic duo,

> smile.

Dear Dancin,

This is my work...thank you for sharing yours...good stuff...

I need sweets

> Is it true?

Sometimes I do feel this way. They are the thing that was *happy* and

*love* in my childhood...a cookie from my dad....or a chocolate from

my grandma....it means feeling special and being loved to me.

> Can I absolutely know that it's true...No. If there were no more

sweets would you die? maybe....

How do I react when I believe this thought?

Feeling like the day is ordinary and not special...that I am not special.

I'm frowning and I feel left out.

not really stressed but not really excited about the day either...

Like I am missing something and I'm not sure what....

I go to self pity mode.

Feel blue and don't want to do anything....

> Can I think of a reason to drop the thought...and please don't drop

> it. yeah.

> Can I think of a stress-free reason to keep the thought. No

>

> How would I live my life without the thought, " I need sweets " ?

I would just notice when I'm distracted by this wanting or not.

I don't need sweets would be just as true. sometimes I don't

My thinking needs sweets....oh....I like this thought!!!!!

I need sweet thinking!!!!!! Yes!!!!! lol

Sweets need me....this would be my sweet family and friends.....

oh. This is fun to play with....love,nne

[Guest guest]

...please accept my thanks for your kind and insightful

response here...I'm going to really work this over tomorrow. PS I

have noticed a distinct reduction in sweets cravings these past

hours since I wrote the post...also a sense of " inner

sweetness " ...Hmmm!

off...

Dancin

> Dear Dancing2you,

>

> > I remember the long, long days of fear and dissappointment as a

> > child...home was a very scarey place and the sweets...esp

chocolate

> > treats were a temporary but powerful distraction, not to mention

> > their place as 'rewards'. They were rewards, recognition, just

about

> > everything good, and especially the closest thing to love or

comfort

> > possible then.

> Doing the work on your worst days as a child could help with your

> sweets, too. It sounds to me like the chocolate keeps you from

looking

> at something?

>

> My thoughts about the work:

> > My craving for sweets is a problem.

> To me it makes more effect to do the work on : " I should not crave

for

> sweets "

> > Is it true....yes, definitely....

> > Can I absolutely know that it's true? sigh no.

> Does it reach you? My life would be much better if I did not crave

for

> sweets. Can you really know that this is true?

> > How do I feel when I think the thought?

> How do I feel when I think the thought in the presence of craving

for

> sweets. How do you treat yourself?

>

> > I feel helplessly hooked on the stuff.

> > I feel I'm a victim. I'm weak.

> > I make war with myself.

> How do these feel?

>

> > My book-learning intellect says, " sweets

> > are dangerous " but my whole body aches for the stuff.

> Your intellect and your body are not your buisness. Turn it around.

>

> > The craving is a gigantic problem in my thinking and it manifests

> > like what I imagine craving for any drug would be. It's bigger

than

> > me. If I give in, I'm excused...it's not even my 'fault' it's so

> > big, huge, out of control....(I feel something in my stomach).

> > I think I am flawed.. defective....Junk...(in my gut there is the

> > old child sensation rising)

> > The war wages between my 'comfort' (in spite of it's negative

bodily

> > effect) and my own finger-wagging " know-it-all self " .

> > Know it all says, " stop that " .... " I know what you want but you

can't

> > have it " .

> These are all stories. Turn them around.

>

> > Can I think of a reason to drop the thought, but please don't

drop

> > it. YEs

> >

> > How would I be without the thought, " My craving for sweets is a

> > problem " ?

> ...while you are craving for sweets?

> > I would be free of feeling like I have " a problem " or that I'm a

> > victim....or helpless.

> > I would notice the chocolate/sweets and not relate to it like

it's a

> > drug. I would not be at war with myself.

> Sounds like the sweets are not the problem.

>

> > My craving for sweets is a problem...

> > Turn Around:

> > My craving for sweets is NOT a problem.

> > My THINKING about sweets is the problem.

> > My craving for love, for self-love is the problem.

> You said the sweets were a kind of reward. What do they make you

feel?

> Could that be what you really crave for?

>

> > ....straight into....

> >

> > I need sweets to feel good.

> Try to stay with " I need sweets " .

> > Is it true? sometimes oh geez yes.

> > Can I absolutely know that it's true...no.

> >

> > How do I live my life when I think that thought?

> > I am undone. I turn my happiness to something outside me.

>

> > Sweets are instantly

> > gratifying...predictible...delicious...cheap...replacement for

> > intimacy...with my husband, my friends, my family, my self.

> This sounds like what you see sweets as. Try to turn it around.

>

> > Drug of choice. Distraction from dissappointment, frustration,

> > anger...Something stimulating (blood sugar rush) and total

illusion

> > of comfort....Misplaced way to get control of my

feelings...illusion

> > of safety.

> > (odd sensations here of infant stuff here...wrapped, comforted in

> > aching pain...it's all mixed together)

>

>

> > Can I think of a reason to drop the thought...and please don't

drop

> > it. Yes!

> > Can I think of a stress-free reason to keep the thought. No

> >

> > How would I live my life without the thought, " I need sweets to

feel

> > good " ?

> > I would (oh no...) probably find something else to take up the

> > slack. (my honest first response)

> Yes, so you would not have to look at what you had to look at.

> So, the sweets are not the problem, are they?

> > I would...calm down....just be with myself...calm, in the

> > moment...yes, very in the moment....liking, loving myself and not

> > obsessed with being without. (consciously or unconsciously)

> > I would be very....simply..content.

> >

> > So turn it around: I need sweets to feel good.

> > I DON'T need sweets to feel good.

> > I need M E to feel good.

> > My old thinking needs sweets to feel good.

> > I don't (always) NEED to feel good.

> > I just feel good..or I don't.

> >

> > Right now I feel like...

> > dancin'

>

> Take care,

>