Re: Did/do your brothers and/or sisters understand your AS?

April 29, 2008

>

> My sister has been diagnosed by a psychologist, but because a

> subsequent therapist who has no diploma says she " might not have it "

my

> sister denies her own diagnosis. But she always gives me the gears for

> my Aspie traits.

Has this more to do with her wanting to be able to side with your

parents against you on issues? Why do you thinks she denies her AS?

Kim

April 29, 2008

no, I am the designated black sheep. That also makes me the best liked

by the nephews, but they all think I am crazy and cool. The elders

would chew off digits to see me " normal " in their minds. My parents

were told I was a " genius " who lived in a fantasy world. If I would

just knuckle down I would be very successful. =$ My father especially

wants me to accomplish this, my mother is too complex to explain.

In any event for the most part I am a dissapointment.

April 29, 2008

My sisters do not but one of my brothers does because his son exhibits

signs and has a dx of PPD-NOS. My older sister is more accepting of my

quirks than my younger one but they still both become irritated with me

when I " know it all " or correct them on a subject that I am well read

about. They have not bothered to read up on it either even though I

have asked them to and not for my sake but for my son's.

Their lack of understanding is hurtful and comments were made at our

Easter get together that made me want to boot them out of my house. I

have expressed my hurt to my older sister and told her that if she

chooses to learn more, then we can talk about it. My younger sister is

having problems within her marriage and she seems very angry, so I will

not try to communicate with her about this until she is more receptive.

I have not spoken to my other brother for years.

Kim

April 29, 2008

Kim wrote: " Has this more to do with her wanting to be able to side

with your parents against you on issues? Why do you thinks she denies

her AS? "

I'm going to butt in for a second here. A few months ago, I exchanged

emails with his sister regarding her views that Autism is a punishment

from God.

She went on to state to and then to me that, as far as she was

concerned, given the choice by God, all right-thinking Autistics would

want to be healed.

Hmmmmm, and you wonder why she denies her AS? I have a couple theories.

Raven

Co-Administrator

April 29, 2008

mimi wrote: " no, I am the designated black sheep ... <snip> ... In any

event for the most part I am a dissapointment. "

Here's the good news, mimi.

You're not a disappointment to Ravi who loves you absolutely and

unconditionally. It's not just because you are his mom that he loves

you but because you are a very good mom to and for him.

Here's even more good news. You're not a disappointment to those who

truly know you as you are. In fact, you are so much the opposite of a

disappointment that you are a Co-Administrator here. I know for a fact

that this speaks loudly -- and in very positive terms -- to who you are.

A disappointment? Pffffft!

A black sheep? Well, from one black sheep to another ... it's not that

ba-a-a-a-a-a-ad being the black sheep. <wink>

Hey ... Mike ... strict ... ... you don't think black

sheep are all that ba-a-a-a-a-a-ad, do you? :-D

Raven

Co-Administrator

April 29, 2008

A few months ago, I exchanged

> emails with his sister regarding her views that Autism is a punishment

> from God.

>

> She went on to state to and then to me that, as far as she was

> concerned, given the choice by God, all right-thinking Autistics would

> want to be healed.

I remember what Tom had said about his sister's point of view on AS was

from previous conversations but I thought that his answer (or yours now)

would be informative to the members who just joined. I don't know

what's worse, knowing and denying as in Tom's sisters case or just not

caring enough to learn, as in my siblings case.

Kim

April 29, 2008

I'm an only child so I didn't have to worry about that.

In a message dated 4/28/2008 10:06:31 P.M. Eastern Daylight Time, no_reply writes:

My sister has been diagnosed by a psychologist, but because a subsequent therapist who has no diploma says she "might not have it" my sister denies her own diagnosis. But she always gives me the gears for my Aspie traits.AdministratorNeed a new ride? Check out the largest site for U.S. used car listings at AOL Autos.

April 29, 2008

I'm an only child so I didn't have to worry about that.

In a message dated 4/28/2008 10:06:31 P.M. Eastern Daylight Time, no_reply writes:

My sister has been diagnosed by a psychologist, but because a subsequent therapist who has no diploma says she "might not have it" my sister denies her own diagnosis. But she always gives me the gears for my Aspie traits.AdministratorNeed a new ride? Check out the largest site for U.S. used car listings at AOL Autos.

April 29, 2008

" Has this more to do with her wanting to be able to side with your

parents against you on issues? Why do you thinks she denies her AS? "

I think the one thing that makes my sister and I different is that

she has the desire to socialize even if she cannot actually

successfully engage in social events. I am somewhat more successful

at engaging in social events, but I have no desire to socialize.

My sister takes after my father who believes that if Aspies just push

themselves, they can fit in and adjust to the world just fine, but

for all that, no matter how hard she pushes herself, she never

manages to fit in. She HATES the fact that I don't push myself, that

I like myself, and that I can still fit in with people if I need to.

I think another part of it might be that even though she is pushing

herself to cease to be Aspie, she is still failing to live up to my

parents' expectations and this bothers her, whereas I could care less

about how my parents feel about me.

Administrator

April 29, 2008

" In any event for the most part I am a dissapointment. "

And yet, everyone here loves you.

We must ALL be dissappointments.

Administrator

April 29, 2008

"Hey ... Mike ... strict ... ... you don't think black sheep are all that ba-a-a-a-a-a-ad, do you? :-D"

Hey honey, I LIKE it when you are ba-a-a-a-d!

But I know what you mean. I think the black sheep of the world are the most interesting and actually have some of the best qualities.

Administrator

April 29, 2008

RAven wrote: " A few months ago, I exchanged emails with his sister

regarding her views that Autism is a punishment from God.

She went on to state to and then to me that, as far as she was

concerned, given the choice by God, all right-thinking Autistics would

want to be healed.

Kim wrote: " I remember what Tom had said about his sister's point of

view on AS was from previous conversations but I thought that his

answer (or yours now) would be informative to the members who just

joined. I don't know what's worse, knowing and denying as in Tom's

sisters case or just not caring enough to learn, as in my siblings

case. "

I think both scenarios are terribly sad, Kim. :-(

Raven

Co-Administrator

April 29, 2008

mimi wrote: " ... <snip> ... In any event for the most part I am a

dissapointment ... <snip> ... "

wrote: " And yet, everyone here loves you. We must ALL be

dissappointments. "

If all of us ARE disappointments, we are the still the most intriguing

group I can think of regardless of how others misperceive us. :-D

Raven

Co-Administrator

April 29, 2008

Raven wrote: " Hey ... Mike ... strict ... ... you don't

think black sheep are all that ba-a-a-a-a-a-ad, do you? :-D "

responded: " ... <snip> ... I think the black sheep of the

world are the most interesting and actually have some of the best

qualities ... <snip> ... "

I agree. You see, people are called black sheep when they refuse to

conform to the way other people think and act. The reason they

refuse to conform to the way other people think and act is because

they can see different possibilities.

Now some of those black sheep DO grow up to become mastermind

criminals and while that's not all right, it is oftentimes

understandable. That these black sheep choose a path filled with poor

choices is actually far sadder than anything else.

And some of those black sheep become the forward thinkers of their

time ... the Einsteins and Edisons of their generation.

Regardless of the path a black sheep followers, however, the mark the

black sheep leaves on the world is felt for quite some time after the