potty training hell by Penny Galloup (note to listers: this is longer than the Grapes of Wrath)

[Guest guest]

(This was originally intended just for my consultant but I decided I'd share it

all with you and maybe you could offer help again for the hundredth time.)

Hi:

So Friday I come home and he and I begin potty training at 2:30. I have him

with no underwear on. He's got the tv and his favorite movies in the bathroom.

I got licorice and Sprite. Those last two kill me cause of all the sugar and his

yeast issues. I've got fun toys and books. I've got pictures to show what to

do. I've got a great chair for him to relax in. I've got a club soda and a book

for me. Ok, let the games begin. After a half hour in there I decided to go

the suppository route. One hour later, nothing. Another suppository.

comes in for a ten minute shift while I go have leftover lasagna. Meanwhile

Kenzie is living the life of Riley. He's got no pants on...freedom to play his

horn. He's got favorite food and beverage and he's got unlimited movies after

five weeks. What's not to like. During this time he was good about peeing. I

put him on the toilet with a comfortable little insert and a stool for his feet.

I'd do that every hour shaping with the licorice. By the way, he only got the

licorce when peeing or sitting on the toilet. Finally at 8pm I put him to bed.

Did I mention the suppositories didn't work????

Day two of the hostage crisis. Did I also mention this was a beautiful weekend,

so I heard. I was in the john all weekend. Ok, so I'm thinking oh God I know

I'm going to find poop all over his room. Nope. Ok, good deal. He'll go this

morning. The routine starts again. Nothing. At 11:20 my darling daughter

needed me. I go to the kitchen, which I can see the bathroom from....I know,

gross. Anyhow while I'm taking care of her in a matter of two minutes, Kenzie

gets under the sink and gets a pair of underwear. I forgot I had any in there.

By the time I see him he's straining and I'm charging to the bathroom. I put

him on the toilet and pull down his underwear a little bit and let the poop

plopp out into the toilet. By the grace of God he had one of the few formed

poops he's ever had. I screamed joylessly but fakingly, " Kenzie you went poop

in the potty. Alright! " Now I had said several times throughout the sessions

" if you go poop in the potty we'll go to the pool. " BIG, BIG REINFORCER. So we

did just that. I get everybody around and we drive the 30 miles to the pool. I

kept saying " Kenzie you pooped in the potty so you get to go to the pool. " He

would say " pool, pool " . I'm thinking " Dear God, please let the connection be

made. "

We go home after the pool. Meanwhile I've had remove all videos. I'm

thinking that he has pooped for today and doesn't need any more videos. Also he

has always in the past asked for pants if he has to poop. So I took your advice

and bought pull-ups for just such occasion and showed them to him. I'm thinking

if I let him run around with no underwear and he has to poop again, he'll ask

for them. I have also put above my toilet pictures. First is Kenzie sitting on

the toilet, then a picture of poop in the toilet and then a picture of videos.

Because the videos are gone and he's asking for them I told him if he pooped in

the potty he would get videos.

Day three. Continuing with the shaping of sitting on the toilet with licorice

and praise of good sitting. Showing him pictures of pooping. That part was my

favorite. Nothing of the poop nature all day. Did I mention it was a beautiful

weekend and I didn't see it?

Ok Monday he goes to school. Knowing that he never has an accident at school

I'll be ready for him when he gets home. After all this is a kid that poops one

to two times per day every day. He missed Sunday so he'll poop today. He comes

home from school and I put a long t-shirt on him and no underwear. Watching him

like a hawk. It's almost 5pm and I'm preparing dinner. Oops, lost Kenzie. He

walks out of his bedroom with poop dripping down his legs. I take him into the

bathroom, clean him up and put him into a bath. I then go into his room with

terror filling my body. On our nice carpet of less than a year old, Kenzie has

deposited five piles of poop. Two of which were nicely formed and the others,

well let's just say it wasn't pretty. Needless to say, he didn't ask for pants.

So much for that theory.

HELP.. . I SURRENDER. What am I going to do? Please tell me I won't be doing

this when he's sixteen. I'm sorry this is a sad tale with no happy ending. I'm

losing it here. HELP, HELP, HELP!

Now go out there and have a nice day.

Penny