Re: projective identification/Mkg hlthy frndshps

[Guest guest]

Hi ,

I'm glad you pulled this one out. Actually, I think this is what

Ivory was posting about. I know I do this. It's a lot easier to

work on the stuff I know that I do. Sometimes I just can't see the

other stuff.

cntbreathe

> > Hi KOs,

> > Here's another one. Its on " projective identification " .

> > - Edith

> >

> > --- Re: Re: projective identification

> >

> > KOs tend to gravitate to those with dysfunctions similiar to

those

> in

> > our FOO. And, with our black/white flea, we tend to *project* our

> > goodness onto them and put them on a pedestal. KOs don't do this

> > consciously. Our fleas work at an unconscious level until we're

> able to

> > fine-tune our personality disorder (PD) radar via SWOE, UBM, and

> our

> > ModOasis list.

> >

> > There is no 'pure' BPD so KOs also attract, and are attracted to,

> NPDs

> > (Narcissists) and ASPDs (Antisocials/Psychopaths), which are

> farther out

> > on the hard-core, negative end of the PD continuum. Then,

> proceeding in

> > the other direction, HPDs (Histrionics) want KOs to watch them

> perform

> > and applaud them (Hollywood is full of HPDs).

> >

> > Those with PDs can read KOs like a book. We're codependent

> enablers.

> > Those with PDs sense our vulnerabilities and then capitalize on

> them.

> > For example, NPDs want KO's souls, and thus they lure KOs into

> cults;

> > whereas ASPDs go after KO's money and possessions. BPs, on the

> other

> > hand, want our Self. BPs are like chameleons. They're like

> whomever

> > they're with.

> >

> > For one thing, KOs are familiar with PD dysfunction (ie, it feels

> > 'comfortable') and, too, we're seeking to be rewarded (ie,

> accepted,

> > praised, whatever) like we sought in our original FOO but which

> didn't

> > happen there either.

> >

> > Thus, KOs tend to get 'hooked' *emotionally* and it becomes like

> an

> > addiction on a partial reinforcement schedule (ala Las Vegas shot

> > machines). We keep inserting emotional coins in the slot and

> pulling on

> > the lever until we eventually run out of emotional 'gas'.

> >

> > - Edith

> > Wearing my very expensive BTDT T-shirt & Hat