Guest guest Posted May 30, 2005 Report Share Posted May 30, 2005 Hi Theresa: It sounds like your nada is not going to stop on her own. I at one time looked into a restraining order because mnada would show up at my house and yell in the windows and break into the garage if I wouldn't let her in - which I didn't. She also showed up at my daughter's school. I ended up calling the police 3 times. I didn't end up getting the restraining order - because I moved into a gated community - and my daughter is not with me at the moment. But even though it wasn't physical abuse - the police told me to start documenting what was happening - including phone calls, unwanted visits, etc. The more third party reports you can get - the better. So I would ask the Bible class teacher to document what happened. It also wouldn't hurt for you to write a letter to anyone in charge of youth activities at the church or any other activities that your daughter goes to - saying that nada does not have permission to talk to - pick up, etc your daughter. In my experience, organizations pay attention to these kinds of letters. Then you have it documented that nada is not to be bothering your daughter - so when others document what happened - it can be more objective - nada didn't listen to activity leader who asked her to leave because mother of (name) has requested that she not be permitted access to (name) - or something - I'm not a lawyer. I found some very helpful websites - they are often for battered women - but they have a lot of information obout restraining orders and what you need. It differs from state to state - and I don't know where you are - so I don't have a link for you - but if you google " restraining order NAME OF STATE " you should get information about how to get a restraining order and what kind of documentation you need. Hope that helps, Take care, kath theresa wrote: > Once again, my daughter was in prayer chapel this evening b/c there is > a man who goes there that we are sort of friends with and she really > likes to go and visit with him. Guess who went to visit daughter? > yes, as in 1 night after she took daughter out of bible class. I did > not say anything last night about the Bible class incident, but I got > a feeling she would sneak to talk to daughter today at prayer chapel. > She started talking about the horses again and stuff; daughter felt > like crying. She really wanted to run away from nada. She is always > afraid she will loook mean and disrespectful to others if she tells > grandnada to go away and leave her alone. This is partly why nada > thinks daughter really wants to be with grandnada; it's just me > standing in the way. Well,fortuantely bible teacher saw daughter's > upset yesterday and will not permit that to happen again. But for > the Fri night thing my daughter likes to go to - can't stop that one > as easily. > > Well, daughter told me to call nada and tell her to stop coming to see > her like that. So I did. I called and asked nada " Why are you going > around my daughter when I am not there? " No answer. " Are you going > to stop it? " No answer. So I guess not. OBVIOUSLY She thinks > she has a right to see her granddaughter. She wrote my daughter some > stupid note about how people are supposed to be the " Simon of Cyrene " > and help a grief stricken person carry the cross. BARFFF!!!! > > Ok. If I try this restraining order thing, I mean isn't it kind of > dumb ? Who is going to take emotional abuse seriously? I don't think > some judge or court really will. I mean I can tell them my daughter > and I feel harassed and that daughter feels threatened, but will they > really take that seriously? what's going to make them believe I > ain't just someone whining about how my mother calls me more than once > a week or something. > > Even a few years agao when nada was acting crazy when I lived there > and she ran away from home, when I talked to this priest we sort of > knew about her affecting my daughter (who was then about 9 years > old),he said, " Well, does she physically hurt her? " UGH!! No, but > mind torture is worse > > Theresa Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted May 30, 2005 Report Share Posted May 30, 2005 Hi Theresa: It sounds like your nada is not going to stop on her own. I at one time looked into a restraining order because mnada would show up at my house and yell in the windows and break into the garage if I wouldn't let her in - which I didn't. She also showed up at my daughter's school. I ended up calling the police 3 times. I didn't end up getting the restraining order - because I moved into a gated community - and my daughter is not with me at the moment. But even though it wasn't physical abuse - the police told me to start documenting what was happening - including phone calls, unwanted visits, etc. The more third party reports you can get - the better. So I would ask the Bible class teacher to document what happened. It also wouldn't hurt for you to write a letter to anyone in charge of youth activities at the church or any other activities that your daughter goes to - saying that nada does not have permission to talk to - pick up, etc your daughter. In my experience, organizations pay attention to these kinds of letters. Then you have it documented that nada is not to be bothering your daughter - so when others document what happened - it can be more objective - nada didn't listen to activity leader who asked her to leave because mother of (name) has requested that she not be permitted access to (name) - or something - I'm not a lawyer. I found some very helpful websites - they are often for battered women - but they have a lot of information obout restraining orders and what you need. It differs from state to state - and I don't know where you are - so I don't have a link for you - but if you google " restraining order NAME OF STATE " you should get information about how to get a restraining order and what kind of documentation you need. Hope that helps, Take care, kath theresa wrote: > Once again, my daughter was in prayer chapel this evening b/c there is > a man who goes there that we are sort of friends with and she really > likes to go and visit with him. Guess who went to visit daughter? > yes, as in 1 night after she took daughter out of bible class. I did > not say anything last night about the Bible class incident, but I got > a feeling she would sneak to talk to daughter today at prayer chapel. > She started talking about the horses again and stuff; daughter felt > like crying. She really wanted to run away from nada. She is always > afraid she will loook mean and disrespectful to others if she tells > grandnada to go away and leave her alone. This is partly why nada > thinks daughter really wants to be with grandnada; it's just me > standing in the way. Well,fortuantely bible teacher saw daughter's > upset yesterday and will not permit that to happen again. But for > the Fri night thing my daughter likes to go to - can't stop that one > as easily. > > Well, daughter told me to call nada and tell her to stop coming to see > her like that. So I did. I called and asked nada " Why are you going > around my daughter when I am not there? " No answer. " Are you going > to stop it? " No answer. So I guess not. OBVIOUSLY She thinks > she has a right to see her granddaughter. She wrote my daughter some > stupid note about how people are supposed to be the " Simon of Cyrene " > and help a grief stricken person carry the cross. BARFFF!!!! > > Ok. If I try this restraining order thing, I mean isn't it kind of > dumb ? Who is going to take emotional abuse seriously? I don't think > some judge or court really will. I mean I can tell them my daughter > and I feel harassed and that daughter feels threatened, but will they > really take that seriously? what's going to make them believe I > ain't just someone whining about how my mother calls me more than once > a week or something. > > Even a few years agao when nada was acting crazy when I lived there > and she ran away from home, when I talked to this priest we sort of > knew about her affecting my daughter (who was then about 9 years > old),he said, " Well, does she physically hurt her? " UGH!! No, but > mind torture is worse > > Theresa Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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