KO's fleas

[Guest guest]

Hi KOs,

Someone asked awhile back about our KO " fleas " . Fleas are defined in the

WTO Guidelines as " Unhealthy behavioral responses learned while living

with a BP. " And, of course, we KOs were raised by BPs. They were one of

our two most important teachers.

Our unhealthy learned KO responses include the BP's main 'ego' defense

mechanisms - ie, splitting, projection, denial, and rationalization.

And, from my previous " PIES " post, examples include:

- Splitting (into all good vs all bad),

- Projection (blaming/shaming: " Its all your fault " stuff},

- Denial (saying, " It didn't happen that way " ), and

- Rationalization (nada told lies and rewrote history willy-nilly).

Like Lawson wrote in UBM, KOs in recovery have to re-write the nada

scripts in their heads. The easiest one for me to recognize and begin

changing early on was 'splitting'. Its like I had to turn on a monitor

in my head to recognize when I was splitting people, objects, and events

into " all good " vs " all bad " categories.

I am one of the original and now only surviving WTO KO of that group on

this list. It was very lonely and difficult for those seven years {of my

9 years here} while cutting the path to the lamp post at the end of the

tunnel. But, if I could do it, anyone can.

Scunch over Dan. If you must leave, we'll keep your seat warm for you

here.

- Edith

WTO Gal Friday & Survivor x 2