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Re: Just say No

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It's never too late!! Maybe you could go back to court and ask them

to re-open your case! :) ...though I haven't heard of many

policepeople who were very interested if if you think you deserve a

ticket - as long as they think you do. LOL

But there is always the option to plead NO CONTEST - meaning you are

not admitting guilt - you are just not fighting the charges. It costs

the same - but gives you a way to stand in your integrity at the same

time you hand over the money.

I am still not real good at saying NO. I can't remember if I ever

tried saying it when I was young. I think I was at an advantage being

the youngest child - in that if I observed my older siblings doing

something that ticked nada off - I could learn from the " mistake "

(ahem) as an observer instead of as the one that got whacked.

I've moved up to saying " maybe " through the years. But if you say

maybe when you want to say no - it just prolongs the period of

discomfort...and ties up energy that could be used in better ways.

Free

>

> > So did you get your speeding ticket on yor motorcycle? :)

>

> Hi Free,

>

> No, I got the ticket in my car while going downhill on the freeway.

I

> didn't know then how to express to the officer that I didn't

believe I

> earned it. Using black/white thinking, I accepted the ticket. My

car

> barely exceeded the speed limit while going downhill.

>

> I bought my motorcycle later - on my 50th birthday. It was the

first toy

> I ever bought myself. It was lotsa fun for awhile but I almost got

> killed on it so I eventually sold it.

>

> It was still later that I learned the power of the word " No! " I

should

> have learned to say " No! " at around 2 yo but my nada perceived my

> attempts to use that word as abandonment so she eliminated that

word

> from my vocabulary.

>

> I learned to say " No! " when I was in my 60s. I remember practicing

in

> front of the mirror. I wanted to be able to say " No! " nicely so

that I

> wouldn't hurt people when I used that word. And, when I finally got

> comfortable with it, I said " No! " (nicely) to everything.

>

> Hmmm, fun memories...

>

> - Edith

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Guest guest

It's never too late!! Maybe you could go back to court and ask them

to re-open your case! :) ...though I haven't heard of many

policepeople who were very interested if if you think you deserve a

ticket - as long as they think you do. LOL

But there is always the option to plead NO CONTEST - meaning you are

not admitting guilt - you are just not fighting the charges. It costs

the same - but gives you a way to stand in your integrity at the same

time you hand over the money.

I am still not real good at saying NO. I can't remember if I ever

tried saying it when I was young. I think I was at an advantage being

the youngest child - in that if I observed my older siblings doing

something that ticked nada off - I could learn from the " mistake "

(ahem) as an observer instead of as the one that got whacked.

I've moved up to saying " maybe " through the years. But if you say

maybe when you want to say no - it just prolongs the period of

discomfort...and ties up energy that could be used in better ways.

Free

>

> > So did you get your speeding ticket on yor motorcycle? :)

>

> Hi Free,

>

> No, I got the ticket in my car while going downhill on the freeway.

I

> didn't know then how to express to the officer that I didn't

believe I

> earned it. Using black/white thinking, I accepted the ticket. My

car

> barely exceeded the speed limit while going downhill.

>

> I bought my motorcycle later - on my 50th birthday. It was the

first toy

> I ever bought myself. It was lotsa fun for awhile but I almost got

> killed on it so I eventually sold it.

>

> It was still later that I learned the power of the word " No! " I

should

> have learned to say " No! " at around 2 yo but my nada perceived my

> attempts to use that word as abandonment so she eliminated that

word

> from my vocabulary.

>

> I learned to say " No! " when I was in my 60s. I remember practicing

in

> front of the mirror. I wanted to be able to say " No! " nicely so

that I

> wouldn't hurt people when I used that word. And, when I finally got

> comfortable with it, I said " No! " (nicely) to everything.

>

> Hmmm, fun memories...

>

> - Edith

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Guest guest

I got a ticket once for supposedly going through a red light. I told

the officer that when I went through the intersection I saw it was a

yellow light. He said " From my perspective it was red. " So what

that means is it was like the end of the month and he had not given

out his ticket quota so from his perspective I went through a red

light instead of a yellow one. Boy was that absolutely annoying!

And if I were to go to court for that, of course he would win unless

he did not show up.

Theresa

>

>

> It's never too late!! Maybe you could go back to court and ask them

> to re-open your case! :) ...though I haven't heard of many

> policepeople who were very interested if if you think you deserve a

> ticket - as long as they think you do. LOL

>

> But there is always the option to plead NO CONTEST - meaning you are

> not admitting guilt - you are just not fighting the charges. It costs

> the same - but gives you a way to stand in your integrity at the same

> time you hand over the money.

>

> I am still not real good at saying NO. I can't remember if I ever

> tried saying it when I was young. I think I was at an advantage being

> the youngest child - in that if I observed my older siblings doing

> something that ticked nada off - I could learn from the " mistake "

> (ahem) as an observer instead of as the one that got whacked.

>

> I've moved up to saying " maybe " through the years. But if you say

> maybe when you want to say no - it just prolongs the period of

> discomfort...and ties up energy that could be used in better ways.

>

> Free

>

>

> >

> > > So did you get your speeding ticket on yor motorcycle? :)

> >

> > Hi Free,

> >

> > No, I got the ticket in my car while going downhill on the freeway.

> I

> > didn't know then how to express to the officer that I didn't

> believe I

> > earned it. Using black/white thinking, I accepted the ticket. My

> car

> > barely exceeded the speed limit while going downhill.

> >

> > I bought my motorcycle later - on my 50th birthday. It was the

> first toy

> > I ever bought myself. It was lotsa fun for awhile but I almost got

> > killed on it so I eventually sold it.

> >

> > It was still later that I learned the power of the word " No! " I

> should

> > have learned to say " No! " at around 2 yo but my nada perceived my

> > attempts to use that word as abandonment so she eliminated that

> word

> > from my vocabulary.

> >

> > I learned to say " No! " when I was in my 60s. I remember practicing

> in

> > front of the mirror. I wanted to be able to say " No! " nicely so

> that I

> > wouldn't hurt people when I used that word. And, when I finally got

> > comfortable with it, I said " No! " (nicely) to everything.

> >

> > Hmmm, fun memories...

> >

> > - Edith

>

>

> Send questions and/or concerns to ModOasis-owner

> " Stop Walking on Eggshells, " a primer for non-BPs, can be ordered via

1-888-35-SHELL () and for the table of contents, go to:

> http://www.BPDCentral.com

>

>

>

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Guest guest

I got a ticket once for supposedly going through a red light. I told

the officer that when I went through the intersection I saw it was a

yellow light. He said " From my perspective it was red. " So what

that means is it was like the end of the month and he had not given

out his ticket quota so from his perspective I went through a red

light instead of a yellow one. Boy was that absolutely annoying!

And if I were to go to court for that, of course he would win unless

he did not show up.

Theresa

>

>

> It's never too late!! Maybe you could go back to court and ask them

> to re-open your case! :) ...though I haven't heard of many

> policepeople who were very interested if if you think you deserve a

> ticket - as long as they think you do. LOL

>

> But there is always the option to plead NO CONTEST - meaning you are

> not admitting guilt - you are just not fighting the charges. It costs

> the same - but gives you a way to stand in your integrity at the same

> time you hand over the money.

>

> I am still not real good at saying NO. I can't remember if I ever

> tried saying it when I was young. I think I was at an advantage being

> the youngest child - in that if I observed my older siblings doing

> something that ticked nada off - I could learn from the " mistake "

> (ahem) as an observer instead of as the one that got whacked.

>

> I've moved up to saying " maybe " through the years. But if you say

> maybe when you want to say no - it just prolongs the period of

> discomfort...and ties up energy that could be used in better ways.

>

> Free

>

>

> >

> > > So did you get your speeding ticket on yor motorcycle? :)

> >

> > Hi Free,

> >

> > No, I got the ticket in my car while going downhill on the freeway.

> I

> > didn't know then how to express to the officer that I didn't

> believe I

> > earned it. Using black/white thinking, I accepted the ticket. My

> car

> > barely exceeded the speed limit while going downhill.

> >

> > I bought my motorcycle later - on my 50th birthday. It was the

> first toy

> > I ever bought myself. It was lotsa fun for awhile but I almost got

> > killed on it so I eventually sold it.

> >

> > It was still later that I learned the power of the word " No! " I

> should

> > have learned to say " No! " at around 2 yo but my nada perceived my

> > attempts to use that word as abandonment so she eliminated that

> word

> > from my vocabulary.

> >

> > I learned to say " No! " when I was in my 60s. I remember practicing

> in

> > front of the mirror. I wanted to be able to say " No! " nicely so

> that I

> > wouldn't hurt people when I used that word. And, when I finally got

> > comfortable with it, I said " No! " (nicely) to everything.

> >

> > Hmmm, fun memories...

> >

> > - Edith

>

>

> Send questions and/or concerns to ModOasis-owner

> " Stop Walking on Eggshells, " a primer for non-BPs, can be ordered via

1-888-35-SHELL () and for the table of contents, go to:

> http://www.BPDCentral.com

>

>

>

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