KOs anger and hypervigilance

[Guest guest]

Hi y'all,

This kind of ties in with a couple of recent discussions on the

board: links about how abused children learn to become super-

sensitive to any signs of anger.

Just came across a Salon.com article elaborating on a really

interesting study I first heard about a coupe of years ago. Was one

of the first things that helped me to see my own constant vigilance

and assessing of everyone around me as a sign of the abuse (was

still in the stage at that time of wondering whether I was

exagerating nada's behaviour and being unfair to her).

http://archive.salon.com/mwt/feature/2002/11/21/abuseq_a/

The study showed that abused children are super-sensitive and always

on the lookout for signs of anger (=danger).

http://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2002/06/020618072601.htm

Sort of sad reading but know it describes me perfectly for one. Also

makes sense when I push that idea further to the way I express my

own emotions. I think that when I'm not sure of my own emotions

(negative ones) often identify and express them as anger rather than

as something else.

Nadine

[Guest guest]

Very interesting. I know so many times I misinterpret what people are

saying because I don't like thier affect but actually when I thought

about it later one woman was actually defending me, I just took her

all wrong because of the look on her face. Scarry because I wonder

if my Nada does this when I talk to her because I think the

difference is when I'm removed from a situation I will self-exam what

I may have contributed to the situation to make it go awry. Don't

think BPD's are capable of doing that... cntbreathe

>

> Hi y'all,

>

> This kind of ties in with a couple of recent discussions on the

> board: links about how abused children learn to become super-

> sensitive to any signs of anger.

>

> Just came across a Salon.com article elaborating on a really

> interesting study I first heard about a coupe of years ago. Was one

> of the first things that helped me to see my own constant vigilance

> and assessing of everyone around me as a sign of the abuse (was

> still in the stage at that time of wondering whether I was

> exagerating nada's behaviour and being unfair to her).

>

> http://archive.salon.com/mwt/feature/2002/11/21/abuseq_a/

>

> The study showed that abused children are super-sensitive and

always

> on the lookout for signs of anger (=danger).

>

> http://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2002/06/020618072601.htm

>

> Sort of sad reading but know it describes me perfectly for one.

Also

> makes sense when I push that idea further to the way I express my

> own emotions. I think that when I'm not sure of my own emotions

> (negative ones) often identify and express them as anger rather

than

> as something else.

>

> Nadine

[Guest guest]

Very interesting. I know so many times I misinterpret what people are

saying because I don't like thier affect but actually when I thought

about it later one woman was actually defending me, I just took her

all wrong because of the look on her face. Scarry because I wonder

if my Nada does this when I talk to her because I think the

difference is when I'm removed from a situation I will self-exam what

I may have contributed to the situation to make it go awry. Don't

think BPD's are capable of doing that... cntbreathe

>

> Hi y'all,

>

> This kind of ties in with a couple of recent discussions on the

> board: links about how abused children learn to become super-

> sensitive to any signs of anger.

>

> Just came across a Salon.com article elaborating on a really

> interesting study I first heard about a coupe of years ago. Was one

> of the first things that helped me to see my own constant vigilance

> and assessing of everyone around me as a sign of the abuse (was

> still in the stage at that time of wondering whether I was

> exagerating nada's behaviour and being unfair to her).

>

> http://archive.salon.com/mwt/feature/2002/11/21/abuseq_a/

>

> The study showed that abused children are super-sensitive and

always

> on the lookout for signs of anger (=danger).

>

> http://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2002/06/020618072601.htm

>

> Sort of sad reading but know it describes me perfectly for one.

Also

> makes sense when I push that idea further to the way I express my

> own emotions. I think that when I'm not sure of my own emotions

> (negative ones) often identify and express them as anger rather

than

> as something else.

>

> Nadine

[Guest guest]

> I just took her

> all wrong because of the look on her face.

I can't read faces or body language at all. I am hypervigilant, and

I panic at somebody else's anger. Nada's facial expressions,

gestures, words, and actions were inconsistent with each other, so I

didn't learn that stuff that most people learn by the time they are

3. I don't know what to be looking out for. I think if I haven't

been able to learn this in 60 years I am wasting my time to keep on

trying.

- Dan