More about my son

[Guest guest]

Thank you for the welcome and everyone else in the group. I have a

feeling I am going to learn a lot from all of you.

My son, Keegan, will be 6 in a few weeks. He was diagnosed with OCD/anxiety

disorder just over 2 months ago. He has been on Paxil the whole 2 months and

last month the doctor put him on bus-par also. The Paxil alone just wasn't

doing it. He seems to be able to handle things a lot better now. At first I

always thought that most of Keegan's " habits " centered around the bathroom. He

would only have a bm at home. If we were out somewhere and he had to go he

would hold it. Sometimes for days. He also had to be completely naked, he was

afraid his clothes would get dirty. When he was done, he'd get dressed and be

happy as a clam. Another one was that if he was taking a bath and someone

brought him a towel, he would flip out if the towel was set on the toilet. If

that happened he would not use it, and he would throw a fit until we got him

another one. There are a few others, but you get the idea.

Now, after he has been diagnosed, and I have been doing a little reading on

OCD, I find that there are many more things that he does that are because of

the OCD that I just thought he was doing to aggravate me. His socks have to be

just perfect before he puts his shoes on, if not the shoes come off and the

crying starts. He has gotten a lot better about controlling his anger over the

past month or so. Those are really the only noticeable things so far. Most of

what Keegan suffers from is he cannot stop his thoughts. Once he gets

something in his head, he just goes over it and over it and over it. He can't

make it stop. He has told me many times that he can't get the bad thoughts out

of his head. They are not always but, but those are the ones he gets upset

about and comes to me. He has come to be shaking from head to toe telling me

he can't stop thinking about something. When I ask him what, he says he

doesn't want to tell me because it is bad. Then he finally does tell me and it

is he thinks about taking a knife and stabbing himself in the heart, or things

along those lines. He is my baby, only 5 years old, why is he thinking like

this? I am on the verge of crying just thinking about it. I did not know

until a few days ago that that is actually one of the symptoms of OCD. There

have been a couple sexual things that he says he can't stop thinking about

too. This really scared me. Where does a 5 year old come up with these

things. Those are the main things right now that really stick out.

When we got the test back a few months ago and the psychiatrist was going over

everything he said that OCD and anxiety disorder are two different things, but

I haven't got past the OCD yet to find anything on the other. He also said

that with OCD there is usually ADHD or ADD that goes along with it. Keegan has

neither one of those and the doctor said that is a good news/bad news kinda

thing for Keegan because kids with ADHD or ADD usually move from one thing to

another rather quickly and quite often so the are not obsessing on one thing

for a long period of time and since Keegan doesn't have that he has a tendency

to not let things go, or it is very difficult to let them go. He also said he

tested very high intelligence wise, which he said was another good news/bad

news situation. The doctor says talking to Keegan is like talking to a 12 or

13 year old so on one hand that is good because they seem to be able to

accomplish a lot in a session but on the other hand, since Keegan does

understand so much more than most kids his age, it messes with his

perfectionism with himself and other kids his age. He knows how something

should be, yet he can't seem to get it because he is only 5 and he really has a

short fuse for other kids his age. (I don't know if that made sense, but I

tried)

So that is basically where we are right now. I am just now trying to learn as

much as I can so I am able to understand him more, and at the same time, try

not to neglect my 8 year old daughter who sometimes feels like Keegan gets all

of the attention and she gets none.

Any questions or comments are welcome.

Thanks,

--

Bobbi

/*\*/*\*/*\*/*\*/*\*/*\*/*\*/*\*/*\

Go confidently in the direction of

your dreams! Live the life you've

imagined.

-Henry Thoreau

/*\*/*\*/*\*/*\*/*\*/*\*/*\*/*\*/*\

[Guest guest]

Bobbi,

All that sounds so familiar, things parents here have dealt with so

you'll get lots of empathy and advice and stories here.

Yeah, I think it wasn't too long ago there was a discussion about

even the young kids getting those sexual and/or violent thoughts and

just how can they have them when - depending on the thoughts - they

shouldn't " know " or by age we think they shouldn't be thinking, etc.

I've asked (then worry I'm giving him ideas!) since he's so

UNtalkative but apparently something is at times going thru his head,

if he's had violent/bad thoughts (don't yet want to ask sexual! and

he's 14, maybe I should...) but he says no.

The thing about having to take off all his clothes for the bathroom -

I believe I've seen that here, and a lot of the OCD perfectionism or

sensory having to have socks/shoes right, etc.

After began his OCD 24/7 a couple years ago and I began

researching, I found so many little things he'd done always that were

apparently OCD and didn't realize. The only thing that I knew he'd

always had and was OCD was where he'd erase and rewrite to make a

letter " right " or trace over some letters repeatedly. But then I

read about reassurance questions (yep, ) and being overly

interested in their body (yep, asked about every scratch,

cut, mole, blemish, will this food give me cancer....that's partly

reassurance too I guess) and also other minor things I hadn't put

down to OCD. They just weren't really interfering with daily life at

that point (elementary school).

's OCD distracts him, I've wondered about ADD but lots of kids

with OCD don't have an ADD/ADHD diagnosis. (actually, wish

WOULD get a little hyper, the least energetic of my kids!)

Well, at least now we parents know a lot of little things are not

done to aggravate us or due to stubborness, etc., and we can look at

these things from an OCD perspective. Makes it easier to understand

but not always easier to deal with.

At bedtime has the hardest time going to bed. He seems to

easily get on during the day but bedtime is HARD! Bedtime is hard

for a lot of kids due to being tired and fighting OCD all day and no

distractions now, etc. But I still have a hard time figuring out

myself why he can just get on his bunk bed during the day and have

such a hard time at bedtime....

Keep us updated on how things are going and ask all the questions you

want. The FILES section in this group has a lot of great information

also if you haven't looked at it yet.

- still sneaking posts in at work....slow day -

> Thank you for the welcome and everyone else in the group. I

have a

> feeling I am going to learn a lot from all of you.

>

> My son, Keegan, will be 6 in a few weeks. He was diagnosed with

OCD/anxiety

> disorder just over 2 months ago. He has been on Paxil the whole 2

months and

> last month the doctor put him on bus-par also. The Paxil alone

just wasn't

[Guest guest]

Hi Bobbi,

Welcome! Having a child diagnosed with OCD is awfully upsetting and

listening to his " bad thoughts " is overwhelming, I know, but you have come to

a good place to get support! Your son's OCD symptoms are all very typical -

violent and sexual thoughts plague even young kids that would NEVER do anything

violent and have never been exposed to any sexual anything! OCD always

plagues the sufferer with the worst possible thoughts - very sensitive children

often have the violent images because they are so horrified by the thoughts of

hurting anyone. My daughter (now almost 11) has always had bad thoughts about

hurting our pets - mostly just hurting their feelings - and she is the most

loving, caring kid I've ever met. OCD never makes sense!!

I wanted to comment on two things your doctor said, and I apologize

if others say the same things. First of all, OCD and anxiety are two different

things, but OCD is an anxiety disorder. A child could be diagnosed with

other, additional, anxiety disorders but ALL kids with OCD have anxiety! This is

something that I didn't know when we first heard about OCD - I had no idea that

the compulsions of OCD are an attempt to quell overwhelming anxiety. The other

thing I'd say is that it is not true that most kids with OCD have ADHD. Most

kids with OCD *and tics* (a different variety of OCD, speculated by many

doctors to be a disorder of different neurotransmitters than " plain " OCD) have

ADHD, but that's a different story. If your son has " just " OCD, then that (in my

humble opinion) is nothing but good news!!!! ADHD with OCD is a bear to treat.

We have many, many more problems dealing with my daughter's ADHD and tics than

with the OCD itself. The meds which help most ADHD kids tend to increase

anxiety and tics - not good. My daughter is also very bright. She skipped

kindergarten and has been in the gifted program all along, but now (just

finished 5th

grade) the OCD/ADHD/tics are preventing her from even finishing most of her

school work. Your doctor may be referring to something I've read many places

which says that having OCD makes a child's ADHD less disruptive - they tend to

not be discipline problems at school because they are too worried about

everything, but the inattentiveness of ADHD is only made worse by having a

billion

things to worry about!!!

Sorry to drag on so long - I just had to argue with your doctor

about not having ADHD being kind of a good thing!

Best wishes,

, mom to Annie (almost 11) with OCD/ADHD/TS

[Guest guest]

, I have a question about something you wrote about " tic " -type

of OCD: " First of all, OCD and anxiety are two different things, but

OCD is an anxiety disorder. A child could be diagnosed with

> other, additional, anxiety disorders but ALL kids with OCD have

anxiety! Most kids with OCD *and tics* (a different variety of OCD,

speculated by many doctors to be a disorder of different

neurotransmitters than " plain " OCD) have ADHD, but that's a different

story. " -- , mom to Annie (almost 11) with OCD/ADHD/TS

I find this very interesting, because I thought they were simply " co-

morbid " . This past month, three of my daughter's friends had some

form of OCD(something in our water???): One I found out, was so

stressed at school she kept reorganizing her desk. I know she likes

things to be clean and organized, but I hadn't known that the

reorganizing had become a problem at school. The episode died down

once the girl's stress level diminished and she had some calming

visits to the guidance counselor. as far as I know, she doesn't take

meds and had no counseling. The second friend, was becoming more and

more distracted at school and had trouble getting to sleep unless her

mother constantly reassured her. It was getting worse and the final

straw was when she wouldn't get to sleep unless the appliances int he

house were all unplugged (fear they'd catch fire). She was diagnosed

with mile ADHD and OCD. She's on zoloft and is doing better.

Finally, the third girl is a PANDAS case OCD. She had symptoms from

when she was a toddler, and I've discovered she had a huge flare-up

this past fall with disruptive tics which couldn't be quelled until

she took paxil/therapy. My daughter, right now, exhibits no symptoms,

but can be obsessed about ideas (which, can be happy ones or if

stressed, worrisome ones) All of these girls are sweet, loving and a

pleasure to have around (mine too I guess!). It wasn't until we

confided in each other that we discovered there was even a problem at

some point. While some aspects with the girls were common, others

were different.

I had come to believe that anxiety in a high level can manifest in

obsessive-compulsive behaviors ( " Parenting Your Anxious Child " by K.

Manassis); and I had learned about the " classic " case which can start

in childhood and just get worse with age and of course the PANDAS-

type. I wonder if I could read about the different types/sources for

this disorder. Is there a type of OCD which is elevated anxiety? Is

there a type which is seratonin (sp) related only while others result

from constant attacks on the basal ganglia of the brain? Would you

please tell me where you found the literature on the TIC/OCD type of

OCD? I would like to pass that on to my friends.

Thanks-

NJ