Re: Child Emotional Care Influences Genetic Expression

[Guest guest]

Loved this one. I totally agree w/what it says. We tried the natural

childbirth, but ended up w/6 IVs in me b/c he was 10 days late and

all sorts of things. Oh well. Rarely are things ever ideal and it is

part and parcel of our welcome to parenthood. None-the-less, we

requested and demanded and got a room in our hospital that allowed

for co-sleeping/mother-baby bonding. The longest my baby was

separated from me was for 3 hours when the meds were wearing off me

after my c-section, BUT, we had an hour to bond after he was born

though it was a bit traumatic for us both and he didn't have the

whole easy enterance to earth (I saw how calm he was just by my

voice and I'll never forget those first moments of meeting- how he

knew me like he'd always known me and how much safer he seemed after

I held him and talked to him). Again, though, we did with what we

had and I've been nursing him and co-sleeping w/him ever since. I

can't pick him up as much as I'd like b/c a bad back and he weighs

20lbs, but he's not at all for a loss of touch and love- very

loquious little guy since I talk so much w/him.

I know I've posted this elsewhere, but there are studies showing

that the rates of infant abuse are 80% less w/breastfeeding b/c of

all this info you posted - the mothering hormones. I had the

hardest time getting my let down to happen after nada's visit and

that is yet another reason dh said she's never allowed back. I'm

glad, however, that I'm still breastfeeding my 6mos old and am going

to b/c it really calms me down too- like a drug.

I think all these things we read about before baby was born and

having such an awesome dh has really put my baby a few steps ahead

of the rest, that and being able to stay home w/him. I can really

and truly see such a difference between him and other kids who

unfortunately aren't w/mommy all day or who have moms that don't

interact or breastfeed. My friends always say how secure and calm he

is, but then now I can see 'why wouldn't he be?'. And even if he

wasn't calm and so laid back, I'd love him the same way I have- the

best way I can and with a willingness to learn and break away from

the blueprint in the back of my mind- w/love and everything that is

supporting that loving environment. AND DO WE EVER GET A RATION OF

$HIT ABOUT CO-SLEEPING. I don't care. They are babies for such a

short period of time in the big scheme of things and neither of us

believe in independece, but rather interdependence in the ways of

human relationships.

I have strong views on this, but also know that my grand-nada the

witch breastfed all six of her babies and hit then when they'd

accidentally bite her (which now as a mother of a six month old who

has two teeth, the urge still never arises in me to smack my baby

even when he has hurt me nursing- and he has b/c he's a baby and

doesn't mean to). Breastfeeding and co-sleeping alone do not make

for a loving mom, but rather a willingness to put aside one's self

and to know one's self enough to put aside one's self. That is

something I believe is impossible for the borderline mother unless

she seeks help. Even with the other post of 'corporeal punishment',

it is not enough just b/c my nada rarely hit us, but used words like

daggers in the heart- would've rather been beaten b/c at least then

we would've recognized for sure the blows coming at us. These are

things we've, meaning my brother and I, have discussed in group

abuse survivors therapies in our younger years...the difference

between physical and psychological abuse.

Thanks for posting this. It is not at all popular in our society in

my opinion, but we are trying to be true to what we feel is best for

our son and any future children we are blessed with. Luckily w/all

my years of fighting nada for the right to be healthy, the amount of

garbage we get from our well meaning friends is super easy to fend

off and defend against (mainly b/c we've done a lot of homework like

what you've posted here)

K

> http://www.mercola.com/2003/apr/9/child_care.htm

>

> Child Emotional Care Influences Genetic Expression

>

> By Cori Young

>

> A growing body of scientific evidence shows that the way babies

are cared for by their mothers will determine not only their

emotional development, but the biological development of the child's

brain and central nervous system as well.

>

> The nature of love, and how the capacity to love develops, has

become the subject of scientific study over the last decade. New

data is emerging from a multitude of disciplines including

neurology, psychology, biology, ethology, anthropology and

neurocardiology. Something scientific disciplines find in common

when putting love under the microscope is that in addition to

shaping the brains of infants, mother's love acts as a template for

love itself and has far reaching effects on her child's ability to

love throughout life.

>

> To mothers holding their newborn babies it will come as little

surprise that the 'decade of the brain' has lead science to the

wisdom of the mother's heart.

>

> According to Alan Schore, assistant clinical professor in the

department of psychiatry and biobehavioral sciences at UCLA School

of Medicine, a major conclusion of the last decade of developmental

neuroscience research is that the infant brain is designed to be

molded by the environment it encounters.1 In other words, babies are

born with a certain set of genetics, but they must be activated by

early experience and interaction.

>

> Schore believes the most crucial component of these earliest

interactions is the primary caregiver--the mother. " The child's

first relationship, the one with the mother, acts as a template, as

it permanently molds the individual's capacities to enter into all

later emotional relationships. " Others agree. The first months of an

infant's life constitute what is known as a critical period--a time

when events are imprinted in the nervous system.

>

> " Hugs and kisses during these critical periods make those neurons

grow and connect properly with other neurons, " says Dr. Arthur

Janov, in his book Biology of Love. " You can kiss that brain into

maturity. "

>

> Hormones: The Language of Love

>

> In his beautiful book, The Scientification of Love, French

obstetrician Michel Odent explains how Oxytocin, a hormone released

by the pituitary gland stimulates the release of chemical messengers

in the heart. Oxytocin, which is essential during birth, stimulating

contractions, and during lactation, stimulating the 'milk ejection

reflex', is also involved in other 'loving behaviors.' " It is

noticeable that whatever the facet of love we consider, oxytocin is

involved, " says Odent. " During intercourse both partners--female and

male--release oxytocin. " One study even shows that the simple act of

sharing a meal with other people increases our levels of this 'love

hormone.'2

>

> The altruistic oxytocin is part of a complex hormonal balance. A

sudden release of Oxytocin creates an urge toward loving that can be

directed in different ways depending on the presence of other

hormones, which is why there are different types of love. For

example, with a high level of prolactin, a well-known mothering

hormone, the urge to love is directed toward babies.

>

> While Oxytocin is an altruistic hormone and prolactin a mothering

hormone, endorphins represent our 'reward system.' " Each time we

mammals do something that benefits the survival of the species, we

are rewarded by the secretion of these morphine-like substances, "

says Odent.

>

> During birth there is also an increase in the level of endorphins

in the fetus so that in the moments following birth both mother and

baby are under the effects of opiates. The role of these hormones is

to encourage dependency, which ensures a strong attachment between

mother and infant. In situations of failed affectional bonding

between mother and baby there will be a deficiency of the

appropriate hormones, which could leave a child susceptible to

substance abuse in later life as the system continually attempts to

right itself.3

>

> You can say no to drugs, but not to neurobiology. Human brains

have evolved from earlier mammals. The first portion of our brain

that evolved on top of its reptilian heritage is the limbic system,

the seat of emotion. It is this portion of the brain that permits

mothers and their babies to bond. Mothers and babies are hardwired

for the experience of togetherness. The habits of breastfeeding, co-

sleeping, and babywearing practiced by the majority of mothers in

non-industrialized cultures, and more and more in our own,

facilitate two of the main components needed for optimal

mother/child bonding: proximity and touch.

>

> Proximity: Between Mammals, the Nature of Love is Heart to Heart

>

> In many ways it's obvious why a helpless newborn would require

continuous close proximity to a caregiver; they're helpless and

unable to provide for themselves. But science is unveiling other

less obvious benefits of holding baby close. Mother/child bonding

isn't just for brains but is also an affair of the heart.

>

> In his 1992 work, Evolution's End, ph Chilton Pearce describes

the dual role of the heart cell, saying that it not only contracts

and expands rhythmically to pump blood, it communicates with its

fellow cells. " If you isolate a cell from the heart, keep it alive

and examine it through a microscope, you will see it lose it's

synchronous rhythm and begin to fibrillate until it dies. If you put

another isolated heart cell on that microscopic slide it will also

fibrillate. If you move the two cells within a certain proximity,

however, they synchronize and beat in unison. "

>

> Perhaps this is why most mothers instinctively place their babies

to their left breast, keeping those hearts in proximity. The heart

produces the hormone, ANF that dramatically affects every major

system of the body. " All evidence indicates that the mother's

developed heart stimulates the newborn heart, thereby activating a

dialogue between the infant's brain-mind and heart, " says Pearce who

believes this heart to heart communication activates intelligences

in the mother also.

>

> " On holding her infant in the left-breast position with its

corresponding heart contact, a major block of dormant intelligences

is activated in the mother, causing precise shifts of brain function

and permanent behavior changes. " In this beautiful dynamic the

infant's system is activated by being held closely; and this

proximity also stimulates a new intelligence in the mother, which

helps her to respond to and nurture her infant. Pretty nifty plan--

and another good reason to aim for a natural birth. If nature is

handing out intelligence to help us in our role as mothers we want

to be awake and alert!

>

> Touch

>

> " The easiest and quickest way to induce depression and alienation

in an infant or child is not to touch it, hold it, or carry it on

your body. " -- W. Prescott, PhD

>

> Research in neuroscience has shown that touch is necessary for

human development and that a lack of touch damages not only

individuals, but our whole society. Human touch and love is

essential to health. A lack of stimulus and touch very early on

causes the stress hormone, cortisol to be released which creates a

toxic brain environment and can damage certain brain structures.

According to W. Prescott, PhD, of the Institute of Humanistic

Science, and former research scientist at the National Institute of

Child Health and Human Development, sensory deprivation results in

behavioral abnormalities such as depression, impulse dyscontrol,

violence, substance abuse, and in impaired immunological functioning

in mother deprived infants.4

>

> For over a million years babies have enjoyed almost constant in-

arms contact with their mothers or other caregivers, usually members

of an extended family, receiving constant touch for the first year

or so of life. " In nature's nativity scene, mother's arms have

always been baby's bed, breakfast, transportation, even

entertainment, and, for most of the world's babies, they still are. "

says developmental psychologist, Sharon Heller in, The Vital Touch:

How Intimate Contact With Your Baby Leads to Happier, Healthier

Development.5

>

> To babies, touch = love and fully loved babies develop healthy

brains. During the critical period of development following birth

the infant brain is undergoing a massive growth of neural

connections. Synaptic connections in the cortex continue to

proliferate for about two years, when they peak. During this period

one of the most crucial things to survival and healthy development

is touch. All mammal mothers seem to know this instinctively, and,

if allowed to bond successfully with their babies they will provide

continuous loving touch.

>

> Touch deprivation in infant monkeys is so traumatic their whole

system goes haywire, with an increase of stress hormones, increased

heart rate, compromised immune system and sleep disturbances.6

>

> With only 25 percent of our adult brain size, we are the least

mature at birth of any mammal. Anthropologist, Montagu

concluded that given our upright position and large brains, human

infants are born prematurely while our heads can still fit through

the birth canal, and that brain development must therefore extend

into postnatal life. He believed the human gestation period to

actually be eighteen months long--nine in the womb and another nine

outside it, and that touch is absolutely vital to this time

of " exterogestation. " 7

>

> Newborns are born expecting to be held, handled, cuddled, rubbed,

kissed, and maybe even licked! All mammals lick their newborns

vigorously, off and on, during the first hours and days after birth

in order to activate their sensory nerve endings, which are involved

in motor movements, spatial, and visual orientation. These nerve

endings cannot be activated until after birth due to the insulation

of the watery womb environment and the coating of vernix casseus on

the baby's skin.

>

> Recall Dr. Janov's claim that you can kiss a brain into maturity.

Janov believes that very early touch is central to developing a

healthy brain. " Irrespective of the neurojuices involved, it is

clear that lack of love changes the chemicals in the brain and can

eventually change the structure of that brain. "

>

> Breastfeeding: Liquid Love

>

> Breastfeeding neatly brings together nourishment for baby with the

need for closeness shared by mother and child; and is another

crucial way that mother's love helps shape baby's brain. Research

shows that breastmilk is the perfect " brain food, " essential for

normal brain development, particularly, those brain processes

associated with depression, violence, and social and sexual

behaviors.8

>

> Mother's milk, a living liquid, contains just the right amount of

fatty acids, lactose, water, and amino acids for human digestion,

brain development, and growth. It also contains many immunities a

baby needs in early life while her own immune system is maturing.

One more instance of mother extending her own power (love) to her

developing child.

>

> Limbic Regulation: The Loop of Love

>

> Another key to understanding how a mother's love shapes the

emerging capacities of her infant is what doctors , Fari

Amini, and Lannon, authors of A General Theory of Love, call

limbic regulation; a mutually synchronizing hormonal exchange

between mother and child which serves to regulate vital rhythms.

>

> Human physiology, they say, does not direct all of its own

functions; it is interdependent. It must be steadied by the physical

presence of another to maintain both physical and emotional

health. " Limbic regulation mandates interdependence for social

mammals of all ages, " says , " But young mammals are in special

need of it's guidance: their neural systems are not only immature

but also growing and changing. One of the physiologic processes that

limbic regulation directs, in other words, is the development of the

brain itself--and that means attachment determines the ultimate

nature of a child's mind. "

>

> A baby's physiology is maximally open-loop: without limbic

regulation, vital rhythms collapse posing great danger, even death.

>

> The regulatory information required by infants can alter hormone

levels, cardiovascular function, sleep rhythms, immune function, and

more. , et al contend that the steady piston of mother's heart

along with the regularity of her breathing coordinate the ebb and

flow of an infant's young internal rhythms. They believe sleep to be

an intricate brain rhythmthat the neurally immature infant must

first borrow from parents. " Although it sounds outlandish to some

American ears, exposure to parents can keep a sleeping baby alive. "

>

> The Myth of Independence

>

> This interdependence mandated by limbic regulation is vital during

infancy, but it's also something we need throughout the rest of

childhood and on into adulthood. In many ways, humans cannot be

stable on their own--we require others to survive.

>

> Recall that our nervous systems are not self-contained; they link

with those of the people close to us in a silent rhythm that helps

regulate our physiology. This is not a popular notion in a culture

that values independence over interdependence. However, as a society

that cherishes individual freedoms more than any other, we must

respect the process whereby autonomy develops.

>

> Children require ongoing neural synchrony from parents in order

for their natural capacity for self-directedness to emerge. A

mother's love is a continuous shaping force throughout childhood and

requires an adequate stage of dependency. The work of Ainsworth

has shown that maternal responsiveness and close bodily contact lead

to the unfolding of self-reliance and self confidence.9 Because our

culture does not sufficiently value interpersonal relationships, the

mother/child bond is not recognized and supported as it could be.

>

> The ability of a mother to read the emotional state of her child

is older than our own species, and is essential to our survival,

health and happiness. We are reminded of this each time a hurt child

changes from sad/scared/angry to peaceful in our loving embrace.

Warm human contact generates the internal release of opiates, making

mother's love a powerful anodyne.

>

> Even teenagers who sometimes behave as if they are 'so over' the

need for a mother's affection must be kept in the limbic loop.

Children at this age might be at special risk for falling through

the emotional cracks. If they don't get the emotional regulation

that family relationships are designed to provide, their hungry

brains may seek ineffectual substitutes like drugs and alcohol.

>

> Children left too long under the electronic stewardship of

television, video games, etc., are not receiving the steady limbic

connection with a resonant parent. Without this a child cannot

internalize emotional balance properly.

>

> Our hearts and brains are hardwired for love, and from infancy to

old age our health and happiness depend on receiving it.

>

> As the research keeps coming in and we gain a gradually expanding

vision of how mother love shapes our species, we see an obvious need

to take steps to protect and provide for the mother/child bond. We

can take heart knowing that all the while we carry in our genes over

a million years of evolutionary refinements equipping us for our

role as mothers. The answers sought by science beat steadily within

our own hearts.

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

greg,

awesome article. thank you for posting it on here. it reinforces

everything i've always believed and added a whole lot more.

i'm a HUGE advocate for natural childbirth (when possible of

course); staying at home with new babies; sleeping with them;

nursing them; having plenty of quiet, private time with them.

which leads me to think that if these behaviors come from how WE

were treated as infants, my nada must've been an ok mom when i was

born.

karen

[Guest guest]

cathy,

i was just relating to what the article said and applying it to my

relationship with my nada.

i've also always firmly believed that we turn out just fine if we

are nurtured by SOMEONE and that it doesn't have to be the birth

mother. too many happy adopted kids out there.

or maybe you weren't nurtured like you should have been and you've

become a great mom out of sheer determination to NOT do what your

nada did. that has certainly always been in the back of MY mind when

dealing with my kids.

and good for you for being such a good mom. you rock

karen

> ,

> I also had natural birth, nursed my babies for a year minimum.

stayed home.

> I'm a great mom. nada however was knocked out when I was born and

turned me

> over to a Swiss nanny. then she had a nervous breakdown and was

hospitalized.

> the beginning of many. I don't see any relationship between my

ability and

> hers.

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

Thanks Greg. That was a good article. I tried to read it before - but

my brain always zoned out. Today - I read it. It speaks a lot of our

buried memories and the effect they have on us.

For some reason I still have trouble accessing many memories.

Sometimes I get just a HINT of one before it blocks. I am told they

come out when they are ready. I do hope so.

Free

> Here's a link to the long version of the Enlightened Witness

article which

> I've posted several times before,

> Alice : The Childhood Trauma

> http://www.vachss.com/guest_dispatches/alice_miller2.html

>

> Re: Re: Child Emotional Care Influences Genetic

> Expression

>

>

> > ,

> > I agree.

> >

> > As usual, substitute " emotional violence " for " violence " in the

below

> > article.

> >

> > THE ESSENTIAL ROLE OF AN ENLIGHTENED WITNESS IN SOCIETY

> > http://www.naturalchild.com/alice_miller/witness.html

> > by Alice , Ph.D.

> >

> > Since adolescence I have always wondered why people take pleasure

in

> > humiliating others. Clearly the fact that some people are

sensitive to the

> > suffering of others proves that the destructive urge is not a

universal

> > aspect of human nature. So why do some tend to solve their

problems by

> > violence while others don't?

> >

> > Philosophy failed to answer my question, and the Freudian theory

of the

> > death wish has never convinced me. It was only by closely

examining the

> > childhood histories of murderers, especially mass murderers, that

I began

> to

> > comprehend the roots of good and evil: not in the genes, as

commonly

> > believed, but often in the earliest days of life. Today, it is

> inconceivable

> > to me that a child who comes into the world among attentive,

loving and

> > protective parents could become a predatory monster. And in the

childhood

> of

> > the murderers who later became dictators, I have always found a

> nightmarish

> > horror, a record of continual lies and humiliation, which upon the

> > attainment of adulthood, impelled them to acts of merciless

revenge on

> > society. These vengeful acts were always garbed in hypocritical

> ideologies,

> > purporting that the dictator's exclusive and overriding wish was

the

> > happiness of his people. In this way, he unconsciously emulated

his own

> > parents who, in earlier days, had also insisted that their blows

were

> > inflicted on the child for his own good. This belief was extremely

> > widespread a century ago, particularly in Germany.

> >

> > I found it logical that a child beaten often would quickly pick

up the

> > language of violence. For him, this language became the only

effective

> means

> > of communication available. Yet what I found to be logical was

apparently

> > not so to most people.

> >

> > When I began to illustrate my thesis by drawing on the examples

of Hitler

> > and Stalin, when I tried to expose the social consequences of

child abuse,

> I

> > encountered fierce resistance. Repeatedly I was told, " I, too,

was a

> > battered child, but that didn't make me a criminal. " When I asked

for

> > details about their childhood, I was always told of a person who

loved

> them,

> > but was unable to protect them. Yet through his or her presence,

this

> person

> > gave them a notion of trust, and of love.

> >

> > I call these persons helping witnesses. Dostoyevsky, for

instance, had a

> > brutal father, but a loving mother. She wasn't strong enough to

protect

> him

> > from his father, but she gave him a powerful conception of love,

without

> > which his novels would have been unimaginable. Many have also

been lucky

> > enough to find enlightened and courageous witnesses, people who

helped

> them

> > to recognize the injustices they suffered, to give vent to their

feelings

> of

> > rage, pain and indignation at what happened to them. These

persons never

> > became criminals.

> >

> > Anyone addressing the problem of child abuse is likely to be

faced with a

> > very strange finding: it has frequently been observed that

parents who

> abuse

> > their children tend to mistreat and neglect them in ways

resembling their

> > own treatment as children, without any conscious memory of their

own

> > experiences. It is well known that fathers who bully their

children

> through

> > sexual abuse are usually unaware that they had themselves

suffered the

> same

> > abuse. It is only in therapy, even if ordered by the courts, that

they

> > discover, stupefied, their own history, and realize thereby that

for years

> > they have attempted to act out their own scenario, just to get

rid of it.

> >

> > How can this be explained? After studying the matter for years,

it seems

> > clear to me that information about abuse inflicted during

childhood is

> > recorded in our body cells as a sort of memory, linked to

repressed

> anxiety.

> > If, lacking the aid of an enlightened witness, these memories

fail to

> break

> > through to consciousness, they often compel the person to violent

acts

> that

> > reproduce the abuse suffered in childhood, which was repressed in

order to

> > survive. The aim is to avoid the fear of powerlessness before a

cruel

> adult.

> > This fear can be eluded momentarily by creating situations in

which one

> > plays the active role, the role of the powerful, towards a

powerless

> person.

> >

> > But this is not an easy path to rid oneself of unconscious fears.

And this

> > is why the offense is ceaselessly repeated. A steady stream of

new victims

> > must be found, as recently demonstrated by the pedophile scandals

in

> > Belgium. To his dying day, Hitler was convinced that only the

death of

> every

> > single Jew could shield him from the fearful and daily memory of

his

> brutal

> > father. Since his father was half Jewish, the whole Jewish people

had to

> be

> > exterminated. I know how easy it is to dismiss this

interpretation of the

> > Holocaust, but I honestly haven't yet found a better one.

Besides, the

> case

> > of Hitler shows that hatred and fear cannot be resolved through

power,

> even

> > absolute power, as long as the hatred is transferred to

scapegoats. On the

> > contrary, if the true cause of the hatred is identified, is

experienced

> with

> > the feelings that accompany this recognition, blind hatred of

innocent

> > victims can be dispelled. Sex criminals stop their depredations

if they

> > manage to overcome their amnesia and mourn their tragic fate,

thanks to

> the

> > empathy of an enlightened witness. Old wounds can be healed if

exposed to

> > the light of day. But they cannot be repudiated by revenge.

> >

> > A Japanese crew shot a film of therapeutic work in a prison in

Arizona,

> > where the method was based, inter alia, on my books. I was sent

the video

> > cassette and found the results very revealing. The inmates worked

in

> groups,

> > talked a lot about their childhood, and some of them said, " I've

been all

> > over the place, and killed innocent people to avoid the feelings

I have

> > today. But I know that I can bear these feelings in the group,

where I

> feel

> > safe. I no longer need to run around and kill, I'm at home here, I

> recognize

> > what happened. The past recedes, and my anger along with it. "

> >

> > For this process to succeed, the adult who has grown up without

helping

> > witnesses in his childhood needs the support of enlightened

witnesses,

> > people who have understood and recognized the consequences of

child abuse.

> > In an informed society, adolescents can learn to verbalize their

truth and

> > to discover themselves in their own story. They will not need to

avenge

> > themselves violently for their wounds, or to poison their systems

with

> > drugs, if they have the luck to talk to others about their early

> > experiences, and succeed in grasping the naked truth of their own

tragedy.

> > To do this, they need assistance from persons aware of the

dynamics of

> child

> > abuse, who can help them address their feelings seriously,

understand them

> > and integrate them, as part of their own story, instead of

avenging

> > themselves on the innocent.

> >

> > I have wrongly been attributed the thesis according to which

every victim

> > inevitably becomes a persecutor, a thesis that I find totally

false,

> indeed

> > absurd. It has been proved that many adults have had the good

fortune to

> > break the cycle of abuse through knowledge of their past. Yet I

can

> > certainly aver that I have never come across persecutors who

weren't

> victims

> > in their childhood, though most of them don't know it because

their

> feelings

> > are repressed. The less these criminals know about themselves.

the more

> > dangerous they are to society. So I think it is crucial for the

therapist

> to

> > grasp the difference between the statement, " every victim

ultimately

> becomes

> > a persecutor, " which is false, and " every persecutor was a victim

in his

> > childhood, " which I consider true. The problem is that, feeling

nothing,

> he

> > remembers nothing, realizes nothing, and this is why surveys

don't always

> > reveal the truth. Yet the presence of a warm, enlightened

witness -

> > therapist, social aid worker, lawyer, judge - can help the

criminal unlock

> > his repressed feelings and restore the unrestricted flow of

consciousness.

> > This can initiate the process of escape from the vicious circle

of amnesia

> > and violence.

> >

> >

> > ------------------------------------------------------------------

--------

> --

> > ----

> >

> > © Alice , 1997.

> >