Re: Do nada's lack 'love potion'?

[Guest guest]

Hi Edith,

I'm going to go completely nuts here and make a few conjectures from

this information. My work requires me to make abnormal associations

in the hope of finding something new so I tend to think this way.

Keep in mind that these are only conjectures - don't shoot the

conjecturer, or is that conjurer?

> A new study of young mothers by researchers at University College

> London (UCL) has shown that romantic and maternal love activate many

> of the same specific regions of the brain

One of the main complaints from divorced women who actually want the

former spouse to have contact with the children is that contact tends

to diminish with time.

In a book by Judith Wallerstein(sic?) she writes that in studying the

history of divorces over a 10 year period that a majority of the men

who were divorced by their wives tended toward losing contact with

children altogether over time. She didn't make any distinction

between the wives who encouraged contact with the children or did

their best to destroy it.

If the brain is affected in the same way for romantic love as for

maternal love, is it possible that the reason men tend to lose

contact with children after a divorce is simply that the mother has

the majority of the contact and that contact is necessary to maintain

the relationship? Would this be similar to ending a love relationship

and having the feelings simply fade with time as most of us have

experienced?

That brings up a host of questions:

1. Since a man does not have the gestation period or first contact

with a child, then does he need to be directly involved with the care

of the child so that he " falls in love " (in the emotional sense) with

the child?

2. If so, then would a spouse who insists on doing the majority of

the care be creating an instability in the family by retarding that

bonding?

3. If the spouse with custody or any social agency restricts contact

of children with a spouse, could that be expected to create a bias

toward eventual loss of both emotional and financial support by the

excluded spouse? That is, we don't tend to spend time or money on

those we don't love dearly.

4. Could knowing that the brain reacts much the same to romantic and

maternal love be a basis for using non-contact with one parent as a

weapon to end the relationship with the children? Or could it be used

by a judicial system to purposely end a relationship with a parent?

5. Is it possible that nadas/fadas don't " fall in love " with their

children but see the children as something else, like an extension of

themselves, who they don't really like? Being an extension could

explain some boundary problems.

This looks like a two-edged sword of information. It seems that it

can be used as evidence to encourage policies that require both

parents to be actively involved with children, and as a mechanism to

get rid of one, or, in the case of State intervention, both parents.

The assumption could be that losing children is the equivalent of

losing a marriage partner, and though never lost to memory, the pain

of the loss will diminish to reasonable levels in time(or the same

permanent emotional disablility will occur that might happen say at

the death of a beloved spouse) Maybe it would depend on the person?

I don't really believe any of this, it's just conjectures that may

have some truth, or, maybe none.

I know a man whose somewhat BP mother divorced his father when he was

about 2 and then married another person. They moved to where the

original father would have trouble getting to the son and later

arranged to " eliminate " the influence of the original father by

trading no child support for no contact. The son is now an adult and

very angry at both mother and step-dad for " cheating " him out of

contact with his real father who by then had died. I'm not certain

about the justification for these kind of things, but I do know that

the Son's anger has transferred into his own family/children and the

dysfunction continues.

> <<

> Public release date: 13-Feb-2004

>

> Contact: Dominique Fourniol

> d.fourniol@u...

> 44-

> University College London

>

> UCL study establishes common biological ground for maternal and

> romantic love in humans

>

> A new study of young mothers by researchers at University College

> London (UCL) has shown that romantic and maternal love activate many

> of the same specific regions of the brain, and lead to a suppression

> of neural activity associated with critical social assessment of

other

> people and negative emotions. The findings suggest that once one is

> closely familiar with a person, the need to assess the character and

> personality of that person is reduced, and bring us closer to

> explaining why, in neurological terms, 'love makes us blind.'

>

> In the experiment, published in February's NeuroImage online preview

> edition, the brains of 20 young mothers were scanned while they

viewed

> pictures of their own children, children they were acquainted with,

> and adult friends, to control for feelings of familiarity and

> friendship (the brain regions involved in romantic love having been

> identified by the authors in an earlier study).

>

> The similarity of the activity recorded in this study compared to

> those obtained in the earlier study was striking; with activity in

> several regions of the brain overlapping precisely in the two

studies.

> In summary, the findings showed that both types of love activate

> specific regions in the reward system, while reducing activity in

the

> systems necessary for making negative judgements.

>

> The new results demonstrated also that the mechanisms of love are

> similar in animals and humans, and that the brain regions activated

> are the same ones as respond to the brain-produced drugs oxytocin

and

> vasopressin. These neurohormones have been shown in animals to be

both

> sufficient and necessary to induce both mother-infant bonding and

> male-female bonding. The new research therefore provides a link to

the

> previous work on animals, showing that the same 'love-potion,'

> produced by the brain, known to work in animals is also at work in

humans.

>

> " Both romantic and maternal love are highly rewarding experiences

that

> are linked to the perpetuation of the species, and consequently

have a

> closely linked biological function of crucial evolutionary

> importance, " said s Bartels, of UCL's Wellcome Department of

> Imaging Neuroscience. " Yet almost nothing is known about their

neural

> correlates in the human.

>

> " Our research enables us to conclude that human attachment employs a

> push-pull mechanism that overcomes social distance by deactivating

> networks used for critical social assessment and negative emotions,

> while it bonds individuals through the involvement of the reward

> circuitry (regions in the brain that induce euphoric feelings),

> explaining the power of love to motivate and exhilerate. "

>

> >>

[Guest guest]

,

I am not Edith, but I would like to tell you my experience with my own son,

brothers, & husband.

Son was taken by spouse & his parents then a divorce ensued. I maintained my

love for my child all these years. He was 3 the last time I saw him. He has

no memory of me at all. I am trying to build on nothing. I feel like we are

getting somewhere, if his stupid wife would leave him alone. I am wondering

whether she is BPD or not. She sure seems like it to me.

I have 3 brothers who certainly have no contact with their children &

definitely miss them badly. The lack of contact is that some of his are out

of state. The lack of contact with some of his others is that his ex is a

real witch to put it nicely & altho they have been split up a while, this

person is constantly on his butt & telling him where he screwed up with her.

Which is kind of strange for her to do. Since she screwed around on him & he

was faithful to her, as well as did his duty by supporting them as best he

could.

SO... to be honest, what I feel is this----

A fathers love doesn't necessarily start at first sight but actually begins

to grow & become real to him with the first interaction with the baby. It

could be when the woman was pregnant with the child or at the baby's birth,

as my husbands was with ours, or even later. But I feel like the attachment

is for life even on the fathers part.

As for your friend you could have been describing one of my brothers sons.

Until I saw that your friends dad had died I could have sworn you knew my

brothers son. I hope that my brother gets off his butt soon & goes to look

for his boy. I wouldn't want that to happen to him. But I also know that he

is terrified to death & feels like it is too late for him to ever have

contact again. Perhaps not not though & I will tell him the story you

mentioned without telling anything about where I heard it.

Debbie

Re: Do nada's lack 'love potion'?

> Hi Edith,

>

> I'm going to go completely nuts here and make a few conjectures from

> this information. My work requires me to make abnormal associations

> in the hope of finding something new so I tend to think this way.

> Keep in mind that these are only conjectures - don't shoot the

> conjecturer, or is that conjurer?

>

> > A new study of young mothers by researchers at University College

> > London (UCL) has shown that romantic and maternal love activate many

> > of the same specific regions of the brain

>

> One of the main complaints from divorced women who actually want the

> former spouse to have contact with the children is that contact tends

> to diminish with time.

>

> In a book by Judith Wallerstein(sic?) she writes that in studying the

> history of divorces over a 10 year period that a majority of the men

> who were divorced by their wives tended toward losing contact with

> children altogether over time. She didn't make any distinction

> between the wives who encouraged contact with the children or did

> their best to destroy it.

>

> If the brain is affected in the same way for romantic love as for

> maternal love, is it possible that the reason men tend to lose

> contact with children after a divorce is simply that the mother has

> the majority of the contact and that contact is necessary to maintain

> the relationship? Would this be similar to ending a love relationship

> and having the feelings simply fade with time as most of us have

> experienced?

>

> That brings up a host of questions:

>

> 1. Since a man does not have the gestation period or first contact

> with a child, then does he need to be directly involved with the care

> of the child so that he " falls in love " (in the emotional sense) with

> the child?

>

> 2. If so, then would a spouse who insists on doing the majority of

> the care be creating an instability in the family by retarding that

> bonding?

>

> 3. If the spouse with custody or any social agency restricts contact

> of children with a spouse, could that be expected to create a bias

> toward eventual loss of both emotional and financial support by the

> excluded spouse? That is, we don't tend to spend time or money on

> those we don't love dearly.

>

> 4. Could knowing that the brain reacts much the same to romantic and

> maternal love be a basis for using non-contact with one parent as a

> weapon to end the relationship with the children? Or could it be used

> by a judicial system to purposely end a relationship with a parent?

>

> 5. Is it possible that nadas/fadas don't " fall in love " with their

> children but see the children as something else, like an extension of

> themselves, who they don't really like? Being an extension could

> explain some boundary problems.

>

> This looks like a two-edged sword of information. It seems that it

> can be used as evidence to encourage policies that require both

> parents to be actively involved with children, and as a mechanism to

> get rid of one, or, in the case of State intervention, both parents.

>

> The assumption could be that losing children is the equivalent of

> losing a marriage partner, and though never lost to memory, the pain

> of the loss will diminish to reasonable levels in time(or the same

> permanent emotional disablility will occur that might happen say at

> the death of a beloved spouse) Maybe it would depend on the person?

>

> I don't really believe any of this, it's just conjectures that may

> have some truth, or, maybe none.

>

> I know a man whose somewhat BP mother divorced his father when he was

> about 2 and then married another person. They moved to where the

> original father would have trouble getting to the son and later

> arranged to " eliminate " the influence of the original father by

> trading no child support for no contact. The son is now an adult and

> very angry at both mother and step-dad for " cheating " him out of

> contact with his real father who by then had died. I'm not certain

> about the justification for these kind of things, but I do know that

> the Son's anger has transferred into his own family/children and the

> dysfunction continues.

>

[Guest guest]

Very interesting. In a 'perpetuation of the species context' might this be a

partial explanation, survival instinct, of KOs ability to separate without

guilt from Nadas/Fadas? We have no chemical memory of their love; BP parent

didn't invest in 'knowing' their children. Carol

In a message dated 4/10/04 7:45:22 AM Eastern Daylight Time,

psyprof@... writes:

Public release date: 13-Feb-2004

Contact: Dominique Fourniol

d.fourniol@...

44-

University College London

UCL study establishes common biological ground for maternal and

romantic love in humans

A new study of young mothers by researchers at University College

London (UCL) has shown that romantic and maternal love activate many

of the same specific regions of the brain, and lead to a suppression

of neural activity associated with critical social assessment of other

people and negative emotions. The findings suggest that once one is

closely familiar with a person, the need to assess the character and

personality of that person is reduced, and bring us closer to

explaining why, in neurological terms, 'love makes us blind.'

In the experiment, published in February's NeuroImage online preview

edition, the brains of 20 young mothers were scanned while they viewed

pictures of their own children, children they were acquainted with,

and adult friends, to control for feelings of familiarity and

friendship (the brain regions involved in romantic love having been

identified by the authors in an earlier study).

The similarity of the activity recorded in this study compared to

those obtained in the earlier study was striking; with activity in

several regions of the brain overlapping precisely in the two studies.

In summary, the findings showed that both types of love activate

specific regions in the reward system, while reducing activity in the

systems necessary for making negative judgements.

The new results demonstrated also that the mechanisms of love are

similar in animals and humans, and that the brain regions activated

are the same ones as respond to the brain-produced drugs oxytocin and

vasopressin. These neurohormones have been shown in animals to be both

sufficient and necessary to induce both mother-infant bonding and

male-female bonding. The new research therefore provides a link to the

previous work on animals, showing that the same 'love-potion,'

produced by the brain, known to work in animals is also at work in humans.

" Both romantic and maternal love are highly rewarding experiences that

are linked to the perpetuation of the species, and consequently have a

closely linked biological function of crucial evolutionary

importance, " said s Bartels, of UCL's Wellcome Department of

Imaging Neuroscience. " Yet almost nothing is known about their neural

correlates in the human.

" Our research enables us to conclude that human attachment employs a

push-pull mechanism that overcomes social distance by deactivating

networks used for critical social assessment and negative emotions,

while it bonds individuals through the involvement of the reward

circuitry (regions in the brain that induce euphoric feelings),

explaining the power of love to motivate and exhilerate. "

[Guest guest]

Hi ,

Hmmm, I can't respond to your conjectures. I'm not familiar with

the divorce info such as is in Judith Wallerstein's book. Dunno

how many men or women with BPD were in her study. BPD is, of

course, my main interest here.

I think the 2 yo you mentioned in the last paragraph, who is

angry at his mother and step-father for preventing him from

knowing (and identifying with) his deceased real father is

totally justified in his anger. And, yes, that's one way FOO

dysfunction is passed on from one generation to the next.

We have an Oasan on one of these lists whose nada married 7

times altogether. And that Oasan, too, never did get to meet her

real father, who passed away. She's now in contact with members

of his family and is having very satisfying interactions with them.

I'm surprised you're the only one who responded to my 'love

potion' post. I'll discuss the parts that I felt were relevant

in another email to follow this one.

- Edith

ripplevac wrote:

> Hi Edith,

>

> I'm going to go completely nuts here and make a few conjectures from

> this information. My work requires me to make abnormal associations

> in the hope of finding something new so I tend to think this way.

> Keep in mind that these are only conjectures - don't shoot the

> conjecturer, or is that conjurer?

>

>

>>A new study of young mothers by researchers at University College

>>London (UCL) has shown that romantic and maternal love activate many

>>of the same specific regions of the brain

>

>

> One of the main complaints from divorced women who actually want the

> former spouse to have contact with the children is that contact tends

> to diminish with time.

>

> In a book by Judith Wallerstein(sic?) she writes that in studying the

> history of divorces over a 10 year period that a majority of the men

> who were divorced by their wives tended toward losing contact with

> children altogether over time. She didn't make any distinction

> between the wives who encouraged contact with the children or did

> their best to destroy it.

>

> If the brain is affected in the same way for romantic love as for

> maternal love, is it possible that the reason men tend to lose

> contact with children after a divorce is simply that the mother has

> the majority of the contact and that contact is necessary to maintain

> the relationship? Would this be similar to ending a love relationship

> and having the feelings simply fade with time as most of us have

> experienced?

>

> That brings up a host of questions:

>

> 1. Since a man does not have the gestation period or first contact

> with a child, then does he need to be directly involved with the care

> of the child so that he " falls in love " (in the emotional sense) with

> the child?

>

> 2. If so, then would a spouse who insists on doing the majority of

> the care be creating an instability in the family by retarding that

> bonding?

>

> 3. If the spouse with custody or any social agency restricts contact

> of children with a spouse, could that be expected to create a bias

> toward eventual loss of both emotional and financial support by the

> excluded spouse? That is, we don't tend to spend time or money on

> those we don't love dearly.

>

> 4. Could knowing that the brain reacts much the same to romantic and

> maternal love be a basis for using non-contact with one parent as a

> weapon to end the relationship with the children? Or could it be used

> by a judicial system to purposely end a relationship with a parent?

>

> 5. Is it possible that nadas/fadas don't " fall in love " with their

> children but see the children as something else, like an extension of

> themselves, who they don't really like? Being an extension could

> explain some boundary problems.

>

> This looks like a two-edged sword of information. It seems that it

> can be used as evidence to encourage policies that require both

> parents to be actively involved with children, and as a mechanism to

> get rid of one, or, in the case of State intervention, both parents.

>

> The assumption could be that losing children is the equivalent of

> losing a marriage partner, and though never lost to memory, the pain

> of the loss will diminish to reasonable levels in time(or the same

> permanent emotional disablility will occur that might happen say at

> the death of a beloved spouse) Maybe it would depend on the person?

>

> I don't really believe any of this, it's just conjectures that may

> have some truth, or, maybe none.

>

> I know a man whose somewhat BP mother divorced his father when he was

> about 2 and then married another person. They moved to where the

> original father would have trouble getting to the son and later

> arranged to " eliminate " the influence of the original father by

> trading no child support for no contact. The son is now an adult and

> very angry at both mother and step-dad for " cheating " him out of

> contact with his real father who by then had died. I'm not certain

> about the justification for these kind of things, but I do know that

> the Son's anger has transferred into his own family/children and the

> dysfunction continues.

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

>><<

>>Public release date: 13-Feb-2004

>>

>>Contact: Dominique Fourniol

>>d.fourniol@u...

>>44-

>>University College London

>>

>>UCL study establishes common biological ground for maternal and

>>romantic love in humans

>>

>>A new study of young mothers by researchers at University College

>>London (UCL) has shown that romantic and maternal love activate many

>>of the same specific regions of the brain, and lead to a suppression

>>of neural activity associated with critical social assessment of

>

> other

>

>>people and negative emotions. The findings suggest that once one is

>>closely familiar with a person, the need to assess the character and

>>personality of that person is reduced, and bring us closer to

>>explaining why, in neurological terms, 'love makes us blind.'

>>

>>In the experiment, published in February's NeuroImage online preview

>>edition, the brains of 20 young mothers were scanned while they

>

> viewed

>

>>pictures of their own children, children they were acquainted with,

>>and adult friends, to control for feelings of familiarity and

>>friendship (the brain regions involved in romantic love having been

>>identified by the authors in an earlier study).

>>

>>The similarity of the activity recorded in this study compared to

>>those obtained in the earlier study was striking; with activity in

>>several regions of the brain overlapping precisely in the two

>

> studies.

>

>>In summary, the findings showed that both types of love activate

>>specific regions in the reward system, while reducing activity in

>

> the

>

>>systems necessary for making negative judgements.

>>

>>The new results demonstrated also that the mechanisms of love are

>>similar in animals and humans, and that the brain regions activated

>>are the same ones as respond to the brain-produced drugs oxytocin

>

> and

>

>>vasopressin. These neurohormones have been shown in animals to be

>

> both

>

>>sufficient and necessary to induce both mother-infant bonding and

>>male-female bonding. The new research therefore provides a link to

>

> the

>

>>previous work on animals, showing that the same 'love-potion,'

>>produced by the brain, known to work in animals is also at work in

>

> humans.

>

>> " Both romantic and maternal love are highly rewarding experiences

>

> that

>

>>are linked to the perpetuation of the species, and consequently

>

> have a

>

>>closely linked biological function of crucial evolutionary

>>importance, " said s Bartels, of UCL's Wellcome Department of

>>Imaging Neuroscience. " Yet almost nothing is known about their

>

> neural

>

>>correlates in the human.

>>

>> " Our research enables us to conclude that human attachment employs a

>>push-pull mechanism that overcomes social distance by deactivating

>>networks used for critical social assessment and negative emotions,

>>while it bonds individuals through the involvement of the reward

>>circuitry (regions in the brain that induce euphoric feelings),

>>explaining the power of love to motivate and exhilerate. "

>>

[Guest guest]

Public release date: 13-Feb-2004

The title of the study reads: " UCL study establishes common

biological ground for maternal and romantic love in humans " .

And, the study was done on *normal* mothers, not nadas. So far

so good.

The researchers found that both " romantic and maternal love

activate many of the same specific regions of the brain and lead

to a *suppression* of neural activity associated with CRITICAL

SOCIAL ASSESSMENT [which most or all of our nada's are famous

for] and NEGATIVE EMOTIONS " [negative emotions, too, are a

hallmark of nadahood].

Edith here:

In other words, for *normals*, the findings suggest that once

one is familiar with a person, the need to find fault with them

is reduced. But we KOs who have had nadas know that our nada can

pick pick pick away at us KOs when we've been split all bad, and

thus the other saying applies -- ie, " Familiarity breeds

contempt. " Thus, this is one way my/our nadas differ from normal

mothers.

And, continuing with the article:

" ... the findings showed that both types of love *activate*

specific regions in the *reward* system [in the brain], while

*reducing activity* in the systems necessary for making NEGATIVE

JUDGEMENTS. "

Edith here:

As I remember, the reward regions are in the hypothalamus and

pre-optical areas of the brain. But, hmmm, this didn't happen in

my nada. My nada never showed either love for us or happiness.

The article continued:

" ... the brain regions activated ... [are] both sufficient and

necessary to induce both mother-infant bonding and male-female

bonding. "

Edith's comment: That neurotransmitter 'love-potion' stuff that

works in normal humans didn't do that in my nada. My nada either

lacked love-potion stuff OR she used it all up on HERSELF.

And the study concluded:

" ... human attachment employs a push-pull mechanism that ...

[deactivates] ... networks used for critical social assessment

and negative emotions, while it bonds individuals through the

involvement of the reward circuitry (regions in the brain that

induce euphoric feelings), explaining the power of love to

motivate and exhilerate. "

Edith here:

My sister and I (and our father) were " bonded " to nada via FOG

(ie, Fear, Obligation, and Guilt). My nada was full of herself,

she constantly made critical demands, and continuously exhibited

negative attitudes, moods and demeanor.

So, referring back to my Subject Line, part of the answer may be

that my nada lacked the capability to respond to 'love potion'

stuff produced in her brain, and I also agree with the new

research that's been indicating that nada's brains are probably

wired wrong in the hippocampus, amygdala, and limbic system.

Or, maybe there are two kinds of nadas -- those lacking love

potion and those whose brains are wired wrong. And, maybe a

combination of both of the above. <sigh>

- Edith

Wearin' my researcher hat

[Guest guest]

Yup! She lacked love-potion stuff all right, she poured the darned

stuff down the drain! Hehehehehehe

SmileS!

Carol M

Edith wrote:

> Edith's comment: That neurotransmitter 'love-potion' stuff that

> works in normal humans didn't do that in my nada. My nada either

> lacked love-potion stuff OR she used it all up on HERSELF.

[Guest guest]

>

>Or, maybe there are two kinds of nadas -- those lacking love

> potion and those whose brains are wired wrong. And, maybe a

> combination of both of the above. <sigh>

Sounds like good justification to raise money for brain transplant research

<];-)>

[Guest guest]

This is an interesting concept. I had a student do a speech on the

chemical basis of romantic love last year. She proposed that we

develop an antidote to that chemical to give people who have trouble

letting go. I thought we could make a fortune selling that in WTO.

My thoughts on the article is that it is hard to determine the

difference between the way you are wired by nature, the way you are

wired by conditioning, and how you are enculurated.

I know, in my field, we would explain the suppression of critical

social assessment with Perceptual Accentuation (where you notice what

you are looking for) - yet from that standpoint, it would be more of

a learned cultural behavior (of what you are " supposed " to look for

in your romantic partners and children) than a biological one.

It is very interesting to consider the biological basis for this

also - as problems that arise from distorting reality too much in

either direction - by either focusing too much on the negative - or

not being able to see any negative, even when it would be productive

to do so.

But then again - with the learned behavior - I am speaking more of

distorting reality by focusing on different aspects of reality and

ignoring other aspects...or filtering them to make them more

congruent with your initial perception.

With BPD - many of the perceptions have NO basis in reality. i.e.

they don't so much focus on the negative or positive that is there to

observe - they focus on their own illusions.

About the research. It would be interesting to see a study of BPs

done. What is the difference in their patterns when they split

someone good or split someone bad? Would they show the " love potion "

when they split someone as all good?

Could it be that they are actually " addicted " to that " love potion " ?

Which could explain their tendency to have the intense relationships -

yet once they see some " reality " in the person - they can no longer

get their " fix " from them - thus that person now holds no value in

their eyes - and they search for another person to give them

that " fix " ?

I don't know. In ways the research seems to have some possibility to

explain the splitting behavior. That anyone who cannot give them a

steady fix of " love potion " is " bad " - and anyone who can give them a

steady fix is " good " (as long as that lasts).

Free

> Public release date: 13-Feb-2004

>

> The title of the study reads: " UCL study establishes common

> biological ground for maternal and romantic love in humans " .

> And, the study was done on *normal* mothers, not nadas. So far

> so good.

>

> The researchers found that both " romantic and maternal love

> activate many of the same specific regions of the brain and lead

> to a *suppression* of neural activity associated with CRITICAL

> SOCIAL ASSESSMENT [which most or all of our nada's are famous

> for] and NEGATIVE EMOTIONS " [negative emotions, too, are a

> hallmark of nadahood].

>

> Edith here:

>

> In other words, for *normals*, the findings suggest that once

> one is familiar with a person, the need to find fault with them

> is reduced. But we KOs who have had nadas know that our nada can

> pick pick pick away at us KOs when we've been split all bad, and

> thus the other saying applies -- ie, " Familiarity breeds

> contempt. " Thus, this is one way my/our nadas differ from normal

> mothers.

>

> And, continuing with the article:

>

> " ... the findings showed that both types of love *activate*

> specific regions in the *reward* system [in the brain], while

> *reducing activity* in the systems necessary for making NEGATIVE

> JUDGEMENTS. "

>

> Edith here:

>

> As I remember, the reward regions are in the hypothalamus and

> pre-optical areas of the brain. But, hmmm, this didn't happen in

> my nada. My nada never showed either love for us or happiness.

>

> The article continued:

>

> " ... the brain regions activated ... [are] both sufficient and

> necessary to induce both mother-infant bonding and male-female

> bonding. "

>

> Edith's comment: That neurotransmitter 'love-potion' stuff that

> works in normal humans didn't do that in my nada. My nada either

> lacked love-potion stuff OR she used it all up on HERSELF.

>

> And the study concluded:

>

> " ... human attachment employs a push-pull mechanism that ...

> [deactivates] ... networks used for critical social assessment

> and negative emotions, while it bonds individuals through the

> involvement of the reward circuitry (regions in the brain that

> induce euphoric feelings), explaining the power of love to

> motivate and exhilerate. "

>

> Edith here:

>

> My sister and I (and our father) were " bonded " to nada via FOG

> (ie, Fear, Obligation, and Guilt). My nada was full of herself,

> she constantly made critical demands, and continuously exhibited

> negative attitudes, moods and demeanor.

>

> So, referring back to my Subject Line, part of the answer may be

> that my nada lacked the capability to respond to 'love potion'

> stuff produced in her brain, and I also agree with the new

> research that's been indicating that nada's brains are probably

> wired wrong in the hippocampus, amygdala, and limbic system.

>

> Or, maybe there are two kinds of nadas -- those lacking love

> potion and those whose brains are wired wrong. And, maybe a

> combination of both of the above. <sigh>

>

> - Edith

> Wearin' my researcher hat