Guest guest Posted March 20, 2004 Report Share Posted March 20, 2004 Barb, thanks for your input. My wife is saying she doesn't want to continue with a therapist, but maybe she would see her therapist with me. I had very bad experiences with joint therapy with my ex-wife. She came but refused to talk. The therapist concentrated on what I could do to improve the marriage. Nothing I could do helped and it left my wife in the driver's seat to destroy the marriage. I felt like a complete failure. He never discussed my wife's responsibility, because she wouldn't talk. He never talked about how abnormal her behavior was. He never told me I had a right to be treated better. He never told me that maybe I should just give up and get out. I didn't know enough to know these things by myself. The therapist said that it takes two people to destroy a marriage. He lied. It takes two people to make a marriage work, but it takes only one to destroy it. I am still angry at that therapist, and his predecessor, because they both did me a great deal of harm. I think I have made enough progress not to fall in that trap again. - Dan Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 21, 2004 Report Share Posted March 21, 2004 Dan, I totally agree with you on your take on responsibility in a marriage. Sylvia <<<<<<<<< ...................> > The therapist said that it takes two people to destroy a marriage. > He lied. It takes two people to make a marriage work, but it takes > only one to destroy it. ........> - Dan>>>>>>> Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 21, 2004 Report Share Posted March 21, 2004 Amen! Relationships too! Free > ..................> > > The therapist said that it takes two people to destroy a marriage. > > He lied. It takes two people to make a marriage work, but it takes > > only one to destroy it. ........> - Dan>>>>>>> Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 21, 2004 Report Share Posted March 21, 2004 Yep - on relationships too! Sylvia > > ..................> > > > The therapist said that it takes two people to destroy a > marriage. > > > He lied. It takes two people to make a marriage work, but it > takes > > > only one to destroy it. ........> - Dan>>>>>>> Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 21, 2004 Report Share Posted March 21, 2004 Actually - if only one works on it - I wouldn't so much say that the other person destroys it - but they certainly seem to allow it to die. Especially if the relationship is " ill. " Kind of like CPR - I guess. If one person is pumping away - while the other one just watches (and sometimes offers " constructive " criticism as to the other person is doing) - the first person can quickly frazzle out. Two working together as a team could make the chances of resuscitation much better. Free > > > ..................> > > > > The therapist said that it takes two people to destroy a > > marriage. > > > > He lied. It takes two people to make a marriage work, but it > > takes > > > > only one to destroy it. ........> - Dan>>>>>>> Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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