Guest guest Posted February 11, 2004 Report Share Posted February 11, 2004 Dan, I hope the Risperdal works for you. You could be right about the ADHD. The Straterra has helped me to sort out what's ADHD, PTSD, and what's just plain human, but that's about it. Still, I like taking it because at least now when someone tells me something, I remember it. If someone tells me they already told me once, I know if they're right or not. There was a time when I couldn't do that. Also, I can focus better. I posted a few weeks ago about song lyrics. It's like hearing songs that are 30 years old all over again because now I can understand what they are singing about. As far as the amputee wish goes, only you can decide that. If your therapist thinks you're nuts, that's his problem. I'm assuming you're referring to your Jungian therapist. And, you're right, only you know what it's like to be you. Take care of yourself first, even if it means having your leg off. Tammy > > When and why did you stop Ritalin? > > Are you trying something else now? > > Tammy, I stopped Ritalin 2 weeks ago because it made my wish to be > an amputee even more excruciating than before. Other than that, it > helped my assertiveness and my ability to concentrate. > > I spent a week off meds to see where I am, and then started a very > low dose of Risperdal, a neuroleptic (anti-psychotic). A > psychiatrist in Lyon told my therapist that he had good results with > that treatment for ADHD in adolescents. Both of them think that it > is less likely than Ritalin to increase the wish to be an amputee. > > So far, I feel a little calmer. I can envision compromising with > myself and being content with a below-knee amputation, as long as I > don't have to wait too long for it. When I try to imagine never > being an amputee my thoughts still turn suicidal. We will see what > we will see. > > I don't think I actually have ADHD at all. I think that the > symptoms are a side effect of needing my leg off, and once it is > off, I won't need meds any more. My therapist thinks I am nuts, but > he doesn't know what it is like to be me. When I run out of other > things to try I will test my hypothesis. > > - Dan Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 13, 2004 Report Share Posted February 13, 2004 << And, you're right, only you know what it's like to be you. Take care of yourself first... >> Thanks, Tammy, it makes me feel loved. If my wife and my therapist thought it was OK for me to put myself first and not concentrate on details such as a leg, I would certainly be happier and I would probably be much less stuck, whether or not I ended up as an amputee. - Dan Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 16, 2004 Report Share Posted February 16, 2004 Dan, I know I'm overstepping my bounds here, but.......maybe it's your wife and therapist that are holding you back from healing yourself? Do you think you could do better without them? Who's opinion REALLY matters? Yours or theirs? I know it's easy for me to sit here and say what is obviously difficult if not impossible to do. I can't really relate to your situation because I have a normal loving spouse and an excellent therapist who are very supportive. Still, I think we KOs have to think in terms of removing 'toxic' people from our lives. Otherwise, we are just continuing the abuse pattern we were caught up in as children. We learned as children that we don't deserve any better, but we do, and only WE can change it. Tammy > << And, you're right, only you know what it's like to be you. Take > care of yourself first... >> > > Thanks, Tammy, it makes me feel loved. If my wife and my therapist > thought it was OK for me to put myself first and not concentrate on > details such as a leg, I would certainly be happier and I would > probably be much less stuck, whether or not I ended up as an amputee. > > - Dan Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 16, 2004 Report Share Posted February 16, 2004 Tammy, I have been considering very seriously just what your are saying. My therapist is the best I have ever worked with. He is the only supportive person in my life (other than people on this group and the group I moderate, and my cat). But, he doesn't have a clue what it is like to be me. My wife does care about me in her own way. I have been urging her for a long time to see a therapist, and she finally started. So far she just seems to want to find out if I should be committed or if she should leave me. I think her reaction looks like that of a BPD. She will be going to the USA for most of a year starting in August. I am looking forward to being alone for a while. - Dan Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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