Guest guest Posted October 29, 2009 Report Share Posted October 29, 2009 I was a jock growing up and I lived on a farm, changing irrigation pipe and riding horses. I was a great softball player because that was all that was available in the 50's. I mostly played baseball because my dad was a semi-pro player who didn't want us to run or throw like a girl and I didn't. My coach told me that "I ran too long in one place" and I assume that meant that although I was quick I was not fast. I was very short topping 4' 11" until I had knee replacements a couple years ago. I majored in physical education in college before switching to early childhood education as an adult. My mother was super morbidly obese. The Norwegian side of my family all were thin until the moment that they conceived and then we girls all ballooned up. I never had craves and I never overate and so when I continued to put on weight I was shocked. I researched the DS thanks to my friend and former co-worker, Ellen Rowley, the founder of this group. When I had my physical with Dr, Keshishian he explained to my husband and me that I had the "survivor" gene and that the responsibility for my weight was 15% and the rest was heredity. Could I exercise more? Of course. Am I happy with the 140-150 pound loss? Of course. I never had any emotional issues or hang ups - just ask my MSW husband who spent 20 years counseling people with all kinds of problems. Am I compliant with the requirements of the DS - no sodas, no carbonation, no alcohol, protein first, then veggies, etc., and taking all my supplements as required - you bet! There are many reasons why people gain weight. We all have different stories and reasons. What is your story? Marla WA State DS: 2-9-05 Total bilateral knee replacements: 10-06 TT and brachioplasty: 10-07 thigh lifts: 1-09 Color me Happy! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 30, 2009 Report Share Posted October 30, 2009 Jo & all, I absolutely did eat emotionally as a kid. In elementary school I was maybe 10 pounds overweight due to sugar and carb eating out of boredom of being a latchkey kid and unhappiness of having to live with a stepfamily who hated me. Mom took my older sis, and i lived with dad, new wife & her 3 older kids who were mean & hateful. By Jr High my older step bro started molesting me, and I began a campaign to intentionally become ugly and physically disgusting to him by getting fat. I realized in my early 20s what I had done but by then I felt I had no ability to handle unwanted male attention, and I continued to gain 10 lbs a year until I had DS. Before I had my surgery, I found an excellent counselor who helped me believe I could handle unwanted male attention by Verbalizing My Boundaries. I still struggle with being silent and not reacting when im uncomfortable or in danger. But let me say that when I do stand up for myself, it feels incredible! It's like a high. Even something as simple as asking the drunk guy sitting next to me at the rock concert to please maintain his own space & don't press his thigh against mine. I experienced a wonderful elation that lasted for days! I stuck up for myself instead of running away or feeling victimized. This was my experience. I hope sharing it helps someone else. Vicki in Roseville > > Great question Jo! I had a troubled childhood ...before that I was a normal skinny, active kid. I started gaining weight around 8 yrs old. Even though I've come to terms with why I gained weight I have to acknowledge that what may have started as a means of comfort, it became a really bad habit!! It's the habits that are hard to overcome, even when the memories surface, I have to remind myself that was a long time ago, to love myself NOW! > > > > > ________________________________ > > To: DS_Friends_Keshishian > Sent: Thu, October 29, 2009 1:41:30 AM > Subject: Why did you get fat? > > > I watch The Biggest Loser. I cry at some point during each show. Sometimes I cry out of joy, sometimes I greive with the contestants. This weeks show seem to have an extra emotional punch. Jillian (one of the trainers) always pushes to get the contestant to " deal " with what ever emotional problem has brought them to become obese. So they can deal with it and quit the behavior that has led to them becoming obese. > > I don't personally feel I have some BIG emotional issue. I think obesity runs in my family so we are pre=disposed. Add that, to just a " family " way (bad habits) of eating and over-eating. I was a thin child. So was my brother and sister. We became obese when we grew up. The same for my parents...aunts, uncles...Even my own children...thin as kids, obese/overweight as adults. So I don't think in " MY " case it's EMOTIONAL... but rather bad eating habits combined with genetics. > > How about YOU? Has your obesity been a cloak that protects you? Is there an underlying reason why you have become obese? Do you love yourself enough to " allow " yourself to reach a more normal weight? > > Hugs > > Jo > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 30, 2009 Report Share Posted October 30, 2009 Thank you for sharing Vicki, I know that it took a lot of courage. Congratulations on the progress you've made, speaking up for yourself and losing weight. To: DS_Friends_Keshishian Sent: Fri, October 30, 2009 10:03:50 AMSubject: Re: Why did you get fat? Jo & all,I absolutely did eat emotionally as a kid. In elementary school I was maybe 10 pounds overweight due to sugar and carb eating out of boredom of being a latchkey kid and unhappiness of having to live with a stepfamily who hated me. Mom took my older sis, and i lived with dad, new wife & her 3 older kids who were mean & hateful. By Jr High my older step bro started molesting me, and I began a campaign to intentionally become ugly and physically disgusting to him by getting fat. I realized in my early 20s what I had done but by then I felt I had no ability to handle unwanted male attention, and I continued to gain 10 lbs a year until I had DS. Before I had my surgery, I found an excellent counselor who helped me believe I could handle unwanted male attention by Verbalizing My Boundaries. I still struggle with being silent and not reacting when im uncomfortable or in danger. But let me say that when I do stand up for myself, it feels incredible! It's like a high. Even something as simple as asking the drunk guy sitting next to me at the rock concert to please maintain his own space & don't press his thigh against mine. I experienced a wonderful elation that lasted for days! I stuck up for myself instead of running away or feeling victimized. This was my experience. I hope sharing it helps someone else. Vicki in Roseville>> Great question Jo! I had a troubled childhood ... before that I was a normal skinny, active kid. I started gaining weight around 8 yrs old. Even though I've come to terms with why I gained weight I have to acknowledge that what may have started as a means of comfort, it became a really bad habit!! It's the habits that are hard to overcome, even when the memories surface, I have to remind myself that was a long time ago, to love myself NOW! > > > > > ____________ _________ _________ __> From: Jo <moobabies@. ..>> To: DS_Friends_Keshishi anyahoogroups (DOT) com> Sent: Thu, October 29, 2009 1:41:30 AM> Subject: [DS_Friends_ Keshishian] Why did you get fat?> > > I watch The Biggest Loser. I cry at some point during each show. Sometimes I cry out of joy, sometimes I greive with the contestants. This weeks show seem to have an extra emotional punch. Jillian (one of the trainers) always pushes to get the contestant to "deal" with what ever emotional problem has brought them to become obese. So they can deal with it and quit the behavior that has led to them becoming obese.> > I don't personally feel I have some BIG emotional issue. I think obesity runs in my family so we are pre=disposed. Add that, to just a "family" way (bad habits) of eating and over-eating. I was a thin child. So was my brother and sister. We became obese when we grew up. The same for my parents...aunts, uncles...Even my own children...thin as kids, obese/overweight as adults. So I don't think in "MY" case it's EMOTIONAL... but rather bad eating habits combined with genetics.> > How about YOU? Has your obesity been a cloak that protects you? Is there an underlying reason why you have become obese? Do you love yourself enough to "allow" yourself to reach a more normal weight?> > Hugs> > Jo> Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 30, 2009 Report Share Posted October 30, 2009 They say " It's not where you start its where you finish, and girl look at you now! " It sounds like you finished well.. That's an inspiring story. Vicki > > > > Great question Jo! I had a troubled childhood ...before that I was a normal skinny, active kid. I started gaining weight around 8 yrs old. Even though I've come to terms with why I gained weight I have to acknowledge that what may have started as a means of comfort, it became a really bad habit!! It's the habits that are hard to overcome, even when the memories surface, I have to remind myself that was a long time ago, to love myself NOW! > > > > > > > > > > ________________________________ > > From: Jo <moobabies@> > > To: DS_Friends_Keshishian > > Sent: Thu, October 29, 2009 1:41:30 AM > > Subject: Why did you get fat? > > > > > > I watch The Biggest Loser. I cry at some point during each show. Sometimes I cry out of joy, sometimes I greive with the contestants. This weeks show seem to have an extra emotional punch. Jillian (one of the trainers) always pushes to get the contestant to " deal " with what ever emotional problem has brought them to become obese. So they can deal with it and quit the behavior that has led to them becoming obese. > > > > I don't personally feel I have some BIG emotional issue. I think obesity runs in my family so we are pre=disposed. Add that, to just a " family " way (bad habits) of eating and over-eating. I was a thin child. So was my brother and sister. We became obese when we grew up. The same for my parents...aunts, uncles...Even my own children...thin as kids, obese/overweight as adults. So I don't think in " MY " case it's EMOTIONAL... but rather bad eating habits combined with genetics. > > > > How about YOU? Has your obesity been a cloak that protects you? Is there an underlying reason why you have become obese? Do you love yourself enough to " allow " yourself to reach a more normal weight? > > > > Hugs > > > > Jo > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 30, 2009 Report Share Posted October 30, 2009 I was a binge eater. I ate whatever I wanted, what I wanted. I started at age 6 and went on from there. As a matter of fact, I never knew what a craving was till after my DS. Before, I just ate so I never let myself have one. One thing I miss about being big is anonymity. I was kind of a block of a person who just moved along. People didn't ask me for directions, didn't really look at me. I just was. It's different when you're so much smaller. People come into your personal space. They come closer. I've gotten more used to it, but sometimes I still miss just going my own way. A. ---------------- Duodenal Switch/Lap -- Drs. Alfons Pomp & Michel Gagner -- New York City 4/4/05: 265 lbs/BMI: 45.6 4/11/05: 256 lbs/BMI: 43.9 (date of surgery) 7/27/08: Gallbladder Removed 10/8/09: 119.2 lbs./BMI: 20.5 My pics: http://www.picturetrail.com/sfx/album/view/20083300 ---------------- From: Jo <moobabieshotmail (DOT) com>To: DS_Friends_Keshishi anyahoogroups (DOT) comSent: Thu, October 29, 2009 1:41:30 AMSubject: [DS_Friends_ Keshishian] Why did you get fat? I watch The Biggest Loser. I cry at some point during each show. Sometimes I cry out of joy, sometimes I greive with the contestants. This weeks show seem to have an extra emotional punch. Jillian (one of the trainers) always pushes to get the contestant to "deal" with what ever emotional problem has brought them to become obese. So they can deal with it and quit the behavior that has led to them becoming obese.I don't personally feel I have some BIG emotional issue. I think obesity runs in my family so we are pre=disposed. Add that, to just a "family" way (bad habits) of eating and over-eating. I was a thin child. So was my brother and sister. We became obese when we grew up. The same for my parents...aunts, uncles...Even my own children...thin as kids, obese/overweight as adults. So I don't think in "MY" case it's EMOTIONAL... but Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 31, 2009 Report Share Posted October 31, 2009 This has proven to be a very interesting subject. We are learning more about each other and taking a moment to reflect on ourselves. We are looking inward and " owning " our path to obesity. This is good. Whatever was our individual path was, that led to our obesity, the greatest thing we have in common is " We did something about it " . YEA US! Thanks sooooo much for sharing. I hope to hear for more. Hugs Jo Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 31, 2009 Report Share Posted October 31, 2009 There are probably many reasons, but the emotional ones seem to center around a childhood spent as a lonely " unparented " kid raised by two alcoholics, who barely noticed I was there. Not permitted to eat until the parents returned each night from their daily excursions to the bars, I have very early memories of sitting on my little chair in the kitchen, staring hungrily into the glass window on the oven where dinner was being kept on " warm, " and wishing so hard that they would come home so I could eat. When they eventually would, I would be so hungry I would gobble everything I could get my hands on or my fork into! So, I believe, began a lifetime of eating too much, too quickly, and of the expectancy that food would finally fulfill my longings. I'd like to think that by age 66 I'd have left that all far behind, but I know I haven't altogether. I still struggle with those desires to pig out on comfort food or sweets; I doubt they'll ever be altogether gone. Thanks for asking the question, Jo. The answers can provide some valuable and thoughtful insight into the complex emotional relationships we all have with food. Bellingham, WA DS 01-15-08 > > How about YOU? Has your obesity been a cloak that protects you? Is there an underlying reason why you have become obese? Do you love yourself enough to " allow " yourself to reach a more normal weight? > > Hugs > > Jo > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 31, 2009 Report Share Posted October 31, 2009 Your story brought tears to my eyes. It is amazing the impact that childhood has on us. vicki > > > > How about YOU? Has your obesity been a cloak that protects you? Is there an underlying reason why you have become obese? Do you love yourself enough to " allow " yourself to reach a more normal weight? > > > > Hugs > > > > Jo > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 2, 2009 Report Share Posted November 2, 2009 : Thanks for sharing. I think you bring up an excellent point. I don't really think any of us ever completely leave our trauma/drama behind. I think we can distance ourselves a tad but in a heartbeat it can be standing right beside us again at any second. What's more important, I think, is that we recognize it and the impact it has had on our lives, therefore we can hope to deal with it. Hugs Jo ++++++++++++++ I'd like to think that by age 66 I'd have left that all far behind, but I know I haven't altogether. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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