New Here

[Guest guest]

Welcome, Kellie. So glad you are here.

I've seen people in here mention both of the things your daughter

deals with. Maybe some will see this and can share something that

helped with their kids.

It's really a shame that she is so resistant to therapy. Our 16 year

old son has been seeing a specialist who is using ERP (exposure and

response/ritual prevention) and CBT (cognitive behavioral therapy)for

almost a year now, and between that and the meds (Celexa), he is doing

quite a bit better.

Does the behavioral therapist she sees, specialize in the treatment of

OCD? We went to many therapists, who didn't know what they were doing

in treating OCD, that didn't help at all. It really made a difference

for us. Does she say why she doesn't want to do the therapy? Doing

the exposure therapy can make anxiety go up, at first.

My husband is not much help or support either. He also has OCD, and I

think quite often he doesn't want to see it because it means he will

have to face it in himself. He has come around quite a bit though, in

the sense that he no longer blames our son. And also doesn't lose his

temper with him as much.

I'm so glad you found us. This is a really great group of people, who

will be able to relate to what you are going through. It's a great

source of support and information.

Again, welcome.

BJ

>

> Hello, my name is Kellie and I have a 15 year old daughter and a 10

> year old daughter who is in the process of being diagnosed with OCD.

> Unlike other people/children with OCD her obsessions and compulsions

> are different. She has issues with her clothing. She will not

> change her clothes. She wears the same outfit everyday. She also

> will not wear her hair down. It has to be in a tight bun on her

> head. We have been dealing with is since about last April. It has

> gradually gotten worse. I was working about 35 hours a week, but it

> started to affect my performance at work and I was let go from my

> job. I'm currently home with her dealing with this, but eventually I

> have to go back to work, though I cannot imagine trying to deal with

> getting myself off to work and her ready in the morning. At first

> they thought she had SID, but now there thinking its OCD. She has

> been seeing a behavioral therapist now for about 2 months and she is

> very resistent to this. She does not want to try and getting her to

> even practice at home is a chore. She has an appointment next

> Saturday with a Psychologist to see about putting her on meds. Has

> anyone found this is helpful? Sorry this is so long, but I really

> could use some support as my Husband is not the greatest at dealing

> with all this.

>

> Thanks,

>

> Kellie

>

[Guest guest]

Hi Kellie,

I'm also new to this sight. I can totally relate to what your experiencing.

I have a son, Chase, who is 8. We have been dealing with the clothing thing

since he was about 3. It has reached its peak these last few months though.

Chase has to have the right " socks " , " shoes, jeans, shirt etc and hair has to be

just so.I find myself washing the same pair of socks, jeans etc, every night

because that is all he will wear. It is draining to say the least and I tend

to dread mornings, especially on school days. He has always been extra

sensitive, labels bug him, seams bug him etc. We sought help for him about a

year ago. He sees a psychologist weekly and was put on a med last week by his

psychiatrist. He has a lot of aggression too, so she chose to put him on

seroquel 12.5mg every night. Chase is also a poor sleeper, suffers from social

anxiety and depression as well. So, seroquel is supposed to help with all of

those things. So far, I have seen a slight

improvement. Is your daughter also sensitive to things touvching her skin,

labels, hair on her neck etc. OCD is exhausting for all of us. I have 2 girls

ages 5 & 10 who are just as drained. How does your other daughter deal with

all of this? It sounds like you are the main person who has to deal with this

since your husband has a hard time. I guess I would not hesitate to try a med

if that seems right for her. Meds aren't easy, especially when dealing with

kids, you worry about all the side effects etc. At least that's how I was.

But, it had gotten to the point where I felt like I had to do something or I

was failing Chase. So far, so good.

Hugs,

kelliejohnson36 wrote:

Hello, my name is Kellie and I have a 15 year old daughter and a 10

year old daughter who is in the process of being diagnosed with OCD.

Unlike other people/children with OCD her obsessions and compulsions

are different. She has issues with her clothing. She will not

change her clothes. She wears the same outfit everyday. She also

will not wear her hair down. It has to be in a tight bun on her

head. We have been dealing with is since about last April. It has

gradually gotten worse. I was working about 35 hours a week, but it

started to affect my performance at work and I was let go from my

job. I'm currently home with her dealing with this, but eventually I

have to go back to work, though I cannot imagine trying to deal with

getting myself off to work and her ready in the morning. At first

they thought she had SID, but now there thinking its OCD. She has

been seeing a behavioral therapist now for about 2 months and she is

very resistent to this. She does not want to try and getting her to

even practice at home is a chore. She has an appointment next

Saturday with a Psychologist to see about putting her on meds. Has

anyone found this is helpful? Sorry this is so long, but I really

could use some support as my Husband is not the greatest at dealing

with all this.

Thanks,

Kellie

---------------------------------

Be a better friend, newshound, and know-it-all with Yahoo! Mobile. Try it now.

[Guest guest]

HI ,

Welcome to the group!

This only my personal opinion and experience on meds in children this young.

My son is 6 and started meds at age 4. He started with prozac. He had extremely

horrififc bad thoughts, so I had no choice but to medicate him. The prozac

worked but made him manic, so we tried zoloft. The same thing happened. We than

tried Abilify, which worked well for almost a whole year, than it stopped

working. We than tried Trileptal, which was great, but he had an allergic

reaction. I think your getting my point here. The problem with such young

children is that they are so little, many get allergic reactions or paradoxical

reactions to the meds. My son is now on an anti-psychotic-Seroquel along with a

miniscule dose of Celexa.He is doing okay with the thoughts and rituals, etc,

but is still very manic.

I'm not trying to scare you, but in my opinion, I would use the meds as a last

resort in a child this young or if you have any history of bipolar in your

family at all, I would be very very careful!

Hopefully, your child will be one that does respond well to the meds. Some do!!!

Just be aware!

I also have an 11 yr old dd who had the same problem with meds except she never

became manic on the Zoloft. She started meds at age 5.

This is an awesome group with lots of sharing and information. I think you will

enjoy it!

I wish you luck and hugs

Judy

[Guest guest]

Just wondering about the tics..... my son developed them after we got

the ADHD/OCD diagnosis......found out that it was one of the ADHD

meds that gave him the tics and the OCD made the tics worse. We are

currently using (gen.) Ritalin, Prozac, Clonidine together and will

change from Clonidine to Guanfacine (Tenex), and from Prozac to

Celexa as soon as it's time to refill.

This age group is hard with all the growth spurts they go through -

lots of adjusting the doses.

Our Psychiatrist suggested my son (now 9) read a book called " Mr.

Worry " about the OCD ~ seems to be a real nice book for this age

group.

>

> Hi! My name is Cathie. My son, , has Tourette Syndrome, OCD,

and ADHD.

> is 7 years old and in 1st grade. The OCD and ADHD cause him

more

> problems than the Tourettes, at least right now. He used to tic so

much that

> it really interfered in his life but that's not a big problem now.

> takes Risperdal, Clonidine, and Adderall. Since adding the

Risperdal about a

> month ago, we have seen a huge change in his ability to focus,

shorter

> rages, and weaker obsessions. Other meds has tried are

Prozac, Paxil,

> Ritalin, and Zyrtec. I'm also on a Tourette's list but wanted to

see if I

> could zone in a little more on the OCD stuff right now.

> Cathie

>

[Guest guest]

Hi!

My daughter has ADHD, OCD, and some tics. We started her on Concerta

(methylphenidate, like Ritalin,), but had to stop after a week,

because it increased her anxiety and obsessive behavior. She has now

switched to Strattera, which is an ADHD med for those who have

comorbid anxiety disorders. It takes longer to see effects, but it

seems to be slowly improving her ADHD without increasing the other

behaviors.

We have read Mr. Worry and enjoyed it. The same author, Holly, L.

Niner, also wrote one about Tourette Syndrome, which is also nice.

It is called " I can't stop: a story about Tourette Syndrome. Another

well known book about OCD is " Up and down the worry hill " , by Aurene

Wagner.

Dianne

> >

> > Hi! My name is Cathie. My son, , has Tourette Syndrome, OCD,

> and ADHD.

> > is 7 years old and in 1st grade. The OCD and ADHD cause him

> more

> > problems than the Tourettes, at least right now. He used to tic so

> much that

> > it really interfered in his life but that's not a big problem now.

>

> > takes Risperdal, Clonidine, and Adderall. Since adding the

> Risperdal about a

> > month ago, we have seen a huge change in his ability to focus,

> shorter

> > rages, and weaker obsessions. Other meds has tried are

> Prozac, Paxil,

> > Ritalin, and Zyrtec. I'm also on a Tourette's list but wanted to

> see if I

> > could zone in a little more on the OCD stuff right now.

> > Cathie

> >

>

[Guest guest]

Hello,

I am a 41 year old mom and my husband is 46. Our daughter

Ella was dx’ed with Asperger’s. Our 22 month old son is a typical child. I

sensed something was wrong when Ella was about seven months old, a mother’s intuition.

I called the pediatrician and he said wait until her next appointment. Well

finally by the time she was two and a half we got early intervention involved.

They sent out a whole bunch of people and gave her therapy. It helped us a lot!

Well Early intervention ends when kids turn three. All the early intervention people

they sent out said she showed a lot of signs of autism. In the meantime our pediatrician

referred us to Children’s hospital to see a specialist. After almost a year of

appointments the doctor’s officially dx’ed her with Asperger’s in February this

year. Our son is a lot different than our daughter, but he has some “quirkyâ€

things about him too. I am hoping it is just him copying his sister……

Now Ella will be turning four and we are still seeing the

doctor at Children’s hospital. She is great BUT we need more than one session a

month. I wish we qualified for weekly occupational therapy, our insurance

blows. It’s frustrating because I keep hearing if you only had Medicaid….. Well

we don’t have Medicaid and when I spoke to my insurance company they gave me

instructions on how to TRY to see IF we qualify for therapy. They actually send

the doctors referral off to an outside company and then they decide if it is

deemed necessary. They said it will probably be not necessary. Grrr! I don’t

understand why if you have insurance you get less than if you’re on Medicaid. We went to the school they did an IEP and said

they can give her help under the Developmentally Delayed label but not under

her DX because she is high functioning. (That whole thing is confusing to me)

Anyways, I have several concerns about sending her to school. We have another

meeting and she could start school as soon as the second week in January.

Other topics I want to get advice on are family, behavioral

issues and schooling. We have several family members who just don’t get it. It

ends up pissing us off. We get tired of their unsolicited suggestions and

opinions, even when we tell them to stop. It’s to the point where we like to

avoid them at times. Are we alone or do others have this problem too. We get criticized

for not spanking Ella to correct her behavior. We learned spanking only exacerbates

the situation. So we don’t. The tantrums are one of the hardest things I have

ever had to deal with, more difficult than boot camp. As far as schooling I am considering

home schooling any suggestions?

We are looking to chat with other parents who understand. We

often wonder the “whys†of things. For example last year I had a sitter I was

working in home so I was still around…. Anyways, this sitter had a teenage

daughter and there were some issues and I had to let her go. She had argued

with her daughter in front of my kids. Well the line “I’m not arguing with youâ€

(between the mom and daughter) was said and for the past year Ella says that line

EVERY day many times a day. We have tried to change the subject yet Ella keeps

repeating that phrase (and a lot of others phrases) she also reenacts the Toy

Story movie line for line. How do we try to change this behavior?

Thanks for any advice.

If guns kill people then pencils cause misspelled words

[Guest guest]

Hello,

I have a daughter, Ella, too. She is nine with AS.

You are not alone. Family can have a difficult time understanding this, friends too. Your daughter is at a stage when she " should " be growing out of some of the toddler behaviors, but mine haven't yet. I think a lot of people know something about Autism, but Asperger's is still misunderstood by a lot of people. Keep working on getting your daughter what she needs. It's very frustrating and now that my girls are both over 7 our insurance coverage really goes down for therapies. I wish this were easier for all of us, but often times it is not. My life is a lot of two steps forward, one step back. You are your childs best advocate and don't doubt your ability to do what is best for her!!

 

Hello,

I am a 41 year old mom and my husband is 46. Our daughter Ella was dx’ed with Asperger’s. Our 22 month old son is a typical child. I sensed something was wrong when Ella was about seven months old, a mother’s intuition. I called the pediatrician and he said wait until her next appointment. Well finally by the time she was two and a half we got early intervention involved. They sent out a whole bunch of people and gave her therapy. It helped us a lot! Well Early intervention ends when kids turn three. All the early intervention people they sent out said she showed a lot of signs of autism. In the meantime our pediatrician referred us to Children’s hospital to see a specialist. After almost a year of appointments the doctor’s officially dx’ed her with Asperger’s in February this year. Our son is a lot different than our daughter, but he has some “quirky” things about him too. I am hoping it is just him copying his sister……

Now Ella will be turning four and we are still seeing the doctor at Children’s hospital. She is great BUT we need more than one session a month. I wish we qualified for weekly occupational therapy, our insurance blows. It’s frustrating because I keep hearing if you only had Medicaid….. Well we don’t have Medicaid and when I spoke to my insurance company they gave me instructions on how to TRY to see IF we qualify for therapy. They actually send the doctors referral off to an outside company and then they decide if it is deemed necessary. They said it will probably be not necessary. Grrr! I don’t understand why if you have insurance you get less than if you’re on Medicaid.  We went to the school they did an IEP and said they can give her help under the Developmentally Delayed label but not under her DX because she is high functioning. (That whole thing is confusing to me) Anyways, I have several concerns about sending her to school. We have another meeting and she could start school as soon as the second week in January.

Other topics I want to get advice on are family, behavioral issues and schooling. We have several family members who just don’t get it. It ends up pissing us off. We get tired of their unsolicited suggestions and opinions, even when we tell them to stop. It’s to the point where we like to avoid them at times. Are we alone or do others have this problem too. We get criticized for not spanking Ella to correct her behavior. We learned spanking only exacerbates the situation. So we don’t. The tantrums are one of the hardest things I have ever had to deal with, more difficult than boot camp. As far as schooling I am considering home schooling any suggestions?

We are looking to chat with other parents who understand. We often wonder the “whys” of things. For example last year I had a sitter I was working in home so I was still around…. Anyways, this sitter had a teenage daughter and there were some issues and I had to let her go. She had argued with her daughter in front of my kids. Well the line “I’m not arguing with you” (between the mom and daughter) was said and for the past year Ella says that line EVERY day many times a day. We have tried to change the subject yet Ella keeps repeating that phrase (and a lot of others phrases) she also reenacts the Toy Story movie line for line. How do we try to change this behavior?

Thanks for any advice.

 

 

If guns kill people then pencils cause misspelled words

[Guest guest]

Also, we do k12 through the public school WAVA. It's an online, free, public education but it's done at home. If you are not familiar look it up. Everybody with ASD kids do something a little different and family needs are different for everyone. We are only 8 weeks into this school and it's not my first choice to be my childs teacher and mother, but I am very excited about what they are learning and I also like being in control of what they are exposed to. Just another option!

Hello,

I have a daughter, Ella, too. She is nine with AS.

You are not alone. Family can have a difficult time understanding this, friends too. Your daughter is at a stage when she " should " be growing out of some of the toddler behaviors, but mine haven't yet. I think a lot of people know something about Autism, but Asperger's is still misunderstood by a lot of people. Keep working on getting your daughter what she needs. It's very frustrating and now that my girls are both over 7 our insurance coverage really goes down for therapies. I wish this were easier for all of us, but often times it is not. My life is a lot of two steps forward, one step back. You are your childs best advocate and don't doubt your ability to do what is best for her!!

 

Hello,

I am a 41 year old mom and my husband is 46. Our daughter Ella was dx’ed with Asperger’s. Our 22 month old son is a typical child. I sensed something was wrong when Ella was about seven months old, a mother’s intuition. I called the pediatrician and he said wait until her next appointment. Well finally by the time she was two and a half we got early intervention involved. They sent out a whole bunch of people and gave her therapy. It helped us a lot! Well Early intervention ends when kids turn three. All the early intervention people they sent out said she showed a lot of signs of autism. In the meantime our pediatrician referred us to Children’s hospital to see a specialist. After almost a year of appointments the doctor’s officially dx’ed her with Asperger’s in February this year. Our son is a lot different than our daughter, but he has some “quirky” things about him too. I am hoping it is just him copying his sister……

Now Ella will be turning four and we are still seeing the doctor at Children’s hospital. She is great BUT we need more than one session a month. I wish we qualified for weekly occupational therapy, our insurance blows. It’s frustrating because I keep hearing if you only had Medicaid….. Well we don’t have Medicaid and when I spoke to my insurance company they gave me instructions on how to TRY to see IF we qualify for therapy. They actually send the doctors referral off to an outside company and then they decide if it is deemed necessary. They said it will probably be not necessary. Grrr! I don’t understand why if you have insurance you get less than if you’re on Medicaid.  We went to the school they did an IEP and said they can give her help under the Developmentally Delayed label but not under her DX because she is high functioning. (That whole thing is confusing to me) Anyways, I have several concerns about sending her to school. We have another meeting and she could start school as soon as the second week in January.

Other topics I want to get advice on are family, behavioral issues and schooling. We have several family members who just don’t get it. It ends up pissing us off. We get tired of their unsolicited suggestions and opinions, even when we tell them to stop. It’s to the point where we like to avoid them at times. Are we alone or do others have this problem too. We get criticized for not spanking Ella to correct her behavior. We learned spanking only exacerbates the situation. So we don’t. The tantrums are one of the hardest things I have ever had to deal with, more difficult than boot camp. As far as schooling I am considering home schooling any suggestions?

We are looking to chat with other parents who understand. We often wonder the “whys” of things. For example last year I had a sitter I was working in home so I was still around…. Anyways, this sitter had a teenage daughter and there were some issues and I had to let her go. She had argued with her daughter in front of my kids. Well the line “I’m not arguing with you” (between the mom and daughter) was said and for the past year Ella says that line EVERY day many times a day. We have tried to change the subject yet Ella keeps repeating that phrase (and a lot of others phrases) she also reenacts the Toy Story movie line for line. How do we try to change this behavior?

Thanks for any advice.

 

 

If guns kill people then pencils cause misspelled words

[Guest guest]

When my son was that age he too was having uncontrollable tantrums usually for no real reason. We tried everything and eventually tried the spanking, but like you said that didn't work either. His behavior became worse when he got a spanking, and the tantrum became more unbareable not to mention the guilt you felt for spanking your child. The worst part about the spanking was that he didn't seem to feel anything physically. We learned to just keep trying different methods. Usually I noticed these tantrums more when he needed to sleep. My son was have trouble with sleep at that time, and he still does at times today. I can see that rest is very important for these children to help control the roller coaster ride that we are on each day. My son also does better with me talking with

him about issues. The approach is key with these children as well. My husband naturally speaks louder and always seems mad, so my son reacts to him before anything really is said.

To: autism-aspergers Sent: Thursday, December 29, 2011 11:30 AMSubject: Re: New Here

Hello,

I have a daughter, Ella, too. She is nine with AS.

You are not alone. Family can have a difficult time understanding this, friends too. Your daughter is at a stage when she "should" be growing out of some of the toddler behaviors, but mine haven't yet. I think a lot of people know something about Autism, but Asperger's is still misunderstood by a lot of people. Keep working on getting your daughter what she needs. It's very frustrating and now that my girls are both over 7 our insurance coverage really goes down for therapies. I wish this were easier for all of us, but often times it is not. My life is a lot of two steps forward, one step back. You are your childs best advocate and don't doubt your ability to do what is best for her!!

Hello,

I am a 41 year old mom and my husband is 46. Our daughter Ella was dx’ed with Asperger’s. Our 22 month old son is a typical child. I sensed something was wrong when Ella was about seven months old, a mother’s intuition. I called the pediatrician and he said wait until her next appointment. Well finally by the time she was two and a half we got early intervention involved. They sent out a whole bunch of people and gave her therapy. It helped us a lot! Well Early intervention ends when kids turn three. All the early intervention people they sent out said she showed a lot of signs of autism. In the meantime our pediatrician referred us to Children’s hospital to see a specialist. After almost a year of appointments the doctor’s officially dx’ed her with Asperger’s in February this year. Our son is a lot different than our daughter, but he has some “quirky†things about him too. I am hoping it is just him

copying his sister……

Now Ella will be turning four and we are still seeing the doctor at Children’s hospital. She is great BUT we need more than one session a month. I wish we qualified for weekly occupational therapy, our insurance blows. It’s frustrating because I keep hearing if you only had Medicaid….. Well we don’t have Medicaid and when I spoke to my insurance company they gave me instructions on how to TRY to see IF we qualify for therapy. They actually send the doctors referral off to an outside company and then they decide if it is deemed necessary. They said it will probably be not necessary. Grrr! I don’t understand why if you have insurance you get less than if you’re on Medicaid. We went to the school they did an IEP and said they can give her help under the Developmentally Delayed label but not under her DX because she is high functioning. (That whole thing is confusing to me) Anyways, I have several concerns

about sending her to school. We have another meeting and she could start school as soon as the second week in January.

Other topics I want to get advice on are family, behavioral issues and schooling. We have several family members who just don’t get it. It ends up pissing us off. We get tired of their unsolicited suggestions and opinions, even when we tell them to stop. It’s to the point where we like to avoid them at times. Are we alone or do others have this problem too. We get criticized for not spanking Ella to correct her behavior. We learned spanking only exacerbates the situation. So we don’t. The tantrums are one of the hardest things I have ever had to deal with, more difficult than boot camp. As far as schooling I am considering home schooling any suggestions?

We are looking to chat with other parents who understand. We often wonder the “whys†of things. For example last year I had a sitter I was working in home so I was still around…. Anyways, this sitter had a teenage daughter and there were some issues and I had to let her go. She had argued with her daughter in front of my kids. Well the line “I’m not arguing with you†(between the mom and daughter) was said and for the past year Ella says that line EVERY day many times a day. We have tried to change the subject yet Ella keeps repeating that phrase (and a lot of others phrases) she also reenacts the Toy Story movie line for line. How do we try to change this behavior?

Thanks for any advice.

If guns kill people then pencils cause misspelled words

[Guest guest]

hi jerri To: "autism-aspergers " <autism-aspergers > Sent: Friday, December 30, 2011 1:48 AM Subject: Re: New Here

When my son was that age he too was having uncontrollable tantrums usually for no real reason. We tried everything and eventually tried the spanking, but like you said that didn't work either. His behavior became worse when he got a spanking, and the tantrum became more unbareable not to mention the guilt you felt for spanking your child. The worst part about the spanking was that he didn't seem to feel anything physically. We learned to just keep trying different methods. Usually I noticed these tantrums more when he needed to sleep. My son was have trouble with sleep at that time, and he still does at times today. I can see that rest is very important for these children to help control the roller coaster ride that we are on each day. My son also does better with me talking with

him about issues. The approach is key with these children as well. My husband naturally speaks louder and always seems mad, so my son reacts to him before anything really is said.

To: autism-aspergers Sent: Thursday, December 29, 2011 11:30 AMSubject: Re: New Here

Hello,

I have a daughter, Ella, too. She is nine with AS.

You are not alone. Family can have a difficult time understanding this, friends too. Your daughter is at a stage when she "should" be growing out of some of the toddler behaviors, but mine haven't yet. I think a lot of people know something about Autism, but Asperger's is still misunderstood by a lot of people. Keep working on getting your daughter what she needs. It's very frustrating and now that my girls are both over 7 our insurance coverage really goes down for therapies. I wish this were easier for all of us, but often times it is not. My life is a lot of two steps forward, one step back. You are your childs best advocate and don't doubt your ability to do what is best for her!!

Hello,

I am a 41 year old mom and my husband is 46. Our daughter Ella was dx’ed with Asperger’s. Our 22 month old son is a typical child. I sensed something was wrong when Ella was about seven months old, a mother’s intuition. I called the pediatrician and he said wait until her next appointment. Well finally by the time she was two and a half we got early intervention involved. They sent out a whole bunch of people and gave her therapy. It helped us a lot! Well Early intervention ends when kids turn three. All the early intervention people they sent out said she showed a lot of signs of autism. In the meantime our pediatrician referred us to Children’s hospital to see a specialist. After almost a year of appointments the doctor’s officially dx’ed her with Asperger’s in February this year. Our son is a lot different than our daughter, but he has some “quirky†things about him too. I am hoping it is just him

copying his sister……

Now Ella will be turning four and we are still seeing the doctor at Children’s hospital. She is great BUT we need more than one session a month. I wish we qualified for weekly occupational therapy, our insurance blows. It’s frustrating because I keep hearing if you only had Medicaid….. Well we don’t have Medicaid and when I spoke to my insurance company they gave me instructions on how to TRY to see IF we qualify for therapy. They actually send the doctors referral off to an outside company and then they decide if it is deemed necessary. They said it will probably be not necessary. Grrr! I don’t understand why if you have insurance you get less than if you’re on Medicaid. We went to the school they did an IEP and said they can give her help under the Developmentally Delayed label but not under her DX because she is high functioning. (That whole thing is confusing to me) Anyways, I have several concerns

about sending her to school. We have another meeting and she could start school as soon as the second week in January.

Other topics I want to get advice on are family, behavioral issues and schooling. We have several family members who just don’t get it. It ends up pissing us off. We get tired of their unsolicited suggestions and opinions, even when we tell them to stop. It’s to the point where we like to avoid them at times. Are we alone or do others have this problem too. We get criticized for not spanking Ella to correct her behavior. We learned spanking only exacerbates the situation. So we don’t. The tantrums are one of the hardest things I have ever had to deal with, more difficult than boot camp. As far as schooling I am considering home schooling any suggestions?

We are looking to chat with other parents who understand. We often wonder the “whys†of things. For example last year I had a sitter I was working in home so I was still around…. Anyways, this sitter had a teenage daughter and there were some issues and I had to let her go. She had argued with her daughter in front of my kids. Well the line “I’m not arguing with you†(between the mom and daughter) was said and for the past year Ella says that line EVERY day many times a day. We have tried to change the subject yet Ella keeps repeating that phrase (and a lot of others phrases) she also reenacts the Toy Story movie line for line. How do we try to change this behavior?

Thanks for any advice.

If guns kill people then pencils cause misspelled words

[Guest guest]

hi To: " autism-aspergers " <autism-aspergers > Sent: Friday, December 30, 2011 1:48 AM Subject: Re: New Here

When my son was that age he too was having uncontrollable tantrums usually for no real reason. We tried everything and eventually tried the spanking, but like you said that didn't work either. His behavior became worse when he got a spanking, and the tantrum became more unbareable not to mention the guilt you felt for spanking your child. The worst part about the spanking was that he didn't seem to feel anything physically. We learned to just keep trying different methods. Usually I noticed these tantrums more when he needed to sleep. My son was have trouble with sleep at that time, and he still does at times today. I can see that rest is very important for these children to help control the roller coaster ride that we are on each day. My son also does better with me talking with

him about issues. The approach is key with these children as well. My husband naturally speaks louder and always seems mad, so my son reacts to him before anything really is said.

To: autism-aspergers Sent: Thursday, December 29, 2011 11:30 AMSubject: Re: New Here

Hello,

I have a daughter, Ella, too. She is nine with AS.

You are not alone. Family can have a difficult time understanding this, friends too. Your daughter is at a stage when she " should " be growing out of some of the toddler behaviors, but mine haven't yet. I think a lot of people know something about Autism, but Asperger's is still misunderstood by a lot of people. Keep working on getting your daughter what she needs. It's very frustrating and now that my girls are both over 7 our insurance coverage really goes down for therapies. I wish this were easier for all of us, but often times it is not. My life is a lot of two steps forward, one step back. You are your childs best advocate and don't doubt your ability to do what is best for her!!

Hello,

I am a 41 year old mom and my husband is 46. Our daughter Ella was dx’ed with Asperger’s. Our 22 month old son is a typical child. I sensed something was wrong when Ella was about seven months old, a mother’s intuition. I called the pediatrician and he said wait until her next appointment. Well finally by the time she was two and a half we got early intervention involved. They sent out a whole bunch of people and gave her therapy. It helped us a lot! Well Early intervention ends when kids turn three. All the early intervention people they sent out said she showed a lot of signs of autism. In the meantime our pediatrician referred us to Children’s hospital to see a specialist. After almost a year of appointments the doctor’s officially dx’ed her with Asperger’s in February this year. Our son is a lot different than our daughter, but he has some “quirky†things about him too. I am hoping it is just him

copying his sister……

Now Ella will be turning four and we are still seeing the doctor at Children’s hospital. She is great BUT we need more than one session a month. I wish we qualified for weekly occupational therapy, our insurance blows. It’s frustrating because I keep hearing if you only had Medicaid….. Well we don’t have Medicaid and when I spoke to my insurance company they gave me instructions on how to TRY to see IF we qualify for therapy. They actually send the doctors referral off to an outside company and then they decide if it is deemed necessary. They said it will probably be not necessary. Grrr! I don’t understand why if you have insurance you get less than if you’re on Medicaid. We went to the school they did an IEP and said they can give her help under the Developmentally Delayed label but not under her DX because she is high functioning. (That whole thing is confusing to me) Anyways, I have several concerns

about sending her to school. We have another meeting and she could start school as soon as the second week in January.

Other topics I want to get advice on are family, behavioral issues and schooling. We have several family members who just don’t get it. It ends up pissing us off. We get tired of their unsolicited suggestions and opinions, even when we tell them to stop. It’s to the point where we like to avoid them at times. Are we alone or do others have this problem too. We get criticized for not spanking Ella to correct her behavior. We learned spanking only exacerbates the situation. So we don’t. The tantrums are one of the hardest things I have ever had to deal with, more difficult than boot camp. As far as schooling I am considering home schooling any suggestions?

We are looking to chat with other parents who understand. We often wonder the “whys†of things. For example last year I had a sitter I was working in home so I was still around…. Anyways, this sitter had a teenage daughter and there were some issues and I had to let her go. She had argued with her daughter in front of my kids. Well the line “I’m not arguing with you†(between the mom and daughter) was said and for the past year Ella says that line EVERY day many times a day. We have tried to change the subject yet Ella keeps repeating that phrase (and a lot of others phrases) she also reenacts the Toy Story movie line for line. How do we try to change this behavior?

Thanks for any advice.

If guns kill people then pencils cause misspelled words

[Guest guest]

Thanks Jerri and ,

Jerri, I know what you mean about them not feeling it. She

has a high tolerance for pain she seems to contemplate how to react when she

gets hurt. Another thing I don’t get is this…. She needed allergy testing,

earlier this summer she got blood drawn. It was agony for all involved

obviously mostly for Ella. Anyways, she is still obsessed with the band-aid

part on her arm.

As far as sleep Ella doesn’t EVER sleep well. We have used

white noise machines without success. She has sensory issues her hearing is

outstanding. She hears everything in the middle of the night. She has heard

accidents that happen about a half mile from here. At first we dismissed it but

then we hear or read about it in the paper and lo and behold there was an

accident. The newspaper guy, trash pickup anything it keeps her up. When she

does sleep it is very restless sleep. I have good hearing and I never hear any

of this even when I am awake. We have good windows I don’t understand how she

hears so much.

, Thanks, I do advocate for Ella. We are considering

moving to Chicago. Right now we live in a small town with minimal resources. I

am worried about sending her to school. We have one more meeting next week. I

think I have asked about everything but I am not sure. Honestly the whole thing

is confusing to us. They use all the acronyms and I hate it when they say don’t

worry it’ll be fine. Fine to whom???? They told us about a chair they use when

kids are “out of control†wth, I told them they are not allowed to use that OR

paddle her. Yes it is on the books in short it says teachers can “paddle†and

or strap the kids in the chair in an emergency. She will be four what kind of

emergency …..? The consolers even said kids like it…. whatever… they told me I would

have to have a talk with the principal and tell him I did not want it used on

her.

Ella is starting to outgrow some toddler behaviors, but new

stuff is starting. Yesterday we had a meltdown of colossal proportions at the

grocery store. I hate it when people stare. I just finished my shopping and

ignored the rest.

How do you deal with family? My MIL keeps saying all I need

is a wooden spoon, spare the rod spoil the child and quoting how she interprets

scripture. She thinks it is my parenting. Drives me batty at times. My mother

is the opposite she is like medicate her then she will be fine. (We want to

teach her how to deal with her behavior first before we even think about meds).

I am not one to hold my tongue and perhaps I am too vocal and then a power

struggle begins. At the end of the day we say we are they parents but they

still want to bring up their ideas even after repeated requests to stop. Ella

loves her grandparents and we don’t want to tell them they can’t see her if

they don’t stop.

Thanks To: "autism-aspergers " <autism-aspergers > Sent: Thursday, December 29, 2011 4:18 PM Subject: Re: New Here

When my son was that age he too was having uncontrollable tantrums usually for no real reason. We tried everything and eventually tried the spanking, but like you said that didn't work either. His behavior became worse when he got a spanking, and the tantrum became more unbareable not to mention the guilt you felt for spanking your child. The worst part about the spanking was that he didn't seem to feel anything physically. We learned to just keep trying different methods. Usually I noticed these tantrums more when he needed to sleep. My son was have trouble with sleep at that time, and he still does at times today. I can see that rest is very important for these children to help control the roller coaster ride that we are on each day. My son also does better with me talking with

him about issues. The approach is key with these children as well. My husband naturally speaks louder and always seems mad, so my son reacts to him before anything really is said.

To: autism-aspergers Sent: Thursday, December 29, 2011 11:30 AMSubject: Re: New Here

Hello,

I have a daughter, Ella, too. She is nine with AS.

You are not alone. Family can have a difficult time understanding this, friends too. Your daughter is at a stage when she "should" be growing out of some of the toddler behaviors, but mine haven't yet. I think a lot of people know something about Autism, but Asperger's is still misunderstood by a lot of people. Keep working on getting your daughter what she needs. It's very frustrating and now that my girls are both over 7 our insurance coverage really goes down for therapies. I wish this were easier for all of us, but often times it is not. My life is a lot of two steps forward, one step back. You are your childs best advocate and don't doubt your ability to do what is best for her!!

Hello,

I am a 41 year old mom and my husband is 46. Our daughter Ella was dx’ed with Asperger’s. Our 22 month old son is a typical child. I sensed something was wrong when Ella was about seven months old, a mother’s intuition. I called the pediatrician and he said wait until her next appointment. Well finally by the time she was two and a half we got early intervention involved. They sent out a whole bunch of people and gave her therapy. It helped us a lot! Well Early intervention ends when kids turn three. All the early intervention people they sent out said she showed a lot of signs of autism. In the meantime our pediatrician referred us to Children’s hospital to see a specialist. After almost a year of appointments the doctor’s officially dx’ed her with Asperger’s in February this year. Our son is a lot different than our daughter, but he has some “quirky†things about him too. I am hoping it is just him

copying his sister……

Now Ella will be turning four and we are still seeing the doctor at Children’s hospital. She is great BUT we need more than one session a month. I wish we qualified for weekly occupational therapy, our insurance blows. It’s frustrating because I keep hearing if you only had Medicaid….. Well we don’t have Medicaid and when I spoke to my insurance company they gave me instructions on how to TRY to see IF we qualify for therapy. They actually send the doctors referral off to an outside company and then they decide if it is deemed necessary. They said it will probably be not necessary. Grrr! I don’t understand why if you have insurance you get less than if you’re on Medicaid. We went to the school they did an IEP and said they can give her help under the Developmentally Delayed label but not under her DX because she is high functioning. (That whole thing is confusing to me) Anyways, I have several concerns

about sending her to school. We have another meeting and she could start school as soon as the second week in January.

Other topics I want to get advice on are family, behavioral issues and schooling. We have several family members who just don’t get it. It ends up pissing us off. We get tired of their unsolicited suggestions and opinions, even when we tell them to stop. It’s to the point where we like to avoid them at times. Are we alone or do others have this problem too. We get criticized for not spanking Ella to correct her behavior. We learned spanking only exacerbates the situation. So we don’t. The tantrums are one of the hardest things I have ever had to deal with, more difficult than boot camp. As far as schooling I am considering home schooling any suggestions?

We are looking to chat with other parents who understand. We often wonder the “whys†of things. For example last year I had a sitter I was working in home so I was still around…. Anyways, this sitter had a teenage daughter and there were some issues and I had to let her go. She had argued with her daughter in front of my kids. Well the line “I’m not arguing with you†(between the mom and daughter) was said and for the past year Ella says that line EVERY day many times a day. We have tried to change the subject yet Ella keeps repeating that phrase (and a lot of others phrases) she also reenacts the Toy Story movie line for line. How do we try to change this behavior?

Thanks for any advice.

If guns kill people then pencils cause misspelled words