Re: Re: How to discipline.....

January 17, 2012

I appreciate it. I just don't know how i should be handling these tantrums. I don't wanna do something and it be completely wrong. And everything I find online is for older children. Like explaining to them what they did wrong, I cant do that with him he doesn't know what I'm talking about. I tell him no all the time and when I know hes about to hit me I grab his hand and firmly tell him "NO"! But that really just seems to make it worse and then he either A. Wants to hit me even more. Or B. It hurts his feelings and he cries then hits me. And I know he knows its wrong. He looks at me with this weird look after he hits you, like he knows he wasn't aloud to do it. And when he does hit he immediately raises his hand to do it again and its almost like he waits to see what your reaction is.

Unless hes really mad then he just continues to keep hitting and head butting. To: autism-aspergers Sent: Tuesday, January 17, 2012 1:05 PM Subject: Re: How to discipline.....

Sara, he might have sensory issues causing him to behave this way. Some kids on the spectrum have sensory issues and some neuro-typical kiddos also have sensory processing dysfunction. Mine does all the behaviors you are listing and does it in school too when he's overwhelmed. We are starting OT again on a regular basis to see if it helps him again. The OT we loved changed jobs and we finally found her again. Anyway...hitting, biting, kicking, headbutting can all be signs of proprioceptive dysfunction. We give him "heavy work" and "deep pressure" to help keep him regulated. You might be able to get into an OT faster than the developmental pediatrician you were referred over to...

Some links for you to look at when you get a chance:

http://www.sensory-processing-disorder.com/proprioceptive-dysfunction.html

http://www.sensory-processing-disorder.com/heavy-work-activities.html

http://www.netplaces.com/sensory-integration-disorder/the-proprioceptive-sense/hitting-and-pushing.htm

>

> Our psychiatrist suggested rolling our son in a blanket and holding him until he calmed down.

>

> To: autism-aspergers

> Sent: Tuesday, January 17, 2012 11:15 AM

> Subject: RE: How to discipline.....

>

> Ã‚

> Throw some freezing cold water on him? Do you think that will calm him? Better to do that than to get hurt. Do you have him on any meds? Does he receive any anger control classes? Best of luck!

>

> --- Original Message ---

>

> Sent: January 17, 2012 1/17/12

> To: autism-aspergers

> Subject: How to discipline.....

>

> Ã‚

>

> I have been wondering how I should discipline or handle my son when he has his rage fits. When told no or something doesnt go the way he thinks its going to he attacks people or even his self. If no one is near him he will seek out the closest person to him and hit them, headbutt them or throw something. Sometimes though he will just hurt his self. In our house we have like indoor/outdoor kinda carpet with no padding underneath and the other night he got mad and slammed his head into the concrete. Then got mad cause he got hurt so he did the alligator death roll then got up and started throwing everything around him. Im tired of getting hurt and scared hes going to seriously hurt his self. What would be the best way to handle situations like this?

>

January 17, 2012

Colton doesnt really bite anymore. However he used to. But it wasnt because he was mad he would mostly do it when he was happy of if he got really excited and you were holding him he would bury his face into you and just bite really hard. But he does want other people to bite him. I find it strange. But as with any baby when they are really young its a game to pretend to eat their fingers or toes. Well this is how it started and then just got worse. He now wants people to actually bite him. And he will pry open your mouth to put his finger in your mouth and the harder you bite him the happier he is. He gets very upset if you do not do this to him. I still catch my older children doing this with him. They don't seem to understand that we have to do things differently with him and that things like that are bad.

To: autism-aspergers Sent: Tuesday, January 17, 2012 1:05 PM Subject: Re: How to discipline.....

Sara, he might have sensory issues causing him to behave this way. Some kids on the spectrum have sensory issues and some neuro-typical kiddos also have sensory processing dysfunction. Mine does all the behaviors you are listing and does it in school too when he's overwhelmed. We are starting OT again on a regular basis to see if it helps him again. The OT we loved changed jobs and we finally found her again. Anyway...hitting, biting, kicking, headbutting can all be signs of proprioceptive dysfunction. We give him "heavy work" and "deep pressure" to help keep him regulated. You might be able to get into an OT faster than the developmental pediatrician you were referred over to...

Some links for you to look at when you get a chance:

http://www.sensory-processing-disorder.com/proprioceptive-dysfunction.html

http://www.sensory-processing-disorder.com/heavy-work-activities.html

http://www.netplaces.com/sensory-integration-disorder/the-proprioceptive-sense/hitting-and-pushing.htm

>

> Our psychiatrist suggested rolling our son in a blanket and holding him until he calmed down.

>

> To: autism-aspergers

> Sent: Tuesday, January 17, 2012 11:15 AM

> Subject: RE: How to discipline.....

>

> Ã‚

> Throw some freezing cold water on him? Do you think that will calm him? Better to do that than to get hurt. Do you have him on any meds? Does he receive any anger control classes? Best of luck!

>

> --- Original Message ---

>

> Sent: January 17, 2012 1/17/12

> To: autism-aspergers

> Subject: How to discipline.....

>

> Ã‚

>

> I have been wondering how I should discipline or handle my son when he has his rage fits. When told no or something doesnt go the way he thinks its going to he attacks people or even his self. If no one is near him he will seek out the closest person to him and hit them, headbutt them or throw something. Sometimes though he will just hurt his self. In our house we have like indoor/outdoor kinda carpet with no padding underneath and the other night he got mad and slammed his head into the concrete. Then got mad cause he got hurt so he did the alligator death roll then got up and started throwing everything around him. Im tired of getting hurt and scared hes going to seriously hurt his self. What would be the best way to handle situations like this?

>

January 17, 2012

Yeah, He only waits for a response when he's just a little upset or if he just feels like being mean i guess. But when hes really upset about something like you told him "no" or even if you say "ow" when he hits you he just loses it. And hits either you or the closest person to him. Or if he has something in his hand, then watch out cause he's gonna throw it. I'm very fearful too of having a newborn around him. Colton is very clingy to me and his dad, So I don't think he is going to take this very well at all. And it scares me to think that he could hurt the baby. To: autism-aspergers Sent: Tuesday, January 17, 2012 1:44 PM Subject: Re: How to discipline.....

If you think he's in control of his behavior then I'd talk to a psych but he's 16 months old and hitting, biting etc. Kids in that age range go through that kind of a stage, especially when their communication skills are underdeveloped. No is an appropriate response...If you think he's doing it to get a reaction then the general thought on this is to provide him with the least amount of "emotion" or response when these things happen. Try to instead give more positive attention when you are seeing behaviors you'd prefer to see.

Doing the sensory based activities will not hurt your child. They are meant to be fun and game-like. We do them in 5-10 minute activities spread out throughout a day at about 1.5-2 hour intervals. You could "experiment" and see if he has better days after doing some of these activities/playing these games with him. I'd stay away from erratic movement activities but hugs (deep pressure type activities) and heavy work should be calming. Mine likes to hide under the couch cushions while lying on the floor...at 16 months, that just might be sufficient "deep pressure" for your son. Like a pillow fort...

> >

> > Our psychiatrist suggested rolling our son in a blanket and holding him until he calmed down.

> > From: "srt12780@" <srt12780@>

> > To: autism-aspergers

> > Sent: Tuesday, January 17, 2012 11:15 AM

> > Subject: RE: How to discipline.....

> >

> > Ãƒâ€šÃ‚

> > Throw some freezing cold water on him? Do you think that will calm him? Better to do that than to get hurt. Do you have him on any meds? Does he receive any anger control classes? Best of luck!

> >

> > --- Original Message ---

> >

> > From: sara degeer <bradleysmommy1@>

> > Sent: January 17, 2012 1/17/12

> > To: autism-aspergers

> > Subject: How to discipline.....

> >

> > Ãƒâ€šÃ‚

> >

> > I have been wondering how I should discipline or handle my son when he has his rage fits. When told no or something doesnt go the way he thinks its going to he attacks people or even his self. If no one is near him he will seek out the closest person to him and hit them, headbutt them or throw something. Sometimes though he will just hurt his self. In our house we have like indoor/outdoor kinda carpet with no padding underneath and the other night he got mad and slammed his head into the concrete. Then got mad cause he got hurt so he did the alligator death roll then got up and started throwing everything around him. Im tired of getting hurt and scared hes going to seriously hurt his self. What would be the best way to handle situations like this?

> >

>

January 17, 2012

The Drs. office is suppose to call me when they know something, She said something about having to fill out an application in order to go there. And then on top of that we have to wait for medicaid to approve this referral. So I'm not sure but my guess is it's gonna be a couple weeks.I hope I can get him seen soon. I would really like to learn how to deal with him on a daily basis. What do the drs do for the parents like can I take a class or can they teach me how to deal with these issues when they arise. Like his anger? From:

To: autism-aspergers Sent: Tuesday, January 17, 2012 1:48 PM Subject: Re: How to discipline.....

Mine sometimes bites his own toes, fingers and shirt collar...he now wears a necklace that is made for him to bite/chew on...

If the older kids stop, then Colton may resort to this on his own...How long did you say you have to wait before you can get into see the specialist?

> >

> > Our psychiatrist suggested rolling our son in a blanket and holding him until he calmed down.

> > From: "srt12780@" <srt12780@>

> > To: autism-aspergers

> > Sent: Tuesday, January 17, 2012 11:15 AM

> > Subject: RE: How to discipline.....

> >

> > Ãƒâ€šÃ‚

> > Throw some freezing cold water on him? Do you think that will calm him? Better to do that than to get hurt. Do you have him on any meds? Does he receive any anger control classes? Best of luck!

> >

> > --- Original Message ---

> >

> > From: sara degeer <bradleysmommy1@>

> > Sent: January 17, 2012 1/17/12

> > To: autism-aspergers

> > Subject: How to discipline.....

> >

> > Ãƒâ€šÃ‚

> >

> > I have been wondering how I should discipline or handle my son when he has his rage fits. When told no or something doesnt go the way he thinks its going to he attacks people or even his self. If no one is near him he will seek out the closest person to him and hit them, headbutt them or throw something. Sometimes though he will just hurt his self. In our house we have like indoor/outdoor kinda carpet with no padding underneath and the other night he got mad and slammed his head into the concrete. Then got mad cause he got hurt so he did the alligator death roll then got up and started throwing everything around him. Im tired of getting hurt and scared hes going to seriously hurt his self. What would be the best way to handle situations like this?

> >

>

January 17, 2012

The Drs. office is suppose to call me when they know something, She said something about having to fill out an application in order to go there. And then on top of that we have to wait for medicaid to approve this referral. So I'm not sure but my guess is it's gonna be a couple weeks.I hope I can get him seen soon. I would really like to learn how to deal with him on a daily basis. What do the drs do for the parents like can I take a class or can they teach me how to deal with these issues when they arise. Like his anger? From:

To: autism-aspergers Sent: Tuesday, January 17, 2012 1:48 PM Subject: Re: How to discipline.....

Mine sometimes bites his own toes, fingers and shirt collar...he now wears a necklace that is made for him to bite/chew on...

If the older kids stop, then Colton may resort to this on his own...How long did you say you have to wait before you can get into see the specialist?

> >

> > Our psychiatrist suggested rolling our son in a blanket and holding him until he calmed down.

> > From: "srt12780@" <srt12780@>

> > To: autism-aspergers

> > Sent: Tuesday, January 17, 2012 11:15 AM

> > Subject: RE: How to discipline.....

> >

> > Ãƒâ€šÃ‚

> > Throw some freezing cold water on him? Do you think that will calm him? Better to do that than to get hurt. Do you have him on any meds? Does he receive any anger control classes? Best of luck!

> >

> > --- Original Message ---

> >

> > From: sara degeer <bradleysmommy1@>

> > Sent: January 17, 2012 1/17/12

> > To: autism-aspergers

> > Subject: How to discipline.....

> >

> > Ãƒâ€šÃ‚

> >

> > I have been wondering how I should discipline or handle my son when he has his rage fits. When told no or something doesnt go the way he thinks its going to he attacks people or even his self. If no one is near him he will seek out the closest person to him and hit them, headbutt them or throw something. Sometimes though he will just hurt his self. In our house we have like indoor/outdoor kinda carpet with no padding underneath and the other night he got mad and slammed his head into the concrete. Then got mad cause he got hurt so he did the alligator death roll then got up and started throwing everything around him. Im tired of getting hurt and scared hes going to seriously hurt his self. What would be the best way to handle situations like this?

> >

>

January 17, 2012

lmao, well I pictured myself pouring water on him and then seeing his reaction. It was pretty funny. Hahaha! To: autism-aspergers Sent: Tuesday, January 17, 2012 2:41 PM Subject: Re: How to discipline.....

OMG, I know this is so not what this post was about but it just makes me think of the spray bottle idea with cats, lol - bad mental picture of Dr. Evil spraying Mini Me in the Austin Powers movies. ugh

>

> >Throw some freezing cold water on him? Do you think that will calm him? Better to do that than to get hurt. Do you have him on any meds? Does he receive any anger control classes? Best of luck!

> >

> >--- Original Message ---

> >

> >Sent: January 17, 2012 1/17/12

> >To: autism-aspergers

> >Subject: How to discipline.....

> >

> >Ã‚

> >

> > I have been wondering how I should discipline or handle my son when he has his rage fits. When told no or something doesnt go the way he thinks its going to he attacks people or even his self. If no one is near him he will seek out the closest person to him and hit them, headbutt them or throw something. Sometimes though he will just hurt his self. In our house we have like indoor/outdoor kinda carpet with no padding underneath and the other night he got mad and slammed his head into the concrete. Then got mad cause he got hurt so he did the alligator death roll then got up and started throwing everything around him. Im tired of getting hurt and scared hes going to seriously hurt his self. What would be the best way to handle situations like this?

> >

>

January 17, 2012

lmao, well I pictured myself pouring water on him and then seeing his reaction. It was pretty funny. Hahaha! To: autism-aspergers Sent: Tuesday, January 17, 2012 2:41 PM Subject: Re: How to discipline.....

OMG, I know this is so not what this post was about but it just makes me think of the spray bottle idea with cats, lol - bad mental picture of Dr. Evil spraying Mini Me in the Austin Powers movies. ugh

>

> >Throw some freezing cold water on him? Do you think that will calm him? Better to do that than to get hurt. Do you have him on any meds? Does he receive any anger control classes? Best of luck!

> >

> >--- Original Message ---

> >

> >Sent: January 17, 2012 1/17/12

> >To: autism-aspergers

> >Subject: How to discipline.....

> >

> >Ã‚

> >

> > I have been wondering how I should discipline or handle my son when he has his rage fits. When told no or something doesnt go the way he thinks its going to he attacks people or even his self. If no one is near him he will seek out the closest person to him and hit them, headbutt them or throw something. Sometimes though he will just hurt his self. In our house we have like indoor/outdoor kinda carpet with no padding underneath and the other night he got mad and slammed his head into the concrete. Then got mad cause he got hurt so he did the alligator death roll then got up and started throwing everything around him. Im tired of getting hurt and scared hes going to seriously hurt his self. What would be the best way to handle situations like this?

> >

>

January 18, 2012

That's good information, , because I also have those similar problems with my 3.5 year old (still not diagnosed...ugh!..) A MFT I am seeing suggested learning more about sensory integration dysfunction but I need OT as well! I am currently asking the school district for an OT evaluation. I have a feeling they will fight me. But I will keep trying with them and through my insurance.Gladys To: autism-aspergers Sent: Tuesday, January 17, 2012 10:05 AM Subject: Re: How to discipline.....

Sara, he might have sensory issues causing him to behave this way. Some kids on the spectrum have sensory issues and some neuro-typical kiddos also have sensory processing dysfunction. Mine does all the behaviors you are listing and does it in school too when he's overwhelmed. We are starting OT again on a regular basis to see if it helps him again. The OT we loved changed jobs and we finally found her again. Anyway...hitting, biting, kicking, headbutting can all be signs of proprioceptive dysfunction. We give him "heavy work" and "deep pressure" to help keep him regulated. You might be able to get into an OT faster than the developmental pediatrician you were referred over to...

Some links for you to look at when you get a chance:

http://www.sensory-processing-disorder.com/proprioceptive-dysfunction.html

http://www.sensory-processing-disorder.com/heavy-work-activities.html

http://www.netplaces.com/sensory-integration-disorder/the-proprioceptive-sense/hitting-and-pushing.htm

>

> Our psychiatrist suggested rolling our son in a blanket and holding him until he calmed down.

>

> To: autism-aspergers

> Sent: Tuesday, January 17, 2012 11:15 AM

> Subject: RE: How to discipline.....

>

> Ã‚

> Throw some freezing cold water on him? Do you think that will calm him? Better to do that than to get hurt. Do you have him on any meds? Does he receive any anger control classes? Best of luck!

>

> --- Original Message ---

>

> Sent: January 17, 2012 1/17/12

> To: autism-aspergers

> Subject: How to discipline.....

>

> Ã‚

>

> I have been wondering how I should discipline or handle my son when he has his rage fits. When told no or something doesnt go the way he thinks its going to he attacks people or even his self. If no one is near him he will seek out the closest person to him and hit them, headbutt them or throw something. Sometimes though he will just hurt his self. In our house we have like indoor/outdoor kinda carpet with no padding underneath and the other night he got mad and slammed his head into the concrete. Then got mad cause he got hurt so he did the alligator death roll then got up and started throwing everything around him. Im tired of getting hurt and scared hes going to seriously hurt his self. What would be the best way to handle situations like this?

>

January 18, 2012

Hi Sara ~ I have the same problem with my son. I understand what you are saying about him really understanding that hitting is just wrong because my son will also have that look and the weird thing is that he will "tell on himself". For example, my mom was taking care of him and his cousin was there, when I called he immediately told me, "I hit Alissa." He will even say that to me after he hits me, "I hit mommy." I really don't understand why he "tells on himself" or even why he does it. But I am sure it has something to do with his tactile sense being "out of sync". I just wish I could get OT help and I am trying but it seems all of us parents always seem to get the run around. Nevertheless, I am hopeful I'll be guided to the right place (maybe by an angel, I

hope!) I just don't know how much of this I can personally take. I've been praying and reaching out to so many people, it's ridiculous but I keep plugging along. I really have no choice and feel compelled to do so as he is my son. To: "autism-aspergers " <autism-aspergers > Sent: Tuesday, January 17, 2012 10:23 AM Subject: Re: Re: How to discipline.....

I appreciate it. I just don't know how i should be handling these tantrums. I don't wanna do something and it be completely wrong. And everything I find online is for older children. Like explaining to them what they did wrong, I cant do that with him he doesn't know what I'm talking about. I tell him no all the time and when I know hes about to hit me I grab his hand and firmly tell him "NO"! But that really just seems to make it worse and then he either A. Wants to hit me even more. Or B. It hurts his feelings and he cries then hits me. And I know he knows its wrong. He looks at me with this weird look after he hits you, like he knows he wasn't aloud to do it. And when he does hit he immediately raises his hand to do it again and its almost like he waits to see what your

reaction is.

Unless hes really mad then he just continues to keep hitting and head butting. To: autism-aspergers Sent: Tuesday, January 17, 2012 1:05 PM Subject: Re: How to discipline.....

Sara, he might have sensory issues causing him to behave this way. Some kids on the spectrum have sensory issues and some neuro-typical kiddos also have sensory processing dysfunction. Mine does all the behaviors you are listing and does it in school too when he's overwhelmed. We are starting OT again on a regular basis to see if it helps him again. The OT we loved changed jobs and we finally found her again. Anyway...hitting, biting, kicking, headbutting can all be signs of proprioceptive dysfunction. We give him "heavy work" and "deep pressure" to help keep him regulated. You might be able to get into an OT faster than the developmental pediatrician you were referred over to...

Some links for you to look at when you get a chance:

http://www.sensory-processing-disorder.com/proprioceptive-dysfunction.html

http://www.sensory-processing-disorder.com/heavy-work-activities.html

http://www.netplaces.com/sensory-integration-disorder/the-proprioceptive-sense/hitting-and-pushing.htm

>

> Our psychiatrist suggested rolling our son in a blanket and holding him until he calmed down.

>

> To: autism-aspergers

> Sent: Tuesday, January 17, 2012 11:15 AM

> Subject: RE: How to discipline.....

>

> Ã‚

> Throw some freezing cold water on him? Do you think that will calm him? Better to do that than to get hurt. Do you have him on any meds? Does he receive any anger control classes? Best of luck!

>

> --- Original Message ---

>

> Sent: January 17, 2012 1/17/12

> To: autism-aspergers

> Subject: How to discipline.....

>

> Ã‚

>

> I have been wondering how I should discipline or handle my son when he has his rage fits. When told no or something doesnt go the way he thinks its going to he attacks people or even his self. If no one is near him he will seek out the closest person to him and hit them, headbutt them or throw something. Sometimes though he will just hurt his self. In our house we have like indoor/outdoor kinda carpet with no padding underneath and the other night he got mad and slammed his head into the concrete. Then got mad cause he got hurt so he did the alligator death roll then got up and started throwing everything around him. Im tired of getting hurt and scared hes going to seriously hurt his self. What would be the best way to handle situations like this?

>

January 18, 2012

Sounds like delayed processing and possibly speech issues - may e have a speech eval done and neuropsych eval.Sent from my iPhone

Hi Sara ~ I have the same problem with my son. I understand what you are saying about him really understanding that hitting is just wrong because my son will also have that look and the weird thing is that he will "tell on himself". For example, my mom was taking care of him and his cousin was there, when I called he immediately told me, "I hit Alissa." He will even say that to me after he hits me, "I hit mommy." I really don't understand why he "tells on himself" or even why he does it. But I am sure it has something to do with his tactile sense being "out of sync". I just wish I could get OT help and I am trying but it seems all of us parents always seem to get the run around. Nevertheless, I am hopeful I'll be guided to the right place (maybe by an angel, I

hope!) I just don't know how much of this I can personally take. I've been praying and reaching out to so many people, it's ridiculous but I keep plugging along. I really have no choice and feel compelled to do so as he is my son. To: "autism-aspergers " <autism-aspergers > Sent: Tuesday, January 17, 2012 10:23 AM Subject: Re: Re: How to discipline.....

I appreciate it. I just don't know how i should be handling these tantrums. I don't wanna do something and it be completely wrong. And everything I find online is for older children. Like explaining to them what they did wrong, I cant do that with him he doesn't know what I'm talking about. I tell him no all the time and when I know hes about to hit me I grab his hand and firmly tell him "NO"! But that really just seems to make it worse and then he either A. Wants to hit me even more. Or B. It hurts his feelings and he cries then hits me. And I know he knows its wrong. He looks at me with this weird look after he hits you, like he knows he wasn't aloud to do it. And when he does hit he immediately raises his hand to do it again and its almost like he waits to see what your

reaction is.

Unless hes really mad then he just continues to keep hitting and head butting. To: autism-aspergers Sent: Tuesday, January 17, 2012 1:05 PM Subject: Re: How to discipline.....

Sara, he might have sensory issues causing him to behave this way. Some kids on the spectrum have sensory issues and some neuro-typical kiddos also have sensory processing dysfunction. Mine does all the behaviors you are listing and does it in school too when he's overwhelmed. We are starting OT again on a regular basis to see if it helps him again. The OT we loved changed jobs and we finally found her again. Anyway...hitting, biting, kicking, headbutting can all be signs of proprioceptive dysfunction. We give him "heavy work" and "deep pressure" to help keep him regulated. You might be able to get into an OT faster than the developmental pediatrician you were referred over to...

Some links for you to look at when you get a chance:

http://www.sensory-processing-disorder.com/proprioceptive-dysfunction.html

http://www.sensory-processing-disorder.com/heavy-work-activities.html

http://www.netplaces.com/sensory-integration-disorder/the-proprioceptive-sense/hitting-and-pushing.htm

>

> Our psychiatrist suggested rolling our son in a blanket and holding him until he calmed down.

>

> To: autism-aspergers

> Sent: Tuesday, January 17, 2012 11:15 AM

> Subject: RE: How to discipline.....

>

> Ã‚

> Throw some freezing cold water on him? Do you think that will calm him? Better to do that than to get hurt. Do you have him on any meds? Does he receive any anger control classes? Best of luck!

>

> --- Original Message ---

>

> Sent: January 17, 2012 1/17/12

> To: autism-aspergers

> Subject: How to discipline.....

>

> Ã‚

>

> I have been wondering how I should discipline or handle my son when he has his rage fits. When told no or something doesnt go the way he thinks its going to he attacks people or even his self. If no one is near him he will seek out the closest person to him and hit them, headbutt them or throw something. Sometimes though he will just hurt his self. In our house we have like indoor/outdoor kinda carpet with no padding underneath and the other night he got mad and slammed his head into the concrete. Then got mad cause he got hurt so he did the alligator death roll then got up and started throwing everything around him. Im tired of getting hurt and scared hes going to seriously hurt his self. What would be the best way to handle situations like this?

>

January 18, 2012

With my son it changes the anger/ rage to frustration/tears and unfortunately for him that's an easier emotion to come down from. I don't do it daily or even weekly. I only do it when it is absolutely necessary for safety reasons. You have to draw the line when there are other children/ adults in the house that will possibly get hurt. When it's between make my son cry (the aggressor) or my daughter getting hurt, it's going to be my son that cries. My son is going to be too big soon to manipulate like you can do with a toddler/ young child To: "autism-aspergers " <autism-aspergers > Sent: Wednesday, January 18, 2012 6:19 AM Subject: Re: How to discipline.....

I'm laughing about the squirt bottle idea. I think squirting him with cold water would just escalate my son (if someone did that to me it would make me furious), but I can't help but think how nice it would be to have a squirt bottle of cold water on my desk at work for when people get testy. :-)

Sent from my iPhone

January 18, 2012

Yes, I know what you mean. I have been trying to get him help since he was only

a few months old. Colton started out with motor delays first and then as he got

older those continued and now he has this whole list of things that just arent

right. Ive never in my life seen somone rock as much as him. Its pretty much all

day everyday. hand flapping, toe walking. He talks well to others though. And

for example if his cup is sitting next to him he wont even point to it if he

wants it or grab it.... Nothing. He just starts screaming and I have to figure

out thats what he wants. He refuses to hold his own cup as well. He learned how

to hold a bottle at 12 months but will not hold his cup, he makes me do it. And

on top of all this he has these fits of rage. I dont know how much more of them

I can take. We cant go anywhere. Its so bad in public. And he doesnt like to

leave home anyways. Hes constantly hitting and head butting people. Or throwing

stuff and

himself. Its complete madness. We just got our first referral on monday.

------------------------------

>Hi Sara ~ I have the same problem with my son. I understand what you are

saying about him really understanding that hitting is just wrong because my son

will also have that look and the weird thing is that he will " tell on himself " .

For example, my mom was taking care of him and his cousin was there, when I

called he immediately told me, " I hit Alissa. " He will even say that to me

after he hits me, " I hit mommy. " I really don't understand why he " tells on

himself " or even why he does it. But I am sure it has something to do with his

tactile sense being " out of sync " . I just wish I could get OT help and I am

trying but it seems all of us parents always seem to get the run around.

Nevertheless, I am hopeful I'll be guided to the right place (maybe by an angel,

I hope!) I just don't know how much of this I can personally take. I've been

praying and reaching out to so many people, it's ridiculous but I keep plugging

along. I really

have

> no choice and feel compelled to do so as he is my son.

>

>________________________________

>

>To: " autism-aspergers " <autism-aspergers >

>Sent: Tuesday, January 17, 2012 10:23 AM

>Subject: Re: Re: How to discipline.....

>

>I appreciate it. I just don't know how i should be handling these tantrums. I

don't wanna do something and it be completely wrong. And everything I find

online is for older children. Like explaining to them what they did wrong, I

cant do that with him he doesn't know what I'm talking about. I tell him no all

the time and when I know hes about to hit me I grab his hand and firmly tell him

" NO " ! But that really just seems to make it worse and then he either A. Wants to

hit me even more. Or B. It hurts his feelings and he cries then hits me. And I

know he knows its wrong. He looks at me with this weird look after he hits you,

like he knows he wasn't aloud to do it. And when he does hit he immediately

raises his hand to do it again and its almost like he waits to see what your

reaction is. Unless hes really mad then he just continues to keep hitting and

head butting.

>

>________________________________

>

>To: autism-aspergers

>Sent: Tuesday, January 17, 2012 1:05 PM

>Subject: Re: How to discipline.....

>

>Sara, he might have sensory issues causing him to behave this way. Some kids on

the spectrum have sensory issues and some neuro-typical kiddos also have sensory

processing dysfunction. Mine does all the behaviors you are listing and does it

in school too when he's overwhelmed. We are starting OT again on a regular basis

to see if it helps him again. The OT we loved changed jobs and we finally found

her again. Anyway...hitting, biting, kicking, headbutting can all be signs of

proprioceptive dysfunction. We give him " heavy work " and " deep pressure " to help

keep him regulated. You might be able to get into an OT faster than the

developmental pediatrician you were referred over to...

>

>Some links for you to look at when you get a chance:

>

>http://www.sensory-processing-disorder.com/proprioceptive-dysfunction.html

>

>http://www.sensory-processing-disorder.com/heavy-work-activities.html

>

>http://www.netplaces.com/sensory-integration-disorder/the-proprioceptive-sense/\

hitting-and-pushing.htm

>

>>

>> Our psychiatrist suggested rolling our son in a blanket and holding him until

he calmed down.

>>

>> To: autism-aspergers

>> Sent: Tuesday, January 17, 2012 11:15 AM

>> Subject: RE: How to discipline.....

>>

>> Â

>> Throw some freezing cold water on him? Do you think that will calm him?

Better to do that than to get hurt. Do you have him on any meds? Does he receive

any anger control classes? Best of luck!

>>

>> --- Original Message ---

>>

>> Sent: January 17, 2012 1/17/12

>> To: autism-aspergers

>> Subject: How to discipline.....

>>

>> Â

>>

>> I have been wondering how I should discipline or handle my son when he has

his rage fits. When told no or something doesnt go the way he thinks its going

to he attacks people or even his self. If no one is near him he will seek out

the closest person to him and hit them, headbutt them or throw something.

Sometimes though he will just hurt his self. In our house we have like

indoor/outdoor kinda carpet with no padding underneath and the other night he

got mad and slammed his head into the concrete. Then got mad cause he got hurt

so he did the alligator death roll then got up and started throwing everything

around him. Im tired of getting hurt and scared hes going to seriously hurt his

self. What would be the best way to handle situations like this?

>>

>

January 18, 2012

Lmao!!

------------------------------

>I'm laughing about the squirt bottle idea. I think squirting him with cold

water would just escalate my son (if someone did that to me it would make me

furious), but I can't help but think how nice it would be to have a squirt

bottle of cold water on my desk at work for when people get testy. :-)

>

>Sent from my iPhone

January 18, 2012

Well for me, I know it will be easier when im not pregnant anymore and can move

faster and get closer to him without him hitting or head butting me in the

belly. I do worry about after I have the baby... Him hurting Peyton. It scares

me to think about showing Colton the baby cause he just hits everyone all the

time..... I just want him to be nice...

------------------------------

>With my son it changes the anger/ rage to frustration/tears and unfortunately

for him that's an easier emotion to come down from. I don't do it daily or even

weekly. I only do it when it is absolutely necessary for safety reasons. You

have to draw the line when there are other children/ adults in the house that

will possibly get hurt. When it's between make my son cry (the aggressor) or my

daughter getting hurt, it's going to be my son that cries. My son is going to

be too big soon to manipulate like you can do with a toddler/ young child

>

>________________________________

>

>To: " autism-aspergers " <autism-aspergers >

>Sent: Wednesday, January 18, 2012 6:19 AM

>Subject: Re: How to discipline.....

>

>I'm laughing about the squirt bottle idea. I think squirting him with cold

water would just escalate my son (if someone did that to me it would make me

furious), but I can't help but think how nice it would be to have a squirt

bottle of cold water on my desk at work for when people get testy. :-)

>

>Sent from my iPhone

>

January 18, 2012

My daughter has had fits of rage since she was about 10 months old. At first we thought it was normal but now she is 4 1/2 and they just get worse. She can be the sweetest child on earth however when she gets mad it is a whole different story. However when my son was born she didnt hit him or anything she just kinda ignored him. She did try to sit on him a couple of time when he was laying on the floor but they do better well now. Besides the normal brother, sister stuff fighting over toys and stuff. She never trys to hurt him badly just a little pshing and stuff but he is two now so we just tell her no. My daughter's anger is very hard to control and the more she gets upset it gets every one upset. I try not to yell because that makes it worse. But just having to learn patience which is not easy. I hope all goes well.

To: autism-aspergers Sent: Wednesday, January 18, 2012 9:42 AMSubject: Re: Re: How to discipline.....

Well for me, I know it will be easier when im not pregnant anymore and can move faster and get closer to him without him hitting or head butting me in the belly. I do worry about after I have the baby... Him hurting Peyton. It scares me to think about showing Colton the baby cause he just hits everyone all the time..... I just want him to be nice... ------------------------------>With my son it changes the anger/ rage to frustration/tears and unfortunately for him that's an easier emotion to come down from. I don't do it daily or even weekly. I only do it when it is absolutely necessary for safety reasons. You have to draw the line when there are other children/ adults in the house that will possibly get hurt. When it's between make my son cry (the aggressor) or my daughter getting hurt, it's going to be my son that cries. My son is

going to be too big soon to manipulate like you can do with a toddler/ young child >> > >>>________________________________> >To: "autism-aspergers " <autism-aspergers > >Sent: Wednesday, January 18, 2012 6:19 AM>Subject: Re: How to discipline.....> >> >I'm laughing about the squirt bottle idea. I think squirting him with cold water would just escalate my

son (if someone did that to me it would make me furious), but I can't help but think how nice it would be to have a squirt bottle of cold water on my desk at work for when people get testy. :-)>> >>Sent from my iPhone>

January 18, 2012

Yeah when Colton was younger I thought wow, hes the happiest baby I have ever

seen. He never cried. He was always smiling at everyone and laughing. Now his

response to everyone is to just stare at them with this very serious face almost

like hes looking right through you and hits you. When my older kids walk up to

hug him his response is to hit. And this is all new to us and to my older kids

and its been hard trying to explain to them he doesnt mean to hurt them. I dont

think he even means to hit them, thats just his response to everything. My kids

usually dont play with him they keep their distance because they are scared of

getting hurt. it really makes me sad...

------------------------------

>

>My daughter has had fits of rage since she was about 10 months old. At first we

thought it was normal but now she is 4 1/2 and they just get worse. She can be

the sweetest child on earth however when she gets mad it is a whole different

story. However when my son was born she didnt hit him or anything she just kinda

ignored him. She did try to sit on him a couple of time when he was laying on

the floor but they do better well now. Besides the normal brother, sister stuff

fighting over toys and stuff. She never trys to hurt him badly just a little

pshing and stuff but he is two now so we just tell her no. My daughter's anger

is very hard to control and the more she gets upset it gets every one upset. I

try not to yell because that makes it worse. But just having to learn patience

which is not easy. I hope all goes well.

>

>To: autism-aspergers

>Sent: Wednesday, January 18, 2012 9:42 AM

>Subject: Re: Re: How to discipline.....

>

>Well for me, I know it will be easier when im not pregnant anymore and can move

faster and get closer to him without him hitting or head butting me in the

belly. I do worry about after I have the baby... Him hurting Peyton. It scares

me to think about showing Colton the baby cause he just hits everyone all the

time..... I just want him to be nice...

>

>------------------------------

>

>>With my son it changes the anger/ rage to frustration/tears and unfortunately

for him that's an easier emotion to come down from. I don't do it daily or even

weekly. I only do it when it is absolutely necessary for safety reasons. You

have to draw the line when there are other children/ adults in the house that

will possibly get hurt. When it's between make my son cry (the aggressor) or my

daughter getting hurt, it's going to be my son that cries. My son is going to

be too big soon to manipulate like you can do with a toddler/ young child

>>

>>________________________________

>>

>>To: " autism-aspergers " <autism-aspergers >

>>Sent: Wednesday, January 18, 2012 6:19 AM

>>Subject: Re: How to discipline.....

>>

>>I'm laughing about the squirt bottle idea. I think squirting him with cold

water would just escalate my son (if someone did that to me it would make me

furious), but I can't help but think how nice it would be to have a squirt

bottle of cold water on my desk at work for when people get testy. :-)

>>

>>Sent from my iPhone

>>

>

January 18, 2012

I have had a speech eval- he has expressive speech disorder & he has a neurologist appt in early Feb. I hope I can get more answers. Gladys

Sounds like delayed processing and possibly speech issues - may e have a speech eval done and neuropsych eval.Sent from my iPhone

Hi Sara ~ I have the same problem with my son. I understand what you are saying about him really understanding that hitting is just wrong because my son will also have that look and the weird thing is that he will "tell on himself". For example, my mom was taking care of him and his cousin was there, when I called he immediately told me, "I hit Alissa." He will even say that to me after he hits me, "I hit mommy." I really don't understand why he "tells on himself" or even why he does it. But I am sure it has something to do with his tactile sense being "out of sync". I just wish I could get OT help and I am trying but it seems all of us parents always seem to get the run around. Nevertheless, I am hopeful I'll be guided to the right place (maybe by an angel, I

hope!) I just don't know how much of this I can personally take. I've been praying and reaching out to so many people, it's ridiculous but I keep plugging along. I really have no choice and feel compelled to do so as he is my son. To: "autism-aspergers " <autism-aspergers > Sent: Tuesday, January 17, 2012 10:23 AM Subject: Re: Re: How to discipline.....

I appreciate it. I just don't know how i should be handling these tantrums. I don't wanna do something and it be completely wrong. And everything I find online is for older children. Like explaining to them what they did wrong, I cant do that with him he doesn't know what I'm talking about. I tell him no all the time and when I know hes about to hit me I grab his hand and firmly tell him "NO"! But that really just seems to make it worse and then he either A. Wants to hit me even more. Or B. It hurts his feelings and he cries then hits me. And I know he knows its wrong. He looks at me with this weird look after he hits you, like he knows he wasn't aloud to do it. And when he does hit he immediately raises his hand to do it again and its almost like he waits to see what your

reaction is.

Unless hes really mad then he just continues to keep hitting and head butting. To: autism-aspergers Sent: Tuesday, January 17, 2012 1:05 PM Subject: Re: How to discipline.....

Sara, he might have sensory issues causing him to behave this way. Some kids on the spectrum have sensory issues and some neuro-typical kiddos also have sensory processing dysfunction. Mine does all the behaviors you are listing and does it in school too when he's overwhelmed. We are starting OT again on a regular basis to see if it helps him again. The OT we loved changed jobs and we finally found her again. Anyway...hitting, biting, kicking, headbutting can all be signs of proprioceptive dysfunction. We give him "heavy work" and "deep pressure" to help keep him regulated. You might be able to get into an OT faster than the developmental pediatrician you were referred over to...

Some links for you to look at when you get a chance:

http://www.sensory-processing-disorder.com/proprioceptive-dysfunction.html

http://www.sensory-processing-disorder.com/heavy-work-activities.html

http://www.netplaces.com/sensory-integration-disorder/the-proprioceptive-sense/hitting-and-pushing.htm

>

> Our psychiatrist suggested rolling our son in a blanket and holding him until he calmed down.

>

> To: autism-aspergers

> Sent: Tuesday, January 17, 2012 11:15 AM

> Subject: RE: How to discipline.....

>

> Ã‚

> Throw some freezing cold water on him? Do you think that will calm him? Better to do that than to get hurt. Do you have him on any meds? Does he receive any anger control classes? Best of luck!

>

> --- Original Message ---

>

> Sent: January 17, 2012 1/17/12

> To: autism-aspergers

> Subject: How to discipline.....

>

> Ã‚

>

> I have been wondering how I should discipline or handle my son when he has his rage fits. When told no or something doesnt go the way he thinks its going to he attacks people or even his self. If no one is near him he will seek out the closest person to him and hit them, headbutt them or throw something. Sometimes though he will just hurt his self. In our house we have like indoor/outdoor kinda carpet with no padding underneath and the other night he got mad and slammed his head into the concrete. Then got mad cause he got hurt so he did the alligator death roll then got up and started throwing everything around him. Im tired of getting hurt and scared hes going to seriously hurt his self. What would be the best way to handle situations like this?

>

January 18, 2012

Colton has been seeing a neurologist since he was 11 montgs old. At 12 months

old he had to go to All Childrens Hospital and he had an MRI. They said it came

back normal. But they never really made it clear exactly what they were looking

for. I think they did it because of his small head size and his rocking.

------------------------------

>I have had a speech eval- he has expressive speech disorder & he has a

neurologist appt in early Feb. I hope I can get more answers.

>

>Gladys

>

>> Sounds like delayed processing and possibly speech issues - may e have a

speech eval done and neuropsych eval.

>>

>> Sent from my iPhone

>>

>> On Jan 18, 2012, at 12:11 AM, Gladys Fanning

wrote:

>>

>> Hi Sara ~ I have the same problem with my son. I understand what you are