Guest guest Posted March 12, 2008 Report Share Posted March 12, 2008 Hi Yes, our son is 16. We have a young men's shelter which is full and not appropriate in any case, and there are designated mental health placements but I have been told they are not appropriate or he does not qualify. We don't seem to have a whole lot for this age group and spaces are very limited. It usually takes months to get into anywhere, and honestly I don't feel this is the answer, I know he would get worse if he lost his only support. But, I do have to put something in place if things continue to descend. He took his celexa tonight again and seems to have made a shift somehow. Not sure if it is the medication or simply the realization that we have to make this work and we are all invested. I think he may actually have been able to feel my pain over all this, which would mean he allowed himself to feel. That would truly be a break through! Thanks for your interest and thoughts. How is your son doing? I had forgotten he was off medication until I read one of your recent posts. Is he able to function? Barb > > > > Thanks BJ. I hope so. Not sure just now. > > > > Need to find options beyond the young mens shelter, which is full, > > and not an appropriate place anyway (they told me this when we > called > > to just ask). This is what our " professionals " have continued to > > tell us to do. So it was actually good to have someone at the > > shelter tell us it was not appropriate(which is what I had said > > myself), and phoned and related that message to the psychologist > > asking them if they actually had any real solutions for us on this > > one. You can guess the response. So, nothing new, we know we are > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 12, 2008 Report Share Posted March 12, 2008 Hi , Oh God, hormonal hell! I can't imagine. Quick get some hormonal support! Or just grab a bottle of something strong to drown your sorrows. Now I know that's not the answer, but sometimes a glass of wine just takes the edge off and dulls the roar. Cheers! Hugs to you! Barb > > > > > I so relate to all of your email! Sometimes > > > I'd just be happy > > > to go under and be done with all of it. Had a bad > > > couple of days > > > here as well and am left feeling helpless and > > > hopeless. For the > > > moment I have given up the fight, cuz I have nothing > > > left to fight > > > with. But I know eventually something in me will > > > rise up and start > > > swinging again. > > > > > > Sometimes I think the best that can be done is to > > > cope and survive it > > > all. Sorry to sound so negative, just where I'm at > > > I guess. Things > > > have gotten pretty bad here again and we feel out of > > > options, not > > > sure what we can do anymore. Feeling like I'm in an > > > unending spin > > > cycle. > > > > > > Was listening to the Beatles song, Across the > > > Universe, and started > > > to cry at the line " Nothings gonna change my world " . > > > Kind of sums it > > > all up, for better or worse... My son asked why I > > > was crying and I > > > told him I just want him to get better. > > > > > > Hugs to you! You're definitely not alone on this > > > one. > > > Barb > > > > > > > > > > I wish that even if I thought I were drowning, I > > > could > > > > imagine him not going down with me, but that is an > > > > impossible concept. > > > > > > > > Anybody relating? > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > __________________________________________________________ > > > ______________ > > > > Looking for last minute shopping deals? > > > > Find them fast with Yahoo! Search. > > > > > http://tools.search.yahoo.com/newsearch/category.php? > category=shopping > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > __________________________________________________________ > ______________ > > Never miss a thing. Make Yahoo your home page. > > http://www.yahoo.com/r/hs > > > > > > > > > > > --------------------------------- > Never miss a thing. Make Yahoo your homepage. > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 12, 2008 Report Share Posted March 12, 2008 Thanks BJ. Me too. Wrote more in post to but there seems to be a shift already. Hope it continues tomorrow. Thanks for caring. Barb > > > > > > > > > > > > I so relate to all of your email! Sometimes I'd just be > > > > happy > > > > > > to go under and be done with all of it. Had a bad couple of > > days > > > > > > here as well and am left feeling helpless and hopeless. For > > the > > > > > > moment I have given up the fight, cuz I have nothing left to > > > > fight > > > > > > with. But I know eventually something in me will rise up and > > > > start > > > > > > swinging again. > > > > > > > > > > > > Sometimes I think the best that can be done is to cope and > > > > survive > > > > > it > > > > > > all. Sorry to sound so negative, just where I'm at I guess. > > > > Things > > > > > > have gotten pretty bad here again and we feel out of options, > > not > > > > > > sure what we can do anymore. Feeling like I'm in an unending > > > > spin > > > > > > cycle. > > > > > > > > > > > > Was listening to the Beatles song, Across the Universe, and > > > > started > > > > > > to cry at the line " Nothings gonna change my world " . Kind of > > > > sums > > > > > it > > > > > > all up, for better or worse... My son asked why I was crying > > and > > > > I > > > > > > told him I just want him to get better. > > > > > > > > > > > > Hugs to you! You're definitely not alone on this one. > > > > > > Barb > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I wish that even if I thought I were drowning, I could > > > > > > > imagine him not going down with me, but that is an > > > > > > > impossible concept. > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Anybody relating? > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > ______________________________________________________________________ > > > > > > ______________ > > > > > > > Looking for last minute shopping deals? > > > > > > > Find them fast with Yahoo! Search. > > > > > > http://tools.search.yahoo.com/newsearch/category.php? > > > > > category=shopping > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 13, 2008 Report Share Posted March 13, 2008 Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds was based on a picture that n drew. I heard that from an interview with . Sweet. svdbyhislove wrote: > > > I so relate to all of your email! Sometimes > > I'd just be happy > > to go under and be done with all of it. Had a bad > > couple of days > > here as well and am left feeling helpless and > > hopeless. For the > > moment I have given up the fight, cuz I have nothing > > left to fight > > with. But I know eventually something in me will > > rise up and start > > swinging again. > > > > Sometimes I think the best that can be done is to > > cope and survive it > > all. Sorry to sound so negative, just where I'm at > > I guess. Things > > have gotten pretty bad here again and we feel out of > > options, not > > sure what we can do anymore. Feeling like I'm in an > > unending spin > > cycle. > > > > Was listening to the Beatles song, Across the > > Universe, and started > > to cry at the line " Nothings gonna change my world " . > > Kind of sums it > > all up, for better or worse... My son asked why I > > was crying and I > > told him I just want him to get better. > > > > Hugs to you! You're definitely not alone on this > > one. > > Barb > > > > > > > I wish that even if I thought I were drowning, I > > could > > > imagine him not going down with me, but that is an > > > impossible concept. > > > > > > Anybody relating? > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > __________________________________________________________ > > ______________ > > > Looking for last minute shopping deals? > > > Find them fast with Yahoo! Search. > > > http://tools.search.yahoo.com/newsearch/category.php? category=shopping > > > > > > > > > > > > > __________________________________________________________ ______________ > Be a better friend, newshound, and > know-it-all with Yahoo! Mobile. Try it now. http://mobile.yahoo.com/;_ylt=Ahu06i62sR8HDtDypao8Wcj9tAcJ > --------------------------------- Never miss a thing. Make Yahoo your homepage. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 13, 2008 Report Share Posted March 13, 2008 You know, I would like to but I am on two anti depressants and I am not supposed to drink. I did have a sample wine at the grocery store the other day. Almost fell on my best side too. barb wrote: Hi , Oh God, hormonal hell! I can't imagine. Quick get some hormonal support! Or just grab a bottle of something strong to drown your sorrows. Now I know that's not the answer, but sometimes a glass of wine just takes the edge off and dulls the roar. Cheers! Hugs to you! Barb > > > > > I so relate to all of your email! Sometimes > > > I'd just be happy > > > to go under and be done with all of it. Had a bad > > > couple of days > > > here as well and am left feeling helpless and > > > hopeless. For the > > > moment I have given up the fight, cuz I have nothing > > > left to fight > > > with. But I know eventually something in me will > > > rise up and start > > > swinging again. > > > > > > Sometimes I think the best that can be done is to > > > cope and survive it > > > all. Sorry to sound so negative, just where I'm at > > > I guess. Things > > > have gotten pretty bad here again and we feel out of > > > options, not > > > sure what we can do anymore. Feeling like I'm in an > > > unending spin > > > cycle. > > > > > > Was listening to the Beatles song, Across the > > > Universe, and started > > > to cry at the line " Nothings gonna change my world " . > > > Kind of sums it > > > all up, for better or worse... My son asked why I > > > was crying and I > > > told him I just want him to get better. > > > > > > Hugs to you! You're definitely not alone on this > > > one. > > > Barb > > > > > > > > > > I wish that even if I thought I were drowning, I > > > could > > > > imagine him not going down with me, but that is an > > > > impossible concept. > > > > > > > > Anybody relating? > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > __________________________________________________________ > > > ______________ > > > > Looking for last minute shopping deals? > > > > Find them fast with Yahoo! Search. > > > > > http://tools.search.yahoo.com/newsearch/category.php? > category=shopping > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > __________________________________________________________ > ______________ > > Never miss a thing. Make Yahoo your home page. > > http://www.yahoo.com/r/hs > > > > > > > > > > > --------------------------------- > Never miss a thing. Make Yahoo your homepage. > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 13, 2008 Report Share Posted March 13, 2008 I'm glad you got that out. I don't think it's negativity. I like to think of it as cathartic. All those feelings bottled up-so NOT HEALTHY!! For me, talking about it helps me sort out everything. Dealing with ocd is tough when it's your own, but at least you've got all the facts because they are in your own head. Dealing with someone else's ocd is so often a frustrating guessing game. At least that's been my experience. I like that I've seen , in a very short time, people sharing great successes as well as some rough spots. If all I read here was the good stuff, I'd wonder what the heck was wrong with me. Ocd ain't often pretty around here. It gets truly ugly. Right now I am feeling like I'm drowning in the muck. One of those times when I feel like I'm not sure which path to take. As your child with ocd gets older, the situation seems more and more dire like I better make the right decisions now or she'll turn 18 and we'll be in big trouble. Having a kid with both ocd and oppositional problems can be crazy. She tries to fight things that are for her own recovery for pete's sake. I had a big blowup in the car trying to convince her that she should just try going to inpatient therapy. Here we are ready to spend a fortune and she's screaming and swearing at me telling me to stop humiliating her and how much she hates me. So, I conclude, talking to a troubled teen while driving-NO. barb wrote: " J'ai(I am) guru (the dispeller of darkness/lead to enlightenment),deva(?) ,Om (the oneness of the universe) " would be my rough translation. Ok, I like all that! I think you are right about the lyric being meant to be positive. I think it hit me because it went to the core of what I believe, it is out of our control, for good or for ill. What will be will be and all that. Feeling powerless to help your child, or that anyone can help, ever, is just too much to accept, but how it feels just now. Ok, so in case it's not clear from my posts, I'm depressed and hormonal, which doesn't diminish truth of our reality, but sure influences my perspective. I usually try to spare others my " mood " , but needed to get it out somewhere. Thanks for the outlet. Barb > > > I so relate to all of your email! Sometimes > > I'd just be happy > > to go under and be done with all of it. Had a bad > > couple of days > > here as well and am left feeling helpless and > > hopeless. For the > > moment I have given up the fight, cuz I have nothing > > left to fight > > with. But I know eventually something in me will > > rise up and start > > swinging again. > > > > Sometimes I think the best that can be done is to > > cope and survive it > > all. Sorry to sound so negative, just where I'm at > > I guess. Things > > have gotten pretty bad here again and we feel out of > > options, not > > sure what we can do anymore. Feeling like I'm in an > > unending spin > > cycle. > > > > Was listening to the Beatles song, Across the > > Universe, and started > > to cry at the line " Nothings gonna change my world " . > > Kind of sums it > > all up, for better or worse... My son asked why I > > was crying and I > > told him I just want him to get better. > > > > Hugs to you! You're definitely not alone on this > > one. > > Barb > > > > > > > I wish that even if I thought I were drowning, I > > could > > > imagine him not going down with me, but that is an > > > impossible concept. > > > > > > Anybody relating? > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > __________________________________________________________ > > ______________ > > > Looking for last minute shopping deals? > > > Find them fast with Yahoo! Search. > > > http://tools.search.yahoo.com/newsearch/category.php? category=shopping > > > > > > > > > > > > > __________________________________________________________ ______________ > Never miss a thing. Make Yahoo your home page. > http://www.yahoo.com/r/hs > --------------------------------- Be a better friend, newshound, and know-it-all with Yahoo! Mobile. Try it now. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 13, 2008 Report Share Posted March 13, 2008 I hope this doctor will be a help. Oh have I been through so many of them. I hope you've hit the jackpot, I really do. How old is your son? barb wrote: Thanks BJ. I hope so. Not sure just now. Need to find options beyond the young mens shelter, which is full, and not an appropriate place anyway (they told me this when we called to just ask). This is what our " professionals " have continued to tell us to do. So it was actually good to have someone at the shelter tell us it was not appropriate(which is what I had said myself), and phoned and related that message to the psychologist asking them if they actually had any real solutions for us on this one. You can guess the response. So, nothing new, we know we are on own on this one. Just feel " stuck between a rock and a hard place " ... We took our son to a doctor who practices alternative medicine, who we all liked and thought he might have some possible answers. He suggested doing some blood and urine based tests to rule out possible causes. We're stuck on, can't do urine based tests(absolute), and not willing, at the moment, to do blood test(has done in past). Haven't given this possibility up, just sit with it for now. We are focused on getting our son back on celexa, since we know he is worse since he has gone off it. He took his dose last night and seems improved already, I know this is not likely, probably coincidence, but can hope. Of course he thinks he's found a " new way " to combat the ocd and doesn't need the medication, and doesn't like the idea that maybe it is the medication helping. On this we will stand firm, he has to take the medication or he can't stay here. Only problem is...refer to paragraph one... Easy to take a stand, would be difficult to follow through. I know he is invested in staying here, so we can only hope we hold more power than the ocd on this one. I'll keep you posted. Thanks for responding. Barb > > > > I so relate to all of your email! Sometimes I'd just be happy > > to go under and be done with all of it. Had a bad couple of days > > here as well and am left feeling helpless and hopeless. For the > > moment I have given up the fight, cuz I have nothing left to fight > > with. But I know eventually something in me will rise up and start > > swinging again. > > > > Sometimes I think the best that can be done is to cope and survive > it > > all. Sorry to sound so negative, just where I'm at I guess. Things > > have gotten pretty bad here again and we feel out of options, not > > sure what we can do anymore. Feeling like I'm in an unending spin > > cycle. > > > > Was listening to the Beatles song, Across the Universe, and started > > to cry at the line " Nothings gonna change my world " . Kind of sums > it > > all up, for better or worse... My son asked why I was crying and I > > told him I just want him to get better. > > > > Hugs to you! You're definitely not alone on this one. > > Barb > > > > > > > I wish that even if I thought I were drowning, I could > > > imagine him not going down with me, but that is an > > > impossible concept. > > > > > > Anybody relating? > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > __________________________________________________________ > > ______________ > > > Looking for last minute shopping deals? > > > Find them fast with Yahoo! Search. > > http://tools.search.yahoo.com/newsearch/category.php? > category=shopping > > > > > > --------------------------------- Never miss a thing. Make Yahoo your homepage. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 13, 2008 Report Share Posted March 13, 2008 Ok, bad suggestion then! On a more health oriented suggestion I have found accupuncture and herbal remedies really helpful. Do take care of you, whatever that looks like. Hugs! Barb > > > > > > > I so relate to all of your email! Sometimes > > > > I'd just be happy > > > > to go under and be done with all of it. Had a bad > > > > couple of days > > > > here as well and am left feeling helpless and > > > > hopeless. For the > > > > moment I have given up the fight, cuz I have nothing > > > > left to fight > > > > with. But I know eventually something in me will > > > > rise up and start > > > > swinging again. > > > > > > > > Sometimes I think the best that can be done is to > > > > cope and survive it > > > > all. Sorry to sound so negative, just where I'm at > > > > I guess. Things > > > > have gotten pretty bad here again and we feel out of > > > > options, not > > > > sure what we can do anymore. Feeling like I'm in an > > > > unending spin > > > > cycle. > > > > > > > > Was listening to the Beatles song, Across the > > > > Universe, and started > > > > to cry at the line " Nothings gonna change my world " . > > > > Kind of sums it > > > > all up, for better or worse... My son asked why I > > > > was crying and I > > > > told him I just want him to get better. > > > > > > > > Hugs to you! You're definitely not alone on this > > > > one. > > > > Barb > > > > > > > > > > > > > I wish that even if I thought I were drowning, I > > > > could > > > > > imagine him not going down with me, but that is an > > > > > impossible concept. > > > > > > > > > > Anybody relating? > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > __________________________________________________________ > > > > ______________ > > > > > Looking for last minute shopping deals? > > > > > Find them fast with Yahoo! Search. > > > > > > > http://tools.search.yahoo.com/newsearch/category.php? > > category=shopping > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > __________________________________________________________ > > ______________ > > > Never miss a thing. Make Yahoo your home page. > > > http://www.yahoo.com/r/hs > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > --------------------------------- > > Never miss a thing. Make Yahoo your homepage. > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 13, 2008 Report Share Posted March 13, 2008 Hi , Yes, I feel the same, it helps to talk/write it out. Left inside it feels like I will implode, if not explode. Inpatient treatment is a big step. My teen would rather not participate in any treatment, and definitely does not want to talk at any given time, at least not about something of my interest. My analogy is that it is like asking someone if they would like their toenails removed systematically, and they are the ones who will have to do the removal. I don't think I would sign up willingly either.... I used this analogy when I enquired as to whether our son might receive CBT more than once a week, and the doctor suggested that request would have to come from our 16yr old son. NOT HAPPENING! Barb > > > > > I so relate to all of your email! Sometimes > > > I'd just be happy > > > to go under and be done with all of it. Had a bad > > > couple of days > > > here as well and am left feeling helpless and > > > hopeless. For the > > > moment I have given up the fight, cuz I have nothing > > > left to fight > > > with. But I know eventually something in me will > > > rise up and start > > > swinging again. > > > > > > Sometimes I think the best that can be done is to > > > cope and survive it > > > all. Sorry to sound so negative, just where I'm at > > > I guess. Things > > > have gotten pretty bad here again and we feel out of > > > options, not > > > sure what we can do anymore. Feeling like I'm in an > > > unending spin > > > cycle. > > > > > > Was listening to the Beatles song, Across the > > > Universe, and started > > > to cry at the line " Nothings gonna change my world " . > > > Kind of sums it > > > all up, for better or worse... My son asked why I > > > was crying and I > > > told him I just want him to get better. > > > > > > Hugs to you! You're definitely not alone on this > > > one. > > > Barb > > > > > > > > > > I wish that even if I thought I were drowning, I > > > could > > > > imagine him not going down with me, but that is an > > > > impossible concept. > > > > > > > > Anybody relating? > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > __________________________________________________________ > > > ______________ > > > > Looking for last minute shopping deals? > > > > Find them fast with Yahoo! Search. > > > > > http://tools.search.yahoo.com/newsearch/category.php? > category=shopping > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > __________________________________________________________ > ______________ > > Never miss a thing. Make Yahoo your home page. > > http://www.yahoo.com/r/hs > > > > > > > > > --------------------------------- > Be a better friend, newshound, and know-it-all with Yahoo! Mobile. Try it now. > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 13, 2008 Report Share Posted March 13, 2008 Thanks , me too. Not really looking for miracles, just family support, and strategies. Having spoken with him about this I believe he can do this much. Management of this disorder at home is 50% of dealing with this, were his words. Very validating for me, since this is what we have been saying and asking for help with for the last year with our current doctors. Our son is 16, a blessed age that... If we can just make it to about 20 we figure the hormonal and brain growth stuff should shift, we hope, hope, hope.... Barb > > > > > > I so relate to all of your email! Sometimes I'd just be > happy > > > to go under and be done with all of it. Had a bad couple of days > > > here as well and am left feeling helpless and hopeless. For the > > > moment I have given up the fight, cuz I have nothing left to > fight > > > with. But I know eventually something in me will rise up and > start > > > swinging again. > > > > > > Sometimes I think the best that can be done is to cope and > survive > > it > > > all. Sorry to sound so negative, just where I'm at I guess. > Things > > > have gotten pretty bad here again and we feel out of options, not > > > sure what we can do anymore. Feeling like I'm in an unending > spin > > > cycle. > > > > > > Was listening to the Beatles song, Across the Universe, and > started > > > to cry at the line " Nothings gonna change my world " . Kind of > sums > > it > > > all up, for better or worse... My son asked why I was crying and > I > > > told him I just want him to get better. > > > > > > Hugs to you! You're definitely not alone on this one. > > > Barb > > > > > > > > > > I wish that even if I thought I were drowning, I could > > > > imagine him not going down with me, but that is an > > > > impossible concept. > > > > > > > > Anybody relating? > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > __________________________________________________________ > > > ______________ > > > > Looking for last minute shopping deals? > > > > Find them fast with Yahoo! Search. > > > http://tools.search.yahoo.com/newsearch/category.php? > > category=shopping > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > --------------------------------- > Never miss a thing. Make Yahoo your homepage. > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 13, 2008 Report Share Posted March 13, 2008 Thanks , me too. Not really looking for miracles, just family support, and strategies. Having spoken with him about this I believe he can do this much. Management of this disorder at home is 50% of dealing with this, were his words. Very validating for me, since this is what we have been saying and asking for help with for the last year with our current doctors. Our son is 16, a blessed age that... If we can just make it to about 20 we figure the hormonal and brain growth stuff should shift, we hope, hope, hope.... Barb > > > > > > I so relate to all of your email! Sometimes I'd just be > happy > > > to go under and be done with all of it. Had a bad couple of days > > > here as well and am left feeling helpless and hopeless. For the > > > moment I have given up the fight, cuz I have nothing left to > fight > > > with. But I know eventually something in me will rise up and > start > > > swinging again. > > > > > > Sometimes I think the best that can be done is to cope and > survive > > it > > > all. Sorry to sound so negative, just where I'm at I guess. > Things > > > have gotten pretty bad here again and we feel out of options, not > > > sure what we can do anymore. Feeling like I'm in an unending > spin > > > cycle. > > > > > > Was listening to the Beatles song, Across the Universe, and > started > > > to cry at the line " Nothings gonna change my world " . Kind of > sums > > it > > > all up, for better or worse... My son asked why I was crying and > I > > > told him I just want him to get better. > > > > > > Hugs to you! You're definitely not alone on this one. > > > Barb > > > > > > > > > > I wish that even if I thought I were drowning, I could > > > > imagine him not going down with me, but that is an > > > > impossible concept. > > > > > > > > Anybody relating? > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > __________________________________________________________ > > > ______________ > > > > Looking for last minute shopping deals? > > > > Find them fast with Yahoo! Search. > > > http://tools.search.yahoo.com/newsearch/category.php? > > category=shopping > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > --------------------------------- > Never miss a thing. Make Yahoo your homepage. > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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