Guest guest Posted February 10, 2009 Report Share Posted February 10, 2009 My dd is having a really hard time at school this year. Socially things aren't bad. She has some friends at school, mostly other kids on the spectrum. Which is fine with me, they can relate better. Outside of school she is still isolated. She is very stressed and anxious which is causing problems across the board. Her anxiety is keeping her from a lot of things that she used to love. Like her horseback riding, which has always been a major passion/perseveration. All she wants to do is be at home and retreat into the world of Japanese Anime and Manga. Her migraines, which I think are stressed induced have kept her out of school for over a week. She went back yesterday and had a rough time of it. Her resource room teacher asked to see my dd's binder from her foods class and refused, she refused to do any work, and actually hid under a table in the resource room for about 20 min. Now this behavior is not unusual for home, it is highly unusual for school. Her teacher was frustrated by all this but on the other hand was just happy she was back at school. We both know that something is going on but for whatever reason, she just cannot articulate the problem. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 10, 2009 Report Share Posted February 10, 2009 How old is your daughter? I've noticed that a lot of our kids start having increased anxiety at around 9-10 yrs old, and again in Jr. High -- a lot of this is due to hormonal changes. In the group I run I've been getting a lot of calls from parents who's kids' anxiety has gotten to the point where it really interferes with school and their overall enjoyment of life. I haven't been keeping notes but I know that a whole lot of the kids who are put on antidepressants or stimulants start doing much better -- decreased anxiety, better coping, improved social skills (due to less anxiety), and better learning. Meds certainly helped for my son -- he wouldn't be in school without them. Also we really, really need to watch our kids for depression. It's quite common and can have disastrous affects. Not trying to be melodramatic -- we've had several higher functioning girls & boys in our group in the hospital for suicide attempts. Medication is a hard choice to make. It's not the only answer, is not right for everyone, is not a cure-all. I'm not laying any guilt trips on anyone. I just want people to know that anxiety & depression are more than just something that makes our kids hard to handle at home and in class. (This is not directed at you Carol -- I've talked to a number of parents this year who aren't really clueing in on how miserable their child is and that they really need to look at all their options and take anxiety & depression seriously.) Also, many many Drs and mental health care folks don't know how to recognize or treat anxiety & depression in our kids. If your Dr pooh-poohs your concerns, find someone who knows mental health & autism. Good luck Carol. Your daughter is lucky to have a mom who's looking out for her and working hard to take care of her. -- Cassie carol379 wrote: > My dd is having a really hard time at school this year. Socially > things aren't bad. She has some friends at school, mostly other kids > on the spectrum. Which is fine with me, they can relate better. > Outside of school she is still isolated. She is very stressed and > anxious which is causing problems across the board. Her anxiety is > keeping her from a lot of things that she used to love. Like her > horseback riding, which has always been a major > passion/perseveration. All she wants to do is be at home and retreat > into the world of Japanese Anime and Manga. > > Her migraines, which I think are stressed induced have kept her out > of school for over a week. She went back yesterday and had a rough > time of it. Her resource room teacher asked to see my dd's binder > from her foods class and refused, she refused to do any work, > and actually hid under a table in the resource room for about 20 min. > > Now this behavior is not unusual for home, it is highly unusual for > school. Her teacher was frustrated by all this but on the other hand > was just happy she was back at school. We both know that something > is going on but for whatever reason, she just cannot articulate the > problem. > > -- -- Cassie Zupke Director, Open Doors Now Click the link below to join our new Open Doors Now group information site to access all our group news, calendar, forums, and current autism information. http://www.bigtent.com/hosted/opndrs/invitation?hosted_key=a46063592584264652878\ e483a3a1cf2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 10, 2009 Report Share Posted February 10, 2009 How old is your daughter? I've noticed that a lot of our kids start having increased anxiety at around 9-10 yrs old, and again in Jr. High -- a lot of this is due to hormonal changes. In the group I run I've been getting a lot of calls from parents who's kids' anxiety has gotten to the point where it really interferes with school and their overall enjoyment of life. I haven't been keeping notes but I know that a whole lot of the kids who are put on antidepressants or stimulants start doing much better -- decreased anxiety, better coping, improved social skills (due to less anxiety), and better learning. Meds certainly helped for my son -- he wouldn't be in school without them. Also we really, really need to watch our kids for depression. It's quite common and can have disastrous affects. Not trying to be melodramatic -- we've had several higher functioning girls & boys in our group in the hospital for suicide attempts. Medication is a hard choice to make. It's not the only answer, is not right for everyone, is not a cure-all. I'm not laying any guilt trips on anyone. I just want people to know that anxiety & depression are more than just something that makes our kids hard to handle at home and in class. (This is not directed at you Carol -- I've talked to a number of parents this year who aren't really clueing in on how miserable their child is and that they really need to look at all their options and take anxiety & depression seriously.) Also, many many Drs and mental health care folks don't know how to recognize or treat anxiety & depression in our kids. If your Dr pooh-poohs your concerns, find someone who knows mental health & autism. Good luck Carol. Your daughter is lucky to have a mom who's looking out for her and working hard to take care of her. -- Cassie carol379 wrote: > My dd is having a really hard time at school this year. Socially > things aren't bad. She has some friends at school, mostly other kids > on the spectrum. Which is fine with me, they can relate better. > Outside of school she is still isolated. She is very stressed and > anxious which is causing problems across the board. Her anxiety is > keeping her from a lot of things that she used to love. Like her > horseback riding, which has always been a major > passion/perseveration. All she wants to do is be at home and retreat > into the world of Japanese Anime and Manga. > > Her migraines, which I think are stressed induced have kept her out > of school for over a week. She went back yesterday and had a rough > time of it. Her resource room teacher asked to see my dd's binder > from her foods class and refused, she refused to do any work, > and actually hid under a table in the resource room for about 20 min. > > Now this behavior is not unusual for home, it is highly unusual for > school. Her teacher was frustrated by all this but on the other hand > was just happy she was back at school. We both know that something > is going on but for whatever reason, she just cannot articulate the > problem. > > -- -- Cassie Zupke Director, Open Doors Now Click the link below to join our new Open Doors Now group information site to access all our group news, calendar, forums, and current autism information. http://www.bigtent.com/hosted/opndrs/invitation?hosted_key=a46063592584264652878\ e483a3a1cf2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 11, 2009 Report Share Posted February 11, 2009 Hi. My daughter really struggled with school. She coped ok with it while she was in there (a few incidents of aggression though) but as soon as she came out the school doors she would kick and punch me, hit her baby brother and run off. Other parents used to have to help me catch her before she ran into the road. All her built up stress from the school day would just erupt the moment she got out. She was the same in the mornings before school, we were always about half an hour late. I made the decision after 2 years of school to home educate (I am not suggesting you do this, not everyone has the choice I know, it was a personal decision). She now goes to Brownies, cheerleading, ice skating club and has skating lessons during the day when all the other kids are at school. She enjoys the 'after school' activities now as she isn't so exhausted and stressed out. She still doesn't really talk to any of the other children at her clubs, and I wouldn't even say she enjoys their company but she enjoys the activities. She has a few friends but for just having a few friends is a huge achievement. Interestingly though, her friends all have siblings with special needs so are obvioulsy, already more accepting of her and don't give up on her just because she won't always talk to them. They take the lead and include her, which a lot of other children won't do with her because they often get nothing back from her. What I am trying to say is - At school she was expected to be well behaved and fit in with the other children and the school routine, She basically had to put aside the real her and 'act normal' for the duration of school. The stress of doing so was so great that as soon as school was over for the day, it was like taking the lid of a boiling pot, she would totally melt down and go nuts for the rest of the day. She was so exhausted by this, so was I! Maybe your daughter is at a stage where she needs to rest from social activites for a while and will get back into them when she feels more able to cope with it all. . Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 18, 2009 Report Share Posted February 18, 2009 I just > feel so helpless and that is a horrible feeling. Carol yes carol this is of so much true and can be of more emotionally crippling than life itself. when one feels helpless they often feel hopeless as well. it is of a vicious cycle of depression that just cycles into full circles in the life of me. It is of like being on a roller coaster that never stops it just goes up and down and jerks you to the left and right over and over and even when you can see what should be of the end of the ride it just zooms past never letting you off,the only way out is of to jump at least that is of what it seems at times.... but is not healthy or logically correct things to do. sondra Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 18, 2009 Report Share Posted February 18, 2009 I just > feel so helpless and that is a horrible feeling. Carol yes carol this is of so much true and can be of more emotionally crippling than life itself. when one feels helpless they often feel hopeless as well. it is of a vicious cycle of depression that just cycles into full circles in the life of me. It is of like being on a roller coaster that never stops it just goes up and down and jerks you to the left and right over and over and even when you can see what should be of the end of the ride it just zooms past never letting you off,the only way out is of to jump at least that is of what it seems at times.... but is not healthy or logically correct things to do. sondra Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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