Re: on the run, he's at it again

[Guest guest]

You need to get one of those GPS tracker bracelets for him! (my only advise) I would put up cones and set some boundries. Seriously, big ORANGE cones!!

To: autism-aspergers Sent: Thu, June 16, 2011 4:28:47 PMSubject: on the run, he's at it again

Okay,My 3.5 year old son runs off. I posted about this before, but I need some new ideas. This week, once, up to 3 times a day he has gotten away from me. Not just 10 or 20 or even 50 feet. I'm talking about running off, going around the bend where I can't see, ignoring all requests to come back. I had to employ the help of strangers to corral him while I caught up...then today, my worst nightmare!We were home, I was talking to my neighbor for a minute or two. He goes 10 feet away to see if the plants need water, I look up and he's GONE! We looked everywhere, couldn't find him, so I had to call the police. The groundskeeper where we lived found him 15 minutes later, thank goodness, but I was hysterical. my question: what kind of therapist deals with this type of problem? He's newly diagnosed, so a lot of his therapy has not started yet, but who do I discuss this with? Is it OT? social skills? psychiatrist? ABA? or what?

Thanks so much for any guidance.

[Guest guest]

You need to get one of those GPS tracker bracelets for him! (my only advise) I would put up cones and set some boundries. Seriously, big ORANGE cones!!

To: autism-aspergers Sent: Thu, June 16, 2011 4:28:47 PMSubject: on the run, he's at it again

Okay,My 3.5 year old son runs off. I posted about this before, but I need some new ideas. This week, once, up to 3 times a day he has gotten away from me. Not just 10 or 20 or even 50 feet. I'm talking about running off, going around the bend where I can't see, ignoring all requests to come back. I had to employ the help of strangers to corral him while I caught up...then today, my worst nightmare!We were home, I was talking to my neighbor for a minute or two. He goes 10 feet away to see if the plants need water, I look up and he's GONE! We looked everywhere, couldn't find him, so I had to call the police. The groundskeeper where we lived found him 15 minutes later, thank goodness, but I was hysterical. my question: what kind of therapist deals with this type of problem? He's newly diagnosed, so a lot of his therapy has not started yet, but who do I discuss this with? Is it OT? social skills? psychiatrist? ABA? or what?

Thanks so much for any guidance.

[Guest guest]

What kind of punishment are you using? If you are not using

something that is harsh enough to make him understand that this is

not a game to you, then he will never have a reason to stop. I

personally advocate spanking, others advocate time outs, but you

have to use something and use it consistently - and it has to be

strong and harsh enough to get him out of the mindset that he is

playing a game with you.

Remember, you are the parent. You can still be his friend, and his

playmate, but you have to also be the parent and make the rules...

and enforce punishments if he disobeys them... yes, even at 3.5.

With my oldest one, we had decided to not use spanking as a

discipline, until we lost so much control that she thought we were

just playing a game. She looked at it like disobeying the rules was

a way to get positive attention from us, to do things that caused us

to make lots of noise and hold her for a while. She would even

laugh while we were trying to catch her, and cry when we did catch

her because the game was over. Until she tried to jump out of a

window (before seat belts) while the car was moving. Faced with

death, or doing something we didn't want to have to do, we chose to

let her live and to deal with our own guilt ourselves.

She realized that day that what she was doing was a game to her, but

not to us. She tried to jump out of the car five more times that

afternoon. At the end of the day we were in tears, the kid was

sullen and angry, but she stopped. She never tried it again, and

went back to her bubbly happy self in a few hours.

Me and my wife sat and talked about the experience afterward, and

realized that if we were going to use this (and others) form of

punishment, it had to be that "This is wrong, ALWAYS!" In other

words, we cannot allow the behavior in one circumstance, and not

allow it in another. It has to be black and white to the little'un

so that the kids know it is wrong, or right, always.

That is what worked for me - and my personal experience. I

would ask everyone to respect my opinion, the wisdom that I have

acquired over a lifetime through three children who are all happy

healthy adults now, and not flame me, accuse me, or call me names.

This si not advice, just an example of my life, an experience I had,

and what I did about it.

Okay,

My 3.5 year old son runs off. I posted about this before, but I need some new ideas. This week, once, up to 3 times a day he has gotten away from me. Not just 10 or 20 or even 50 feet. I'm talking about running off, going around the bend where I can't see, ignoring all requests to come back. I had to employ the help of strangers to corral him while I caught up...then today, my worst nightmare!

We were home, I was talking to my neighbor for a minute or two. He goes 10 feet away to see if the plants need water, I look up and he's GONE! We looked everywhere, couldn't find him, so I had to call the police. The groundskeeper where we lived found him 15 minutes later, thank goodness, but I was hysterical. my question: what kind of therapist deals with this type of problem? He's newly diagnosed, so a lot of his therapy has not started yet, but who do I discuss this with? Is it OT? social skills? psychiatrist? ABA? or what? Thanks so much for any guidance.

[Guest guest]

What kind of punishment are you using? If you are not using

something that is harsh enough to make him understand that this is

not a game to you, then he will never have a reason to stop. I

personally advocate spanking, others advocate time outs, but you

have to use something and use it consistently - and it has to be

strong and harsh enough to get him out of the mindset that he is

playing a game with you.

Remember, you are the parent. You can still be his friend, and his

playmate, but you have to also be the parent and make the rules...

and enforce punishments if he disobeys them... yes, even at 3.5.

With my oldest one, we had decided to not use spanking as a

discipline, until we lost so much control that she thought we were

just playing a game. She looked at it like disobeying the rules was

a way to get positive attention from us, to do things that caused us

to make lots of noise and hold her for a while. She would even

laugh while we were trying to catch her, and cry when we did catch

her because the game was over. Until she tried to jump out of a

window (before seat belts) while the car was moving. Faced with

death, or doing something we didn't want to have to do, we chose to

let her live and to deal with our own guilt ourselves.

She realized that day that what she was doing was a game to her, but

not to us. She tried to jump out of the car five more times that

afternoon. At the end of the day we were in tears, the kid was

sullen and angry, but she stopped. She never tried it again, and

went back to her bubbly happy self in a few hours.

Me and my wife sat and talked about the experience afterward, and

realized that if we were going to use this (and others) form of

punishment, it had to be that "This is wrong, ALWAYS!" In other

words, we cannot allow the behavior in one circumstance, and not

allow it in another. It has to be black and white to the little'un

so that the kids know it is wrong, or right, always.

That is what worked for me - and my personal experience. I

would ask everyone to respect my opinion, the wisdom that I have

acquired over a lifetime through three children who are all happy

healthy adults now, and not flame me, accuse me, or call me names.

This si not advice, just an example of my life, an experience I had,

and what I did about it.

Okay,

My 3.5 year old son runs off. I posted about this before, but I need some new ideas. This week, once, up to 3 times a day he has gotten away from me. Not just 10 or 20 or even 50 feet. I'm talking about running off, going around the bend where I can't see, ignoring all requests to come back. I had to employ the help of strangers to corral him while I caught up...then today, my worst nightmare!

We were home, I was talking to my neighbor for a minute or two. He goes 10 feet away to see if the plants need water, I look up and he's GONE! We looked everywhere, couldn't find him, so I had to call the police. The groundskeeper where we lived found him 15 minutes later, thank goodness, but I was hysterical. my question: what kind of therapist deals with this type of problem? He's newly diagnosed, so a lot of his therapy has not started yet, but who do I discuss this with? Is it OT? social skills? psychiatrist? ABA? or what? Thanks so much for any guidance.

[Guest guest]

sounds like my son....we had to call the police as well..... My best advice is to not let him free.... put him back in a stroller, use an arm band that you use for toddlers ect. No matter what you just cant turn your back. I know its hard. Mine is my second of 4 and when he ran i had a newborn . It was a struggle but i promise it does get better. He should be sent to see a behavioral therapist! She will give several ideas. Consistency is key. Follow up on everything you say and buy an extra set of eyes!!! lolDaisy: wife to , Mom to Adayla, Braydon, Colton, and FaytheSubject: on the run, he's at it againTo: autism-aspergers Date: Thursday, June 16, 2011, 3:28 PM

Okay,

My 3.5 year old son runs off. I posted about this before, but I need some new ideas. This week, once, up to 3 times a day he has gotten away from me. Not just 10 or 20 or even 50 feet. I'm talking about running off, going around the bend where I can't see, ignoring all requests to come back. I had to employ the help of strangers to corral him while I caught up...then today, my worst nightmare!

We were home, I was talking to my neighbor for a minute or two. He goes 10 feet away to see if the plants need water, I look up and he's GONE! We looked everywhere, couldn't find him, so I had to call the police. The groundskeeper where we lived found him 15 minutes later, thank goodness, but I was hysterical.

my question: what kind of therapist deals with this type of problem? He's newly diagnosed, so a lot of his therapy has not started yet, but who do I discuss this with? Is it OT? social skills? psychiatrist? ABA? or what?

Thanks so much for any guidance.

[Guest guest]

sounds like my son....we had to call the police as well..... My best advice is to not let him free.... put him back in a stroller, use an arm band that you use for toddlers ect. No matter what you just cant turn your back. I know its hard. Mine is my second of 4 and when he ran i had a newborn . It was a struggle but i promise it does get better. He should be sent to see a behavioral therapist! She will give several ideas. Consistency is key. Follow up on everything you say and buy an extra set of eyes!!! lolDaisy: wife to , Mom to Adayla, Braydon, Colton, and FaytheSubject: on the run, he's at it againTo: autism-aspergers Date: Thursday, June 16, 2011, 3:28 PM

Okay,

My 3.5 year old son runs off. I posted about this before, but I need some new ideas. This week, once, up to 3 times a day he has gotten away from me. Not just 10 or 20 or even 50 feet. I'm talking about running off, going around the bend where I can't see, ignoring all requests to come back. I had to employ the help of strangers to corral him while I caught up...then today, my worst nightmare!

We were home, I was talking to my neighbor for a minute or two. He goes 10 feet away to see if the plants need water, I look up and he's GONE! We looked everywhere, couldn't find him, so I had to call the police. The groundskeeper where we lived found him 15 minutes later, thank goodness, but I was hysterical.

my question: what kind of therapist deals with this type of problem? He's newly diagnosed, so a lot of his therapy has not started yet, but who do I discuss this with? Is it OT? social skills? psychiatrist? ABA? or what?

Thanks so much for any guidance.

[Guest guest]

Hi Matt, I think what you and I are talking about is training the child.

Give a command and expect the child to follow it. Be specific about what

you want and make your instruction clear. Do NOT run away. Go over it a

few times and if you see a resistance to compliance to your authority

follow up with something. Could be a sterner voice, a squeeze or pinch

on the arm, a jerk in the direction you are communicating to the child

you want him to go.

People get all carried away about this but really the fact of the matter

is we are TRAINING our children to obey us and the ultimate goal is when

they follow our voice commands because they respect our authority.

Carolyn

> What kind of punishment are you using? If you are not using something

> that is harsh enough to make him understand that this is not a game to

> you, then he will never have a reason to stop. I personally advocate

> spanking, others advocate time outs, but you have to use something and

> use it consistently - and it has to be strong and harsh enough to get

> him out of the mindset that he is playing a game with you.

>

> Remember, you are the parent. You can still be his friend, and his

> playmate, but you have to also be the parent and make the rules... and

> enforce punishments if he disobeys them... yes, even at 3.5.

>

> With my oldest one, we had decided to not use spanking as a

> discipline, until we lost so much control that she thought we were

> just playing a game. She looked at it like disobeying the rules was a

> way to get positive attention from us, to do things that caused us to

> make lots of noise and hold her for a while. She would even laugh

> while we were trying to catch her, and cry when we did catch her

> because the game was over. Until she tried to jump out of a window

> (before seat belts) while the car was moving. Faced with death, or

> doing something we didn't want to have to do, we chose to let her live

> and to deal with our own guilt ourselves.

>

> She realized that day that what she was doing was a game to her, but

> not to us. She tried to jump out of the car five more times that

> afternoon. At the end of the day we were in tears, the kid was sullen

> and angry, but she stopped. She never tried it again, and went back to

> her bubbly happy self in a few hours.

>

> Me and my wife sat and talked about the experience afterward, and

> realized that if we were going to use this (and others) form of

> punishment, it had to be that " This is wrong, ALWAYS! " In other words,

> we cannot allow the behavior in one circumstance, and not allow it in

> another. It has to be black and white to the little'un so that the

> kids know it is wrong, or right, always.

>

> That is what worked for me -* and my personal experience*. I would ask

> everyone to respect my opinion, the wisdom that I have acquired over a

> lifetime through three children who are all happy healthy adults now,

> and not flame me, accuse me, or call me names. This si not advice,

> just an example of my life, an experience I had, and what I did about it.

>

>

>

>> Okay,

>>

>> My 3.5 year old son runs off. I posted about this before, but I need some

new ideas. This week, once, up to 3 times a day he has gotten away from me.

Not just 10 or 20 or even 50 feet. I'm talking about running off, going around

the bend where I can't see, ignoring all requests to come back. I had to employ

the help of strangers to corral him while I caught up...then today, my worst

nightmare!

>>

>> We were home, I was talking to my neighbor for a minute or two. He goes 10

feet away to see if the plants need water, I look up and he's GONE! We looked

everywhere, couldn't find him, so I had to call the police. The groundskeeper

where we lived found him 15 minutes later, thank goodness, but I was hysterical.

>>

>> my question: what kind of therapist deals with this type of problem? He's

newly diagnosed, so a lot of his therapy has not started yet, but who do I

discuss this with? Is it OT? social skills? psychiatrist? ABA? or what?

>>

>> Thanks so much for any guidance.

>>

>

>

[Guest guest]

Thanks for that. I sent the message so that I could get some ideas from people

who have been through this before. Let's not call out parenting styles, as

someone devoted an entire thread to recently, and the moderator underscored.

Obviously, a lot of our kiddos have issues that don't respond to the usual

parenting tricks. He doesn't do it to be mean, he honestly doesn't understand

that what he did was wrong.

Just because we don't know each other, doesn't mean we can't be civil. =)

Also, thanks to everyone for all the great ideas.

> >

> > Okay,

> >

> > My 3.5 year old son runs off. I posted about this before, but I need

> > some new ideas. This week, once, up to 3 times a day he has gotten

> > away from me. Not just 10 or 20 or even 50 feet. I'm talking about

> > running off, going around the bend where I can't see, ignoring all

> > requests to come back. I had to employ the help of strangers to corral

> > him while I caught up...then today, my worst nightmare!

> >

> > We were home, I was talking to my neighbor for a minute or two. He

> > goes 10 feet away to see if the plants need water, I look up and he's

> > GONE! We looked everywhere, couldn't find him, so I had to call the

> > police. The groundskeeper where we lived found him 15 minutes later,

> > thank goodness, but I was hysterical.

> >

> > my question: what kind of therapist deals with this type of problem?

> > He's newly diagnosed, so a lot of his therapy has not started yet, but

> > who do I discuss this with? Is it OT? social skills? psychiatrist?

> > ABA? or what?

> >

> > Thanks so much for any guidance.

> >

> >

>

>

> ------------------------------------

>

>

[Guest guest]

Thanks for that. I sent the message so that I could get some ideas from people

who have been through this before. Let's not call out parenting styles, as

someone devoted an entire thread to recently, and the moderator underscored.

Obviously, a lot of our kiddos have issues that don't respond to the usual

parenting tricks. He doesn't do it to be mean, he honestly doesn't understand

that what he did was wrong.

Just because we don't know each other, doesn't mean we can't be civil. =)

Also, thanks to everyone for all the great ideas.

> >

> > Okay,

> >

> > My 3.5 year old son runs off. I posted about this before, but I need

> > some new ideas. This week, once, up to 3 times a day he has gotten

> > away from me. Not just 10 or 20 or even 50 feet. I'm talking about

> > running off, going around the bend where I can't see, ignoring all

> > requests to come back. I had to employ the help of strangers to corral

> > him while I caught up...then today, my worst nightmare!

> >

> > We were home, I was talking to my neighbor for a minute or two. He

> > goes 10 feet away to see if the plants need water, I look up and he's

> > GONE! We looked everywhere, couldn't find him, so I had to call the

> > police. The groundskeeper where we lived found him 15 minutes later,

> > thank goodness, but I was hysterical.

> >

> > my question: what kind of therapist deals with this type of problem?

> > He's newly diagnosed, so a lot of his therapy has not started yet, but

> > who do I discuss this with? Is it OT? social skills? psychiatrist?

> > ABA? or what?

> >

> > Thanks so much for any guidance.

> >

> >

>

>

> ------------------------------------

>

>

[Guest guest]

karjina,

I am so sorry you are going thru this. Our child was never an " eloper " as many

like to say. I honestly think its because we used his puppy backpack on him for

so long. I got it at Walmart and its tail had a loop on it that I could put on

my wrist. My kiddo went thru a phase where he didn't like his hand held. This

was over a year before diagnosis. We didn't know he was having sensory issues.

We are lucky now in he never runs away and will hold our hand willingly. As I

said we never addressed this thru therapy, but we have used ABA techniques in

other areas.

You may want to consider using a backpack while your addressing the problem for

safety sake.

When our son is hyperfocused on something his hearing is unreliable. It is

possible when your kiddo follows his impulse and runs away from you that he is

no longer tuned into your voice. We did have to use ABA to get our son to

respond to his name in very stimulating areas. It was worth it. Whenever he

starts to get hyperfocused, or loose all focus we can get him back fast.

Amy

> > >

> > > Okay,

> > >

> > > My 3.5 year old son runs off. I posted about this before, but I need

> > > some new ideas. This week, once, up to 3 times a day he has gotten

> > > away from me. Not just 10 or 20 or even 50 feet. I'm talking about

> > > running off, going around the bend where I can't see, ignoring all

> > > requests to come back. I had to employ the help of strangers to corral

> > > him while I caught up...then today, my worst nightmare!

> > >

> > > We were home, I was talking to my neighbor for a minute or two. He

> > > goes 10 feet away to see if the plants need water, I look up and he's

> > > GONE! We looked everywhere, couldn't find him, so I had to call the

> > > police. The groundskeeper where we lived found him 15 minutes later,

> > > thank goodness, but I was hysterical.

> > >

> > > my question: what kind of therapist deals with this type of problem?

> > > He's newly diagnosed, so a lot of his therapy has not started yet, but

> > > who do I discuss this with? Is it OT? social skills? psychiatrist?

> > > ABA? or what?

> > >

> > > Thanks so much for any guidance.

> > >

> > >

> >

> >

> > ------------------------------------

> >

> >

[Guest guest]

karjina,

I am so sorry you are going thru this. Our child was never an " eloper " as many

like to say. I honestly think its because we used his puppy backpack on him for

so long. I got it at Walmart and its tail had a loop on it that I could put on

my wrist. My kiddo went thru a phase where he didn't like his hand held. This

was over a year before diagnosis. We didn't know he was having sensory issues.

We are lucky now in he never runs away and will hold our hand willingly. As I

said we never addressed this thru therapy, but we have used ABA techniques in

other areas.

You may want to consider using a backpack while your addressing the problem for

safety sake.

When our son is hyperfocused on something his hearing is unreliable. It is

possible when your kiddo follows his impulse and runs away from you that he is

no longer tuned into your voice. We did have to use ABA to get our son to

respond to his name in very stimulating areas. It was worth it. Whenever he

starts to get hyperfocused, or loose all focus we can get him back fast.

Amy

> > >

> > > Okay,

> > >

> > > My 3.5 year old son runs off. I posted about this before, but I need

> > > some new ideas. This week, once, up to 3 times a day he has gotten

> > > away from me. Not just 10 or 20 or even 50 feet. I'm talking about

> > > running off, going around the bend where I can't see, ignoring all

> > > requests to come back. I had to employ the help of strangers to corral

> > > him while I caught up...then today, my worst nightmare!

> > >

> > > We were home, I was talking to my neighbor for a minute or two. He

> > > goes 10 feet away to see if the plants need water, I look up and he's

> > > GONE! We looked everywhere, couldn't find him, so I had to call the

> > > police. The groundskeeper where we lived found him 15 minutes later,

> > > thank goodness, but I was hysterical.

> > >

> > > my question: what kind of therapist deals with this type of problem?

> > > He's newly diagnosed, so a lot of his therapy has not started yet, but

> > > who do I discuss this with? Is it OT? social skills? psychiatrist?

> > > ABA? or what?

> > >

> > > Thanks so much for any guidance.

> > >

> > >

> >

> >

> > ------------------------------------

> >

> >

[Guest guest]

karjina,

I am so sorry you are going thru this. Our child was never an " eloper " as many

like to say. I honestly think its because we used his puppy backpack on him for

so long. I got it at Walmart and its tail had a loop on it that I could put on

my wrist. My kiddo went thru a phase where he didn't like his hand held. This

was over a year before diagnosis. We didn't know he was having sensory issues.

We are lucky now in he never runs away and will hold our hand willingly. As I

said we never addressed this thru therapy, but we have used ABA techniques in

other areas.

You may want to consider using a backpack while your addressing the problem for

safety sake.

When our son is hyperfocused on something his hearing is unreliable. It is

possible when your kiddo follows his impulse and runs away from you that he is

no longer tuned into your voice. We did have to use ABA to get our son to

respond to his name in very stimulating areas. It was worth it. Whenever he

starts to get hyperfocused, or loose all focus we can get him back fast.

Amy

> > >

> > > Okay,

> > >

> > > My 3.5 year old son runs off. I posted about this before, but I need

> > > some new ideas. This week, once, up to 3 times a day he has gotten

> > > away from me. Not just 10 or 20 or even 50 feet. I'm talking about

> > > running off, going around the bend where I can't see, ignoring all

> > > requests to come back. I had to employ the help of strangers to corral

> > > him while I caught up...then today, my worst nightmare!

> > >

> > > We were home, I was talking to my neighbor for a minute or two. He

> > > goes 10 feet away to see if the plants need water, I look up and he's

> > > GONE! We looked everywhere, couldn't find him, so I had to call the

> > > police. The groundskeeper where we lived found him 15 minutes later,

> > > thank goodness, but I was hysterical.

> > >

> > > my question: what kind of therapist deals with this type of problem?

> > > He's newly diagnosed, so a lot of his therapy has not started yet, but

> > > who do I discuss this with? Is it OT? social skills? psychiatrist?

> > > ABA? or what?

> > >

> > > Thanks so much for any guidance.

> > >

> > >

> >

> >

> > ------------------------------------

> >

> >

[Guest guest]

My son is almost nine and still doesn't like his hand held. He wants you to grab his arm right above the wrist.

To: autism-aspergers Sent: Thu, June 16, 2011 9:08:27 PMSubject: Re: on the run, he's at it again

karjina,I am so sorry you are going thru this. Our child was never an "eloper" as many like to say. I honestly think its because we used his puppy backpack on him for so long. I got it at Walmart and its tail had a loop on it that I could put on my wrist. My kiddo went thru a phase where he didn't like his hand held. This was over a year before diagnosis. We didn't know he was having sensory issues.We are lucky now in he never runs away and will hold our hand willingly. As I said we never addressed this thru therapy, but we have used ABA techniques in other areas.You may want to consider using a backpack while your addressing the problem for safety sake. When our son is hyperfocused on something his hearing is unreliable. It is possible when your kiddo follows his impulse and runs away from you that he is no longer tuned into your voice. We did have to use ABA to get our son to respond to his name in very stimulating

areas. It was worth it. Whenever he starts to get hyperfocused, or loose all focus we can get him back fast.Amy> > >> > > Okay,> > >> > > My 3.5 year old son runs off. I posted about this before, but I need > > > some new ideas. This week, once, up to

3 times a day he has gotten > > > away from me. Not just 10 or 20 or even 50 feet. I'm talking about > > > running off, going around the bend where I can't see, ignoring all > > > requests to come back. I had to employ the help of strangers to corral > > > him while I caught up...then today, my worst nightmare!> > >> > > We were home, I was talking to my neighbor for a minute or two. He > > > goes 10 feet away to see if the plants need water, I look up and he's > > > GONE! We looked everywhere, couldn't find him, so I had to call the > > > police. The groundskeeper where we lived found him 15 minutes later, > > > thank goodness, but I was hysterical.> > >> > > my question: what kind of therapist deals with this type of problem? > > > He's newly diagnosed, so a lot of his therapy has not

started yet, but > > > who do I discuss this with? Is it OT? social skills? psychiatrist? > > > ABA? or what?> > >> > > Thanks so much for any guidance.> > >> > > > > > > > > ------------------------------------> > > >

[Guest guest]

My son is almost nine and still doesn't like his hand held. He wants you to grab his arm right above the wrist.

To: autism-aspergers Sent: Thu, June 16, 2011 9:08:27 PMSubject: Re: on the run, he's at it again

karjina,I am so sorry you are going thru this. Our child was never an "eloper" as many like to say. I honestly think its because we used his puppy backpack on him for so long. I got it at Walmart and its tail had a loop on it that I could put on my wrist. My kiddo went thru a phase where he didn't like his hand held. This was over a year before diagnosis. We didn't know he was having sensory issues.We are lucky now in he never runs away and will hold our hand willingly. As I said we never addressed this thru therapy, but we have used ABA techniques in other areas.You may want to consider using a backpack while your addressing the problem for safety sake. When our son is hyperfocused on something his hearing is unreliable. It is possible when your kiddo follows his impulse and runs away from you that he is no longer tuned into your voice. We did have to use ABA to get our son to respond to his name in very stimulating

areas. It was worth it. Whenever he starts to get hyperfocused, or loose all focus we can get him back fast.Amy> > >> > > Okay,> > >> > > My 3.5 year old son runs off. I posted about this before, but I need > > > some new ideas. This week, once, up to

3 times a day he has gotten > > > away from me. Not just 10 or 20 or even 50 feet. I'm talking about > > > running off, going around the bend where I can't see, ignoring all > > > requests to come back. I had to employ the help of strangers to corral > > > him while I caught up...then today, my worst nightmare!> > >> > > We were home, I was talking to my neighbor for a minute or two. He > > > goes 10 feet away to see if the plants need water, I look up and he's > > > GONE! We looked everywhere, couldn't find him, so I had to call the > > > police. The groundskeeper where we lived found him 15 minutes later, > > > thank goodness, but I was hysterical.> > >> > > my question: what kind of therapist deals with this type of problem? > > > He's newly diagnosed, so a lot of his therapy has not

started yet, but > > > who do I discuss this with? Is it OT? social skills? psychiatrist? > > > ABA? or what?> > >> > > Thanks so much for any guidance.> > >> > > > > > > > > ------------------------------------> > > >

[Guest guest]

Hello.

I don't think I've actually posted anything here but I've been reading as I'm

able.

I have a 13 year old who is a flight risk. I think the first time he took off

was when he was about 4. We have tried a lot of different things. Reminding him

that " run away " is a bad choice helps. (By the way, he got the idea of running

away from the Teletubbies. Thank you, PBS.)

What I want to let you know is that he hasn't gone off on his own in almost 2

years. We have not let our guard down. The doors are still alarmed and we can't

open our windows more than an inch but he hasn't even tried it.

It does get better! Hang in there!

Therese

[Guest guest]

Hello.

I don't think I've actually posted anything here but I've been reading as I'm

able.

I have a 13 year old who is a flight risk. I think the first time he took off

was when he was about 4. We have tried a lot of different things. Reminding him

that " run away " is a bad choice helps. (By the way, he got the idea of running

away from the Teletubbies. Thank you, PBS.)

What I want to let you know is that he hasn't gone off on his own in almost 2

years. We have not let our guard down. The doors are still alarmed and we can't

open our windows more than an inch but he hasn't even tried it.

It does get better! Hang in there!

Therese

[Guest guest]

Hello.

I don't think I've actually posted anything here but I've been reading as I'm

able.

I have a 13 year old who is a flight risk. I think the first time he took off

was when he was about 4. We have tried a lot of different things. Reminding him

that " run away " is a bad choice helps. (By the way, he got the idea of running

away from the Teletubbies. Thank you, PBS.)

What I want to let you know is that he hasn't gone off on his own in almost 2

years. We have not let our guard down. The doors are still alarmed and we can't

open our windows more than an inch but he hasn't even tried it.

It does get better! Hang in there!

Therese

[Guest guest]

Hmm, guess I am being a bit too direct again, sorry, but I am noticing a

trend here to kind of accept a child as being " different " and not being

firm with him, and not insisting he can learn the usual way all children

do. I must admit it is a balancing act and each one of us mothers and

grandmothers have to find what works for us, but I would caution on

being too permissive with the child also. I have raised three sons and a

daughter and the autistic one was difficult but I stuck to the same

standards teaching him as I did the others, must admit they were all

very unique and balance was needed.

I am feeling my way on this also, my little grandson Lucas was just now

here with his brother and between the two of them I am now spent! It is

hard to tell what is going on in each one of them, one " normal " and one

not, it is hard to see where autism begins and where it is just plain

little boy stuff too.

That is what I am talking about, I simply don't think we should blame

everything on autism like the child has an " out " to plain old discipline

either.

With Lucas just now he just kept asking me if water was in the swimming

pool which I said no it isn't and even if it was it is too cold to swim,

he asked me about a hundred times. Also he kept telling me to quit

talking and telling me I am not listening to him. Got really exasperated

with me and can be very dramatic. I got a little tired of me telling me

to stop talking because that is exactly what I wanted him to do. So I

switched rolls on him and I became him and told him he was a the

grandma. And then I kept saying is the pool filled yet, is the pool

filled yet, is the pool filled yet, is the pool filled yet, stop

talking, stop talking, is the pool filled yet.

Then I asked him how it felt to be me while I was being him. He didn't

say much but I think he is thinking about it.

His brother has traits that drive me up a wall also. When I told their

mom when she finally got here she said, " Get the stick, hold it in your

lap. " I haven't resorted much to that yet with them, but for summer I

may have to crack down as I think they will be here an awful lot and I

am not going to let them rule me. It is too much!

My daughter brought me a white t-shirt with a really pretty blue Mustang

on it with the words, " Old School " I kind of liked that...

Onward!

Carolyn ;o)

R. Tucker wrote:

> YOU ARE NOT THE PROBLEM!! You just need help and tools to come up with

> a solution. You aren't wonder woman! I would keep him confined as much

> as possible until you figure out how to get the upper hand in the

> situation! Good luck!

>

>

>

> ------------------------------------------------------------------------

> *From:* Carolyn

> *To:* autism-aspergers

> *Sent:* Thu, June 16, 2011 6:11:58 PM

> *Subject:* Re: on the run, he's at it again

>

> Hello again, was cut off when I responded to , but re-read your

> post below and it sounds like you are not giving your a child a voice

> command and then seeing to it that he obeys you! You are not following

> through. Start by saying his name, and; " Do NOT run away! " When he

> starts to run away anyway, grab his hand and say, " No! do not run away! "

> You have to follow through with what you are saying by forcing him to

> obey your voice command. Do this over and over as many times as he needs

> in order to " get it. "

>

> If he is a strong willed child he will no doubt challenge you, so you

> will have to get stronger in meaning it. How bad to you want him to

> learn to obey you and be an obedient child?

>

> He is not the problem you are the problem for not training him to obey

> you and to respect your authority.

>

> It does not matter of if he has autism he still has to be trained, and

> all the more so because he is going to have a harder time functioning in

> a world where the other kids already know this stuff. He will not be

> excused from obeying authority because he has autism.

>

> Also if he was only recently diagnosed what have you been using to train

> him? By 3 1/2 he should be doing really well obeying you by now...

>

> Carolyn

>

>

> karjina wrote:

> >

> > Okay,

> >

> > My 3.5 year old son runs off. I posted about this before, but I need

> > some new ideas. This week, once, up to 3 times a day he has gotten

> > away from me. Not just 10 or 20 or even 50 feet. I'm talking about

> > running off, going around the bend where I can't see, ignoring all

> > requests to come back. I had to employ the help of strangers to corral

> > him while I caught up...then today, my worst nightmare!

> >

> > We were home, I was talking to my neighbor for a minute or two. He

> > goes 10 feet away to see if the plants need water, I look up and he's

> > GONE! We looked everywhere, couldn't find him, so I had to call the

> > police. The groundskeeper where we lived found him 15 minutes later,

> > thank goodness, but I was hysterical.

> >

> > my question: what kind of therapist deals with this type of problem?

> > He's newly diagnosed, so a lot of his therapy has not started yet, but

> > who do I discuss this with? Is it OT? social skills? psychiatrist?

> > ABA? or what?

> >

> > Thanks so much for any guidance.

> >

> >

>

>

> ------------------------------------

>

>

[Guest guest]

Hmm, guess I am being a bit too direct again, sorry, but I am noticing a

trend here to kind of accept a child as being " different " and not being

firm with him, and not insisting he can learn the usual way all children

do. I must admit it is a balancing act and each one of us mothers and

grandmothers have to find what works for us, but I would caution on

being too permissive with the child also. I have raised three sons and a

daughter and the autistic one was difficult but I stuck to the same

standards teaching him as I did the others, must admit they were all

very unique and balance was needed.

I am feeling my way on this also, my little grandson Lucas was just now

here with his brother and between the two of them I am now spent! It is

hard to tell what is going on in each one of them, one " normal " and one

not, it is hard to see where autism begins and where it is just plain

little boy stuff too.

That is what I am talking about, I simply don't think we should blame

everything on autism like the child has an " out " to plain old discipline

either.

With Lucas just now he just kept asking me if water was in the swimming

pool which I said no it isn't and even if it was it is too cold to swim,

he asked me about a hundred times. Also he kept telling me to quit

talking and telling me I am not listening to him. Got really exasperated

with me and can be very dramatic. I got a little tired of me telling me

to stop talking because that is exactly what I wanted him to do. So I

switched rolls on him and I became him and told him he was a the

grandma. And then I kept saying is the pool filled yet, is the pool

filled yet, is the pool filled yet, is the pool filled yet, stop

talking, stop talking, is the pool filled yet.

Then I asked him how it felt to be me while I was being him. He didn't

say much but I think he is thinking about it.

His brother has traits that drive me up a wall also. When I told their

mom when she finally got here she said, " Get the stick, hold it in your

lap. " I haven't resorted much to that yet with them, but for summer I

may have to crack down as I think they will be here an awful lot and I

am not going to let them rule me. It is too much!

My daughter brought me a white t-shirt with a really pretty blue Mustang

on it with the words, " Old School " I kind of liked that...

Onward!

Carolyn ;o)

R. Tucker wrote:

> YOU ARE NOT THE PROBLEM!! You just need help and tools to come up with

> a solution. You aren't wonder woman! I would keep him confined as much

> as possible until you figure out how to get the upper hand in the

> situation! Good luck!

>

>

>

> ------------------------------------------------------------------------

> *From:* Carolyn

> *To:* autism-aspergers

> *Sent:* Thu, June 16, 2011 6:11:58 PM

> *Subject:* Re: on the run, he's at it again

>

> Hello again, was cut off when I responded to , but re-read your

> post below and it sounds like you are not giving your a child a voice

> command and then seeing to it that he obeys you! You are not following

> through. Start by saying his name, and; " Do NOT run away! " When he

> starts to run away anyway, grab his hand and say, " No! do not run away! "

> You have to follow through with what you are saying by forcing him to

> obey your voice command. Do this over and over as many times as he needs

> in order to " get it. "

>

> If he is a strong willed child he will no doubt challenge you, so you

> will have to get stronger in meaning it. How bad to you want him to

> learn to obey you and be an obedient child?

>

> He is not the problem you are the problem for not training him to obey

> you and to respect your authority.

>

> It does not matter of if he has autism he still has to be trained, and

> all the more so because he is going to have a harder time functioning in

> a world where the other kids already know this stuff. He will not be

> excused from obeying authority because he has autism.

>

> Also if he was only recently diagnosed what have you been using to train

> him? By 3 1/2 he should be doing really well obeying you by now...

>

> Carolyn

>

>

> karjina wrote:

> >

> > Okay,

> >

> > My 3.5 year old son runs off. I posted about this before, but I need

> > some new ideas. This week, once, up to 3 times a day he has gotten

> > away from me. Not just 10 or 20 or even 50 feet. I'm talking about

> > running off, going around the bend where I can't see, ignoring all

> > requests to come back. I had to employ the help of strangers to corral

> > him while I caught up...then today, my worst nightmare!

> >

> > We were home, I was talking to my neighbor for a minute or two. He

> > goes 10 feet away to see if the plants need water, I look up and he's

> > GONE! We looked everywhere, couldn't find him, so I had to call the

> > police. The groundskeeper where we lived found him 15 minutes later,

> > thank goodness, but I was hysterical.

> >

> > my question: what kind of therapist deals with this type of problem?

> > He's newly diagnosed, so a lot of his therapy has not started yet, but

> > who do I discuss this with? Is it OT? social skills? psychiatrist?

> > ABA? or what?

> >

> > Thanks so much for any guidance.

> >

> >

>

>

> ------------------------------------

>

>

[Guest guest]

Hmm, guess I am being a bit too direct again, sorry, but I am noticing a

trend here to kind of accept a child as being " different " and not being

firm with him, and not insisting he can learn the usual way all children

do. I must admit it is a balancing act and each one of us mothers and

grandmothers have to find what works for us, but I would caution on

being too permissive with the child also. I have raised three sons and a

daughter and the autistic one was difficult but I stuck to the same

standards teaching him as I did the others, must admit they were all

very unique and balance was needed.

I am feeling my way on this also, my little grandson Lucas was just now

here with his brother and between the two of them I am now spent! It is

hard to tell what is going on in each one of them, one " normal " and one

not, it is hard to see where autism begins and where it is just plain

little boy stuff too.

That is what I am talking about, I simply don't think we should blame

everything on autism like the child has an " out " to plain old discipline

either.

With Lucas just now he just kept asking me if water was in the swimming

pool which I said no it isn't and even if it was it is too cold to swim,

he asked me about a hundred times. Also he kept telling me to quit

talking and telling me I am not listening to him. Got really exasperated

with me and can be very dramatic. I got a little tired of me telling me

to stop talking because that is exactly what I wanted him to do. So I

switched rolls on him and I became him and told him he was a the

grandma. And then I kept saying is the pool filled yet, is the pool

filled yet, is the pool filled yet, is the pool filled yet, stop

talking, stop talking, is the pool filled yet.

Then I asked him how it felt to be me while I was being him. He didn't

say much but I think he is thinking about it.

His brother has traits that drive me up a wall also. When I told their

mom when she finally got here she said, " Get the stick, hold it in your

lap. " I haven't resorted much to that yet with them, but for summer I

may have to crack down as I think they will be here an awful lot and I

am not going to let them rule me. It is too much!

My daughter brought me a white t-shirt with a really pretty blue Mustang

on it with the words, " Old School " I kind of liked that...

Onward!

Carolyn ;o)

R. Tucker wrote:

> YOU ARE NOT THE PROBLEM!! You just need help and tools to come up with

> a solution. You aren't wonder woman! I would keep him confined as much

> as possible until you figure out how to get the upper hand in the

> situation! Good luck!

>

>

>

> ------------------------------------------------------------------------

> *From:* Carolyn

> *To:* autism-aspergers

> *Sent:* Thu, June 16, 2011 6:11:58 PM

> *Subject:* Re: on the run, he's at it again

>

> Hello again, was cut off when I responded to , but re-read your

> post below and it sounds like you are not giving your a child a voice

> command and then seeing to it that he obeys you! You are not following

> through. Start by saying his name, and; " Do NOT run away! " When he

> starts to run away anyway, grab his hand and say, " No! do not run away! "

> You have to follow through with what you are saying by forcing him to

> obey your voice command. Do this over and over as many times as he needs

> in order to " get it. "

>

> If he is a strong willed child he will no doubt challenge you, so you

> will have to get stronger in meaning it. How bad to you want him to

> learn to obey you and be an obedient child?

>

> He is not the problem you are the problem for not training him to obey

> you and to respect your authority.

>

> It does not matter of if he has autism he still has to be trained, and

> all the more so because he is going to have a harder time functioning in

> a world where the other kids already know this stuff. He will not be

> excused from obeying authority because he has autism.

>

> Also if he was only recently diagnosed what have you been using to train

> him? By 3 1/2 he should be doing really well obeying you by now...

>

> Carolyn

>

>

> karjina wrote:

> >

> > Okay,

> >

> > My 3.5 year old son runs off. I posted about this before, but I need

> > some new ideas. This week, once, up to 3 times a day he has gotten

> > away from me. Not just 10 or 20 or even 50 feet. I'm talking about

> > running off, going around the bend where I can't see, ignoring all

> > requests to come back. I had to employ the help of strangers to corral

> > him while I caught up...then today, my worst nightmare!

> >

> > We were home, I was talking to my neighbor for a minute or two. He

> > goes 10 feet away to see if the plants need water, I look up and he's

> > GONE! We looked everywhere, couldn't find him, so I had to call the

> > police. The groundskeeper where we lived found him 15 minutes later,

> > thank goodness, but I was hysterical.

> >

> > my question: what kind of therapist deals with this type of problem?

> > He's newly diagnosed, so a lot of his therapy has not started yet, but

> > who do I discuss this with? Is it OT? social skills? psychiatrist?

> > ABA? or what?

> >

> > Thanks so much for any guidance.

> >

> >

>

>

> ------------------------------------

>

>

[Guest guest]

I agree with you Carolyn.they take longer to pick things up but persistence is key.

Hmm, guess I am being a bit too direct again, sorry, but I am noticing a

trend here to kind of accept a child as being " different " and not being

firm with him, and not insisting he can learn the usual way all children

do. I must admit it is a balancing act and each one of us mothers and

grandmothers have to find what works for us, but I would caution on

being too permissive with the child also. I have raised three sons and a

daughter and the autistic one was difficult but I stuck to the same

standards teaching him as I did the others, must admit they were all

very unique and balance was needed.

I am feeling my way on this also, my little grandson Lucas was just now

here with his brother and between the two of them I am now spent! It is

hard to tell what is going on in each one of them, one " normal " and one

not, it is hard to see where autism begins and where it is just plain

little boy stuff too.

That is what I am talking about, I simply don't think we should blame

everything on autism like the child has an " out " to plain old discipline

either.

With Lucas just now he just kept asking me if water was in the swimming

pool which I said no it isn't and even if it was it is too cold to swim,

he asked me about a hundred times. Also he kept telling me to quit

talking and telling me I am not listening to him. Got really exasperated

with me and can be very dramatic. I got a little tired of me telling me

to stop talking because that is exactly what I wanted him to do. So I

switched rolls on him and I became him and told him he was a the

grandma. And then I kept saying is the pool filled yet, is the pool

filled yet, is the pool filled yet, is the pool filled yet, stop

talking, stop talking, is the pool filled yet.

Then I asked him how it felt to be me while I was being him. He didn't

say much but I think he is thinking about it.

His brother has traits that drive me up a wall also. When I told their

mom when she finally got here she said, " Get the stick, hold it in your

lap. " I haven't resorted much to that yet with them, but for summer I

may have to crack down as I think they will be here an awful lot and I

am not going to let them rule me. It is too much!

My daughter brought me a white t-shirt with a really pretty blue Mustang

on it with the words, " Old School " I kind of liked that...

Onward!

Carolyn ;o)

R. Tucker wrote:

> YOU ARE NOT THE PROBLEM!! You just need help and tools to come up with

> a solution. You aren't wonder woman! I would keep him confined as much

> as possible until you figure out how to get the upper hand in the

> situation! Good luck!

>

>

>

> ------------------------------------------------------------------------

> *From:* Carolyn

> *To:* autism-aspergers

> *Sent:* Thu, June 16, 2011 6:11:58 PM

> *Subject:* Re: on the run, he's at it again

>

> Hello again, was cut off when I responded to , but re-read your

> post below and it sounds like you are not giving your a child a voice

> command and then seeing to it that he obeys you! You are not following

> through. Start by saying his name, and; " Do NOT run away! " When he

> starts to run away anyway, grab his hand and say, " No! do not run away! "

> You have to follow through with what you are saying by forcing him to

> obey your voice command. Do this over and over as many times as he needs

> in order to " get it. "

>

> If he is a strong willed child he will no doubt challenge you, so you

> will have to get stronger in meaning it. How bad to you want him to

> learn to obey you and be an obedient child?

>

> He is not the problem you are the problem for not training him to obey

> you and to respect your authority.

>

> It does not matter of if he has autism he still has to be trained, and

> all the more so because he is going to have a harder time functioning in

> a world where the other kids already know this stuff. He will not be

> excused from obeying authority because he has autism.

>

> Also if he was only recently diagnosed what have you been using to train

> him? By 3 1/2 he should be doing really well obeying you by now...

>

> Carolyn

>

>

> karjina wrote:

> >

> > Okay,

> >

> > My 3.5 year old son runs off. I posted about this before, but I need

> > some new ideas. This week, once, up to 3 times a day he has gotten

> > away from me. Not just 10 or 20 or even 50 feet. I'm talking about

> > running off, going around the bend where I can't see, ignoring all

> > requests to come back. I had to employ the help of strangers to corral

> > him while I caught up...then today, my worst nightmare!

> >

> > We were home, I was talking to my neighbor for a minute or two. He

> > goes 10 feet away to see if the plants need water, I look up and he's

> > GONE! We looked everywhere, couldn't find him, so I had to call the

> > police. The groundskeeper where we lived found him 15 minutes later,

> > thank goodness, but I was hysterical.

> >

> > my question: what kind of therapist deals with this type of problem?

> > He's newly diagnosed, so a lot of his therapy has not started yet, but

> > who do I discuss this with? Is it OT? social skills? psychiatrist?

> > ABA? or what?

> >

> > Thanks so much for any guidance.

> >

> >

>

>

> ------------------------------------

>

>

[Guest guest]

I agree with you Carolyn.they take longer to pick things up but persistence is key.

Hmm, guess I am being a bit too direct again, sorry, but I am noticing a

trend here to kind of accept a child as being " different " and not being

firm with him, and not insisting he can learn the usual way all children

do. I must admit it is a balancing act and each one of us mothers and

grandmothers have to find what works for us, but I would caution on

being too permissive with the child also. I have raised three sons and a

daughter and the autistic one was difficult but I stuck to the same

standards teaching him as I did the others, must admit they were all

very unique and balance was needed.

I am feeling my way on this also, my little grandson Lucas was just now

here with his brother and between the two of them I am now spent! It is

hard to tell what is going on in each one of them, one " normal " and one

not, it is hard to see where autism begins and where it is just plain

little boy stuff too.

That is what I am talking about, I simply don't think we should blame

everything on autism like the child has an " out " to plain old discipline

either.

With Lucas just now he just kept asking me if water was in the swimming

pool which I said no it isn't and even if it was it is too cold to swim,

he asked me about a hundred times. Also he kept telling me to quit

talking and telling me I am not listening to him. Got really exasperated

with me and can be very dramatic. I got a little tired of me telling me

to stop talking because that is exactly what I wanted him to do. So I

switched rolls on him and I became him and told him he was a the

grandma. And then I kept saying is the pool filled yet, is the pool

filled yet, is the pool filled yet, is the pool filled yet, stop

talking, stop talking, is the pool filled yet.

Then I asked him how it felt to be me while I was being him. He didn't

say much but I think he is thinking about it.

His brother has traits that drive me up a wall also. When I told their

mom when she finally got here she said, " Get the stick, hold it in your

lap. " I haven't resorted much to that yet with them, but for summer I

may have to crack down as I think they will be here an awful lot and I

am not going to let them rule me. It is too much!

My daughter brought me a white t-shirt with a really pretty blue Mustang

on it with the words, " Old School " I kind of liked that...

Onward!

Carolyn ;o)

R. Tucker wrote:

> YOU ARE NOT THE PROBLEM!! You just need help and tools to come up with

> a solution. You aren't wonder woman! I would keep him confined as much

> as possible until you figure out how to get the upper hand in the

> situation! Good luck!

>

>

>

> ------------------------------------------------------------------------

> *From:* Carolyn

> *To:* autism-aspergers

> *Sent:* Thu, June 16, 2011 6:11:58 PM

> *Subject:* Re: on the run, he's at it again

>

> Hello again, was cut off when I responded to , but re-read your

> post below and it sounds like you are not giving your a child a voice

> command and then seeing to it that he obeys you! You are not following

> through. Start by saying his name, and; " Do NOT run away! " When he

> starts to run away anyway, grab his hand and say, " No! do not run away! "

> You have to follow through with what you are saying by forcing him to

> obey your voice command. Do this over and over as many times as he needs

> in order to " get it. "

>

> If he is a strong willed child he will no doubt challenge you, so you

> will have to get stronger in meaning it. How bad to you want him to

> learn to obey you and be an obedient child?

>

> He is not the problem you are the problem for not training him to obey

> you and to respect your authority.

>

> It does not matter of if he has autism he still has to be trained, and

> all the more so because he is going to have a harder time functioning in

> a world where the other kids already know this stuff. He will not be

> excused from obeying authority because he has autism.

>

> Also if he was only recently diagnosed what have you been using to train

> him? By 3 1/2 he should be doing really well obeying you by now...

>

> Carolyn

>

>

> karjina wrote:

> >

> > Okay,

> >

> > My 3.5 year old son runs off. I posted about this before, but I need

> > some new ideas. This week, once, up to 3 times a day he has gotten

> > away from me. Not just 10 or 20 or even 50 feet. I'm talking about

> > running off, going around the bend where I can't see, ignoring all

> > requests to come back. I had to employ the help of strangers to corral

> > him while I caught up...then today, my worst nightmare!

> >

> > We were home, I was talking to my neighbor for a minute or two. He

> > goes 10 feet away to see if the plants need water, I look up and he's

> > GONE! We looked everywhere, couldn't find him, so I had to call the

> > police. The groundskeeper where we lived found him 15 minutes later,

> > thank goodness, but I was hysterical.

> >

> > my question: what kind of therapist deals with this type of problem?

> > He's newly diagnosed, so a lot of his therapy has not started yet, but

> > who do I discuss this with? Is it OT? social skills? psychiatrist?

> > ABA? or what?

> >

> > Thanks so much for any guidance.

> >

> >

>

>

> ------------------------------------

>

>

[Guest guest]

Carolyn,

Accepting that my child is different has made all the difference in the world.

Before his diagnosis he was overwhelmed and unable to learn the way other

children learn. Once he was diagnosed we as his parents learned Floortime, ABA

and Sensory Integration. By incorporating proven methods we saw great gains

quickly. Some things will always be difficult for him. Some things he can learn

traditionally, but other things he has roadblocks and skill deficits that need

to be identified, filled in and then we find success.

Acceptance doesn't equal out to being a parent not parenting. Acceptance,

research, education and implementation actually equals out to better outcomes in

the long run.

Amy

In autism-aspergers , Carolyn wrote:

>

> Hmm, guess I am being a bit too direct again, sorry, but I am noticing a

> trend here to kind of accept a child as being " different " and not being

> firm with him, and not insisting he can learn the usual way all children

> do. I must admit it is a balancing act and each one of us mothers and

> grandmothers have to find what works for us, but I would caution on

> being too permissive with the child also. I have raised three sons and a

> daughter and the autistic one was difficult but I stuck to the same

> standards teaching him as I did the others, must admit they were all

> very unique and balance was needed.

>

> I am feeling my way on this also, my little grandson Lucas was just now

> here with his brother and between the two of them I am now spent! It is

> hard to tell what is going on in each one of them, one " normal " and one

> not, it is hard to see where autism begins and where it is just plain

> little boy stuff too.

>

> That is what I am talking about, I simply don't think we should blame

> everything on autism like the child has an " out " to plain old discipline

> either.

>

> With Lucas just now he just kept asking me if water was in the swimming

> pool which I said no it isn't and even if it was it is too cold to swim,

> he asked me about a hundred times. Also he kept telling me to quit

> talking and telling me I am not listening to him. Got really exasperated

> with me and can be very dramatic. I got a little tired of me telling me

> to stop talking because that is exactly what I wanted him to do. So I

> switched rolls on him and I became him and told him he was a the

> grandma. And then I kept saying is the pool filled yet, is the pool

> filled yet, is the pool filled yet, is the pool filled yet, stop

> talking, stop talking, is the pool filled yet.

>

> Then I asked him how it felt to be me while I was being him. He didn't

> say much but I think he is thinking about it.

>

> His brother has traits that drive me up a wall also. When I told their

> mom when she finally got here she said, " Get the stick, hold it in your

> lap. " I haven't resorted much to that yet with them, but for summer I

> may have to crack down as I think they will be here an awful lot and I

> am not going to let them rule me. It is too much!

>

> My daughter brought me a white t-shirt with a really pretty blue Mustang

> on it with the words, " Old School " I kind of liked that...

>

> Onward!

>

> Carolyn ;o)

>

> R. Tucker wrote:

> > YOU ARE NOT THE PROBLEM!! You just need help and tools to come up with

> > a solution. You aren't wonder woman! I would keep him confined as much

> > as possible until you figure out how to get the upper hand in the

> > situation! Good luck!

> >

> >

> >

> > ------------------------------------------------------------------------

> > *From:* Carolyn

> > *To:* autism-aspergers

> > *Sent:* Thu, June 16, 2011 6:11:58 PM

> > *Subject:* Re: on the run, he's at it again

> >

> > Hello again, was cut off when I responded to , but re-read your

> > post below and it sounds like you are not giving your a child a voice

> > command and then seeing to it that he obeys you! You are not following

> > through. Start by saying his name, and; " Do NOT run away! " When he

> > starts to run away anyway, grab his hand and say, " No! do not run away! "

> > You have to follow through with what you are saying by forcing him to

> > obey your voice command. Do this over and over as many times as he needs

> > in order to " get it. "

> >

> > If he is a strong willed child he will no doubt challenge you, so you

> > will have to get stronger in meaning it. How bad to you want him to

> > learn to obey you and be an obedient child?

> >

> > He is not the problem you are the problem for not training him to obey

> > you and to respect your authority.

> >

> > It does not matter of if he has autism he still has to be trained, and

> > all the more so because he is going to have a harder time functioning in

> > a world where the other kids already know this stuff. He will not be

> > excused from obeying authority because he has autism.

> >

> > Also if he was only recently diagnosed what have you been using to train

> > him? By 3 1/2 he should be doing really well obeying you by now...

> >

> > Carolyn

> >

> >

> > karjina wrote:

> > >

> > > Okay,

> > >

> > > My 3.5 year old son runs off. I posted about this before, but I need

> > > some new ideas. This week, once, up to 3 times a day he has gotten

> > > away from me. Not just 10 or 20 or even 50 feet. I'm talking about

> > > running off, going around the bend where I can't see, ignoring all

> > > requests to come back. I had to employ the help of strangers to corral

> > > him while I caught up...then today, my worst nightmare!

> > >

> > > We were home, I was talking to my neighbor for a minute or two. He

> > > goes 10 feet away to see if the plants need water, I look up and he's

> > > GONE! We looked everywhere, couldn't find him, so I had to call the

> > > police. The groundskeeper where we lived found him 15 minutes later,

> > > thank goodness, but I was hysterical.

> > >

> > > my question: what kind of therapist deals with this type of problem?

> > > He's newly diagnosed, so a lot of his therapy has not started yet, but

> > > who do I discuss this with? Is it OT? social skills? psychiatrist?

> > > ABA? or what?

> > >

> > > Thanks so much for any guidance.

> > >

> > >

> >

> >

> > ------------------------------------

> >

> >

[Guest guest]

Carolyn,

Accepting that my child is different has made all the difference in the world.

Before his diagnosis he was overwhelmed and unable to learn the way other

children learn. Once he was diagnosed we as his parents learned Floortime, ABA

and Sensory Integration. By incorporating proven methods we saw great gains

quickly. Some things will always be difficult for him. Some things he can learn

traditionally, but other things he has roadblocks and skill deficits that need

to be identified, filled in and then we find success.

Acceptance doesn't equal out to being a parent not parenting. Acceptance,

research, education and implementation actually equals out to better outcomes in

the long run.

Amy

In autism-aspergers , Carolyn wrote:

>

> Hmm, guess I am being a bit too direct again, sorry, but I am noticing a

> trend here to kind of accept a child as being " different " and not being

> firm with him, and not insisting he can learn the usual way all children

> do. I must admit it is a balancing act and each one of us mothers and

> grandmothers have to find what works for us, but I would caution on

> being too permissive with the child also. I have raised three sons and a

> daughter and the autistic one was difficult but I stuck to the same

> standards teaching him as I did the others, must admit they were all

> very unique and balance was needed.

>

> I am feeling my way on this also, my little grandson Lucas was just now

> here with his brother and between the two of them I am now spent! It is

> hard to tell what is going on in each one of them, one " normal " and one

> not, it is hard to see where autism begins and where it is just plain

> little boy stuff too.

>

> That is what I am talking about, I simply don't think we should blame

> everything on autism like the child has an " out " to plain old discipline

> either.

>

> With Lucas just now he just kept asking me if water was in the swimming

> pool which I said no it isn't and even if it was it is too cold to swim,

> he asked me about a hundred times. Also he kept telling me to quit

> talking and telling me I am not listening to him. Got really exasperated

> with me and can be very dramatic. I got a little tired of me telling me

> to stop talking because that is exactly what I wanted him to do. So I

> switched rolls on him and I became him and told him he was a the

> grandma. And then I kept saying is the pool filled yet, is the pool

> filled yet, is the pool filled yet, is the pool filled yet, stop

> talking, stop talking, is the pool filled yet.

>

> Then I asked him how it felt to be me while I was being him. He didn't

> say much but I think he is thinking about it.

>

> His brother has traits that drive me up a wall also. When I told their

> mom when she finally got here she said, " Get the stick, hold it in your

> lap. " I haven't resorted much to that yet with them, but for summer I

> may have to crack down as I think they will be here an awful lot and I

> am not going to let them rule me. It is too much!

>

> My daughter brought me a white t-shirt with a really pretty blue Mustang

> on it with the words, " Old School " I kind of liked that...

>

> Onward!

>

> Carolyn ;o)

>

> R. Tucker wrote:

> > YOU ARE NOT THE PROBLEM!! You just need help and tools to come up with

> > a solution. You aren't wonder woman! I would keep him confined as much

> > as possible until you figure out how to get the upper hand in the

> > situation! Good luck!

> >

> >

> >

> > ------------------------------------------------------------------------

> > *From:* Carolyn

> > *To:* autism-aspergers

> > *Sent:* Thu, June 16, 2011 6:11:58 PM

> > *Subject:* Re: on the run, he's at it again

> >

> > Hello again, was cut off when I responded to , but re-read your

> > post below and it sounds like you are not giving your a child a voice

> > command and then seeing to it that he obeys you! You are not following

> > through. Start by saying his name, and; " Do NOT run away! " When he

> > starts to run away anyway, grab his hand and say, " No! do not run away! "

> > You have to follow through with what you are saying by forcing him to

> > obey your voice command. Do this over and over as many times as he needs

> > in order to " get it. "

> >

> > If he is a strong willed child he will no doubt challenge you, so you

> > will have to get stronger in meaning it. How bad to you want him to

> > learn to obey you and be an obedient child?

> >

> > He is not the problem you are the problem for not training him to obey

> > you and to respect your authority.

> >

> > It does not matter of if he has autism he still has to be trained, and

> > all the more so because he is going to have a harder time functioning in

> > a world where the other kids already know this stuff. He will not be

> > excused from obeying authority because he has autism.

> >

> > Also if he was only recently diagnosed what have you been using to train

> > him? By 3 1/2 he should be doing really well obeying you by now...

> >

> > Carolyn

> >

> >

> > karjina wrote:

> > >

> > > Okay,

> > >

> > > My 3.5 year old son runs off. I posted about this before, but I need

> > > some new ideas. This week, once, up to 3 times a day he has gotten

> > > away from me. Not just 10 or 20 or even 50 feet. I'm talking about

> > > running off, going around the bend where I can't see, ignoring all

> > > requests to come back. I had to employ the help of strangers to corral

> > > him while I caught up...then today, my worst nightmare!

> > >

> > > We were home, I was talking to my neighbor for a minute or two. He

> > > goes 10 feet away to see if the plants need water, I look up and he's

> > > GONE! We looked everywhere, couldn't find him, so I had to call the

> > > police. The groundskeeper where we lived found him 15 minutes later,

> > > thank goodness, but I was hysterical.

> > >

> > > my question: what kind of therapist deals with this type of problem?

> > > He's newly diagnosed, so a lot of his therapy has not started yet, but

> > > who do I discuss this with? Is it OT? social skills? psychiatrist?

> > > ABA? or what?

> > >

> > > Thanks so much for any guidance.

> > >

> > >

> >

> >

> > ------------------------------------

> >

> >

[Guest guest]

Carolyn,

Accepting that my child is different has made all the difference in the world.

Before his diagnosis he was overwhelmed and unable to learn the way other

children learn. Once he was diagnosed we as his parents learned Floortime, ABA

and Sensory Integration. By incorporating proven methods we saw great gains

quickly. Some things will always be difficult for him. Some things he can learn

traditionally, but other things he has roadblocks and skill deficits that need

to be identified, filled in and then we find success.

Acceptance doesn't equal out to being a parent not parenting. Acceptance,

research, education and implementation actually equals out to better outcomes in

the long run.

Amy

In autism-aspergers , Carolyn wrote:

>

> Hmm, guess I am being a bit too direct again, sorry, but I am noticing a

> trend here to kind of accept a child as being " different " and not being

> firm with him, and not insisting he can learn the usual way all children

> do. I must admit it is a balancing act and each one of us mothers and

> grandmothers have to find what works for us, but I would caution on

> being too permissive with the child also. I have raised three sons and a

> daughter and the autistic one was difficult but I stuck to the same

> standards teaching him as I did the others, must admit they were all

> very unique and balance was needed.

>

> I am feeling my way on this also, my little grandson Lucas was just now

> here with his brother and between the two of them I am now spent! It is

> hard to tell what is going on in each one of them, one " normal " and one

> not, it is hard to see where autism begins and where it is just plain

> little boy stuff too.

>

> That is what I am talking about, I simply don't think we should blame

> everything on autism like the child has an " out " to plain old discipline

> either.

>

> With Lucas just now he just kept asking me if water was in the swimming

> pool which I said no it isn't and even if it was it is too cold to swim,

> he asked me about a hundred times. Also he kept telling me to quit

> talking and telling me I am not listening to him. Got really exasperated

> with me and can be very dramatic. I got a little tired of me telling me

> to stop talking because that is exactly what I wanted him to do. So I

> switched rolls on him and I became him and told him he was a the

> grandma. And then I kept saying is the pool filled yet, is the pool

> filled yet, is the pool filled yet, is the pool filled yet, stop

> talking, stop talking, is the pool filled yet.

>

> Then I asked him how it felt to be me while I was being him. He didn't

> say much but I think he is thinking about it.

>

> His brother has traits that drive me up a wall also. When I told their

> mom when she finally got here she said, " Get the stick, hold it in your

> lap. " I haven't resorted much to that yet with them, but for summer I

> may have to crack down as I think they will be here an awful lot and I

> am not going to let them rule me. It is too much!

>

> My daughter brought me a white t-shirt with a really pretty blue Mustang

> on it with the words, " Old School " I kind of liked that...

>

> Onward!

>

> Carolyn ;o)

>

> R. Tucker wrote:

> > YOU ARE NOT THE PROBLEM!! You just need help and tools to come up with

> > a solution. You aren't wonder woman! I would keep him confined as much

> > as possible until you figure out how to get the upper hand in the

> > situation! Good luck!

> >

> >

> >

> > ------------------------------------------------------------------------

> > *From:* Carolyn

> > *To:* autism-aspergers

> > *Sent:* Thu, June 16, 2011 6:11:58 PM

> > *Subject:* Re: on the run, he's at it again

> >

> > Hello again, was cut off when I responded to , but re-read your

> > post below and it sounds like you are not giving your a child a voice

> > command and then seeing to it that he obeys you! You are not following

> > through. Start by saying his name, and; " Do NOT run away! " When he

> > starts to run away anyway, grab his hand and say, " No! do not run away! "

> > You have to follow through with what you are saying by forcing him to

> > obey your voice command. Do this over and over as many times as he needs

> > in order to " get it. "

> >

> > If he is a strong willed child he will no doubt challenge you, so you

> > will have to get stronger in meaning it. How bad to you want him to

> > learn to obey you and be an obedient child?

> >

> > He is not the problem you are the problem for not training him to obey

> > you and to respect your authority.

> >

> > It does not matter of if he has autism he still has to be trained, and

> > all the more so because he is going to have a harder time functioning in

> > a world where the other kids already know this stuff. He will not be

> > excused from obeying authority because he has autism.

> >

> > Also if he was only recently diagnosed what have you been using to train

> > him? By 3 1/2 he should be doing really well obeying you by now...

> >

> > Carolyn

> >

> >

> > karjina wrote:

> > >

> > > Okay,

> > >

> > > My 3.5 year old son runs off. I posted about this before, but I need

> > > some new ideas. This week, once, up to 3 times a day he has gotten

> > > away from me. Not just 10 or 20 or even 50 feet. I'm talking about

> > > running off, going around the bend where I can't see, ignoring all

> > > requests to come back. I had to employ the help of strangers to corral

> > > him while I caught up...then today, my worst nightmare!

> > >

> > > We were home, I was talking to my neighbor for a minute or two. He

> > > goes 10 feet away to see if the plants need water, I look up and he's

> > > GONE! We looked everywhere, couldn't find him, so I had to call the

> > > police. The groundskeeper where we lived found him 15 minutes later,

> > > thank goodness, but I was hysterical.

> > >

> > > my question: what kind of therapist deals with this type of problem?

> > > He's newly diagnosed, so a lot of his therapy has not started yet, but

> > > who do I discuss this with? Is it OT? social skills? psychiatrist?

> > > ABA? or what?

> > >

> > > Thanks so much for any guidance.

> > >

> > >

> >

> >

> > ------------------------------------

> >

> >