Re: New to this site.......FullhouseX5

[Guest guest]

-- We made the decision to put Dad in asst Living after he

wandered out in snowstorm and cracked his head open (January). He

was admitted to Psych ward to balance his meds first, but he went

downhill while there and Soc Workers said we needed to find a

Dementia Unit.

We found the facility and made the decision while dad was " out of

it " . Of course, by time he was released from hospital, he was back

with it. It would have been easier had he not understood all that

was happening.

It has taken a while, but he is now okay with being there. It's

tough because he's the highest cognitive person on his unit. We

seem to have a good balance of meds. However, he had a bad spell

for about 2 weeks in April -- which is when I learned about LBD.

Since he's come around, we've been able to explain what he was like

and that this is what Lewy Body is -- ups and downs. He understands

that the good times will decrease and the bad times will increase.

His biggest concern about it seems to be on how hard that will be

for us kids.

When he talks about moving to asst living side or home, I can say

that he may be able to live on asst living side 90% of the time, but

we have to be prepared for the 10%. He seems to accept this. Also,

his facility works with his condition and he usually eats on the

asst living side and joins many of their activities. THat has

helped his mood tremendously.

Hope this helps you decide about what to tell your Dad. Patti and

Chip may have other thoughts for you too.

Lori

Detroit

> Janet,

>

> Thank you for your response. LBD is hard on the caregiver! But

my mom

> hasn't wanted to take care of him for a long time. When she gets

help, she

> utilizes it for herself, not him. Any all she does in front of im

is

> degrade him. She threatens him with putting him in a nursing hom

when they

> argue. When my dad is in her care, he is incontinent. Our

daycare programs

> out our way won't take him. She plays with his meds when she

feels like it.

> Him being in her care scares us. We have offered to take him to

our

> house, as have my sisters. She refuses because she doesn't want

his SS or

> disability to leave. She has no income and chooses not to work.

She uses

> up his money. I know I sound bitter, I am. Things haven't been

well

> between my mother and her children for quite some time. We all

feel the

> same way. And we always seem to be bashing her trying to convince

people

> that she is not a nice person at times because we feel so guilty

for feeling

> this was. It has been a tough road and will only get worse. We

have

> decided to place him in an assisted living facility. If not, he

will do his

> typical cycle every month. ER, hospital, rehap, home. Every

month. My mom

> won't tell him he is staying, and I am having a hard time coping

with that.

> Right now he is dead on mentally and is catching on. I am not

sure what I

> am going to do.

>

>

>

> >From: Janet Colello <janetcolello@y...>

> >Reply-To: LBDcaregivers

> >To: LBDcaregivers

> >Subject: Re: New to this site.......FullhouseX5

> >Date: Sun, 26 Jun 2005 11:45:22 -0700 (PDT)

> >

>

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

Donna,

My mom has POA over my Dad and my Dad has complained about it from time to time.

One time I went to visit my Dad on one of his hospital trips I found out that my

Mom told the staff that he was a DNR III and that she would provide proof. The

hospital put this on the chart and I freaked out. I demanded it be taken off of

his chart and my sisters and I called my mom to have a meeting. We went over

the POA and their living will. He isn't a DNR III and we discussed joint POA.

My mom agreed and got better with his care. The threat of me taking her to

court to get POA made her realize that we were closely watching the situation.

He was just told last night of his disease and that he is staying there and he

took it hard. I had a visit with him today and we talk for quite some time. I

hope it helped. I told him that it will get better. I hope it will.

Re: New to this site.......FullhouseX5

Welcome to LBDcaregivers.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------