Re: My Son Is Sensitive To Hearing Certain Topics

[Guest guest]

what did you try?

From: Riley

Sent: Thursday, June 09, 2011 6:54 PM

To: autism-aspergers

Subject: Re: My Son Is Sensitive To Hearing Certain Topics

Your son sounds like mine a few years ago. I am not sure if he did learn what we wanted him to because we got through to him or because he eventually figured it out for himself. Some things we are still working on.

with my daughter who is autistic is really easy and I can teach her that without a problem. getting her brothers and sisters to understand that it takes on average 6 months for her to learn and retain what we are teaching her is another problem. For my son with aspergers, it is another story. If you try to redirect him or explain to him what his words or actions caused he just starts yelling, putting himself down and we all just end up getting frustrated and not accomplishing anything. when we try to go back later the only response we get from him is ok and we have no idea whether he took in what we said.

From: marilyn

Sent: Thursday, June 09, 2011 4:00 PM

To: autism-aspergers

Subject: Re: My Son Is Sensitive To Hearing Certain Topics

I call it "teaching blue to a blind man". It's so hard to teach what is normally just understood.

Marilyn

From: Angel S See mailto:angelsue7725@...To: autism-aspergers Sent: Friday, June 10, 2011 5:46 AMSubject: Re: My Son Is Sensitive To Hearing Certain Topics

I too have a difficulty with seeing my kids having no empathy. My 7 and 12 yr old seem to have no empathy and it is hard to deal with. We have to try to teach them what empathy is and then give them the correct response that they should have or say when something happens.

From:

Sent: Thursday, June 09, 2011 3:08 PM

To: autism-aspergers

Subject: RE: My Son Is Sensitive To Hearing Certain Topics

My daughter leaps to the most dramatic interpretation so often you almost get whiplash listening to her. She is on meds now for anxiety and that has soothed this somewhat. It doesn’t have to be anything in particular, just whatever she panics about at that moment (she tends to half pay attention to conversations around her then loudly blurt out whatever word/phrase caught her attention usually getting it wrong). For example my husband will say to me “I’m not going to that restaurant again†and she will blurt out “we’re never going out to eat again????!!!!†Then we have to calm her down and take her through the logic of what we actually said etc.

It does sound like your child has a lot of empathy though and I don’t think that’s a bad thing. I mean my daughter giggles when bad things happen to people in stories so I kinda envy you.

From: autism-aspergers [mailto: autism-aspergers ] On Behalf Of JennSent: Thursday, June 09, 2011 12:26 PMTo: autism-aspergers Subject: My Son Is Sensitive To Hearing Certain Topics

I am just wondering if any of your kids blow things out of proportion when they hear certain topics? My son does not like to hear anything that has to do with someone getting hurt, the military, policemen, wars, or slavery, etc. Even if he is learning about it in school. Whenever he does, he will add things to it (that are not true, he is just assuming it's true), and completely blow it out or proportion and get upset.

For example, he is doing summer school with his Special Ed teacher (thru his online charter school). Today they were reading about slavery, and then when heard about that someone's owner did not beat them, he lost it! He said, "U mean they beat them up, and kill them?!?!" He totally melted down, and refused to read anymore. I sent his teacher a message, saying he was upset about it, and she stopped the reading.

I am just wondering if this is common for our kids to think this way? And if so, is there anyway to help them think through it differently? It seems to be getting worse as he gets older.

Thanks!Jenn

[Guest guest]

what did you try?

From: Riley

Sent: Thursday, June 09, 2011 6:54 PM

To: autism-aspergers

Subject: Re: My Son Is Sensitive To Hearing Certain Topics

Your son sounds like mine a few years ago. I am not sure if he did learn what we wanted him to because we got through to him or because he eventually figured it out for himself. Some things we are still working on.

with my daughter who is autistic is really easy and I can teach her that without a problem. getting her brothers and sisters to understand that it takes on average 6 months for her to learn and retain what we are teaching her is another problem. For my son with aspergers, it is another story. If you try to redirect him or explain to him what his words or actions caused he just starts yelling, putting himself down and we all just end up getting frustrated and not accomplishing anything. when we try to go back later the only response we get from him is ok and we have no idea whether he took in what we said.

From: marilyn

Sent: Thursday, June 09, 2011 4:00 PM

To: autism-aspergers

Subject: Re: My Son Is Sensitive To Hearing Certain Topics

I call it "teaching blue to a blind man". It's so hard to teach what is normally just understood.

Marilyn

From: Angel S See mailto:angelsue7725@...To: autism-aspergers Sent: Friday, June 10, 2011 5:46 AMSubject: Re: My Son Is Sensitive To Hearing Certain Topics

I too have a difficulty with seeing my kids having no empathy. My 7 and 12 yr old seem to have no empathy and it is hard to deal with. We have to try to teach them what empathy is and then give them the correct response that they should have or say when something happens.

From:

Sent: Thursday, June 09, 2011 3:08 PM

To: autism-aspergers

Subject: RE: My Son Is Sensitive To Hearing Certain Topics

My daughter leaps to the most dramatic interpretation so often you almost get whiplash listening to her. She is on meds now for anxiety and that has soothed this somewhat. It doesn’t have to be anything in particular, just whatever she panics about at that moment (she tends to half pay attention to conversations around her then loudly blurt out whatever word/phrase caught her attention usually getting it wrong). For example my husband will say to me “I’m not going to that restaurant again†and she will blurt out “we’re never going out to eat again????!!!!†Then we have to calm her down and take her through the logic of what we actually said etc.

It does sound like your child has a lot of empathy though and I don’t think that’s a bad thing. I mean my daughter giggles when bad things happen to people in stories so I kinda envy you.

From: autism-aspergers [mailto: autism-aspergers ] On Behalf Of JennSent: Thursday, June 09, 2011 12:26 PMTo: autism-aspergers Subject: My Son Is Sensitive To Hearing Certain Topics

I am just wondering if any of your kids blow things out of proportion when they hear certain topics? My son does not like to hear anything that has to do with someone getting hurt, the military, policemen, wars, or slavery, etc. Even if he is learning about it in school. Whenever he does, he will add things to it (that are not true, he is just assuming it's true), and completely blow it out or proportion and get upset.

For example, he is doing summer school with his Special Ed teacher (thru his online charter school). Today they were reading about slavery, and then when heard about that someone's owner did not beat them, he lost it! He said, "U mean they beat them up, and kill them?!?!" He totally melted down, and refused to read anymore. I sent his teacher a message, saying he was upset about it, and she stopped the reading.

I am just wondering if this is common for our kids to think this way? And if so, is there anyway to help them think through it differently? It seems to be getting worse as he gets older.

Thanks!Jenn

[Guest guest]

Mostly just explaining, trying to get him to see what it would be

like if others acted towards him the way he was acting, and just

reminding him of appropriate responses.  You start to feel like a

broken recording after a while. 

When he was younger it was easier in a way, because we could just

make a rule, and he would try to remember because 'rules are rules',

but now he is a teenager ....

 

what did you try?

 

From:

Riley

Sent: Thursday, June 09, 2011 6:54 PM

To: autism-aspergers

Subject: Re: My Son

Is Sensitive To Hearing Certain Topics

 

 

Your son sounds like mine a few years ago.  I am

not sure if he did learn what we wanted him to

because we got through to him or because he

eventually figured it out for himself.  Some

things we are still working on.

 

with my daughter who is autistic is

really easy and I can teach her that

without a problem. getting her brothers

and sisters to understand that it takes on

average 6 months for her to learn and

retain what we are teaching her is another

problem.  For my son with aspergers, it is

another story.  If you try to redirect him

or explain to him what his words or

actions caused he just starts yelling,

putting himself down and we all just end

up getting frustrated and not

accomplishing anything.  when we try to go

back later the only response we get from

him is ok and we have no idea whether he

took in what we said.

 

From: marilyn

Sent: Thursday, June 09,

2011 4:00 PM

To: autism-aspergers

Subject: Re:

My Son Is

Sensitive To Hearing Certain Topics

 

 

I call it "teaching blue to

a blind man". It's so hard to

teach what is normally just

understood.

 

Marilyn

From:

Angel S See mailto:angelsue7725@...

To: autism-aspergers

Sent:

Friday, June 10, 2011 5:46

AM

Subject:

Re: My

Son Is Sensitive To Hearing

Certain Topics

 

I too have a

difficulty with

seeing my kids

having no empathy.

My 7 and 12 yr old

seem to have no

empathy and it is

hard to deal with. 

We have to try to

teach them what

empathy is and then

give them the

correct response

that they should

have or say when

something happens.

 

From:

Sent:

Thursday, June

09, 2011 3:08

PM

To:

autism-aspergers

Subject:

RE:

My Son Is

Sensitive To

Hearing

Certain Topics

 

 

My

daughter leaps

to the most

dramatic

interpretation

so often you

almost get

whiplash

listening to

her.  She is

on meds now

for anxiety

and that has

soothed this

somewhat.  It

doesn’t have

to be anything

in particular,

just whatever

she panics

about at that

moment (she

tends to half

pay attention

to

conversations

around her

then loudly

blurt out

whatever

word/phrase

caught her

attention

usually

getting it

wrong).  For

example my

husband will

say to me “I’m

not going to

that

restaurant

again†and she

will blurt out

“we’re never

going out to

eat

again????!!!!â€Â 

Then we have

to calm her

down and take

her through

the logic of

what we

actually said

etc. 

It does

sound like

your child has

a lot of

empathy though

and I don’t

think that’s a

bad thing.  I

mean my

daughter

giggles when

bad things

happen to

people in

stories so I

kinda envy

you.

From: autism-aspergers

[mailto: autism-aspergers

] On

Behalf Of Jenn

Sent:

Thursday, June

09, 2011 12:26

PM

To:

autism-aspergers

Subject:

My Son Is

Sensitive To

Hearing

Certain Topics

 

I am

just wondering

if any of your

kids blow

things out of

proportion

when they hear

certain

topics? My son

does not like

to hear

anything that

has to do with

someone

getting hurt,

the military,

policemen,

wars, or

slavery, etc.

Even if he is

learning about

it in school.

Whenever he

does, he will

add things to

it (that are

not true, he

is just

assuming it's

true), and

completely

blow it out or

proportion and

get upset.

For example,

he is doing

summer school

with his

Special Ed

teacher (thru

his online

charter

school). Today

they were

reading about

slavery, and

then when

heard

about that

someone's

owner did not

beat them, he

lost it! He

said, "U mean

they beat them

up, and kill

them?!?!" He

totally melted

down, and

refused to

read anymore.

I sent his

teacher a

message,

saying he was

upset about

it, and she

stopped the

reading.

I am

just wondering

if this is

common for our

kids to think

this way? And

if so, is

there anyway

to help them

think through

it

differently?

It seems to be

getting worse

as he gets

older.

Thanks!

Jenn

[Guest guest]

Mostly just explaining, trying to get him to see what it would be

like if others acted towards him the way he was acting, and just

reminding him of appropriate responses.  You start to feel like a

broken recording after a while. 

When he was younger it was easier in a way, because we could just

make a rule, and he would try to remember because 'rules are rules',

but now he is a teenager ....

 

what did you try?

 

From:

Riley

Sent: Thursday, June 09, 2011 6:54 PM

To: autism-aspergers

Subject: Re: My Son

Is Sensitive To Hearing Certain Topics

 

 

Your son sounds like mine a few years ago.  I am

not sure if he did learn what we wanted him to

because we got through to him or because he

eventually figured it out for himself.  Some

things we are still working on.

 

with my daughter who is autistic is

really easy and I can teach her that

without a problem. getting her brothers

and sisters to understand that it takes on

average 6 months for her to learn and

retain what we are teaching her is another

problem.  For my son with aspergers, it is

another story.  If you try to redirect him

or explain to him what his words or

actions caused he just starts yelling,

putting himself down and we all just end

up getting frustrated and not

accomplishing anything.  when we try to go

back later the only response we get from

him is ok and we have no idea whether he

took in what we said.

 

From: marilyn

Sent: Thursday, June 09,

2011 4:00 PM

To: autism-aspergers

Subject: Re:

My Son Is

Sensitive To Hearing Certain Topics

 

 

I call it "teaching blue to

a blind man". It's so hard to

teach what is normally just

understood.

 

Marilyn

From:

Angel S See mailto:angelsue7725@...

To: autism-aspergers

Sent:

Friday, June 10, 2011 5:46

AM

Subject:

Re: My

Son Is Sensitive To Hearing

Certain Topics

 

I too have a

difficulty with

seeing my kids

having no empathy.

My 7 and 12 yr old

seem to have no

empathy and it is

hard to deal with. 

We have to try to

teach them what

empathy is and then

give them the

correct response

that they should

have or say when

something happens.

 

From:

Sent:

Thursday, June

09, 2011 3:08

PM

To:

autism-aspergers

Subject:

RE:

My Son Is

Sensitive To

Hearing

Certain Topics

 

 

My

daughter leaps

to the most

dramatic

interpretation

so often you

almost get

whiplash

listening to

her.  She is

on meds now

for anxiety

and that has

soothed this

somewhat.  It

doesn’t have

to be anything

in particular,

just whatever

she panics

about at that

moment (she

tends to half

pay attention

to

conversations

around her

then loudly

blurt out

whatever

word/phrase

caught her

attention

usually

getting it

wrong).  For

example my

husband will

say to me “I’m

not going to

that

restaurant

again†and she

will blurt out

“we’re never

going out to

eat

again????!!!!â€Â 

Then we have

to calm her

down and take

her through

the logic of

what we

actually said

etc. 

It does

sound like

your child has

a lot of

empathy though

and I don’t

think that’s a

bad thing.  I

mean my

daughter

giggles when

bad things

happen to

people in

stories so I

kinda envy

you.

From: autism-aspergers

[mailto: autism-aspergers

] On

Behalf Of Jenn

Sent:

Thursday, June

09, 2011 12:26

PM

To:

autism-aspergers

Subject:

My Son Is

Sensitive To

Hearing

Certain Topics

 

I am

just wondering

if any of your

kids blow

things out of

proportion

when they hear

certain

topics? My son

does not like

to hear

anything that

has to do with

someone

getting hurt,

the military,

policemen,

wars, or

slavery, etc.

Even if he is

learning about

it in school.

Whenever he

does, he will

add things to

it (that are

not true, he

is just

assuming it's

true), and

completely

blow it out or

proportion and

get upset.

For example,

he is doing

summer school

with his

Special Ed

teacher (thru

his online

charter

school). Today

they were

reading about

slavery, and

then when

heard

about that

someone's

owner did not

beat them, he

lost it! He

said, "U mean

they beat them

up, and kill

them?!?!" He

totally melted

down, and

refused to

read anymore.

I sent his

teacher a

message,

saying he was

upset about

it, and she

stopped the

reading.

I am

just wondering

if this is

common for our

kids to think

this way? And

if so, is

there anyway

to help them

think through

it

differently?

It seems to be

getting worse

as he gets

older.

Thanks!

Jenn

[Guest guest]

Mostly just explaining, trying to get him to see what it would be

like if others acted towards him the way he was acting, and just

reminding him of appropriate responses.  You start to feel like a

broken recording after a while. 

When he was younger it was easier in a way, because we could just

make a rule, and he would try to remember because 'rules are rules',

but now he is a teenager ....

 

what did you try?

 

From:

Riley

Sent: Thursday, June 09, 2011 6:54 PM

To: autism-aspergers

Subject: Re: My Son

Is Sensitive To Hearing Certain Topics

 

 

Your son sounds like mine a few years ago.  I am

not sure if he did learn what we wanted him to

because we got through to him or because he

eventually figured it out for himself.  Some

things we are still working on.

 

with my daughter who is autistic is

really easy and I can teach her that

without a problem. getting her brothers

and sisters to understand that it takes on

average 6 months for her to learn and

retain what we are teaching her is another

problem.  For my son with aspergers, it is

another story.  If you try to redirect him

or explain to him what his words or

actions caused he just starts yelling,

putting himself down and we all just end

up getting frustrated and not

accomplishing anything.  when we try to go

back later the only response we get from

him is ok and we have no idea whether he

took in what we said.

 

From: marilyn

Sent: Thursday, June 09,

2011 4:00 PM

To: autism-aspergers

Subject: Re:

My Son Is

Sensitive To Hearing Certain Topics

 

 

I call it "teaching blue to

a blind man". It's so hard to

teach what is normally just

understood.

 

Marilyn

From:

Angel S See mailto:angelsue7725@...

To: autism-aspergers

Sent:

Friday, June 10, 2011 5:46

AM

Subject:

Re: My

Son Is Sensitive To Hearing

Certain Topics

 

I too have a

difficulty with

seeing my kids

having no empathy.

My 7 and 12 yr old

seem to have no

empathy and it is

hard to deal with. 

We have to try to

teach them what

empathy is and then

give them the

correct response

that they should

have or say when

something happens.

 

From:

Sent:

Thursday, June

09, 2011 3:08

PM

To:

autism-aspergers

Subject:

RE:

My Son Is

Sensitive To

Hearing

Certain Topics

 

 

My

daughter leaps

to the most

dramatic

interpretation

so often you

almost get

whiplash

listening to

her.  She is

on meds now

for anxiety

and that has

soothed this

somewhat.  It

doesn’t have

to be anything

in particular,

just whatever

she panics

about at that

moment (she

tends to half

pay attention

to

conversations

around her

then loudly

blurt out

whatever

word/phrase

caught her

attention

usually

getting it

wrong).  For

example my

husband will

say to me “I’m

not going to

that

restaurant

again†and she

will blurt out

“we’re never

going out to

eat

again????!!!!â€Â 

Then we have

to calm her

down and take

her through

the logic of

what we

actually said

etc. 

It does

sound like

your child has

a lot of

empathy though

and I don’t

think that’s a

bad thing.  I

mean my

daughter

giggles when

bad things

happen to

people in

stories so I

kinda envy

you.

From: autism-aspergers

[mailto: autism-aspergers

] On

Behalf Of Jenn

Sent:

Thursday, June

09, 2011 12:26

PM

To:

autism-aspergers

Subject:

My Son Is

Sensitive To

Hearing

Certain Topics

 

I am

just wondering

if any of your

kids blow

things out of

proportion

when they hear

certain

topics? My son

does not like

to hear

anything that

has to do with

someone

getting hurt,

the military,

policemen,

wars, or

slavery, etc.

Even if he is

learning about

it in school.

Whenever he

does, he will

add things to

it (that are

not true, he

is just

assuming it's

true), and

completely

blow it out or

proportion and

get upset.

For example,

he is doing

summer school

with his

Special Ed

teacher (thru

his online

charter

school). Today

they were

reading about

slavery, and

then when

heard

about that

someone's

owner did not

beat them, he

lost it! He

said, "U mean

they beat them

up, and kill

them?!?!" He

totally melted

down, and

refused to

read anymore.

I sent his

teacher a

message,

saying he was

upset about

it, and she

stopped the

reading.

I am

just wondering

if this is

common for our

kids to think

this way? And

if so, is

there anyway

to help them

think through

it

differently?

It seems to be

getting worse

as he gets

older.

Thanks!

Jenn

[Guest guest]

Oh, I remember when black was black because it was black. I miss those days....Now he is more typical because he wants everything explained but then when I explain (the a-typical part is.....) he doesn't accept the explanation. He has it fixed in his head (before he asks me the question) what the answer is, so when my answer is different than he thinks it is he says, but I think it means.......blah blah blah......so then why did you even bother asking me if you already knew? We go into this circle ALL THE TIME!! To: autism-aspergers Sent: Thu, June 9, 2011 10:17:10 PMSubject: Re: My Son Is Sensitive To Hearing Certain Topics

Mostly just explaining, trying to get him to see what it would be

like if others acted towards him the way he was acting, and just

reminding him of appropriate responses. You start to feel like a

broken recording after a while.

When he was younger it was easier in a way, because we could just

make a rule, and he would try to remember because 'rules are rules',

but now he is a teenager ....

what did you try?

From:

Riley

Sent: Thursday, June 09, 2011 6:54 PM

To: autism-aspergers

Subject: Re: My Son

Is Sensitive To Hearing Certain Topics

Your son sounds like mine a few years ago. I am

not sure if he did learn what we wanted him to

because we got through to him or because he

eventually figured it out for himself. Some

things we are still working on.

with my daughter who is autistic is

really easy and I can teach her that

without a problem. getting her brothers

and sisters to understand that it takes on

average 6 months for her to learn and

retain what we are teaching her is another

problem. For my son with aspergers, it is

another story. If you try to redirect him

or explain to him what his words or

actions caused he just starts yelling,

putting himself down and we all just end

up getting frustrated and not

accomplishing anything. when we try to go

back later the only response we get from

him is ok and we have no idea whether he

took in what we said.

From: marilyn

Sent: Thursday, June 09,

2011 4:00 PM

To: autism-aspergers

Subject: Re:

My Son Is

Sensitive To Hearing Certain Topics

I call it "teaching blue to

a blind man". It's so hard to

teach what is normally just

understood.

Marilyn

From:

Angel S See mailto:angelsue7725@...

To: autism-aspergers

Sent:

Friday, June 10, 2011 5:46

AM

Subject:

Re: My

Son Is Sensitive To Hearing

Certain Topics

I too have a

difficulty with

seeing my kids

having no empathy.

My 7 and 12 yr old

seem to have no

empathy and it is

hard to deal with.

We have to try to

teach them what

empathy is and then

give them the

correct response

that they should

have or say when

something happens.

From:

Sent:

Thursday, June

09, 2011 3:08

PM

To:

autism-aspergers

Subject:

RE:

My Son Is

Sensitive To

Hearing

Certain Topics

My

daughter leaps

to the most

dramatic

interpretation

so often you

almost get

whiplash

listening to

her. She is

on meds now

for anxiety

and that has

soothed this

somewhat. It

doesn’t have

to be anything

in particular,

just whatever

she panics

about at that

moment (she

tends to half

pay attention

to

conversations

around her

then loudly

blurt out

whatever

word/phrase

caught her

attention

usually

getting it

wrong). For

example my

husband will

say to me “I’m

not going to

that

restaurant

again†and she

will blurt out

“we’re never

going out to

eat

again????!!!!â€

Then we have

to calm her

down and take

her through

the logic of

what we

actually said

etc.

It does

sound like

your child has

a lot of

empathy though

and I don’t

think that’s a

bad thing. I

mean my

daughter

giggles when

bad things

happen to

people in

stories so I

kinda envy

you.

From: autism-aspergers

[mailto: autism-aspergers

] On

Behalf Of Jenn

Sent:

Thursday, June

09, 2011 12:26

PM

To:

autism-aspergers

Subject:

My Son Is

Sensitive To

Hearing

Certain Topics

I am

just wondering

if any of your

kids blow

things out of

proportion

when they hear

certain

topics? My son

does not like

to hear

anything that

has to do with

someone

getting hurt,

the military,

policemen,

wars, or

slavery, etc.

Even if he is

learning about

it in school.

Whenever he

does, he will

add things to

it (that are

not true, he

is just

assuming it's

true), and

completely

blow it out or

proportion and

get upset.

For example,

he is doing

summer school

with his

Special Ed

teacher (thru

his online

charter

school). Today

they were

reading about

slavery, and

then when

heard

about that

someone's

owner did not

beat them, he

lost it! He

said, "U mean

they beat them

up, and kill

them?!?!" He

totally melted

down, and

refused to

read anymore.

I sent his

teacher a

message,

saying he was

upset about

it, and she

stopped the

reading.

I am

just wondering

if this is

common for our

kids to think

this way? And

if so, is

there anyway

to help them

think through

it

differently?

It seems to be

getting worse

as he gets

older.

Thanks!

Jenn

[Guest guest]

Oh, I remember when black was black because it was black. I miss those days....Now he is more typical because he wants everything explained but then when I explain (the a-typical part is.....) he doesn't accept the explanation. He has it fixed in his head (before he asks me the question) what the answer is, so when my answer is different than he thinks it is he says, but I think it means.......blah blah blah......so then why did you even bother asking me if you already knew? We go into this circle ALL THE TIME!! To: autism-aspergers Sent: Thu, June 9, 2011 10:17:10 PMSubject: Re: My Son Is Sensitive To Hearing Certain Topics

Mostly just explaining, trying to get him to see what it would be

like if others acted towards him the way he was acting, and just

reminding him of appropriate responses. You start to feel like a

broken recording after a while.

When he was younger it was easier in a way, because we could just

make a rule, and he would try to remember because 'rules are rules',

but now he is a teenager ....

what did you try?

From:

Riley

Sent: Thursday, June 09, 2011 6:54 PM

To: autism-aspergers

Subject: Re: My Son

Is Sensitive To Hearing Certain Topics

Your son sounds like mine a few years ago. I am

not sure if he did learn what we wanted him to

because we got through to him or because he

eventually figured it out for himself. Some

things we are still working on.

with my daughter who is autistic is

really easy and I can teach her that

without a problem. getting her brothers

and sisters to understand that it takes on

average 6 months for her to learn and

retain what we are teaching her is another

problem. For my son with aspergers, it is

another story. If you try to redirect him

or explain to him what his words or

actions caused he just starts yelling,

putting himself down and we all just end

up getting frustrated and not

accomplishing anything. when we try to go

back later the only response we get from

him is ok and we have no idea whether he

took in what we said.

From: marilyn

Sent: Thursday, June 09,

2011 4:00 PM

To: autism-aspergers

Subject: Re:

My Son Is

Sensitive To Hearing Certain Topics

I call it "teaching blue to

a blind man". It's so hard to

teach what is normally just

understood.

Marilyn

From:

Angel S See mailto:angelsue7725@...

To: autism-aspergers

Sent:

Friday, June 10, 2011 5:46

AM

Subject:

Re: My

Son Is Sensitive To Hearing

Certain Topics

I too have a

difficulty with

seeing my kids

having no empathy.

My 7 and 12 yr old

seem to have no

empathy and it is

hard to deal with.

We have to try to

teach them what

empathy is and then

give them the

correct response

that they should

have or say when

something happens.

From:

Sent:

Thursday, June

09, 2011 3:08

PM

To:

autism-aspergers

Subject:

RE:

My Son Is

Sensitive To

Hearing

Certain Topics

My

daughter leaps

to the most

dramatic

interpretation

so often you

almost get

whiplash

listening to

her. She is

on meds now

for anxiety

and that has

soothed this

somewhat. It

doesn’t have

to be anything

in particular,

just whatever

she panics

about at that

moment (she

tends to half

pay attention

to

conversations

around her

then loudly

blurt out

whatever

word/phrase

caught her

attention

usually

getting it

wrong). For

example my

husband will

say to me “I’m

not going to

that

restaurant

again†and she

will blurt out

“we’re never

going out to

eat

again????!!!!â€

Then we have

to calm her

down and take

her through

the logic of

what we

actually said

etc.

It does

sound like

your child has

a lot of

empathy though

and I don’t

think that’s a

bad thing. I

mean my

daughter

giggles when

bad things

happen to

people in

stories so I

kinda envy

you.

From: autism-aspergers

[mailto: autism-aspergers

] On

Behalf Of Jenn

Sent:

Thursday, June

09, 2011 12:26

PM

To:

autism-aspergers

Subject:

My Son Is

Sensitive To

Hearing

Certain Topics

I am

just wondering

if any of your

kids blow

things out of

proportion

when they hear

certain

topics? My son

does not like

to hear

anything that

has to do with

someone

getting hurt,

the military,

policemen,

wars, or

slavery, etc.

Even if he is

learning about

it in school.

Whenever he

does, he will

add things to

it (that are

not true, he

is just

assuming it's

true), and

completely

blow it out or

proportion and

get upset.

For example,

he is doing

summer school

with his

Special Ed

teacher (thru

his online

charter

school). Today

they were

reading about

slavery, and

then when

heard

about that

someone's

owner did not

beat them, he

lost it! He

said, "U mean

they beat them

up, and kill

them?!?!" He

totally melted

down, and

refused to

read anymore.

I sent his

teacher a

message,

saying he was

upset about

it, and she

stopped the

reading.

I am

just wondering

if this is

common for our

kids to think

this way? And

if so, is

there anyway

to help them

think through

it

differently?

It seems to be

getting worse

as he gets

older.

Thanks!

Jenn

[Guest guest]

Oh, I remember when black was black because it was black. I miss those days....Now he is more typical because he wants everything explained but then when I explain (the a-typical part is.....) he doesn't accept the explanation. He has it fixed in his head (before he asks me the question) what the answer is, so when my answer is different than he thinks it is he says, but I think it means.......blah blah blah......so then why did you even bother asking me if you already knew? We go into this circle ALL THE TIME!! To: autism-aspergers Sent: Thu, June 9, 2011 10:17:10 PMSubject: Re: My Son Is Sensitive To Hearing Certain Topics

Mostly just explaining, trying to get him to see what it would be

like if others acted towards him the way he was acting, and just

reminding him of appropriate responses. You start to feel like a

broken recording after a while.

When he was younger it was easier in a way, because we could just

make a rule, and he would try to remember because 'rules are rules',

but now he is a teenager ....

what did you try?

From:

Riley

Sent: Thursday, June 09, 2011 6:54 PM

To: autism-aspergers

Subject: Re: My Son

Is Sensitive To Hearing Certain Topics

Your son sounds like mine a few years ago. I am

not sure if he did learn what we wanted him to

because we got through to him or because he

eventually figured it out for himself. Some

things we are still working on.

with my daughter who is autistic is

really easy and I can teach her that

without a problem. getting her brothers

and sisters to understand that it takes on

average 6 months for her to learn and

retain what we are teaching her is another

problem. For my son with aspergers, it is

another story. If you try to redirect him

or explain to him what his words or

actions caused he just starts yelling,

putting himself down and we all just end

up getting frustrated and not

accomplishing anything. when we try to go

back later the only response we get from

him is ok and we have no idea whether he

took in what we said.

From: marilyn

Sent: Thursday, June 09,

2011 4:00 PM

To: autism-aspergers

Subject: Re:

My Son Is

Sensitive To Hearing Certain Topics

I call it "teaching blue to

a blind man". It's so hard to

teach what is normally just

understood.

Marilyn

From:

Angel S See mailto:angelsue7725@...

To: autism-aspergers

Sent:

Friday, June 10, 2011 5:46

AM

Subject:

Re: My

Son Is Sensitive To Hearing

Certain Topics

I too have a

difficulty with

seeing my kids

having no empathy.

My 7 and 12 yr old

seem to have no

empathy and it is

hard to deal with.

We have to try to

teach them what

empathy is and then

give them the

correct response

that they should

have or say when

something happens.

From:

Sent:

Thursday, June

09, 2011 3:08

PM

To:

autism-aspergers

Subject:

RE:

My Son Is

Sensitive To

Hearing

Certain Topics

My

daughter leaps

to the most

dramatic

interpretation

so often you

almost get

whiplash

listening to

her. She is

on meds now

for anxiety

and that has

soothed this

somewhat. It

doesn’t have

to be anything

in particular,

just whatever

she panics

about at that

moment (she

tends to half

pay attention

to

conversations

around her

then loudly

blurt out

whatever

word/phrase

caught her

attention

usually

getting it

wrong). For

example my

husband will

say to me “I’m

not going to

that

restaurant

again†and she

will blurt out

“we’re never

going out to

eat

again????!!!!â€

Then we have

to calm her

down and take

her through

the logic of

what we

actually said

etc.

It does

sound like

your child has

a lot of

empathy though

and I don’t

think that’s a

bad thing. I

mean my

daughter

giggles when

bad things

happen to

people in

stories so I

kinda envy

you.

From: autism-aspergers

[mailto: autism-aspergers

] On

Behalf Of Jenn

Sent:

Thursday, June

09, 2011 12:26

PM

To:

autism-aspergers

Subject:

My Son Is

Sensitive To

Hearing

Certain Topics

I am

just wondering

if any of your

kids blow

things out of

proportion

when they hear

certain

topics? My son

does not like

to hear

anything that

has to do with

someone

getting hurt,

the military,

policemen,

wars, or

slavery, etc.

Even if he is

learning about

it in school.

Whenever he

does, he will

add things to

it (that are

not true, he

is just

assuming it's

true), and

completely

blow it out or

proportion and

get upset.

For example,

he is doing

summer school

with his

Special Ed

teacher (thru

his online

charter

school). Today

they were

reading about

slavery, and

then when

heard

about that

someone's

owner did not

beat them, he

lost it! He

said, "U mean

they beat them

up, and kill

them?!?!" He

totally melted

down, and

refused to

read anymore.

I sent his

teacher a

message,

saying he was

upset about

it, and she

stopped the

reading.

I am

just wondering

if this is

common for our

kids to think

this way? And

if so, is

there anyway

to help them

think through

it

differently?

It seems to be

getting worse

as he gets

older.

Thanks!

Jenn

[Guest guest]

yes we have the teenager mind set, he is going through puberty and we see that he has gotten so much better in some areas and progressively worse in others. we are doing the constant reminders and yes we do feel like a broken record but we will keep at it.

From: Riley

Sent: Thursday, June 09, 2011 9:17 PM

To: autism-aspergers

Subject: Re: My Son Is Sensitive To Hearing Certain Topics

Mostly just explaining, trying to get him to see what it would be like if others acted towards him the way he was acting, and just reminding him of appropriate responses. You start to feel like a broken recording after a while. When he was younger it was easier in a way, because we could just make a rule, and he would try to remember because 'rules are rules', but now he is a teenager ....

what did you try?

From: Riley

Sent: Thursday, June 09, 2011 6:54 PM

To: autism-aspergers

Subject: Re: My Son Is Sensitive To Hearing Certain Topics

Your son sounds like mine a few years ago. I am not sure if he did learn what we wanted him to because we got through to him or because he eventually figured it out for himself. Some things we are still working on.

with my daughter who is autistic is really easy and I can teach her that without a problem. getting her brothers and sisters to understand that it takes on average 6 months for her to learn and retain what we are teaching her is another problem. For my son with aspergers, it is another story. If you try to redirect him or explain to him what his words or actions caused he just starts yelling, putting himself down and we all just end up getting frustrated and not accomplishing anything. when we try to go back later the only response we get from him is ok and we have no idea whether he took in what we said.

From: marilyn

Sent: Thursday, June 09, 2011 4:00 PM

To: autism-aspergers

Subject: Re: My Son Is Sensitive To Hearing Certain Topics

I call it "teaching blue to a blind man". It's so hard to teach what is normally just understood.

Marilyn

From: Angel S See mailto:angelsue7725@...To: autism-aspergers Sent: Friday, June 10, 2011 5:46 AMSubject: Re: My Son Is Sensitive To Hearing Certain Topics

I too have a difficulty with seeing my kids having no empathy. My 7 and 12 yr old seem to have no empathy and it is hard to deal with. We have to try to teach them what empathy is and then give them the correct response that they should have or say when something happens.

From:

Sent: Thursday, June 09, 2011 3:08 PM

To: autism-aspergers

Subject: RE: My Son Is Sensitive To Hearing Certain Topics

My daughter leaps to the most dramatic interpretation so often you almost get whiplash listening to her. She is on meds now for anxiety and that has soothed this somewhat. It doesn’t have to be anything in particular, just whatever she panics about at that moment (she tends to half pay attention to conversations around her then loudly blurt out whatever word/phrase caught her attention usually getting it wrong). For example my husband will say to me “I’m not going to that restaurant again†and she will blurt out “we’re never going out to eat again????!!!!†Then we have to calm her down and take her through the logic of what we actually said etc.

It does sound like your child has a lot of empathy though and I don’t think that’s a bad thing. I mean my daughter giggles when bad things happen to people in stories so I kinda envy you.

From: autism-aspergers [mailto: autism-aspergers ] On Behalf Of JennSent: Thursday, June 09, 2011 12:26 PMTo: autism-aspergers Subject: My Son Is Sensitive To Hearing Certain Topics

I am just wondering if any of your kids blow things out of proportion when they hear certain topics? My son does not like to hear anything that has to do with someone getting hurt, the military, policemen, wars, or slavery, etc. Even if he is learning about it in school. Whenever he does, he will add things to it (that are not true, he is just assuming it's true), and completely blow it out or proportion and get upset.

For example, he is doing summer school with his Special Ed teacher (thru his online charter school). Today they were reading about slavery, and then when heard about that someone's owner did not beat them, he lost it! He said, "U mean they beat them up, and kill them?!?!" He totally melted down, and refused to read anymore. I sent his teacher a message, saying he was upset about it, and she stopped the reading.

I am just wondering if this is common for our kids to think this way? And if so, is there anyway to help them think through it differently? It seems to be getting worse as he gets older.

Thanks!Jenn

[Guest guest]

that sounds like my ex. dang! lol

Oh, I remember when black was black because it was black.  I miss those days....Now he is more typical because he wants everything explained but then when I explain (the a-typical part is.....) he doesn't accept the explanation.  He has it fixed in his head (before he asks me the question) what the answer is, so when my answer is different than he thinks it is he says, but I think it means.......blah blah blah......so then why did you even bother asking me if you already knew?  We go into this circle ALL THE TIME!! 

 

To: autism-aspergers

Sent: Thu, June 9, 2011 10:17:10 PMSubject: Re: My Son Is Sensitive To Hearing Certain Topics

 

Mostly just explaining, trying to get him to see what it would be

like if others acted towards him the way he was acting, and just

reminding him of appropriate responses.  You start to feel like a

broken recording after a while. 

When he was younger it was easier in a way, because we could just

make a rule, and he would try to remember because 'rules are rules',

but now he is a teenager ....

 

what did you try?

 

From:

Riley

Sent: Thursday, June 09, 2011 6:54 PM

To: autism-aspergers

Subject: Re: My Son

Is Sensitive To Hearing Certain Topics

 

 

Your son sounds like mine a few years ago.  I am

not sure if he did learn what we wanted him to

because we got through to him or because he

eventually figured it out for himself.  Some

things we are still working on.

 

with my daughter who is autistic is

really easy and I can teach her that

without a problem. getting her brothers

and sisters to understand that it takes on

average 6 months for her to learn and

retain what we are teaching her is another

problem.  For my son with aspergers, it is

another story.  If you try to redirect him

or explain to him what his words or

actions caused he just starts yelling,

putting himself down and we all just end

up getting frustrated and not

accomplishing anything.  when we try to go

back later the only response we get from

him is ok and we have no idea whether he

took in what we said.

 

From: marilyn

Sent: Thursday, June 09,

2011 4:00 PM

To: autism-aspergers

Subject: Re:

My Son Is

Sensitive To Hearing Certain Topics

 

 

I call it " teaching blue to

a blind man " . It's so hard to

teach what is normally just

understood.

 

Marilyn

From:

Angel S See mailto:angelsue7725@...

To: autism-aspergers

Sent:

Friday, June 10, 2011 5:46

AM

Subject:

Re: My

Son Is Sensitive To Hearing

Certain Topics

 

I too have a

difficulty with

seeing my kids

having no empathy.

My 7 and 12 yr old

seem to have no

empathy and it is

hard to deal with. 

We have to try to

teach them what

empathy is and then

give them the

correct response

that they should

have or say when

something happens.

 

From:

Sent:

Thursday, June

09, 2011 3:08

PM

To:

autism-aspergers

Subject:

RE:

My Son Is

Sensitive To

Hearing

Certain Topics

 

 

My

daughter leaps

to the most

dramatic

interpretation

so often you

almost get

whiplash

listening to

her.  She is

on meds now

for anxiety

and that has

soothed this

somewhat.  It

doesn’t have

to be anything

in particular,

just whatever

she panics

about at that

moment (she

tends to half

pay attention

to

conversations

around her

then loudly

blurt out

whatever

word/phrase

caught her

attention

usually

getting it

wrong).  For

example my

husband will

say to me “I’m

not going to

that

restaurant

again” and she

will blurt out

“we’re never

going out to

eat

again????!!!!” 

Then we have

to calm her

down and take

her through

the logic of

what we

actually said

etc. 

It does

sound like

your child has

a lot of

empathy though

and I don’t

think that’s a

bad thing.  I

mean my

daughter

giggles when

bad things

happen to

people in

stories so I

kinda envy

you.

From: autism-aspergers

[mailto: autism-aspergers

] On

Behalf Of Jenn

Sent:

Thursday, June

09, 2011 12:26

PM

To:

autism-aspergers

Subject:

My Son Is

Sensitive To

Hearing

Certain Topics

 

I am

just wondering

if any of your

kids blow

things out of

proportion

when they hear

certain

topics? My son

does not like

to hear

anything that

has to do with

someone

getting hurt,

the military,

policemen,

wars, or

slavery, etc.

Even if he is

learning about

it in school.

Whenever he

does, he will

add things to

it (that are

not true, he

is just

assuming it's

true), and

completely

blow it out or

proportion and

get upset.

For example,

he is doing

summer school

with his

Special Ed

teacher (thru

his online

charter

school). Today

they were

reading about

slavery, and

then when

heard

about that

someone's

owner did not

beat them, he

lost it! He

said, " U mean

they beat them

up, and kill

them?!?! " He

totally melted

down, and

refused to

read anymore.

I sent his

teacher a

message,

saying he was

upset about

it, and she

stopped the

reading.

I am

just wondering

if this is

common for our

kids to think

this way? And

if so, is

there anyway

to help them

think through

it

differently?

It seems to be

getting worse

as he gets

older.

Thanks!

Jenn

[Guest guest]

How do they test for that? I have that problem with both of my kids that are on the spectrum?

Angel S See

From: marilyn

Sent: Thursday, June 09, 2011 3:31 PM

To: autism-aspergers

Subject: Re: My Son Is Sensitive To Hearing Certain Topics

Ah our sweet ASD kids. they can be SO literal minded. things like "it takes the cake" make them start looking for the cake. ;-)

Check to see if they might have CAPD as well (Central Auditory Processing Disorder). Our son does, and it def. affects how he hears. His hearing is fine but its the way his brain processes language. He's esp deficient on the left side (to the point they literally checked the wires during testing, they thought their wires were crossed, turns out its just his wires that are crossed ;-)

Just takes a lot of patience and explanations and reassurance. As they get older, it gets somewhat easier. Things that made him crazy at 7 are ok at 10. Until then, just be patient and judicious as necessary. It's a minefield.

Marilyn

To: autism-aspergers Sent: Thursday, June 9, 2011 4:08 PMSubject: RE: My Son Is Sensitive To Hearing Certain Topics

My daughter leaps to the most dramatic interpretation so often you almost get whiplash listening to her. She is on meds now for anxiety and that has soothed this somewhat. It doesn’t have to be anything in particular, just whatever she panics about at that moment (she tends to half pay attention to conversations around her then loudly blurt out whatever word/phrase caught her attention usually getting it wrong). For example my husband will say to me “I’m not going to that restaurant again†and she will blurt out “we’re never going out to eat again????!!!!†Then we have to calm her down and take her through the logic of what we actually said etc.

It does sound like your child has a lot of empathy though and I don’t think that’s a bad thing. I mean my daughter giggles when bad things happen to people in stories so I kinda envy you.

From: autism-aspergers [mailto: autism-aspergers ] On Behalf Of JennSent: Thursday, June 09, 2011 12:26 PMTo: autism-aspergers Subject: My Son Is Sensitive To Hearing Certain Topics

I am just wondering if any of your kids blow things out of proportion when they hear certain topics? My son does not like to hear anything that has to do with someone getting hurt, the military, policemen, wars, or slavery, etc. Even if he is learning about it in school. Whenever he does, he will add things to it (that are not true, he is just assuming it's true), and completely blow it out or proportion and get upset.

For example, he is doing summer school with his Special Ed teacher (thru his online charter school). Today they were reading about slavery, and then when heard about that someone's owner did not beat them, he lost it! He said, "U mean they beat them up, and kill them?!?!" He totally melted down, and refused to read anymore. I sent his teacher a message, saying he was upset about it, and she stopped the reading.

I am just wondering if this is common for our kids to think this way? And if so, is there anyway to help them think through it differently? It seems to be getting worse as he gets older.

Thanks!Jenn

[Guest guest]

How do they test for that? I have that problem with both of my kids that are on the spectrum?

Angel S See

From: marilyn

Sent: Thursday, June 09, 2011 3:31 PM

To: autism-aspergers

Subject: Re: My Son Is Sensitive To Hearing Certain Topics

Ah our sweet ASD kids. they can be SO literal minded. things like "it takes the cake" make them start looking for the cake. ;-)

Check to see if they might have CAPD as well (Central Auditory Processing Disorder). Our son does, and it def. affects how he hears. His hearing is fine but its the way his brain processes language. He's esp deficient on the left side (to the point they literally checked the wires during testing, they thought their wires were crossed, turns out its just his wires that are crossed ;-)

Just takes a lot of patience and explanations and reassurance. As they get older, it gets somewhat easier. Things that made him crazy at 7 are ok at 10. Until then, just be patient and judicious as necessary. It's a minefield.

Marilyn

To: autism-aspergers Sent: Thursday, June 9, 2011 4:08 PMSubject: RE: My Son Is Sensitive To Hearing Certain Topics

My daughter leaps to the most dramatic interpretation so often you almost get whiplash listening to her. She is on meds now for anxiety and that has soothed this somewhat. It doesn’t have to be anything in particular, just whatever she panics about at that moment (she tends to half pay attention to conversations around her then loudly blurt out whatever word/phrase caught her attention usually getting it wrong). For example my husband will say to me “I’m not going to that restaurant again†and she will blurt out “we’re never going out to eat again????!!!!†Then we have to calm her down and take her through the logic of what we actually said etc.

It does sound like your child has a lot of empathy though and I don’t think that’s a bad thing. I mean my daughter giggles when bad things happen to people in stories so I kinda envy you.

From: autism-aspergers [mailto: autism-aspergers ] On Behalf Of JennSent: Thursday, June 09, 2011 12:26 PMTo: autism-aspergers Subject: My Son Is Sensitive To Hearing Certain Topics

I am just wondering if any of your kids blow things out of proportion when they hear certain topics? My son does not like to hear anything that has to do with someone getting hurt, the military, policemen, wars, or slavery, etc. Even if he is learning about it in school. Whenever he does, he will add things to it (that are not true, he is just assuming it's true), and completely blow it out or proportion and get upset.

For example, he is doing summer school with his Special Ed teacher (thru his online charter school). Today they were reading about slavery, and then when heard about that someone's owner did not beat them, he lost it! He said, "U mean they beat them up, and kill them?!?!" He totally melted down, and refused to read anymore. I sent his teacher a message, saying he was upset about it, and she stopped the reading.

I am just wondering if this is common for our kids to think this way? And if so, is there anyway to help them think through it differently? It seems to be getting worse as he gets older.

Thanks!Jenn

[Guest guest]

I too have a difficulty with seeing my kids having no empathy. My 7 and 12 yr old seem to have no empathy and it is hard to deal with. We have to try to teach them what empathy is and then give them the correct response that they should have or say when something happens.

From:

Sent: Thursday, June 09, 2011 3:08 PM

To: autism-aspergers

Subject: RE: My Son Is Sensitive To Hearing Certain Topics

My daughter leaps to the most dramatic interpretation so often you almost get whiplash listening to her. She is on meds now for anxiety and that has soothed this somewhat. It doesn’t have to be anything in particular, just whatever she panics about at that moment (she tends to half pay attention to conversations around her then loudly blurt out whatever word/phrase caught her attention usually getting it wrong). For example my husband will say to me “I’m not going to that restaurant again†and she will blurt out “we’re never going out to eat again????!!!!†Then we have to calm her down and take her through the logic of what we actually said etc.

It does sound like your child has a lot of empathy though and I don’t think that’s a bad thing. I mean my daughter giggles when bad things happen to people in stories so I kinda envy you.

From: autism-aspergers [mailto:autism-aspergers ] On Behalf Of JennSent: Thursday, June 09, 2011 12:26 PMTo: autism-aspergers Subject: My Son Is Sensitive To Hearing Certain Topics

I am just wondering if any of your kids blow things out of proportion when they hear certain topics? My son does not like to hear anything that has to do with someone getting hurt, the military, policemen, wars, or slavery, etc. Even if he is learning about it in school. Whenever he does, he will add things to it (that are not true, he is just assuming it's true), and completely blow it out or proportion and get upset.

For example, he is doing summer school with his Special Ed teacher (thru his online charter school). Today they were reading about slavery, and then when heard about that someone's owner did not beat them, he lost it! He said, "U mean they beat them up, and kill them?!?!" He totally melted down, and refused to read anymore. I sent his teacher a message, saying he was upset about it, and she stopped the reading.

I am just wondering if this is common for our kids to think this way? And if so, is there anyway to help them think through it differently? It seems to be getting worse as he gets older.

Thanks!Jenn

[Guest guest]

I too have a difficulty with seeing my kids having no empathy. My 7 and 12 yr old seem to have no empathy and it is hard to deal with. We have to try to teach them what empathy is and then give them the correct response that they should have or say when something happens.

From:

Sent: Thursday, June 09, 2011 3:08 PM

To: autism-aspergers

Subject: RE: My Son Is Sensitive To Hearing Certain Topics

My daughter leaps to the most dramatic interpretation so often you almost get whiplash listening to her. She is on meds now for anxiety and that has soothed this somewhat. It doesn’t have to be anything in particular, just whatever she panics about at that moment (she tends to half pay attention to conversations around her then loudly blurt out whatever word/phrase caught her attention usually getting it wrong). For example my husband will say to me “I’m not going to that restaurant again†and she will blurt out “we’re never going out to eat again????!!!!†Then we have to calm her down and take her through the logic of what we actually said etc.

It does sound like your child has a lot of empathy though and I don’t think that’s a bad thing. I mean my daughter giggles when bad things happen to people in stories so I kinda envy you.

From: autism-aspergers [mailto:autism-aspergers ] On Behalf Of JennSent: Thursday, June 09, 2011 12:26 PMTo: autism-aspergers Subject: My Son Is Sensitive To Hearing Certain Topics

I am just wondering if any of your kids blow things out of proportion when they hear certain topics? My son does not like to hear anything that has to do with someone getting hurt, the military, policemen, wars, or slavery, etc. Even if he is learning about it in school. Whenever he does, he will add things to it (that are not true, he is just assuming it's true), and completely blow it out or proportion and get upset.

For example, he is doing summer school with his Special Ed teacher (thru his online charter school). Today they were reading about slavery, and then when heard about that someone's owner did not beat them, he lost it! He said, "U mean they beat them up, and kill them?!?!" He totally melted down, and refused to read anymore. I sent his teacher a message, saying he was upset about it, and she stopped the reading.

I am just wondering if this is common for our kids to think this way? And if so, is there anyway to help them think through it differently? It seems to be getting worse as he gets older.

Thanks!Jenn

[Guest guest]

Dear Jenn,

I hope you can re-read that post with care and concern and all the insight you

can muster. Slavery still does occur. The truth cannot harm anyone. No-one.

What dignity is there in being denied the truth? Do you think perhaps your son

may have been bullied? Have you heard that people with autism have no empathy?

Does it strike you as odd that he was aghast at hearing that SOME slaves are

beaten - by the mere fact some are NOT? I have put your post and a reply to it

up for discussion at

http://www.facebook.com/note.php?created & & note_id=218637238168434 so that others

can comment over time. It is a classic case of what NOT to do to your son. If

you ever were querulous about why so many angry advocates for autism are out

there " working against " parents best practices... stop and take a look now and

see it like maybe no one else today may get to see it.

1. My son does not like to hear...someone getting hurt. Have you tried hugging

him for that outrageous normality? The flowing empathy. The spirit that

enriches us all in a way violence undoes?

2. As for blowing things out of proportion, perhaps the case is we are so

deadened to sickening violence that he compensates for our lack of horror?

Maybe, eh.

3. They still beat and kill slaves. They do. Go to

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Anti-Slavery_International and see for yourself.

Literally millions of them. Blood diamond slaves. Namib desert slaves. South

Sudanese Christian slaves by the 10's of thousands. coralled into working

gold fields. Emerald jewel diggers. Child slaves. Forced labour. It is not

wise to tell anyone a lie to insulate them. Why not begin a project with them

to end slavery instead?

4. It is not a phase or a stage. Suffering violence is a life long condition.

You know that. So why get disconcerted with the one who acutely feels that

violence and NOT the ones who are violent who caused this innocence to be harmed

in any way. Not a hair on head should be so harmed. Violence should not be

eliminated for the sake of us guilty ones, but for him surely.

5. If violence is in the news - don't tell him it won't happen to him - he is

among the most vulnerable to it! Tell him how to defend himself, how to help

bring violence to an end, something constructive, but not a lie to fuel the

violence.

6. We have a right to be a part of this world and NOT ignore the news - no

matter what it portrays. We have a right to reality. To the dignity of being

at risk, and to the ineffable dignity of protecting ourselves from violence

without the false shield of untruth.

I am not getting at you personally, I am pleading with everyone to think before

they speak hurtfulness and wrongness. I see posts above and below yours that

call us abnormal and sick and in need of termination (though they use code words

like " genetic identification " to mask what they mean... what else were they

gonna do with the genetic information? Get it framed? Build an Autists Cradle

in advance? Send the parents off for grief counselling immediately after

conception? Save up extra for velcro-closure shoes? But did they think before

they welcomed genetic advances??? We are 70 million strong us ASD people. We

DO NOT want to be the last of our kind. Period.)

Thank you for tolerating me having my say also,

Asperger's Syndrome New Zealand

info@...

www.asnz.exofire.net

Facebook = Asperger's Syndrome New Zealand

[i am a son of an Aspie, an Aspie, father of an Aspie. I am NZ Government Lived

Experience Representative on the

Ministry of Health ASD Expert Advisory Group and 11 other bodies. I work 10

hours a day to challenge the huge number of assumptions others make about autism

everyday.]

>

> *I am just wondering if any of your kids blow things out of proportion when

> they hear certain topics? My son does not like to hear anything that has to

> do with someone getting hurt, the military, policemen, wars, or slavery,

> etc. Even if he is learning about it in school. Whenever he does, he will

> add things to it (that are not true, he is just assuming it's true), and

> completely blow it out or proportion and get upset. *

> *

>

> For example, he is doing summer school with his Special Ed teacher (thru his

> online charter school). Today they were reading about slavery, and then when

> heard about that someone's owner did not beat them, he lost it! He

> said, " U mean they beat them up, and kill them?!?! " He totally melted down,

> and refused to read anymore. I sent his teacher a message, saying he was

> upset about it, and she stopped the reading.

>

> I am just wondering if this is common for our kids to think this way? And if

> so, is there anyway to help them think through it differently? It seems to

> be getting worse as he gets older.

>

> Thanks!

> Jenn*

>

[Guest guest]

It's the same at our house ! I constantly wonder why I am explaining things when he won't accept my explanation! I think you're right, if I don't explain it the way he wants to hear it, he only hears the blah blah blah part, reminds me of the way the adults talked in the Charlie Brown cartoons!! Lol

Estevan, SK

Canada

-- RE: My Son Is Sensitive To Hearing Certain Topics

My daughter leaps to the most dramatic interpretation so often you almost get whiplash listening to her. She is on meds now for anxiety and that has soothed this somewhat. It doesn’t have to be anything in particular, just whatever she panics about at that moment (she tends to half pay attention to conversations around her then loudly blurt out whatever word/phrase caught her attention usually getting it wrong). For example my husband will say to me “I’m not going to that restaurant again†and she will blurt out “we’re never going out to eat again????!!!!†Then we have to calm her down and take her through the logic of what we actually said etc.

It does sound like your child has a lot of empathy though and I don’t think that’s a bad thing. I mean my daughter giggles when bad things happen to people in stories so I kinda envy you.

From: autism-aspergers [mailto: autism-aspergers ] On Behalf Of JennSent: Thursday, June 09, 2011 12:26 PMTo: autism-aspergers Subject: My Son Is Sensitive To Hearing Certain Topics

I am just wondering if any of your kids blow things out of proportion when they hear certain topics? My son does not like to hear anything that has to do with someone getting hurt, the military, policemen, wars, or slavery, etc. Even if he is learning about it in school. Whenever he does, he will add things to it (that are not true, he is just assuming it's true), and completely blow it out or proportion and get upset.

For example, he is doing summer school with his Special Ed teacher (thru his online charter school). Today they were reading about slavery, and then when heard about that someone's owner did not beat them, he lost it! He said, "U mean they beat them up, and kill them?!?!" He totally melted down, and refused to read anymore. I sent his teacher a message, saying he was upset about it, and she stopped the reading.

I am just wondering if this is common for our kids to think this way? And if so, is there anyway to help them think through it differently? It seems to be getting worse as he gets older.

Thanks!Jenn

[Guest guest]

My son is the same way! He will sometimes ask questions, then refuse to believe my explanation. Or he will assume something is true, and believe it is true no matter what I say to him.

 

Jenn

 

It's the same at our house !  I constantly wonder why I am explaining things when he won't accept my explanation! I think you're right, if I don't explain it the way he wants to hear it, he only hears the blah blah blah part, reminds me of the way the adults talked in the Charlie Brown cartoons!!  Lol

 

Estevan, SK

Canada 

 

 

 

 

-- My Son Is Sensitive To Hearing Certain Topics

 

I am just wondering if any of your kids blow things out of proportion when they hear certain topics? My son does not like to hear anything that has to do with someone getting hurt, the military, policemen, wars, or slavery, etc. Even if he is learning about it in school. Whenever he does, he will add things to it (that are not true, he is just assuming it's true), and completely blow it out or proportion and get upset.

For example, he is doing summer school with his Special Ed teacher (thru his online charter school). Today they were reading about slavery, and then when heard about that someone's owner did not beat them, he lost it! He said, " U mean they beat them up, and kill them?!?! " He totally melted down, and refused to read anymore. I sent his teacher a message, saying he was upset about it, and she stopped the reading.

I am just wondering if this is common for our kids to think this way? And if so, is there anyway to help them think through it differently? It seems to be getting worse as he gets older.

Thanks!Jenn

 

[Guest guest]

My daughter is very much like this too! This

is why we got her a Dictionary last year for her birthday. Best present ever, because

now instead of arguing I just say “go look it up.” I think next will be a

kids encyclopedia.

S.

From: autism-aspergers [mailto:autism-aspergers ] On Behalf Of Jenn

Sent: Friday, June 10, 2011 10:11

AM

To: autism-aspergers

Subject: Re: My

Son Is Sensitive To Hearing Certain Topics

My son is the same way! He will sometimes ask

questions, then refuse to believe my explanation. Or he will assume something

is true, and believe it is true no matter what I say to him.

Jenn

On Fri, Jun 10, 2011 at 9:01 AM, wmgodfrey@...

wrote:

It's the same at our house !

I constantly wonder why I am explaining things when he won't accept my

explanation! I think you're right, if I don't explain it the way he wants to

hear it, he only hears the blah blah blah part, reminds me of the way the

adults talked in the Charlie Brown cartoons!! Lol

Estevan,

SK

Canada

-- My

Son Is Sensitive To Hearing Certain Topics

I am just wondering

if any of your kids blow things out of proportion when they hear certain

topics? My son does not like to hear anything that has to do with someone

getting hurt, the military, policemen, wars, or slavery, etc. Even if he is

learning about it in school. Whenever he does, he will add things to it (that

are not true, he is just assuming it's true), and completely blow it out or

proportion and get upset.

For example, he is doing summer school with his Special Ed teacher (thru his

online charter school). Today they were reading about slavery, and then when

heard about that someone's owner did not beat them, he lost it! He

said, " U mean they beat them up, and kill them?!?! " He totally

melted down, and refused to read anymore. I sent his teacher a message,

saying he was upset about it, and she stopped the reading.

I am just wondering

if this is common for our kids to think this way? And if so, is there anyway

to help them think through it differently? It seems to be getting worse as he

gets older.

Thanks!

Jenn