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Hey .  I'm sorry you're having a hard day.  I said a prayer for you and

hope someone will cross your path to offer some support and guidance.  I wish

you had a more supportive church.   Our church family understands our daughter,

and yet I still get embarrassed by her behavior from time to time.  Most people

are very gracious, but still it's hard.  You know what helped me?  I actually

addressed the church at a dinner one night, telling them about my fears and

anxiety about what my daughter might do.  I painted a vivid picture about what

could conceivably happen - like exiting the MENS restroom with her pants around

her knees, like grabbing food off someone's plate at a church dinner, like

running and jumping up and down the halls during Sunday school.  Just talking

about it made people smile, and people came up to me with the nicest comments

like " Madeleine can share my plate any time she wants. "   Anyway, if your church

can't

accept your daughter, a child of God, then perhaps it's time to move on.  " Let

the little children come to me, and do not stop them; for it is to such as these

that the kingdom of heaven belongs. " - Matt. 19:14.  Blessings to you and your

daughter.

 

Subject: my autistic daughter

To: Autism_in_Girls_and_Women

Date: Sunday, May 31, 2009, 1:47 PM

Do you feel sometimes like nobody in the word understanding what your family is

going through. Like you can control your childs actions. You think church would

be a place where you would get more compassion not always. I live in Superior,

WI where there is long waiting lists probably one of the worst places to live if

you have a child who is disabled. Does anyone know of services around here. I

know if we move over the bridge to Duluth, MN, we could get all the help we

would need. We recently bought a mobile home from my husbands grandfather so we

would have to try to sell it first. I am feeling very overwhelmed today and feel

as though people resent my daughter. Which hurts very deeply would appreciate

your prayers today.

-

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In a message dated 5/31/2009 7:47:12 P.M. Eastern Daylight Time,

dianneadank@... writes:

She wants to go soooo bad to be with the other kids & feel 'normal'.

Normal to me is over rated big time. I'm happy with just happy!

ive always thought normal is overrated lol. just be who you are.

eric abbys dad

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thanks, she does need more one on one attention like a home health aide to come

along side of us thanks for your encouraging words

________________________________

To: Autism_in_Girls_and_Women

Sent: Sunday, May 31, 2009 2:42:36 PM

Subject: Re: my autistic daughter

Hey .  I'm sorry you're having a hard day.  I said a prayer for you and

hope someone will cross your path to offer some support and guidance.  I wish

you had a more supportive church.   Our church family understands our daughter,

and yet I still get embarrassed by her behavior from time to time.  Most people

are very gracious, but still it's hard.  You know what helped me?  I actually

addressed the church at a dinner one night, telling them about my fears and

anxiety about what my daughter might do.  I painted a vivid picture about what

could conceivably happen - like exiting the MENS restroom with her pants around

her knees, like grabbing food off someone's plate at a church dinner, like

running and jumping up and down the halls during Sunday school.  Just talking

about it made people smile, and people came up to me with the nicest comments

like " Madeleine can share my plate any time she wants. "   Anyway, if your church

can't

accept your daughter, a child of God, then perhaps it's time to move on.  " Let

the little children come to me, and do not stop them; for it is to such as these

that the kingdom of heaven belongs. " - Matt. 19:14.  Blessings to you and your

daughter.

 

From: jenha102 <jenha102yahoo (DOT) com>

Subject: [Autism_in_Girls_ and_Women] my autistic daughter

To: Autism_in_Girls_ and_Women@ yahoogroups. com

Date: Sunday, May 31, 2009, 1:47 PM

Do you feel sometimes like nobody in the word understanding what your family is

going through. Like you can control your childs actions. You think church would

be a place where you would get more compassion not always. I live in Superior,

WI where there is long waiting lists probably one of the worst places to live if

you have a child who is disabled. Does anyone know of services around here. I

know if we move over the bridge to Duluth, MN, we could get all the help we

would need. We recently bought a mobile home from my husbands grandfather so we

would have to try to sell it first. I am feeling very overwhelmed today and feel

as though people resent my daughter. Which hurts very deeply would appreciate

your prayers today.

-

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it gets a little easier as they grow older. Hannah knows now she is to sit with

us. Later on if she wants to move over on the side and draw she can, or play

with her doll, she will be 15 this year, but still loves her barbies and

probably always will. yes, there are some in the church who do not understand

her, and i give up trying to explain, some people just cannot understand unless

they are around someone, or its a loved one. i too get embarrassed at times with

hannah. When asked to do something she doesn't she gets loud, and i have to

softly say....do not raise your voice at me, be quiet, and that usually settles

her! She is good most of the time, but there can be a day she just isn't

settled. This is why i have told them at church, its hard for me to help in alot

of things, as i can never be sure on Hannah, they look at me dumbly, and i just

say my bit and ignore their response.

Cheryl S [chez]

To: Autism_in_Girls_and_Women

From: msdickson2309@...

Date: Sun, 31 May 2009 12:42:36 -0700

Subject: Re: my autistic daughter

Hey . I'm sorry you're having a hard day. I said a prayer for you and

hope someone will cross your path to offer some support and guidance. I wish

you had a more supportive church. Our church family understands our daughter,

and yet I still get embarrassed by her behavior from time to time. Most people

are very gracious, but still it's hard. You know what helped me? I actually

addressed the church at a dinner one night, telling them about my fears and

anxiety about what my daughter might do. I painted a vivid picture about what

could conceivably happen - like exiting the MENS restroom with her pants around

her knees, like grabbing food off someone's plate at a church dinner, like

running and jumping up and down the halls during Sunday school. Just talking

about it made people smile, and people came up to me with the nicest comments

like " Madeleine can share my plate any time she wants. " Anyway, if your church

can't

accept your daughter, a child of God, then perhaps it's time to move on. " Let

the little children come to me, and do not stop them; for it is to such as these

that the kingdom of heaven belongs. " - Matt. 19:14. Blessings to you and your

daughter.

Subject: my autistic daughter

To: Autism_in_Girls_and_Women

Date: Sunday, May 31, 2009, 1:47 PM

Do you feel sometimes like nobody in the word understanding what your family is

going through. Like you can control your childs actions. You think church would

be a place where you would get more compassion not always. I live in Superior,

WI where there is long waiting lists probably one of the worst places to live if

you have a child who is disabled. Does anyone know of services around here. I

know if we move over the bridge to Duluth, MN, we could get all the help we

would need. We recently bought a mobile home from my husbands grandfather so we

would have to try to sell it first. I am feeling very overwhelmed today and feel

as though people resent my daughter. Which hurts very deeply would appreciate

your prayers today.

-

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yes, there are days i feel overwhelmed. Just thinking about the future for my

daughter is enough to send me into tears somedays. i think about the things

other kids do, and i know hannah just cannot. There is a big school trip

happening in August, down to the big city for 1 week. Noway hannah can do it

without me, for me to go, double money, 1000 dollars, i can scrape that up, but

then there is her behaviour, her food issues, just too hard. I know hannah won't

be happy and i will have major tantrum, but, sometimes you just gotta do what

you feel is best. next year if they have a trip to the snow, i may attempt that,

so she can see the snow.

Cheryl S [chez]

To: Autism_in_Girls_and_Women

From: jenha102@...

Date: Sun, 31 May 2009 18:47:59 +0000

Subject: my autistic daughter

Do you feel sometimes like nobody in the word understanding what your family is

going through. Like you can control your childs actions. You think church would

be a place where you would get more compassion not always. I live in Superior,

WI where there is long waiting lists probably one of the worst places to live if

you have a child who is disabled. Does anyone know of services around here. I

know if we move over the bridge to Duluth, MN, we could get all the help we

would need. We recently bought a mobile home from my husbands grandfather so we

would have to try to sell it first. I am feeling very overwhelmed today and feel

as though people resent my daughter. Which hurts very deeply would appreciate

your prayers today.

-

_________________________________________________________________

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HI,

I'm so sorry you are feeling overhwhelmed - I have said a quick prayer for you

to feel better.  I will definitely pray for you as you look for a new church. 

We have left our old Church (we'd been there for 7 years).  But it was pretty

much because we didn't feel they were understanding of Maddie's special needs

and my health.  When I tried to explain we couldn't do evening services - it

would upset her schedule, I would get replies of I have to teach her or I needed

to push harder or I wasn't praying and trusting in the Lord enough - sigh.  I

got to the point where I felt so guilty for doing the best I could, we finally

left.  We are still looking for another Church - the ones we have gone to have

been " nice " , but we didn't feel they really accepted Maddie or had a place where

she fit:( 

 

Rhonda

Subject: my autistic daughter

To: Autism_in_Girls_and_Women

Date: Sunday, May 31, 2009, 2:47 PM

Do you feel sometimes like nobody in the word understanding what your family is

going through. Like you can control your childs actions. You think church would

be a place where you would get more compassion not always. I live in Superior,

WI where there is long waiting lists probably one of the worst places to live if

you have a child who is disabled. Does anyone know of services around here. I

know if we move over the bridge to Duluth, MN, we could get all the help we

would need. We recently bought a mobile home from my husbands grandfather so we

would have to try to sell it first. I am feeling very overwhelmed today and feel

as though people resent my daughter. Which hurts very deeply would appreciate

your prayers today.

-

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Feeling for you Cheryl!

 Mo has a end of 6th grade trip to Cedar Point this coming week. She's never

been to Cedar Point before, and won't do roller coasters. I'm not looking

forward to a 7:00 am - 10:00 pm trip with 127 6th graders who don't know what

it's like to be overwhelmed like Mo can get. Should be happy about it, yet have

feelings she won't be able to make it that long. When Mo is done, she's 

done...time to leave. She wants to go soooo bad to be with the other kids & feel

'normal'. Normal to me is over rated big time. I'm happy with just happy!

Subject: RE: my autistic daughter

To: autism_in_girls_and_women

Date: Sunday, May 31, 2009, 6:23 PM

yes, there are days i feel overwhelmed. Just thinking about the future for my

daughter is enough to send me into tears somedays. i think about the things

other kids do, and i know hannah just cannot. There is a big school trip

happening in August, down to the big city for 1 week. Noway hannah can do it

without me, for me to go, double money, 1000 dollars, i can scrape that up, but

then there is her behaviour, her food issues, just too hard. I know hannah won't

be happy and i will have major tantrum, but, sometimes you just gotta do what

you feel is best. next year if they have a trip to the snow, i may attempt that,

so she can see the snow.

Cheryl S [chez]

To: Autism_in_Girls_ and_Women@ yahoogroups. com

From: jenha102yahoo (DOT) com

Date: Sun, 31 May 2009 18:47:59 +0000

Subject: [Autism_in_Girls_ and_Women] my autistic daughter

Do you feel sometimes like nobody in the word understanding what your family is

going through. Like you can control your childs actions. You think church would

be a place where you would get more compassion not always. I live in Superior,

WI where there is long waiting lists probably one of the worst places to live if

you have a child who is disabled. Does anyone know of services around here. I

know if we move over the bridge to Duluth, MN, we could get all the help we

would need. We recently bought a mobile home from my husbands grandfather so we

would have to try to sell it first. I am feeling very overwhelmed today and feel

as though people resent my daughter. Which hurts very deeply would appreciate

your prayers today.

-

____________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _

Looking to change your car this year? Find car news, reviews and more

http://a.ninemsn. com.au/b. aspx?URL= http%3A%2F% 2Fsecure% 2Dau%2Eimrworldw

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2Fpi%5F1004813% 2Fai%5F859641 & _t=762955845 & _r=tig_OCT07 & _m=EXT

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Hi ,

YES, I think we all feel that way sometimes. Some of us, MOST of the time.

Hang in there. Right now you're experiencing some tough times. I just said a

prayer for you and your family.

Karmen

my autistic daughter

Do you feel sometimes like nobody in the word understanding what your family

is going through. Like you can control your childs actions. You think church

would be a place where you would get more compassion not always. I live in

Superior, WI where there is long waiting lists probably one of the worst places

to live if you have a child who is disabled. Does anyone know of services around

here. I know if we move over the bridge to Duluth, MN, we could get all the help

we would need. We recently bought a mobile home from my husbands grandfather so

we would have to try to sell it first. I am feeling very overwhelmed today and

feel as though people resent my daughter. Which hurts very deeply would

appreciate your prayers today.

-

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Guest guest

, sorry about your hard time. Yes I feel that almost daily, that no one

understands and have felt the frustration with church too. Just remember if you

are in a congregation with many people over 40, those people truly don't have a

clue. They grew up in an era where " normal " was to lock away people with

disabilities, to see people with disabilities as possessed or evil. Yes it's

wrong & yes it goes against Christ's teachings. But I don't think Christ would

have spent so much time on teaching it if it came easily to the world. As He

says, no everyone who says " Lord, Lord " will enter the Kingdom. Because of that

we must all look inward to ourselves.

I know as I look inward there have been times I haven't offered the

understanding or charity to others that I should have, and it was because of my

own ignorance. You get it right now and the others don't. Honestly, I don't

think I ever would have gotten it had it not been for having a child in such a

way, which brings me shame to think I probably treated others as we are now

being treated.

Know that there are many of us who do get it, we just may not be gathered

together face-to-face but instead face-to-pixel.

Debi

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its the same with hannah, she so much wants to be the same as the other kids.

when she has to go to special Ed class, which is a little room by herself or

with a couple of others, you can see the dislike there, though she doesn't know

how to verbalise it. today with exams, she will do modified ones, and she is to

go to the library. i think there will be other kids there who have other slight

probs who will sit and do separate exams to best suit them, so at least she

won't be on her own. It must get very frustrating once it starts to click in

that they are " different "

Cheryl S [chez]

To: Autism_in_Girls_and_Women

From: dianneadank@...

Date: Sun, 31 May 2009 16:46:42 -0700

Subject: RE: my autistic daughter

Feeling for you Cheryl!

Mo has a end of 6th grade trip to Cedar Point this coming week. She's never

been to Cedar Point before, and won't do roller coasters. I'm not looking

forward to a 7:00 am - 10:00 pm trip with 127 6th graders who don't know what

it's like to be overwhelmed like Mo can get. Should be happy about it, yet have

feelings she won't be able to make it that long. When Mo is done, she's

done...time to leave. She wants to go soooo bad to be with the other kids & feel

'normal'. Normal to me is over rated big time. I'm happy with just happy!

Subject: RE: my autistic daughter

To: autism_in_girls_and_women

Date: Sunday, May 31, 2009, 6:23 PM

yes, there are days i feel overwhelmed. Just thinking about the future for my

daughter is enough to send me into tears somedays. i think about the things

other kids do, and i know hannah just cannot. There is a big school trip

happening in August, down to the big city for 1 week. Noway hannah can do it

without me, for me to go, double money, 1000 dollars, i can scrape that up, but

then there is her behaviour, her food issues, just too hard. I know hannah won't

be happy and i will have major tantrum, but, sometimes you just gotta do what

you feel is best. next year if they have a trip to the snow, i may attempt that,

so she can see the snow.

Cheryl S [chez]

To: Autism_in_Girls_ and_Women@ yahoogroups. com

From: jenha102yahoo (DOT) com

Date: Sun, 31 May 2009 18:47:59 +0000

Subject: [Autism_in_Girls_ and_Women] my autistic daughter

Do you feel sometimes like nobody in the word understanding what your family is

going through. Like you can control your childs actions. You think church would

be a place where you would get more compassion not always. I live in Superior,

WI where there is long waiting lists probably one of the worst places to live if

you have a child who is disabled. Does anyone know of services around here. I

know if we move over the bridge to Duluth, MN, we could get all the help we

would need. We recently bought a mobile home from my husbands grandfather so we

would have to try to sell it first. I am feeling very overwhelmed today and feel

as though people resent my daughter. Which hurts very deeply would appreciate

your prayers today.

-

____________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _

Looking to change your car this year? Find car news, reviews and more

http://a.ninemsn. com.au/b. aspx?URL= http%3A%2F% 2Fsecure% 2Dau%2Eimrworldw

ide%2Ecom% 2Fcgi%2Dbin% 2Fa%2Fci% 5F450304% 2Fet%5F2% 2Fcg%5F801459%

2Fpi%5F1004813% 2Fai%5F859641 & _t=762955845 & _r=tig_OCT07 & _m=EXT

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Jen, I stopped attending church after some ushers felt the need to address my H

and I in our pew about keeping our daughter quiet. We have each other and I am

pretty sure God honors the 6 of us as a church. Yeah, I know how ya feel. Like,

you can just leave your daughter at home so she doesn't inconvenience the rest

of the congregation. We can become very isolated. Our daughter is 22. I would

rather not socialize at all than have to constantly hear remarks or advise from

people who not only do not have any clue but would never even offer to walk a

few feet in our shoes. Hugs & Prayers, Aggy

" No one can make you feel inferior without your permission " ~~Elanor Roosevelt

Subject: my autistic daughter

To: Autism_in_Girls_and_Women

Date: Sunday, May 31, 2009, 2:47 PM

Do you feel sometimes like nobody in the word understanding what your family is

going through. Like you can control your childs actions. You think church would

be a place where you would get more compassion not always. I live in Superior,

WI where there is long waiting lists probably one of the worst places to live if

you have a child who is disabled. Does anyone know of services around here. I

know if we move over the bridge to Duluth, MN, we could get all the help we

would need. We recently bought a mobile home from my husbands grandfather so we

would have to try to sell it first. I am feeling very overwhelmed today and feel

as though people resent my daughter. Which hurts very deeply would appreciate

your prayers today.

-

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Share on other sites

Guest guest

yeah, i have to ignore some advice i have gotten in the past. " Oh, your daughter

likes to put her feet up on the chair infront of her " , well, so what, as long as

no one is sitting there. " Oh, its not really ladylike " ....well, my daughter

thinks as a 6 year old, whats ladylike about that!

i always make sure she is in pants or shorts, she is not a dress person, and if

she ever wishes to wear one i will make sure she has tights or something

underneath, as she likes to spread her legs and relax! some people just

aggravate me, they really do!!

Cheryl S [chez]

To: Autism_in_Girls_and_Women

From: xceptionalrec@...

Date: Sun, 31 May 2009 20:12:51 -0700

Subject: Re: my autistic daughter

Jen, I stopped attending church after some ushers felt the need to address my H

and I in our pew about keeping our daughter quiet. We have each other and I am

pretty sure God honors the 6 of us as a church. Yeah, I know how ya feel. Like,

you can just leave your daughter at home so she doesn't inconvenience the rest

of the congregation. We can become very isolated. Our daughter is 22. I would

rather not socialize at all than have to constantly hear remarks or advise from

people who not only do not have any clue but would never even offer to walk a

few feet in our shoes. Hugs & Prayers, Aggy

" No one can make you feel inferior without your permission " ~~Elanor Roosevelt

Subject: my autistic daughter

To: Autism_in_Girls_and_Women

Date: Sunday, May 31, 2009, 2:47 PM

Do you feel sometimes like nobody in the word understanding what your family is

going through. Like you can control your childs actions. You think church would

be a place where you would get more compassion not always. I live in Superior,

WI where there is long waiting lists probably one of the worst places to live if

you have a child who is disabled. Does anyone know of services around here. I

know if we move over the bridge to Duluth, MN, we could get all the help we

would need. We recently bought a mobile home from my husbands grandfather so we

would have to try to sell it first. I am feeling very overwhelmed today and feel

as though people resent my daughter. Which hurts very deeply would appreciate

your prayers today.

-

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Share on other sites

Guest guest

I wish the was the only thing she did if she was upstairs during worship she

would be all over the place getting into everything. She is on like a two year

old learning level like a big toddler. We  have a small church and she is in the

infant and toddler room. She has behavior problems like hitting, haulering,

knocking on doors and she keeps  wanting to shut the lights off. We are in

desperate need of a home health aide but, unless we want to wait until God knows

when we have to move to Minnesota no waiting lists, and better programs for

disabled children. But, we bought a mobile home  from my husbands grandfather so

we have to fix it up and sell it first. We are hoping to be in  Minnesota before

school starts. The funny thing is I grew up in Minnesota which Superior,  WI is

right over the bridge  and the cost of living is so much cheaper when we moved

here we had not kids. So prayerfully moving on to bigger and better things for

our whole family!

Jen

________________________________

To: autism_in_girls_and_women

Sent: Sunday, May 31, 2009 10:17:21 PM

Subject: RE: my autistic daughter

yeah, i have to ignore some advice i have gotten in the past. " Oh, your daughter

likes to put her feet up on the chair infront of her " , well, so what, as long as

no one is sitting there. " Oh, its not really ladylike " ... .well, my daughter

thinks as a 6 year old, whats ladylike about that!

i always make sure she is in pants or shorts, she is not a dress person, and if

she ever wishes to wear one i will make sure she has tights or something

underneath, as she likes to spread her legs and relax! some people just

aggravate me, they really do!!

Cheryl S [chez]

To: Autism_in_Girls_ and_Women@ yahoogroups. com

From: xceptionalrec@ yahoo.com

Date: Sun, 31 May 2009 20:12:51 -0700

Subject: Re: [Autism_in_Girls_ and_Women] my autistic daughter

Jen, I stopped attending church after some ushers felt the need to address my H

and I in our pew about keeping our daughter quiet. We have each other and I am

pretty sure God honors the 6 of us as a church. Yeah, I know how ya feel. Like,

you can just leave your daughter at home so she doesn't inconvenience the rest

of the congregation. We can become very isolated. Our daughter is 22. I would

rather not socialize at all than have to constantly hear remarks or advise from

people who not only do not have any clue but would never even offer to walk a

few feet in our shoes. Hugs & Prayers, Aggy

" No one can make you feel inferior without your permission " ~ ~Elanor Roosevelt

From: jenha102 <jenha102yahoo (DOT) com>

Subject: [Autism_in_Girls_ and_Women] my autistic daughter

To: Autism_in_Girls_ and_Women@ yahoogroups. com

Date: Sunday, May 31, 2009, 2:47 PM

Do you feel sometimes like nobody in the word understanding what your family is

going through. Like you can control your childs actions. You think church would

be a place where you would get more compassion not always. I live in Superior,

WI where there is long waiting lists probably one of the worst places to live if

you have a child who is disabled. Does anyone know of services around here. I

know if we move over the bridge to Duluth, MN, we could get all the help we

would need. We recently bought a mobile home from my husbands grandfather so we

would have to try to sell it first. I am feeling very overwhelmed today and feel

as though people resent my daughter. Which hurts very deeply would appreciate

your prayers today.

-

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Share on other sites

Guest guest

Ya,  I wish some of you  people lived closer  to me. I have never seen anyone

with as severe Autism as my  little girl, I have only heard about it. It would

be nice to know what we can expect.

Jen

________________________________

To: Autism_in_Girls_and_Women

Sent: Sunday, May 31, 2009 10:12:51 PM

Subject: Re: my autistic daughter

Jen, I stopped attending church after some ushers felt the need to address my H

and I in our pew about keeping our daughter quiet. We have each other and I am

pretty sure God honors the 6 of us as a church. Yeah, I know how ya feel. Like,

you can just leave your daughter at home so she doesn't inconvenience the rest

of the congregation. We can become very isolated. Our daughter is 22. I would

rather not socialize at all than have to constantly hear remarks or advise from

people who not only do not have any clue but would never even offer to walk a

few feet in our shoes. Hugs & Prayers, Aggy

" No one can make you feel inferior without your permission " ~ ~Elanor Roosevelt

From: jenha102 <jenha102yahoo (DOT) com>

Subject: [Autism_in_Girls_ and_Women] my autistic daughter

To: Autism_in_Girls_ and_Women@ yahoogroups. com

Date: Sunday, May 31, 2009, 2:47 PM

Do you feel sometimes like nobody in the word understanding what your family is

going through. Like you can control your childs actions. You think church would

be a place where you would get more compassion not always. I live in Superior,

WI where there is long waiting lists probably one of the worst places to live if

you have a child who is disabled. Does anyone know of services around here. I

know if we move over the bridge to Duluth, MN, we could get all the help we

would need. We recently bought a mobile home from my husbands grandfather so we

would have to try to sell it first. I am feeling very overwhelmed today and feel

as though people resent my daughter. Which hurts very deeply would appreciate

your prayers today.

-

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yes, I agree sometimes she just wants to be accepted

________________________________

To: autism_in_girls_and_women

Sent: Sunday, May 31, 2009 10:11:57 PM

Subject: RE: my autistic daughter

its the same with hannah, she so much wants to be the same as the other kids.

when she has to go to special Ed class, which is a little room by herself or

with a couple of others, you can see the dislike there, though she doesn't know

how to verbalise it. today with exams, she will do modified ones, and she is to

go to the library. i think there will be other kids there who have other slight

probs who will sit and do separate exams to best suit them, so at least she

won't be on her own. It must get very frustrating once it starts to click in

that they are " different "

Cheryl S [chez]

To: Autism_in_Girls_ and_Women@ yahoogroups. com

From: dianneadank@ yahoo.com

Date: Sun, 31 May 2009 16:46:42 -0700

Subject: RE: [Autism_in_Girls_ and_Women] my autistic daughter

Feeling for you Cheryl!

Mo has a end of 6th grade trip to Cedar Point this coming week. She's never been

to Cedar Point before, and won't do roller coasters. I'm not looking forward to

a 7:00 am - 10:00 pm trip with 127 6th graders who don't know what it's like to

be overwhelmed like Mo can get. Should be happy about it, yet have feelings she

won't be able to make it that long. When Mo is done, she's done...time to leave.

She wants to go soooo bad to be with the other kids & feel 'normal'. Normal to

me is over rated big time. I'm happy with just happy!

From: Cheryl Sommerfeld <cmsommerfeld@ hotmail.com>

Subject: RE: [Autism_in_Girls_ and_Women] my autistic daughter

To: autism_in_girls_ and_women@ yahoogroups. com

Date: Sunday, May 31, 2009, 6:23 PM

yes, there are days i feel overwhelmed. Just thinking about the future for my

daughter is enough to send me into tears somedays. i think about the things

other kids do, and i know hannah just cannot. There is a big school trip

happening in August, down to the big city for 1 week. Noway hannah can do it

without me, for me to go, double money, 1000 dollars, i can scrape that up, but

then there is her behaviour, her food issues, just too hard. I know hannah won't

be happy and i will have major tantrum, but, sometimes you just gotta do what

you feel is best. next year if they have a trip to the snow, i may attempt that,

so she can see the snow.

Cheryl S [chez]

To: Autism_in_Girls_ and_Women@ yahoogroups. com

From: jenha102yahoo (DOT) com

Date: Sun, 31 May 2009 18:47:59 +0000

Subject: [Autism_in_Girls_ and_Women] my autistic daughter

Do you feel sometimes like nobody in the word understanding what your family is

going through. Like you can control your childs actions. You think church would

be a place where you would get more compassion not always. I live in Superior,

WI where there is long waiting lists probably one of the worst places to live if

you have a child who is disabled. Does anyone know of services around here. I

know if we move over the bridge to Duluth, MN, we could get all the help we

would need. We recently bought a mobile home from my husbands grandfather so we

would have to try to sell it first. I am feeling very overwhelmed today and feel

as though people resent my daughter. Which hurts very deeply would appreciate

your prayers today.

-

____________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _

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Ya, it really opened up my eyes. I don't know if I would have been that

insensitive, but because of this I am humbled. She is on like a 2 year old

learning level so she is like a big toddler.

Jen

________________________________

To: Autism_in_Girls_and_Women

Sent: Sunday, May 31, 2009 9:52:23 PM

Subject: Re: my autistic daughter

, sorry about your hard time. Yes I feel that almost daily, that no one

understands and have felt the frustration with church too. Just remember if you

are in a congregation with many people over 40, those people truly don't have a

clue. They grew up in an era where " normal " was to lock away people with

disabilities, to see people with disabilities as possessed or evil. Yes it's

wrong & yes it goes against Christ's teachings. But I don't think Christ would

have spent so much time on teaching it if it came easily to the world. As He

says, no everyone who says " Lord, Lord " will enter the Kingdom. Because of that

we must all look inward to ourselves.

I know as I look inward there have been times I haven't offered the

understanding or charity to others that I should have, and it was because of my

own ignorance. You get it right now and the others don't. Honestly, I don't

think I ever would have gotten it had it not been for having a child in such a

way, which brings me shame to think I probably treated others as we are now

being treated.

Know that there are many of us who do get it, we just may not be gathered

together face-to-face but instead face-to-pixel.

Debi

-

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thank you

________________________________

To: Autism_in_Girls_and_Women

Sent: Sunday, May 31, 2009 8:55:18 PM

Subject: Re: my autistic daughter

Hi ,

YES, I think we all feel that way sometimes. Some of us, MOST of the time. Hang

in there. Right now you're experiencing some tough times. I just said a prayer

for you and your family.

Karmen

[Autism_in_Girls_ and_Women] my autistic daughter

Do you feel sometimes like nobody in the word understanding what your family is

going through. Like you can control your childs actions. You think church would

be a place where you would get more compassion not always. I live in Superior,

WI where there is long waiting lists probably one of the worst places to live if

you have a child who is disabled. Does anyone know of services around here. I

know if we move over the bridge to Duluth, MN, we could get all the help we

would need. We recently bought a mobile home from my husbands grandfather so we

would have to try to sell it first. I am feeling very overwhelmed today and feel

as though people resent my daughter. Which hurts very deeply would appreciate

your prayers today.

-

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Share on other sites

Guest guest

boy oh boy we get a lot of snow here in WI.

________________________________

To: autism_in_girls_and_women

Sent: Sunday, May 31, 2009 5:23:28 PM

Subject: RE: my autistic daughter

yes, there are days i feel overwhelmed. Just thinking about the future for my

daughter is enough to send me into tears somedays. i think about the things

other kids do, and i know hannah just cannot. There is a big school trip

happening in August, down to the big city for 1 week. Noway hannah can do it

without me, for me to go, double money, 1000 dollars, i can scrape that up, but

then there is her behaviour, her food issues, just too hard. I know hannah won't

be happy and i will have major tantrum, but, sometimes you just gotta do what

you feel is best. next year if they have a trip to the snow, i may attempt that,

so she can see the snow.

Cheryl S [chez]

To: Autism_in_Girls_ and_Women@ yahoogroups. com

From: jenha102yahoo (DOT) com

Date: Sun, 31 May 2009 18:47:59 +0000

Subject: [Autism_in_Girls_ and_Women] my autistic daughter

Do you feel sometimes like nobody in the word understanding what your family is

going through. Like you can control your childs actions. You think church would

be a place where you would get more compassion not always. I live in Superior,

WI where there is long waiting lists probably one of the worst places to live if

you have a child who is disabled. Does anyone know of services around here. I

know if we move over the bridge to Duluth, MN, we could get all the help we

would need. We recently bought a mobile home from my husbands grandfather so we

would have to try to sell it first. I am feeling very overwhelmed today and feel

as though people resent my daughter. Which hurts very deeply would appreciate

your prayers today.

-

____________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _

Looking to change your car this year? Find car news, reviews and more

http://a.ninemsn. com.au/b. aspx?URL= http%3A%2F% 2Fsecure% 2Dau%2Eimrworldw

ide%2Ecom% 2Fcgi%2Dbin% 2Fa%2Fci% 5F450304% 2Fet%5F2% 2Fcg%5F801459%

2Fpi%5F1004813% 2Fai%5F859641 & _t=762955845 & _r=tig_OCT07 & _m=EXT

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Guest guest

jennifer I to have of autism and feel this way much of the time. there are of

days I can be of to embrace of the autism and who I to be and other days I to

hate of autism and wish did not exist in this life. I to feel that way more than

embrace of it , but for me like of you it is of due to lack of supports to me as

a adult person of autism. I to be of have a meeting with the heads of MRDD and

my psychologist and a strong parent advocate on the 15 to present of my case to

them. It was of the first time I to actually maked of copies of my mental health

records and allowed any to view of them. My psychologist and me reviewed of them

and I to blacked out what things i to not wanted of my family and things shared

off each page of my record. Then I to maked a copy for him and for me.

I to be fo feeling hopeful that this meeting can show of a long history of the

many crisis levels of me since being of age of 13. much of my records shared was

of a constant challenge behaviorally for the wards.... they tried of to treat of

me with antipsychotics to so call rid of me of the psychosis things but I to in

reality never had of a true psychosis so that is of why no medicines worked.

but anyways I to be of still struggling as it isof hard day to day and I to not

even have of any family members who over see of my best interest or care....

My over all development in most areas of my life is of estimated to be more

around that of a 8-10 year old in many areas except in my interest and scripted

areas which can be to appear much more advanced. I to get easily overwhelmed

because people see of one parts of me and assume that all of me matches up and

places false expectations to me that causes me to emotionally crash in this

life.

but anyways happy you are of here and hope that you will find this list a

supportive helpful list for you,.

sondra

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Jen, Katy is 22 now. Her behaviors range from about 10-18. Her intellectual

understanding is closer to 15-22. Her emotional maturity ranges from 10-22.. It

gets easier. We were very fortunate that Katy never had physical impairments.

She looks like any normal young lady. Her interactions are different and for

those who know us, it is easier to accept. For those who don't, I sometimes have

to run interference but Katy is getting better about explaining herself, too.

She has actually matured alot since she had Bella. She has great insight into

realizing that Bella will need her to be a good role-model. She also knows when

she is not able to provide the support Bella needs and she will ask me to help

her. She has been extremely mature in accepting that her B/F is not stable

enough to be around her and Bella. I had worried that she would be more

self-centered and want to resume the relationship at any cost but instead, she

has put Bella's upbringing ahead

of her own emotional and physical desires and I am beyond proud of her for such

an adult decision. Don't get me wrong, it is still very hard to face our

community but they do not know our lives and they have no right to judge us.

This is a very lonely journey. It would be nice to have more community support

and I envy those who find it. Ohio is also very laxed in disability support but

it varies from county to county. I wish you many blessing in finding a new

community to settle in. ~~~Aggy 

" No one can make you feel inferior without your permission " ~~Elanor Roosevelt

From: jenha102 <jenha102yahoo (DOT) com>

Subject: [Autism_in_Girls_ and_Women] my autistic daughter

To: Autism_in_Girls_ and_Women@ yahoogroups. com

Date: Sunday, May 31, 2009, 2:47 PM

Do you feel sometimes like nobody in the word understanding what your family is

going through. Like you can control your childs actions. You think church would

be a place where you would get more compassion not always. I live in Superior,

WI where there is long waiting lists probably one of the worst places to live if

you have a child who is disabled. Does anyone know of services around here. I

know if we move over the bridge to Duluth, MN, we could get all the help we

would need. We recently bought a mobile home from my husbands grandfather so we

would have to try to sell it first. I am feeling very overwhelmed today and feel

as though people resent my daughter. Which hurts very deeply would appreciate

your prayers today.

-

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Guest guest

That is encouraging you seem like a strong woman. So do you have home health

care or does she not need it?  My daughter Madison looks like a normal  kid but

her speech is very poor, she also has low muscle tone in her lower jar which

would not be noticable except she drools a little bit. So how  was it when she

was a child?

Jen

________________________________

To: Autism_in_Girls_and_Women

Sent: Monday, June 1, 2009 12:50:08 PM

Subject: Re: my autistic daughter

Jen, Katy is 22 now. Her behaviors range from about 10-18. Her intellectual

understanding is closer to 15-22. Her emotional maturity ranges from 10-22.. It

gets easier. We were very fortunate that Katy never had physical impairments.

She looks like any normal young lady. Her interactions are different and for

those who know us, it is easier to accept. For those who don't, I sometimes have

to run interference but Katy is getting better about explaining herself, too.

She has actually matured alot since she had Bella. She has great insight into

realizing that Bella will need her to be a good role-model. She also knows when

she is not able to provide the support Bella needs and she will ask me to help

her. She has been extremely mature in accepting that her B/F is not stable

enough to be around her and Bella. I had worried that she would be more

self-centered and want to resume the relationship at any cost but instead, she

has put Bella's upbringing ahead

of her own emotional and physical desires and I am beyond proud of her for such

an adult decision. Don't get me wrong, it is still very hard to face our

community but they do not know our lives and they have no right to judge us.

This is a very lonely journey. It would be nice to have more community support

and I envy those who find it. Ohio is also very laxed in disability support but

it varies from county to county. I wish you many blessing in finding a new

community to settle in. ~~~Aggy 

" No one can make you feel inferior without your permission " ~ ~Elanor Roosevelt

From: jenha102 <jenha102yahoo (DOT) com>

Subject: [Autism_in_Girls_ and_Women] my autistic daughter

To: Autism_in_Girls_ and_Women@ yahoogroups. com

Date: Sunday, May 31, 2009, 2:47 PM

Do you feel sometimes like nobody in the word understanding what your family is

going through. Like you can control your childs actions. You think church would

be a place where you would get more compassion not always. I live in Superior,

WI where there is long waiting lists probably one of the worst places to live if

you have a child who is disabled. Does anyone know of services around here. I

know if we move over the bridge to Duluth, MN, we could get all the help we

would need. We recently bought a mobile home from my husbands grandfather so we

would have to try to sell it first. I am feeling very overwhelmed today and feel

as though people resent my daughter. Which hurts very deeply would appreciate

your prayers today.

-

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As a child, she had no usable language except for the word " NO " which she used

for every response, even if she meant " yes " . In school, she began to mimic her

peers which usually had more negative responses than good ones. Around 12 she

began to use whole sentences. They were usually mimicked from a cartoon or

movie. Then, gradually, she began to use the mimicked words to build meaningful

sentences but it took time and did not always come out the way she wanted it to.

Both of her brothers are " normal " and have IQ's over 128. One is quiet, like my

husband. The other is chatty, like me. Katy is very smart and she understands

way more than she can communicate. She gets frustrated easily though but I am

proud that she doesn't give up. Just offer your daughter great support,

encouragement, examples, and love. She will be the best she can be. ~~~Aggy

" No one can make you feel inferior without your permission " ~~Elanor Roosevelt

From: jenha102 <jenha102yahoo (DOT) com>

Subject: [Autism_in_Girls_ and_Women] my autistic daughter

To: Autism_in_Girls_ and_Women@ yahoogroups. com

Date: Sunday, May 31, 2009, 2:47 PM

Do you feel sometimes like nobody in the word understanding what your family is

going through. Like you can control your childs actions. You think church would

be a place where you would get more compassion not always. I live in Superior,

WI where there is long waiting lists probably one of the worst places to live if

you have a child who is disabled. Does anyone know of services around here. I

know if we move over the bridge to Duluth, MN, we could get all the help we

would need. We recently bought a mobile home from my husbands grandfather so we

would have to try to sell it first. I am feeling very overwhelmed today and feel

as though people resent my daughter. Which hurts very deeply would appreciate

your prayers today.

-

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Hi -

You are in my thoughts & prayers.

Pat

Subject: my autistic daughter

To: Autism_in_Girls_and_Women

Date: Sunday, May 31, 2009, 11:47 AM

Do you feel sometimes like nobody in the word understanding what your family is

going through. Like you can control your childs actions. You think church would

be a place where you would get more compassion not always. I live in Superior,

WI where there is long waiting lists probably one of the worst places to live if

you have a child who is disabled. Does anyone know of services around here. I

know if we move over the bridge to Duluth, MN, we could get all the help we

would need. We recently bought a mobile home from my husbands grandfather so we

would have to try to sell it first. I am feeling very overwhelmed today and feel

as though people resent my daughter. Which hurts very deeply would appreciate

your prayers today.

-

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Share on other sites

Guest guest

thank you

________________________________

To: Autism_in_Girls_and_Women

Sent: Tuesday, June 2, 2009 8:59:18 AM

Subject: Re: my autistic daughter

Hi -

You are in my thoughts & prayers.

Pat

From: jenha102 <jenha102yahoo (DOT) com>

Subject: [Autism_in_Girls_ and_Women] my autistic daughter

To: Autism_in_Girls_ and_Women@ yahoogroups. com

Date: Sunday, May 31, 2009, 11:47 AM

Do you feel sometimes like nobody in the word understanding what your family is

going through. Like you can control your childs actions. You think church would

be a place where you would get more compassion not always. I live in Superior,

WI where there is long waiting lists probably one of the worst places to live if

you have a child who is disabled. Does anyone know of services around here. I

know if we move over the bridge to Duluth, MN, we could get all the help we

would need. We recently bought a mobile home from my husbands grandfather so we

would have to try to sell it first. I am feeling very overwhelmed today and feel

as though people resent my daughter. Which hurts very deeply would appreciate

your prayers today.

-

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