Need a kick in the pants!!

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Hi

I am on week 6 and have struggled throughout the program to make it

all week without binging. The first 3 weeks I did great, didn't

cheat once. I go clean for 5 days and then Friday night through

Sunday I bindge like crazy. I've been keeping up with my workouts

but struggle so much with food. I'm going to try to really really

step it up with my commitment to eating clean but I'm so worried I

ruined everything. My clothes are getting tighter! and that is so

opposite of what I want. Do some people get bigger and then have a

sudden melting point at the end of the program? I'm 6 weeks into

this and really concerned I'm bulking up and that even if I eat

clean for the next 6 weeks, I'll be bigger not smaller. I am 5 " 1

and it's so easy for me to get bulky because of my compact muscles.

I need a kick in the pants...someone please tell me the bulking is

temporary! I am going to skip my free days for the next 6 weeks and

pray I look like the after pics in the BFL books I so desire to look

like! HELP...someone give me hope and a swift reality kick

thanks for letting me ramble!!