Re: schools and decisions - Sara

[Guest guest]

Sara, this is so much like last year, could not say what was

wrong, used to say instead of me all the time, no play, no

initiation of conversation, no friends at nursery. This has turned

around and I am thinking because Tom can read, can he learn through

reading? can you write a story about him where he l;earns to say me

instead of Tom, or the day I learnt to ask to go to the toilet? I

know responds better to written word rather than verbal.

I am lucky he also went to a great nursery with a great senco, who

gave him lots of her time, his new school is calm and in a really good

structured routine. It will be interesting to see how he gets on.

It does worry me so much still, as he is a follower, but they have 7

play ground assistants at dinner time and who organise games and

structured play, a friendship stop where you go to if you have no one

to play with, wooden play ground and tables and chairs to do board

games or puzzles.

we will see, no doubt I will be asking listmates for advice soon

Lara xxx

> > >

> > > Hi to everyone having this discussion.

> > > I am also agonizing over Tom being due to start school soon but

> I am

> > > trying to make my mind up between mainstream and home ed.

> > > For those of you out there doing home ed. Where do you find kids

> for

> > > play dates or socialization? Tom has very successful playdates

> with

> > one

> > > little girl (who hasn't turned up today!) but other than that I'm

> > > struggling and have even lost a friend over this. (long story).

> > There

> > > are no home ed groups in Plymouth or Steiner schools or

> Montessori

> > but

> > > there is a Steiner school and a lot of home ed. groups about 40

> mins

> > > away in Totnes. Tom goes to pre-school and we've managed to keep

> him

> > > there for one more term (the one about to start) and I'm hoping

> to

> > > entice one mum in particular into coming round, but it's very

> hard

> > to

> > > set up a regular thing with someone you don't know!

> > > By the way, mainstream probably isn't going to happen because

> the

> > lovely

> > > LEA talked the primary school out of allowing our VB therapist

> into

> > > school. They did the same in another school for another family

> and

> > so I

> > > assume they would do the same with any school we might find. Tom

> is

> > NOT

> > > ready for mainstream with a TA or alone.

> > > Do you all just happen to have accommodating friends with

> children

> > of

> > > the right age? Or do you struggle too? Or is there a way round

> this?

> > >

> > >

> > > To Sue, I agree with you that the unit for autism sounds

> worrying.

> > All I

> > > can say to you though is to follow your instincts. Would you

> > consider

> > > home ed? or Montessori/ Steiner? Do you run any sort of home

> > programme

> > > like Sonrise/ VB/ ABA/ RDI? All very expensive and difficult to

> run

> > but

> > > they give you something positive to do with your child and also

> > respite

> > > if you can pay for therapists or get volunteers (or get funding

> > which is

> > > usually not easy).

> > > Just a few thoughts and questions. Hope lots of people add their

> > > opinions here as this is all obviously very difficult territory

> for

> > all

> > > our kids.

> > > SARA

> > >

> > >

> > >

> > >

> > > Re: Jane/Peta, mainstream

> pre-

> > school

> > > was:friend's baby reacted to vaCcines

> > >

> > >

> > > I am finding it really interesting hearing about everyone's

> > > experiences of deciding between mainstream or special needs

> > nursery.

> > > Kieran has so far been in a mainstream school, but within a

> > > supported/resourced group or classroom. This is his last year of

> > the

> > > resourced classroom, and we need to find a junior school

> placement

> > > for Sept 09. The local catholic special needs school is having

> an

> > > ASD specific class from Sept 08, but when we spoke to one of the

> > > teachers they did not seem to be very clued up on how they were

> > going

> > > to handle integration with the rest of the school, and how they

> > would

> > > meet specific needs such as socialisation at playtime. He seemed

> > > impressed that Kieran did not appear so far to have any major

> > > generalized learnng difficulty, but when we explained that he

> just

> > > does not look to other children to socialize or even communicate

> he

> > > seemed at a loss. Rather worrying when they are having an ASD

> > > specific resource.

> > > His younger brother's school is a large very busy school with a

> lot

> > > of boisterous activity - Kieran would not cope at all. Instead

> we

> > > have arranged with another local primary for Kieran to attend on

> > one

> > > afternoon per week from October till Christmas. If he and they

> > > manage and feel it will be succesful, we are going to try and

> get

> > his

> > > statement to reflect a split placement from Jan to July. There

> are

> > > only 21 kids in the class, and they have been described as very

> > > polite and well-behaved. Wow.

> > > So far we are hoping that this mainstream placement with support

> > will

> > > work out, but if it doesn't, then we may need to rely on the

> > special

> > > school. In October we are going to ask for a visit to the new

> > > premises and to meet the new headteacher and the ASD class-

> teacher-

> > > hopefully they may be more clued up than the preveious teacher

> we

> > > spoke to. I am really worried about making the wrong choice, and

> > > having a very unhappy little boy.

> > > Sue

> > >

> >

>

[Guest guest]

It would be good if we lived nearer, we could all meet & spend time

time together.

I just feel optimistic for Tom , having met him in London, he so

reminded us of . He is a great little guy, you've done so well,

still more progress on its way I am sure.

Lara x

> > > >

> > > > Hi to everyone having this discussion.

> > > > I am also agonizing over Tom being due to start school soon but

> > I am

> > > > trying to make my mind up between mainstream and home ed.

> > > > For those of you out there doing home ed. Where do you find kids

> > for

> > > > play dates or socialization? Tom has very successful playdates

> > with

> > > one

> > > > little girl (who hasn't turned up today!) but other than that I'm

> > > > struggling and have even lost a friend over this. (long story).

> > > There

> > > > are no home ed groups in Plymouth or Steiner schools or

> > Montessori

> > > but

> > > > there is a Steiner school and a lot of home ed. groups about 40

> > mins

> > > > away in Totnes. Tom goes to pre-school and we've managed to keep

> > him

> > > > there for one more term (the one about to start) and I'm hoping

> > to

> > > > entice one mum in particular into coming round, but it's very

> > hard

> > > to

> > > > set up a regular thing with someone you don't know!

> > > > By the way, mainstream probably isn't going to happen because

> > the

> > > lovely

> > > > LEA talked the primary school out of allowing our VB therapist

> > into

> > > > school. They did the same in another school for another family

> > and

> > > so I

> > > > assume they would do the same with any school we might find. Tom

> > is

> > > NOT

> > > > ready for mainstream with a TA or alone.

> > > > Do you all just happen to have accommodating friends with

> > children

> > > of

> > > > the right age? Or do you struggle too? Or is there a way round

> > this?

> > > >

> > > >

> > > > To Sue, I agree with you that the unit for autism sounds

> > worrying.

> > > All I

> > > > can say to you though is to follow your instincts. Would you

> > > consider

> > > > home ed? or Montessori/ Steiner? Do you run any sort of home

> > > programme

> > > > like Sonrise/ VB/ ABA/ RDI? All very expensive and difficult to

> > run

> > > but

> > > > they give you something positive to do with your child and also

> > > respite

> > > > if you can pay for therapists or get volunteers (or get funding

> > > which is

> > > > usually not easy).

> > > > Just a few thoughts and questions. Hope lots of people add their

> > > > opinions here as this is all obviously very difficult territory

> > for

> > > all

> > > > our kids.

> > > > SARA

> > > >

> > > >

> > > >

> > > >

> > > > Re: Jane/Peta, mainstream

> > pre-

> > > school

> > > > was:friend's baby reacted to vaCcines

> > > >

> > > >

> > > > I am finding it really interesting hearing about everyone's

> > > > experiences of deciding between mainstream or special needs

> > > nursery.

> > > > Kieran has so far been in a mainstream school, but within a

> > > > supported/resourced group or classroom. This is his last year of

> > > the

> > > > resourced classroom, and we need to find a junior school

> > placement

> > > > for Sept 09. The local catholic special needs school is having

> > an

> > > > ASD specific class from Sept 08, but when we spoke to one of the

> > > > teachers they did not seem to be very clued up on how they were

> > > going

> > > > to handle integration with the rest of the school, and how they

> > > would

> > > > meet specific needs such as socialisation at playtime. He seemed

> > > > impressed that Kieran did not appear so far to have any major

> > > > generalized learnng difficulty, but when we explained that he

> > just

> > > > does not look to other children to socialize or even communicate

> > he

> > > > seemed at a loss. Rather worrying when they are having an ASD

> > > > specific resource.

> > > > His younger brother's school is a large very busy school with a

> > lot

> > > > of boisterous activity - Kieran would not cope at all. Instead

> > we

> > > > have arranged with another local primary for Kieran to attend on

> > > one

> > > > afternoon per week from October till Christmas. If he and they

> > > > manage and feel it will be succesful, we are going to try and

> > get

> > > his

> > > > statement to reflect a split placement from Jan to July. There

> > are

> > > > only 21 kids in the class, and they have been described as very

> > > > polite and well-behaved. Wow.

> > > > So far we are hoping that this mainstream placement with support

> > > will

> > > > work out, but if it doesn't, then we may need to rely on the

> > > special

> > > > school. In October we are going to ask for a visit to the new

> > > > premises and to meet the new headteacher and the ASD class-

> > teacher-

> > > > hopefully they may be more clued up than the preveious teacher

> > we

> > > > spoke to. I am really worried about making the wrong choice, and

> > > > having a very unhappy little boy.

> > > > Sue

> > > >

> > >

> >

>

[Guest guest]

Thanks

for all that Lara,

I

don’t think Tom is like last year because he is not ready for such

complex language. He wouldn’t understand stories about him learning to

say ‘me’ instead of ‘Tom’ or any stories. He doesn’t

refer to himself even as Tom. He just doesn’t refer to himself at all. He

mixes all his pronouns up and says things like ‘it’s hungry’

or ‘do you want a biscuit?’ when he’s hungry or wants a

biscuit.

He

wouldn’t be able to join in with any organised games or structured play

and wouldn’t want to go to the friendship stop because he doesn’t

like children.

I

think he’s probably not ready and I’m probably going to go with

home ed. and not battling with the school or LEA. Anyway, I’m off to find

some children for him to ‘socialise’ with (whatever that means as

Nina put it).

SARA

-----Original

Message-----

From: Autism-Biomedical-Europe

[mailto:Autism-Biomedical-Europe ] On Behalf Of Lara

Sent: 29 August 2007 23:26

To:

Autism-Biomedical-Europe

Subject:

Re: schools and decisions - Sara

Sara, this is so much like last year, could not say what was

wrong, used to say instead of me all the time, no play, no

initiation of conversation, no friends at nursery. This has turned

around and I am thinking because Tom can read, can he learn through

reading? can you write a story about him where he l;earns to say me

instead of Tom, or the day I learnt to ask to go to the toilet? I

know responds better to written word rather than verbal.

I am lucky he also went to a great nursery with a great senco, who

gave him lots of her time, his new school is calm and in a really good

structured routine. It will be interesting to see how he gets on.

It does worry me so much still, as he is a follower, but they have 7

play ground assistants at dinner time and who organise games and

structured play, a friendship stop where you go to if you have no one

to play with, wooden play ground and tables and chairs to do board

games or puzzles.

we will see, no doubt I will be asking listmates for advice soon

Lara xxx

> > >

> > > Hi to everyone having this discussion.

> > > I am also agonizing over Tom being due to start school soon but

> I am

> > > trying to make my mind up between mainstream and home ed.

> > > For those of you out there doing home ed. Where do you find kids

> for

> > > play dates or socialization? Tom has very successful playdates

> with

> > one

> > > little girl (who hasn't turned up today!) but other than that

I'm

> > > struggling and have even lost a friend over this. (long story).

> > There

> > > are no home ed groups in Plymouth or Steiner schools or

> Montessori

> > but

> > > there is a Steiner school and a lot of home ed. groups about 40

> mins

> > > away in Totnes. Tom goes to pre-school and we've managed to keep

> him

> > > there for one more term (the one about to start) and I'm hoping

> to

> > > entice one mum in particular into coming round, but it's very

> hard

> > to

> > > set up a regular thing with someone you don't know!

> > > By the way, mainstream probably isn't going to happen because

> the

> > lovely

> > > LEA talked the primary school out of allowing our VB therapist

> into

> > > school. They did the same in another school for another family

> and

> > so I

> > > assume they would do the same with any school we might find. Tom

> is

> > NOT

> > > ready for mainstream with a TA or alone.

> > > Do you all just happen to have accommodating friends with

> children

> > of

> > > the right age? Or do you struggle too? Or is there a way round

> this?

> > >

> > >

> > > To Sue, I agree with you that the unit for autism sounds

> worrying.

> > All I

> > > can say to you though is to follow your instincts. Would you

> > consider

> > > home ed? or Montessori/ Steiner? Do you run any sort of home

> > programme

> > > like Sonrise/ VB/ ABA/ RDI? All very expensive and difficult to

> run

> > but

> > > they give you something positive to do with your child and also

> > respite

> > > if you can pay for therapists or get volunteers (or get funding

> > which is

> > > usually not easy).

> > > Just a few thoughts and questions. Hope lots of people add their

> > > opinions here as this is all obviously very difficult territory

> for

> > all

> > > our kids.

> > > SARA

> > >

> > >

> > >

> > >

> > > Re: Jane/Peta,

mainstream

> pre-

> > school

> > > was:friend's baby reacted to vaCcines

> > >

> > >

> > > I am finding it really interesting hearing about everyone's

> > > experiences of deciding between mainstream or special needs

> > nursery.

> > > Kieran has so far been in a mainstream school, but within a

> > > supported/resourced group or classroom. This is his last year of

> > the

> > > resourced classroom, and we need to find a junior school

> placement

> > > for Sept 09. The local catholic special needs school is having

> an

> > > ASD specific class from Sept 08, but when we spoke to one of the

> > > teachers they did not seem to be very clued up on how they were

> > going

> > > to handle integration with the rest of the school, and how they

> > would

> > > meet specific needs such as socialisation at playtime. He seemed

> > > impressed that Kieran did not appear so far to have any major

> > > generalized learnng difficulty, but when we explained that he

> just

> > > does not look to other children to socialize or even communicate

> he

> > > seemed at a loss. Rather worrying when they are having an ASD

> > > specific resource.

> > > His younger brother's school is a large very busy school with a

> lot

> > > of boisterous activity - Kieran would not cope at all. Instead

> we

> > > have arranged with another local primary for Kieran to attend on

> > one

> > > afternoon per week from October till Christmas. If he and they

> > > manage and feel it will be succesful, we are going to try and

> get

> > his

> > > statement to reflect a split placement from Jan to July. There

> are

> > > only 21 kids in the class, and they have been described as very

> > > polite and well-behaved. Wow.

> > > So far we are hoping that this mainstream placement with support

> > will

> > > work out, but if it doesn't, then we may need to rely on the

> > special

> > > school. In October we are going to ask for a visit to the new

> > > premises and to meet the new headteacher and the ASD class-

> teacher-

> > > hopefully they may be more clued up than the preveious teacher

> we

> > > spoke to. I am really worried about making the wrong choice, and

> > > having a very unhappy little boy.

> > > Sue

> > >

> >

>