Anne - Re: rituals sneaking back in

[Guest guest]

Hi Anne, though has had OCD diagnosed for over 1.5 yrs, I

still feel " new " at it. I was thinking that perhaps Sullivan could

pick one/more of her compulsions (cuticles, gums, sun) and work on

delaying her compulsion - maybe try to wait a certain number of

minutes before doing it; or if you catch her at it, have her stop for

a certain number of minutes.

I, too, talk to about " OCD " so as to try not to make it sound

like it's HIM, but I'm sure he still feels like " he's " being picked

on. I might say " OCD bothering you? " if I catch him looking a

certain way (expression) or doing something/compulsion like suddenly

touching things/me. Funny how some days he can do things without a

problem one minute or that day, the next " it's " back - the OCD, and

he delays/can't do it.

Even with having OCD, his twin, , still gets the most

attention. 's always been the " neglected " one between his 2

brothers. They both take up a lot of attention - of course, a lot of

THEIR attention from me is bad - and is just a constant

talker whereas isn't. Except when the 2 of them are

disagreeing (about 30x a day).

Do you think your therapist can recommend someone else in your area

to work with Sullivan???

Aspergers is a disorder that's on the autistic spectrum. If you do a

search for info on either " autism " or " Aspergers " you'll pull up LOTS

of info.

Sounds to me like you've been doing a great job with Sullivan

regarding her need to confess things to you!!

> I was very interested in your post, especially about your older son

wanting to pick at his feet. Eight year old Sullivan's compulsions to

pull on her cuticles, push up her gums and stare at the sun, seem

impossible to use ER/P. I like what you said about wearing the

socks. I just get so confused about what is enabling and what feels

like " punishment " . Sullivan feels like we are mad at " her " I say,

I'm mad at the OCD and I want to fight that, not you. It scares me

that because she gets such a seemingly negative response that she may

hide some of her compulsions. We try to talk about the OCD and keep

exposing her to it is " the ocd and not you " . But sometimes that

makes me feel like I am pinning a label on her that makes her feel

like a kid with a " problem " (which of course, she has, but it

certainly isn't " her)

> When she " has to tell me everything " even things that I may find

offensive, (bad words, " I was thinking you're not pretty Mom) I try

to ignore and not respond. I have also had her write things down

instead of telling me and then throw it away. Any other suggestions??

> Also, what is aspergers?

> Finally, Sullivan's younger sister is often not given as much

attention as her sister is and is now making OCD remarks that she's

heard Sullivan say. Thankfully, it's imitation and a call for

attention but that is such a tough balance, giving Sullivan support

and not leaving the little one out.

> And lastly, Sullivan's wonderful CBT therapist told me last week

she is moving to Denver in 8 weeks to get married (are you folks in

Denver lucky). She has not told Sullivan yet and I am so worried

about the fallback from that and also about trying to find another

great one in Santa Barbara.

> Good grief, this was going to be a " quicky " . Sorry.

> Anne