, FIRM and update on me

[Guest guest]

Yesterday after work I actually worked out. I almost never do after work but I did because I'd told myself I would and just did it as I try to get back to regular workouts, even if it means fitting them into an unpredictable and crazy schedule. I also gave myself permission to do a very quick, light workout because I really didn't want to do much but did want to for the emotional lift any activity gives me. So, I pulled out Sansone's Muscle Mile One. It is a one mile workout, about 18 minutes long and and Kay use light weights. They have 's "walkaway balls" which are 2 pound weighted balls, I used 3 pound dumbbells for a little more intensity. Sandy is also a backgrounder and she uses no weights. The set is the patio one and the music is good. I did notice there are no hamstring curls (kickbacks as she calls them) in this one. I've never noticed that before. I haven't done this in a super long time but it worked well for me yesterday. Just enough and not too much.

Today was a virgin FIRM, Tight Buns & Killer Legs. This is from the TransFIRMation system and uses their weights. She says you need medium and heavy and doubles up for the heavy weights so I assumed she was holding 3 & 5 pounds in each hand for those. I just used 5s and 8s alone. The weights seemed okay but I wasn't crazy about the workout. It is 30 minutes, all lower body, cardio and toning. You do a strength move on one side, then a short "cardio blast" (most didn't feel much like blasts to me though) then do the strength move on the other side, then the same cardio blast again. The strength reps are short too (with 30 minutes, whaddya expect). I really like Kelsie but her personality didn't seem to come through that well on this one. She seems to be moving frantically through the workout. She also cues on the move a lot, making it hard to follow and while the add-ons to the basic strength moves seemed pretty well-paced, the moves themselves were often performed fairly quickly and, since many of them combined balance, let's just say I was teetering a lot! It might have been a bad balance day for me but I had a tough time with this one and didn't really enjoy it a lot. I need to try it again before I decide if it goes in the trade pile though, I think.

Here's the update on me... on Tuesday I found out what I had been dreading, that yes, my birth mom died very early Monday morning. Her husband thinks it was probably a heart attack brought on by an asthma attack, at least that's what I think I understood. He and I had our first conversation and while the circumstances were horrible, I'm so glad to have had it. I also talked briefly with one of my two half-brothers for the first time. They were both, despite their own pain, incredibly loving and warm. They encouraged me to attend the funeral if I want to and I decided I will. Sue (birth mom) and I had never met though we emailed frequently for years. We both thought the other wasn't ready to get together but we both wanted to... I'm not sure how we messed that up but we did and now I'm grieving not only the relationship we did have but also what we now can never have. I am, however, grateful for the love her (my) family is showing me and am hoping to build relationships with the rest of them. Her funeral is Friday afternoon. I'm scared to go but want to go. Her husband said he'll at least give me pictures of her... I just wish we had some together... I'm very sad but I'm also doing very well. I guess it "helps" that we didn't have a day-to-day closeness like I do with other people... I guess. Anyway, that's what happened. Now I'm off to work again. Thanks for your continuing thoughts and prayers.