Guest guest Posted April 28, 2009 Report Share Posted April 28, 2009 aggy i to not be of knowing if she is of spectrum or not and yes one should not use of disability to get away with bad behavior.... but if one is socially blind to how they affect others and cant understand others reactions to them,,, then Grace should be of given. I to know of it is of not the common but have met of a few who disclose of AS who are of females who are of this sort of personality and or social/communication ways. they come as rigid to thinking, not exploring but stuck to their own conclusions regardless what others to add or bring to the topic. they get of very upset if one tries to alter or add perspective that differs from their own. and they often blurt out things like a bulldozer plowing over all in the way because they need to same and will rigidly defend their own beliefs for fear of change and or altering their mindsets. My Aimee can be of a milder version of this. I to have also been of to meet of some with intent to be of mean, cruel or to cause of me emotional harm and they feel justified in doing so for the very similar reasons. some of them feel justified in public attack or degrade of me on list or on line and this causes me great pain and triggers much fear and lack why they do it towards me as never met of them or did of anything with intent to cause them harm or be of rude or offend of them. People are of very complex and confusing to me and so I to avoid them in the real of life but do allow some into my space for brief and some more than brief but most is of only the on line connections. again not saying that CJ is of specrtrum, I to just be of wondered of it though? and lacked if she was not if she were of a mom to a daughter on the spectrum. to me though it gives off spectrum. like you daughter too if one shares to me I to offended of caused them to feel of bad I to be of apologize and try again to clarify of my words or actions if it was of a misunderstand. but the bad things I to need to learn to stop doing is fearing i to caused of things when it was of not mean and often aplogize for things even if didnot create or cause of it. sondra Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted April 28, 2009 Report Share Posted April 28, 2009 aggy i to not be of knowing if she is of spectrum or not and yes one should not use of disability to get away with bad behavior.... but if one is socially blind to how they affect others and cant understand others reactions to them,,, then Grace should be of given. I to know of it is of not the common but have met of a few who disclose of AS who are of females who are of this sort of personality and or social/communication ways. they come as rigid to thinking, not exploring but stuck to their own conclusions regardless what others to add or bring to the topic. they get of very upset if one tries to alter or add perspective that differs from their own. and they often blurt out things like a bulldozer plowing over all in the way because they need to same and will rigidly defend their own beliefs for fear of change and or altering their mindsets. My Aimee can be of a milder version of this. I to have also been of to meet of some with intent to be of mean, cruel or to cause of me emotional harm and they feel justified in doing so for the very similar reasons. some of them feel justified in public attack or degrade of me on list or on line and this causes me great pain and triggers much fear and lack why they do it towards me as never met of them or did of anything with intent to cause them harm or be of rude or offend of them. People are of very complex and confusing to me and so I to avoid them in the real of life but do allow some into my space for brief and some more than brief but most is of only the on line connections. again not saying that CJ is of specrtrum, I to just be of wondered of it though? and lacked if she was not if she were of a mom to a daughter on the spectrum. to me though it gives off spectrum. like you daughter too if one shares to me I to offended of caused them to feel of bad I to be of apologize and try again to clarify of my words or actions if it was of a misunderstand. but the bad things I to need to learn to stop doing is fearing i to caused of things when it was of not mean and often aplogize for things even if didnot create or cause of it. sondra Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted April 28, 2009 Report Share Posted April 28, 2009 aggy i to not be of knowing if she is of spectrum or not and yes one should not use of disability to get away with bad behavior.... but if one is socially blind to how they affect others and cant understand others reactions to them,,, then Grace should be of given. I to know of it is of not the common but have met of a few who disclose of AS who are of females who are of this sort of personality and or social/communication ways. they come as rigid to thinking, not exploring but stuck to their own conclusions regardless what others to add or bring to the topic. they get of very upset if one tries to alter or add perspective that differs from their own. and they often blurt out things like a bulldozer plowing over all in the way because they need to same and will rigidly defend their own beliefs for fear of change and or altering their mindsets. My Aimee can be of a milder version of this. I to have also been of to meet of some with intent to be of mean, cruel or to cause of me emotional harm and they feel justified in doing so for the very similar reasons. some of them feel justified in public attack or degrade of me on list or on line and this causes me great pain and triggers much fear and lack why they do it towards me as never met of them or did of anything with intent to cause them harm or be of rude or offend of them. People are of very complex and confusing to me and so I to avoid them in the real of life but do allow some into my space for brief and some more than brief but most is of only the on line connections. again not saying that CJ is of specrtrum, I to just be of wondered of it though? and lacked if she was not if she were of a mom to a daughter on the spectrum. to me though it gives off spectrum. like you daughter too if one shares to me I to offended of caused them to feel of bad I to be of apologize and try again to clarify of my words or actions if it was of a misunderstand. but the bad things I to need to learn to stop doing is fearing i to caused of things when it was of not mean and often aplogize for things even if didnot create or cause of it. sondra Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted April 28, 2009 Report Share Posted April 28, 2009 bev sorry. I to responded to the words because felt they were of directed to me and so I to responded back to the persons words but was of just defend of my view because felt it was of directed to me. was of doing my very best to stay of respectful and shared while the words caused of me to not feel right I to went past the words to the core of her view of what she was of feeling and even told her that she has of a right to her view but that I to felt it important for me to be of have of equal share of expressing my own. but it is of so rare that the moderator intervenes here so feel since you did it must be of very bad over the words. Because only when it is of bad does the moderator come out to moderate. other wise you are of much good at letting of the members work out the issues. sondra Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted April 28, 2009 Report Share Posted April 28, 2009 Ok, post to " Upon reflection... " as long as everyone is being nice to each other and it is constructive. It is late and I am not worth two cents, I mowed the lawn again, but the last time I mowed the lawn it seems I put the wrong fuel in the lawn tractor tank, had to have someone drain the fuel tank, and I am lucky that I did not explode the lawn tractor and myself! I should not be mowing the lawn, i am not the only one who does not believe this is good idea, but I am in a divorce and attempting to survive. I attempted weed whacking last night, I managed, but then I shut the whacker off and miss a bunch of areas. I tried to get the machine started again, but no luck, I have no idea what I was doing wrong, so that will wait until I am brave enough to try again. My intelligence does not pertain to lawn care, in fact I am sure this is not a safe venture! I think my neighbor are at the point they are making bets when I will explode the tractor. It was really smoking! Bev > > OK, I am not complete sure what is happening, but I know it is best if we stop now! > > I am sure that feeling have been hurt, which no one wants anyone to have their feeling hurt, and that is a fact! > > OK, so stop the conflict! > > Sincerely, > Bev Weakley > Owner of " Autism in Girls and Women " > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted April 28, 2009 Report Share Posted April 28, 2009 Ok, post to " Upon reflection... " as long as everyone is being nice to each other and it is constructive. It is late and I am not worth two cents, I mowed the lawn again, but the last time I mowed the lawn it seems I put the wrong fuel in the lawn tractor tank, had to have someone drain the fuel tank, and I am lucky that I did not explode the lawn tractor and myself! I should not be mowing the lawn, i am not the only one who does not believe this is good idea, but I am in a divorce and attempting to survive. I attempted weed whacking last night, I managed, but then I shut the whacker off and miss a bunch of areas. I tried to get the machine started again, but no luck, I have no idea what I was doing wrong, so that will wait until I am brave enough to try again. My intelligence does not pertain to lawn care, in fact I am sure this is not a safe venture! I think my neighbor are at the point they are making bets when I will explode the tractor. It was really smoking! Bev > > OK, I am not complete sure what is happening, but I know it is best if we stop now! > > I am sure that feeling have been hurt, which no one wants anyone to have their feeling hurt, and that is a fact! > > OK, so stop the conflict! > > Sincerely, > Bev Weakley > Owner of " Autism in Girls and Women " > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted April 28, 2009 Report Share Posted April 28, 2009 Ok, post to " Upon reflection... " as long as everyone is being nice to each other and it is constructive. It is late and I am not worth two cents, I mowed the lawn again, but the last time I mowed the lawn it seems I put the wrong fuel in the lawn tractor tank, had to have someone drain the fuel tank, and I am lucky that I did not explode the lawn tractor and myself! I should not be mowing the lawn, i am not the only one who does not believe this is good idea, but I am in a divorce and attempting to survive. I attempted weed whacking last night, I managed, but then I shut the whacker off and miss a bunch of areas. I tried to get the machine started again, but no luck, I have no idea what I was doing wrong, so that will wait until I am brave enough to try again. My intelligence does not pertain to lawn care, in fact I am sure this is not a safe venture! I think my neighbor are at the point they are making bets when I will explode the tractor. It was really smoking! Bev > > OK, I am not complete sure what is happening, but I know it is best if we stop now! > > I am sure that feeling have been hurt, which no one wants anyone to have their feeling hurt, and that is a fact! > > OK, so stop the conflict! > > Sincerely, > Bev Weakley > Owner of " Autism in Girls and Women " > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted April 28, 2009 Report Share Posted April 28, 2009 I will apologize if my indignation has offended or confused anyone on this list. While my responses have been from my own weariness of abuse, I know you all may not share in that experience. Having been exposed to long term verbal abuse during my early life, I have zero tolerance for it today. My daughter may blurt out things also but she will always apologize when she realizes she has offended someone. I can not recall if I have shared with you all the drama that unfolded after Bell's birth but the result was that we had to file a restraining order against her B/F for his increasing verbal and emotional abuse that began the night she was born. As much as I love and want to be understanding of his disability, I can't give him access to my family when he cannot control his abusive tendencies. His care providers are working toward altering his medications and increasing his behavior therapy so that he will be able to have healthy contact with Katy and Bella. I just want you all to understand that being disabled is never an excuse to be abusive. Abuse should never be tolerated or excused. Just like with , it wasn't easy to see his tendencies. He didn't come right out and be abusive. Instead, he hid it and tried to back-track and cover it up and make us believe we were being paranoid. But it is what it is. those of you who have never been exposed to it will have more trouble understanding and that is ok. Again, I apologize to you all if I came across to strong.. But once you have had your life turned inside out by someone who is manipulative and abusive, you just don't play games with them. ~~~Aggy Subject: Re: Upon reflection... To: Autism_in_Girls_and_Women Date: Wednesday, April 29, 2009, 3:27 AM aggy i to not be of knowing if she is of spectrum or not and yes one should not use of disability to get away with bad behavior.... but if one is socially blind to how they affect others and cant understand others reactions to them,,, then Grace should be of given. I to know of it is of not the common but have met of a few who disclose of AS who are of females who are of this sort of personality and or social/communicatio n ways. they come as rigid to thinking, not exploring but stuck to their own conclusions regardless what others to add or bring to the topic.. they get of very upset if one tries to alter or add perspective that differs from their own. and they often blurt out things like a bulldozer plowing over all in the way because they need to same and will rigidly defend their own beliefs for fear of change and or altering their mindsets. My Aimee can be of a milder version of this. I to have also been of to meet of some with intent to be of mean, cruel or to cause of me emotional harm and they feel justified in doing so for the very similar reasons. some of them feel justified in public attack or degrade of me on list or on line and this causes me great pain and triggers much fear and lack why they do it towards me as never met of them or did of anything with intent to cause them harm or be of rude or offend of them. People are of very complex and confusing to me and so I to avoid them in the real of life but do allow some into my space for brief and some more than brief but most is of only the on line connections. again not saying that CJ is of specrtrum, I to just be of wondered of it though? and lacked if she was not if she were of a mom to a daughter on the spectrum. to me though it gives off spectrum. like you daughter too if one shares to me I to offended of caused them to feel of bad I to be of apologize and try again to clarify of my words or actions if it was of a misunderstand. but the bad things I to need to learn to stop doing is fearing i to caused of things when it was of not mean and often aplogize for things even if didnot create or cause of it. sondra Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted April 28, 2009 Report Share Posted April 28, 2009 I will apologize if my indignation has offended or confused anyone on this list. While my responses have been from my own weariness of abuse, I know you all may not share in that experience. Having been exposed to long term verbal abuse during my early life, I have zero tolerance for it today. My daughter may blurt out things also but she will always apologize when she realizes she has offended someone. I can not recall if I have shared with you all the drama that unfolded after Bell's birth but the result was that we had to file a restraining order against her B/F for his increasing verbal and emotional abuse that began the night she was born. As much as I love and want to be understanding of his disability, I can't give him access to my family when he cannot control his abusive tendencies. His care providers are working toward altering his medications and increasing his behavior therapy so that he will be able to have healthy contact with Katy and Bella. I just want you all to understand that being disabled is never an excuse to be abusive. Abuse should never be tolerated or excused. Just like with , it wasn't easy to see his tendencies. He didn't come right out and be abusive. Instead, he hid it and tried to back-track and cover it up and make us believe we were being paranoid. But it is what it is. those of you who have never been exposed to it will have more trouble understanding and that is ok. Again, I apologize to you all if I came across to strong.. But once you have had your life turned inside out by someone who is manipulative and abusive, you just don't play games with them. ~~~Aggy Subject: Re: Upon reflection... To: Autism_in_Girls_and_Women Date: Wednesday, April 29, 2009, 3:27 AM aggy i to not be of knowing if she is of spectrum or not and yes one should not use of disability to get away with bad behavior.... but if one is socially blind to how they affect others and cant understand others reactions to them,,, then Grace should be of given. I to know of it is of not the common but have met of a few who disclose of AS who are of females who are of this sort of personality and or social/communicatio n ways. they come as rigid to thinking, not exploring but stuck to their own conclusions regardless what others to add or bring to the topic.. they get of very upset if one tries to alter or add perspective that differs from their own. and they often blurt out things like a bulldozer plowing over all in the way because they need to same and will rigidly defend their own beliefs for fear of change and or altering their mindsets. My Aimee can be of a milder version of this. I to have also been of to meet of some with intent to be of mean, cruel or to cause of me emotional harm and they feel justified in doing so for the very similar reasons. some of them feel justified in public attack or degrade of me on list or on line and this causes me great pain and triggers much fear and lack why they do it towards me as never met of them or did of anything with intent to cause them harm or be of rude or offend of them. People are of very complex and confusing to me and so I to avoid them in the real of life but do allow some into my space for brief and some more than brief but most is of only the on line connections. again not saying that CJ is of specrtrum, I to just be of wondered of it though? and lacked if she was not if she were of a mom to a daughter on the spectrum. to me though it gives off spectrum. like you daughter too if one shares to me I to offended of caused them to feel of bad I to be of apologize and try again to clarify of my words or actions if it was of a misunderstand. but the bad things I to need to learn to stop doing is fearing i to caused of things when it was of not mean and often aplogize for things even if didnot create or cause of it. sondra Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted April 28, 2009 Report Share Posted April 28, 2009 I will apologize if my indignation has offended or confused anyone on this list. While my responses have been from my own weariness of abuse, I know you all may not share in that experience. Having been exposed to long term verbal abuse during my early life, I have zero tolerance for it today. My daughter may blurt out things also but she will always apologize when she realizes she has offended someone. I can not recall if I have shared with you all the drama that unfolded after Bell's birth but the result was that we had to file a restraining order against her B/F for his increasing verbal and emotional abuse that began the night she was born. As much as I love and want to be understanding of his disability, I can't give him access to my family when he cannot control his abusive tendencies. His care providers are working toward altering his medications and increasing his behavior therapy so that he will be able to have healthy contact with Katy and Bella. I just want you all to understand that being disabled is never an excuse to be abusive. Abuse should never be tolerated or excused. Just like with , it wasn't easy to see his tendencies. He didn't come right out and be abusive. Instead, he hid it and tried to back-track and cover it up and make us believe we were being paranoid. But it is what it is. those of you who have never been exposed to it will have more trouble understanding and that is ok. Again, I apologize to you all if I came across to strong.. But once you have had your life turned inside out by someone who is manipulative and abusive, you just don't play games with them. ~~~Aggy Subject: Re: Upon reflection... To: Autism_in_Girls_and_Women Date: Wednesday, April 29, 2009, 3:27 AM aggy i to not be of knowing if she is of spectrum or not and yes one should not use of disability to get away with bad behavior.... but if one is socially blind to how they affect others and cant understand others reactions to them,,, then Grace should be of given. I to know of it is of not the common but have met of a few who disclose of AS who are of females who are of this sort of personality and or social/communicatio n ways. they come as rigid to thinking, not exploring but stuck to their own conclusions regardless what others to add or bring to the topic.. they get of very upset if one tries to alter or add perspective that differs from their own. and they often blurt out things like a bulldozer plowing over all in the way because they need to same and will rigidly defend their own beliefs for fear of change and or altering their mindsets. My Aimee can be of a milder version of this. I to have also been of to meet of some with intent to be of mean, cruel or to cause of me emotional harm and they feel justified in doing so for the very similar reasons. some of them feel justified in public attack or degrade of me on list or on line and this causes me great pain and triggers much fear and lack why they do it towards me as never met of them or did of anything with intent to cause them harm or be of rude or offend of them. People are of very complex and confusing to me and so I to avoid them in the real of life but do allow some into my space for brief and some more than brief but most is of only the on line connections. again not saying that CJ is of specrtrum, I to just be of wondered of it though? and lacked if she was not if she were of a mom to a daughter on the spectrum. to me though it gives off spectrum. like you daughter too if one shares to me I to offended of caused them to feel of bad I to be of apologize and try again to clarify of my words or actions if it was of a misunderstand. but the bad things I to need to learn to stop doing is fearing i to caused of things when it was of not mean and often aplogize for things even if didnot create or cause of it. sondra Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted April 28, 2009 Report Share Posted April 28, 2009 Bev it takes of time to learn of them. the tools can be of easy but it is of hard to learn them in the begin. I to mow of the front and sides of the lawn but the back is of to my sons to do as that yard is of too much for me. i to hate of the noise of the mowers but like of the deep pressure inputs to it. I to be of lifted heavy mulch bags a few weeks or days back to do the mulching and like of the gardening, I to be of will get of my side areas ready for planting a garden of tomatoes and peppers/the front i to have of flowers and plants. sondra Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted April 28, 2009 Report Share Posted April 28, 2009 You are Ok Sondra! I am just attempting to settle everyone down, you are correct, I rarely intervene. I really appreciate your help and I think you are wonderful, I think everyone this list is wonderful. I really need to go to bed, I am about to fall asleep on my computer! I really should not mow the lawn it is just not safe, even Jen runs in the house, last week I ran into the shed with the lawn tractor. I guess I am learning, but oh my! I have no intelligence when it comes to lawn care! I tried to get rid of the weeds, well I do not know what I am doing there either! The man at the hardware store look at me in frustration! My lawn is not what it was, before this divorce thing started! Oh my! I was considering putting on weed and feed, but at this point I am think that weeds might be good thing, because I can mow them and they are green, except for the Dandelions. The one neighbor told me when he was a attempting in frustration to explain lawn care and weeds, that " this weed is not an unpleasant thing to look at! " OK, I really think he was frustrated with me, that was the darn ugliest weed I ever seen! Bev > > bev sorry. I to responded to the words because felt they were of directed to me and so I to responded back to the persons words but was of just defend of my view because felt it was of directed to me. was of doing my very best to stay of respectful and shared while the words caused of me to not feel right I to went past the words to the core of her view of what she was of feeling and even told her that she has of a right to her view but that I to felt it important for me to be of have of equal share of expressing my own. > > but it is of so rare that the moderator intervenes here so feel since you did it must be of very bad over the words. Because only when it is of bad does the moderator come out to moderate. other wise you are of much good at letting of the members work out the issues. > sondra > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted April 28, 2009 Report Share Posted April 28, 2009 You are Ok Sondra! I am just attempting to settle everyone down, you are correct, I rarely intervene. I really appreciate your help and I think you are wonderful, I think everyone this list is wonderful. I really need to go to bed, I am about to fall asleep on my computer! I really should not mow the lawn it is just not safe, even Jen runs in the house, last week I ran into the shed with the lawn tractor. I guess I am learning, but oh my! I have no intelligence when it comes to lawn care! I tried to get rid of the weeds, well I do not know what I am doing there either! The man at the hardware store look at me in frustration! My lawn is not what it was, before this divorce thing started! Oh my! I was considering putting on weed and feed, but at this point I am think that weeds might be good thing, because I can mow them and they are green, except for the Dandelions. The one neighbor told me when he was a attempting in frustration to explain lawn care and weeds, that " this weed is not an unpleasant thing to look at! " OK, I really think he was frustrated with me, that was the darn ugliest weed I ever seen! Bev > > bev sorry. I to responded to the words because felt they were of directed to me and so I to responded back to the persons words but was of just defend of my view because felt it was of directed to me. was of doing my very best to stay of respectful and shared while the words caused of me to not feel right I to went past the words to the core of her view of what she was of feeling and even told her that she has of a right to her view but that I to felt it important for me to be of have of equal share of expressing my own. > > but it is of so rare that the moderator intervenes here so feel since you did it must be of very bad over the words. Because only when it is of bad does the moderator come out to moderate. other wise you are of much good at letting of the members work out the issues. > sondra > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted April 28, 2009 Report Share Posted April 28, 2009 You are Ok Sondra! I am just attempting to settle everyone down, you are correct, I rarely intervene. I really appreciate your help and I think you are wonderful, I think everyone this list is wonderful. I really need to go to bed, I am about to fall asleep on my computer! I really should not mow the lawn it is just not safe, even Jen runs in the house, last week I ran into the shed with the lawn tractor. I guess I am learning, but oh my! I have no intelligence when it comes to lawn care! I tried to get rid of the weeds, well I do not know what I am doing there either! The man at the hardware store look at me in frustration! My lawn is not what it was, before this divorce thing started! Oh my! I was considering putting on weed and feed, but at this point I am think that weeds might be good thing, because I can mow them and they are green, except for the Dandelions. The one neighbor told me when he was a attempting in frustration to explain lawn care and weeds, that " this weed is not an unpleasant thing to look at! " OK, I really think he was frustrated with me, that was the darn ugliest weed I ever seen! Bev > > bev sorry. I to responded to the words because felt they were of directed to me and so I to responded back to the persons words but was of just defend of my view because felt it was of directed to me. was of doing my very best to stay of respectful and shared while the words caused of me to not feel right I to went past the words to the core of her view of what she was of feeling and even told her that she has of a right to her view but that I to felt it important for me to be of have of equal share of expressing my own. > > but it is of so rare that the moderator intervenes here so feel since you did it must be of very bad over the words. Because only when it is of bad does the moderator come out to moderate. other wise you are of much good at letting of the members work out the issues. > sondra > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted April 29, 2009 Report Share Posted April 29, 2009 Thank you Sondra, you are my friend too, and I like you very much, but I am not the boss. I am just like you, and you know that many times, I am of need of support too. Bev > > aggy I to be of had of much abuse of life and yet not sure if felt of abused by the person , just not sure to that. did feel of somethings but unsure of what it was that i to felt, but do know of sometimes for me not see of things as others see of them either. so maybe you were of more aware to it than to me. > > I to agree to you words about not ever accepting abuse but if one does not feel it as such cant defend of it as such. I to also like to just balance out the perspectives and veiws as a way of self evaluating so for own self can gain insight to it. > > I to also belive that Grace should be of given to a person if it is of the first exposure to the infractions of things. but as you if it is of a history of hte person to cause harm over and over and then try to make of excuses of it then to me grace is of no longer given but have learned to no longer invest time to interact to them and ignore of them. > > I to lacked seeing also what Bev seen of to call of the moderation to be on a 5 minute time out> Bev is of smart and is of the list owner and she is of the boss, and I to like of her. > sondra > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted April 29, 2009 Report Share Posted April 29, 2009 Thank you Sondra, you are my friend too, and I like you very much, but I am not the boss. I am just like you, and you know that many times, I am of need of support too. Bev > > aggy I to be of had of much abuse of life and yet not sure if felt of abused by the person , just not sure to that. did feel of somethings but unsure of what it was that i to felt, but do know of sometimes for me not see of things as others see of them either. so maybe you were of more aware to it than to me. > > I to agree to you words about not ever accepting abuse but if one does not feel it as such cant defend of it as such. I to also like to just balance out the perspectives and veiws as a way of self evaluating so for own self can gain insight to it. > > I to also belive that Grace should be of given to a person if it is of the first exposure to the infractions of things. but as you if it is of a history of hte person to cause harm over and over and then try to make of excuses of it then to me grace is of no longer given but have learned to no longer invest time to interact to them and ignore of them. > > I to lacked seeing also what Bev seen of to call of the moderation to be on a 5 minute time out> Bev is of smart and is of the list owner and she is of the boss, and I to like of her. > sondra > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted April 29, 2009 Report Share Posted April 29, 2009 Thank you Sondra, you are my friend too, and I like you very much, but I am not the boss. I am just like you, and you know that many times, I am of need of support too. Bev > > aggy I to be of had of much abuse of life and yet not sure if felt of abused by the person , just not sure to that. did feel of somethings but unsure of what it was that i to felt, but do know of sometimes for me not see of things as others see of them either. so maybe you were of more aware to it than to me. > > I to agree to you words about not ever accepting abuse but if one does not feel it as such cant defend of it as such. I to also like to just balance out the perspectives and veiws as a way of self evaluating so for own self can gain insight to it. > > I to also belive that Grace should be of given to a person if it is of the first exposure to the infractions of things. but as you if it is of a history of hte person to cause harm over and over and then try to make of excuses of it then to me grace is of no longer given but have learned to no longer invest time to interact to them and ignore of them. > > I to lacked seeing also what Bev seen of to call of the moderation to be on a 5 minute time out> Bev is of smart and is of the list owner and she is of the boss, and I to like of her. > sondra > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted April 29, 2009 Report Share Posted April 29, 2009 I am wearing very good sound protection, but it only work so well, because I am still sensitized by the noise of the mower. What has to be, has to be, so I mow the lawn and by the end of the lawn mowing I am worn out by the stress of the sound. I am avoiding, at this point mulch, because I do not know the expense, nor the best way of obtaining mulch. I have pepper and tomatoes that I started from seeds in trays, so I will have dig some holes in about 2 weeks. I bought some flower seed and some vegetable seed, that were last years seeds because the shop teacher that teaches about plants told me the that the seed purchased that are a year old are still good. Also the hardware store was selling them for ten cent a pack. Jen has been really watching me, with all the yard lawn care. She has also been yelling at me, I think if she could talk more she would have some comments say about my lack of ability. Bev > > Bev it takes of time to learn of them. the tools can be of easy but it is of hard to learn them in the begin. I to mow of the front and sides of the lawn but the back is of to my sons to do as that yard is of too much for me. i to hate of the noise of the mowers but like of the deep pressure inputs to it. I to be of lifted heavy mulch bags a few weeks or days back to do the mulching and like of the gardening, I to be of will get of my side areas ready for planting a garden of tomatoes and peppers/the front i to have of flowers and plants. > > sondra > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted April 29, 2009 Report Share Posted April 29, 2009 Land is not very expense in the area I live, so I have about 1/2 acre, that would be a big garden. A friend up the way from my home has mad her lawn into a garden and photographer pay her to use the garden to take creative senior student pictures, but she a stream in her garden. It is beautiful, but a lot of work. I think, I better just stick to mowing the lawn, pray that I learn. Bev > > > > bev sorry. I to responded to the words because felt they were of directed to me and so I to responded back to the persons words but was of just defend of my view because felt it was of directed to me. was of doing my very best to stay of respectful and shared while the words caused of me to not feel right I to went past the words to the core of her view of what she was of feeling and even told her that she has of a right to her view but that I to felt it important for me to be of have of equal share of expressing my own. > > > > but it is of so rare that the moderator intervenes here so feel since you did it must be of very bad over the words. Because only when it is of bad does the moderator come out to moderate. other wise you are of much good at letting of the members work out the issues. > > sondra > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > The new Internet Explorer 8 optimised for Yahoo!7: Faster, Safer, Easier. > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted April 29, 2009 Report Share Posted April 29, 2009 Land is not very expense in the area I live, so I have about 1/2 acre, that would be a big garden. A friend up the way from my home has mad her lawn into a garden and photographer pay her to use the garden to take creative senior student pictures, but she a stream in her garden. It is beautiful, but a lot of work. I think, I better just stick to mowing the lawn, pray that I learn. Bev > > > > bev sorry. I to responded to the words because felt they were of directed to me and so I to responded back to the persons words but was of just defend of my view because felt it was of directed to me. was of doing my very best to stay of respectful and shared while the words caused of me to not feel right I to went past the words to the core of her view of what she was of feeling and even told her that she has of a right to her view but that I to felt it important for me to be of have of equal share of expressing my own. > > > > but it is of so rare that the moderator intervenes here so feel since you did it must be of very bad over the words. Because only when it is of bad does the moderator come out to moderate. other wise you are of much good at letting of the members work out the issues. > > sondra > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > The new Internet Explorer 8 optimised for Yahoo!7: Faster, Safer, Easier. > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted April 29, 2009 Report Share Posted April 29, 2009 CJ did post after the one terse email about not sending spam email with other people's emails exposed to the world & (?) continues to repeatedly do so in spite of being asked not to send everyone's emails everywhere. (hope I summarized it correctly) I agree with Sondra to show Grace with some of the direct/terse emails that are posted periodically. Her explanation gave me insight on why some of the postings come across that way. Sondra, I hope you don't take comments made here personally. Unless it's addressed directly to you, it's made more as a general comment. If you can give insight on it, I appreciate it, but don't want you feeling hurt from comments made. Bev, good luck with your mowing endeavors! We live in AZ & have rocks & mostly desert landscape for minimal maintenance. The weeds are the biggest headache but we don't use any pesticides, so that means pulling the weeds & I also use a natural weed killing recipe of vinegar, dishsoap & dissolved salt in the vinegar. When the weeds are young, it kills them. You have a big yard though, so you'll need bigger measures. We're here for you if you want to vent about your divorce. I've been through it & probably others, so you're not alone. Marie On Tue, Apr 28, 2009 at 7:48 PM, Aggy Bouksten wrote: > CJ never mentioned if she was on the spectrum. She never gave any reason > for being on this board. I went back through the archives to try to find her > introductory post and could not find one. Being disabled does not give her > the right to be abusive. Insensitive, I could excuse but after having her > insensitivity pointed out to her, well, my daughter would have apologized > because she would never purposefully try to offend someone. I am not going > to error on the side of compassion. I have seen too many folks with > personality disorders try to bully and manipulate others, disability or no, > she could have offered an apology. ~~~Aggy > > > > > > Subject: Re: Upon reflection... > To: Autism_in_Girls_and_Women > Date: Wednesday, April 29, 2009, 2:33 AM > > > > > > > > > marie does this mean the CJ is of spectrum as tried of to find words that > referenced she was of to disclose of it but not finded of them? this would > be of to explain much as far as a huge gap of social and communication goes? > > sometimes metaphorically traffic can be of smooth flowing and then all the > sudden this car merges in ,racing and weaves and causes a crash and fire and > no one was even aware the car was of there it just suddenly came like a rush > of wind/ and everyone is of so busy getting out of the way that it creates > this huge chaos that was once calm traffic. and then people pull over and > wonder what just happened and then later find that we were of going the > speed limit but teh new one come thinking the traffic speed was of 65 in a > 35 zone because she was of already driving 60 on the high way and forget to > adjust her speed. it was not with intent but because the social boundary and > awareness was not clear to the new person who merged in. > > now that all are of aware lets be of to say okay do over. lets of all go 35 > or lets all to get to the highway where we can do of 65. > > we do not need to redo of the words,,, but redo of the repairing of the > interactions and begin of back and forth respects. > > I to hope it is of okay to post of my metaphorical thinking to this. > > My kids with Aspergers often plowed over everyone metaphorially when they > tried to interact or join in an already flowing back and forth of words. > they did not do it with intent to be of rude or cause offence it just > happens because they lacked a better way to communicate of their thinking or > how to socially enter the groups. > > sondra > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted April 29, 2009 Report Share Posted April 29, 2009 CJ did post after the one terse email about not sending spam email with other people's emails exposed to the world & (?) continues to repeatedly do so in spite of being asked not to send everyone's emails everywhere. (hope I summarized it correctly) I agree with Sondra to show Grace with some of the direct/terse emails that are posted periodically. Her explanation gave me insight on why some of the postings come across that way. Sondra, I hope you don't take comments made here personally. Unless it's addressed directly to you, it's made more as a general comment. If you can give insight on it, I appreciate it, but don't want you feeling hurt from comments made. Bev, good luck with your mowing endeavors! We live in AZ & have rocks & mostly desert landscape for minimal maintenance. The weeds are the biggest headache but we don't use any pesticides, so that means pulling the weeds & I also use a natural weed killing recipe of vinegar, dishsoap & dissolved salt in the vinegar. When the weeds are young, it kills them. You have a big yard though, so you'll need bigger measures. We're here for you if you want to vent about your divorce. I've been through it & probably others, so you're not alone. Marie On Tue, Apr 28, 2009 at 7:48 PM, Aggy Bouksten wrote: > CJ never mentioned if she was on the spectrum. She never gave any reason > for being on this board. I went back through the archives to try to find her > introductory post and could not find one. Being disabled does not give her > the right to be abusive. Insensitive, I could excuse but after having her > insensitivity pointed out to her, well, my daughter would have apologized > because she would never purposefully try to offend someone. I am not going > to error on the side of compassion. I have seen too many folks with > personality disorders try to bully and manipulate others, disability or no, > she could have offered an apology. ~~~Aggy > > > > > > Subject: Re: Upon reflection... > To: Autism_in_Girls_and_Women > Date: Wednesday, April 29, 2009, 2:33 AM > > > > > > > > > marie does this mean the CJ is of spectrum as tried of to find words that > referenced she was of to disclose of it but not finded of them? this would > be of to explain much as far as a huge gap of social and communication goes? > > sometimes metaphorically traffic can be of smooth flowing and then all the > sudden this car merges in ,racing and weaves and causes a crash and fire and > no one was even aware the car was of there it just suddenly came like a rush > of wind/ and everyone is of so busy getting out of the way that it creates > this huge chaos that was once calm traffic. and then people pull over and > wonder what just happened and then later find that we were of going the > speed limit but teh new one come thinking the traffic speed was of 65 in a > 35 zone because she was of already driving 60 on the high way and forget to > adjust her speed. it was not with intent but because the social boundary and > awareness was not clear to the new person who merged in. > > now that all are of aware lets be of to say okay do over. lets of all go 35 > or lets all to get to the highway where we can do of 65. > > we do not need to redo of the words,,, but redo of the repairing of the > interactions and begin of back and forth respects. > > I to hope it is of okay to post of my metaphorical thinking to this. > > My kids with Aspergers often plowed over everyone metaphorially when they > tried to interact or join in an already flowing back and forth of words. > they did not do it with intent to be of rude or cause offence it just > happens because they lacked a better way to communicate of their thinking or > how to socially enter the groups. > > sondra > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted April 29, 2009 Report Share Posted April 29, 2009 Oops, Sondra, that was my fault, not paying attention to my typing. I completly understand, I have a very common name and I hate when people spell it Sara. Sorry > > Sondra, I hope you don't take comments made here personally. Unless it's > addressed directly to you, it's made more as a general comment. If you can > give insight on it, I appreciate it, but don't want you feeling hurt from > comments made. > > *************** > > yes sometimes it does cause me to step back and reflect wonder then if some think this or that do they think of that in regards to me too? > > like if a mom is of sharing on the repetative questions and how annoying it gets and or is and how to get the child to stop and such things of this it makes me aware that asking questions over and over mighb e of annoying to some.... so now more careful and worry if need to ask of the same sorts of questions over and over and it is not because of a stim for me but because i to lack understand to the words of it , it is of all like foreign concepts and ideas that are of not clear to me and want to make of them clear so they get of absorbed and retained in me. > > I to be of aware that people will have a different mindset than me and while this is of good it also produces much anxiety to me over it for fear what do they think of me or about of me. do they see of me as a baby, or retarded or stupid or to be a person they avoid if they see of me, do the be of nice to be of nice but in real cant stand of me and are of greatly annoyed of me. > > it is of somethings I to need to work through. > > But here is of the question I to see of words as sandi, sandra and hten of my name and not sure of the people are of all meaning of me but using different fashions of my name to reference of me. if so my name is of Sondra and not like to be of called sandy or sandra because the father of me was of having an affair with a female person named of and that is of why he insisted of my name to be of that and the only good things the mother did of my life that was f right was to take of my birth certificate once she found this out and altered the name to Sondra with an O instead of an A. and because of being of aware of this , I to share even before of my birth was already cursed of things. I to be of should of been called jabeth which means pain..... because I to carry enough of it from those two birth parents of me. Maybe it is of the reason she hated of me so much. > > but if those now aware of why the name is of an issues will be of to please always refer to me as Sondra, the siblings call of me sonnie and in school teachers and kids often called of me sonya. but never . > > sondra > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted April 29, 2009 Report Share Posted April 29, 2009 Oops, Sondra, that was my fault, not paying attention to my typing. I completly understand, I have a very common name and I hate when people spell it Sara. Sorry > > Sondra, I hope you don't take comments made here personally. Unless it's > addressed directly to you, it's made more as a general comment. If you can > give insight on it, I appreciate it, but don't want you feeling hurt from > comments made. > > *************** > > yes sometimes it does cause me to step back and reflect wonder then if some think this or that do they think of that in regards to me too? > > like if a mom is of sharing on the repetative questions and how annoying it gets and or is and how to get the child to stop and such things of this it makes me aware that asking questions over and over mighb e of annoying to some.... so now more careful and worry if need to ask of the same sorts of questions over and over and it is not because of a stim for me but because i to lack understand to the words of it , it is of all like foreign concepts and ideas that are of not clear to me and want to make of them clear so they get of absorbed and retained in me. > > I to be of aware that people will have a different mindset than me and while this is of good it also produces much anxiety to me over it for fear what do they think of me or about of me. do they see of me as a baby, or retarded or stupid or to be a person they avoid if they see of me, do the be of nice to be of nice but in real cant stand of me and are of greatly annoyed of me. > > it is of somethings I to need to work through. > > But here is of the question I to see of words as sandi, sandra and hten of my name and not sure of the people are of all meaning of me but using different fashions of my name to reference of me. if so my name is of Sondra and not like to be of called sandy or sandra because the father of me was of having an affair with a female person named of and that is of why he insisted of my name to be of that and the only good things the mother did of my life that was f right was to take of my birth certificate once she found this out and altered the name to Sondra with an O instead of an A. and because of being of aware of this , I to share even before of my birth was already cursed of things. I to be of should of been called jabeth which means pain..... because I to carry enough of it from those two birth parents of me. Maybe it is of the reason she hated of me so much. > > but if those now aware of why the name is of an issues will be of to please always refer to me as Sondra, the siblings call of me sonnie and in school teachers and kids often called of me sonya. but never . > > sondra > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted April 30, 2009 Report Share Posted April 30, 2009 Thank you for nice story. Bev > > My husband told of a man in his neighborhood, Mr. Glazner. He was so obsessed with his lawn he mowed it twice a week. His wife hated dandelions & he did too, Craig said he would poison them, dig them, everything. He died on his riding lawn mower. Craig was a pallbearer at his funeral. He said a few months went by & he went with his mom to put some flowers on his grave & it was completely covered by dandelions. He said that taught him a lot about life & not going nuts over things that mean so little in the end. > > Debi > > - > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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