Why don't people act against mold?

[Guest guest]

,

> I'm still having a tough time trying to make sense of the sheer

> magnitude of disinterest from the very people who would seemingly have

> the greatest desire for this information. -

This is puzzling to me, too. At first I thought it was just the ones

who had not been sufficiently impacted that were in denial. Why fight

against dogs, for example, if you've never been attacked by one? Or

drunk drivers? Not much was done until two women on opposite ends of

the country lost family members to drunk drivers and created MADD.

But there is another level here: Those that are already impacted. And

there are at least two reasons in which the severely impacted differ

from those in denial, while at the same time behaving in a remarkably

similar manner.

One reason involves victimization, the dynamics of which are very

difficult to break out of. Especially when it involves relationships.

I had to choose between my marriage and myself. What made it even

more difficult was I was raised to believe that choosing the latter

was not only selfish but a sin of pride. I didn't make the choice

until I had risked my health to near the point of no return, until I

felt I had no choice but to risk my family and my marriage. And when

I did my greatest fears were realized as I lost them, too. But I am

healthier today and very productive. If I hadn't taken the risk (and

the losses) I would have become homeless and would not have survived

the harsh outdoor conditions. I grieve the loss and the ten+ years of

lost life, but celebrate my new life.

The other reason is when we are trying very hard, but what we get for

our trouble and good intentions is self serving advice and

authoritative demands that are contradictory. And, besides, they not

only don't work but usually makes us even more ill.

So we don't trust anybody. And we have no caregiver. Yet we are

desperate for both. We are left with having to provide both for

ourselves by ourselves at the very time we are least capable.

We reach a point that is opposite of denial. It is called

hypervigilence. Racing around from one attempt to the next without

giving any of them an opportunity for a legitimate chance for

success. Latching on to everything with any glimmer of hope, whether

it is deserving of hope or not. We can't go back to denial and the

only alternative seems to be despair. We can't be blamed for avoiding

dispair, can we?

The key is called vigilance. This ideal-sounding state between the

extremes of denial and hypervigilance. Vigilance is the behavior of

evaluating not just what will work for you, but whether or not the

perception is even a danger to you. I'm of the opinion that we must

experience both denial and hypervigilence before we can recognize and

then create vigilence.

I remember when I started doing consulting work while I was still

very ill. I was often frightened by the sudden shift in reactions as

I entered the building. But because I didn't want to cancel the

appointment I began asking myself, " Am I actually being harmed or is

this reaction creating fear? " If I continued to perceive that I was

being harmed, I'd leave. If not, I'd stay and finish the appointment.

Mold IS a danger to some. But not to all of us all the time. IF

something else is the danger but we focus exclusively on mold, we

will continue the harm. Or, conversely, if we focus exclusively on

pollen or chemicals when mold is the cause then we also continue the

harm. Which makes the end result no different than with denial: We

continue the harm.

So it is critical to learn as much as possible, experiment to develop

our own truth, change our behavior as warranted instead of stubbornly

sticking to old beliefs or rushing to the next " magic bullet. " And we

need a community of support, such as this group and others.

What we all need, though, is a PROCESS we can trust. Not which pill

or which air purifier or which type of house or which city is the

best. What we need is a reliable procedure to follow that will reveal

to us, each in our own way, what we need to know and do, what not to

do, and how to evaluate the results.

Carl Grimes

Healthy Habitats LLC