Re: Next Top Model an AS woman?

[Guest guest]

I also wanted to say that she might like the structure

of people telling her exactly what to do. Sit, stand,

look at the camera this way, etc. Nothing to figure

out or mystery as to what to do next.

This is exactly the reason why I did so well in the

military. Everything was spelled out. Nothing vague

that I had to figure out on my own. Since I am very

rule oriented, I had no problem following orders or

respecting authority figures, even if I disagreed with

them. They were the boss, not me. As long as they did

not order me to do anything against my ethics or

morals, I had no problem doing what they said.

When I was a child and teen, being put in situations

where I did not know what to do or act caused me great

anxiety. Being called a retard, or game playing, for

not knowing what to do did not help. So a situation

where everything was spelled out for me was quite

appealing. People did not think I would do well in the

military, that I would wash out, but I did not,

because I thrived on the structure of it.

Take care,

Gail :-)

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[Guest guest]

Gail, thanks for giving the input of how she views modeling. That was

helpful.

>...it seems that she was persuaded by friends and family to apply for

the show. From what she said, she would not have otherwise.

[Guest guest]

In a message dated 9/21/2007 6:29:28 P.M. Eastern Daylight Time, aspie_girl@... writes:

I have a "phone voice" that I used to answer phoneswith when I was assigned to the tool crib in the AFwhile pregnant. It is just something I naturally did,and people would comment on it often as to howimpressed they were with it. I use a variation of thesame voice when I take orders at Mcs. Customerslove me, probably because I am very sincere as well asattentive to them.

I too have a phone voice, though I have moderated it over time. Time was that my calls would often unsettle people because I sounded like a police officer or someone from the IRS. This wasn't so bad with friends as I was more relaxed with them.

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[Guest guest]

" My childhood was very painful and even into my 20's I was clueless

about the way other people experienced life and not self-aware enough

to understand what I was experiencing. I have come a long way, but

it still hurts to be judged for not being 'smart enough' to figure

something out that was so obvious to someone else. "

Yep. Not so many years ago I discovered the existence of something

terrible that I never could have dreamed up. Other people were

surprised I never knew of it.

" I'm asexual and had no clue about sexuality or exploitation in that

area... Most of the time I felt like a worthless nothing and often

drew pictures of myself as an ugly, skinny, large jointed goon with

pimples all over my face. So when a stranger came up to me and told

me I was beautiful it was astonishing for me. Nobody had ever said

that to me before. I simply did not have the sophistication to

understand that the 'beauty' they see was not something they want to

treasure and celebrate, but to exploit. "

Okay.

" So no, at fourteen it wouldn't have occurred to me that by becoming

a model I could become a role model for anorexia - it never would

have crossed my mind that anyone would look to me for anything...

all I thought when I first signed up was that maybe I wasn't such an

ugly twig after all. "

Okay.

I remember when I was twelve. I was asked along with some neighbors'

kids to do a TV commercial for some board game. I would not do it

because I didn't like the game. Even when the producers explained

that I didn't actually have to like the game, just to pretend to be

playng it, I said no. They were disappointed because I was

supposedly a good looking kid, and it was then that I realized they

did not want ME, they wanted my image.

If you've listened to the podcasts, you will have heard my voice.

That is not exactly my TRUE voice. I have a number of them and that

is the one I use for podcasts. When answering phones at my old job I

used a deeper, warmer one, and one of our customers for a religious

radio network asked me if I would consider doing some promotional

work for them, and I told them no, because their religion was not my

religion.

I've always wondered whether or not others -particularly Aspies-

have thought along these lines when confronted with opportunities of

this sort.

I know that Raven has never forwarded her music career via

the " couch. " I know other Aspies who have thought similarly.

" If everyone was able to rationalize through that a naturally skinny

girl would be at fault for leading heavier girls to starve

themselves, then yes, they would be CHOOSING to be bad people to

make money. But I don't even think the girls that are starving

themselves are doing it to hurt others, they more than likely think

there is something wrong with themselves and they have to do it to

be beautiful enough. "

But don't they realize that they feel that way because they bought

into the image that others created before them? Someone needs to

break the cycle.

" I posted because I wanted to explain how naive girls can be about

what they are getting into. But maybe your point is that an Aspie

girl should know better? "

Maybe. I'm not really sure. In my opinion, yes.

" Again, I apologize if I've come off harsh - you hit close to home

and I feel rather protective of that little girl I used to be. She

was intelligent, but she was very, very naive. "

Okay.

Tom

Administrator

[Guest guest]

" My childhood was very painful and even into my 20's I was clueless

about the way other people experienced life and not self-aware enough

to understand what I was experiencing. I have come a long way, but

it still hurts to be judged for not being 'smart enough' to figure

something out that was so obvious to someone else. "

Yep. Not so many years ago I discovered the existence of something

terrible that I never could have dreamed up. Other people were

surprised I never knew of it.

" I'm asexual and had no clue about sexuality or exploitation in that

area... Most of the time I felt like a worthless nothing and often

drew pictures of myself as an ugly, skinny, large jointed goon with

pimples all over my face. So when a stranger came up to me and told

me I was beautiful it was astonishing for me. Nobody had ever said

that to me before. I simply did not have the sophistication to

understand that the 'beauty' they see was not something they want to

treasure and celebrate, but to exploit. "

Okay.

" So no, at fourteen it wouldn't have occurred to me that by becoming

a model I could become a role model for anorexia - it never would

have crossed my mind that anyone would look to me for anything...

all I thought when I first signed up was that maybe I wasn't such an

ugly twig after all. "

Okay.

I remember when I was twelve. I was asked along with some neighbors'

kids to do a TV commercial for some board game. I would not do it

because I didn't like the game. Even when the producers explained

that I didn't actually have to like the game, just to pretend to be

playng it, I said no. They were disappointed because I was

supposedly a good looking kid, and it was then that I realized they

did not want ME, they wanted my image.

If you've listened to the podcasts, you will have heard my voice.

That is not exactly my TRUE voice. I have a number of them and that

is the one I use for podcasts. When answering phones at my old job I

used a deeper, warmer one, and one of our customers for a religious

radio network asked me if I would consider doing some promotional

work for them, and I told them no, because their religion was not my

religion.

I've always wondered whether or not others -particularly Aspies-

have thought along these lines when confronted with opportunities of

this sort.

I know that Raven has never forwarded her music career via

the " couch. " I know other Aspies who have thought similarly.

" If everyone was able to rationalize through that a naturally skinny

girl would be at fault for leading heavier girls to starve

themselves, then yes, they would be CHOOSING to be bad people to

make money. But I don't even think the girls that are starving

themselves are doing it to hurt others, they more than likely think

there is something wrong with themselves and they have to do it to

be beautiful enough. "

But don't they realize that they feel that way because they bought

into the image that others created before them? Someone needs to

break the cycle.

" I posted because I wanted to explain how naive girls can be about

what they are getting into. But maybe your point is that an Aspie

girl should know better? "

Maybe. I'm not really sure. In my opinion, yes.

" Again, I apologize if I've come off harsh - you hit close to home

and I feel rather protective of that little girl I used to be. She

was intelligent, but she was very, very naive. "

Okay.

Tom

Administrator

[Guest guest]

Tom wrote:

>When answering phones

> at my old job I

> used a deeper, warmer one, and one of our customers

> for a religious

> radio network asked me if I would consider doing

> some promotional

> work for them, and I told them no, because their

> religion was not my

> religion.

I have a " phone voice " that I used to answer phones

with when I was assigned to the tool crib in the AF

while pregnant. It is just something I naturally did,

and people would comment on it often as to how

impressed they were with it. I use a variation of the

same voice when I take orders at Mcs. Customers

love me, probably because I am very sincere as well as

attentive to them.

> I've always wondered whether or not others

> -particularly Aspies-

> have thought along these lines when confronted with

> opportunities of

> this sort.

I have *never* been offered opportunities of that

sort. They pass me by, I guess! :-P

Take care,

Gail :-)

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[Guest guest]

In a message dated 9/21/2007 11:22:54 P.M. Eastern Daylight Time, epitome_hawke@... writes:

I forgot to ask - do either of you sing as well? I've sung in choirs,in small bands and enjoy singing Irish type music very much...

No, I can't sing to save my life. Regarding your other post, I recorded the message on the answering machine of an elderly neighbor. For a while, some of the people that called him wondered how he got a personalized message. It had been suggested that I try out for radio. Never cared for that idea though. Changing records all day would be boring and the celebrity of a talk show is not something that interests me.

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[Guest guest]

> Maybe. I'm not really sure. In my opinion, yes.

I would have to disagree then. I don't think everybody of a specific

neuro-similarity will always develop their reasoning ability and reach

the same conclusions at the same age.

[Guest guest]

>

>

> In a message dated 9/21/2007 6:29:28 P.M. Eastern Daylight Time,

> aspie_girl@... writes:

>

> I have a " phone voice " that I used to answer phones

> with when I was assigned to the tool crib in the AF

> while pregnant. It is just something I naturally did,

> and people would comment on it often as to how

> impressed they were with it. I use a variation of the

> same voice when I take orders at Mcs. Customers

> love me, probably because I am very sincere as well as

> attentive to them.

>

> I too have a phone voice, though I have moderated it over time. Time

was

> that my calls would often unsettle people because I sounded like a

police

> officer or someone from the IRS. This wasn't so bad with friends as

I was more

> relaxed with them.

>

>

Fascinating! I was asked to record the phone messages at one of the

places I worked because they said I had a good phone voice.

My voice has a very clear 'tone' to it especially when I was younger -

and quite often while leaving a message my voice would set off the

phone system; it would respond as if I had pressed a button! Amusing

the first couple of times, extremely annoying there after.

[Guest guest]

>

>

> In a message dated 9/21/2007 6:29:28 P.M. Eastern Daylight Time,

> aspie_girl@... writes:

>

> I have a " phone voice " that I used to answer phones

> with when I was assigned to the tool crib in the AF

> while pregnant. It is just something I naturally did,

> and people would comment on it often as to how

> impressed they were with it. I use a variation of the

> same voice when I take orders at Mcs. Customers

> love me, probably because I am very sincere as well as

> attentive to them.

>

>

>

>

>

> I too have a phone voice, though I have moderated it over time. Time

was

> that my calls would often unsettle people because I sounded like a

police

> officer or someone from the IRS. This wasn't so bad with friends as

I was more

> relaxed with them.

>

>

I forgot to ask - do either of you sing as well? I've sung in choirs,

in small bands and enjoy singing Irish type music very much...

[Guest guest]

asked:

> I forgot to ask - do either of you sing as well?

> I've sung in choirs,

> in small bands and enjoy singing Irish type music

> very much...

Do I sing? LOL! I *love* to sing!! :-)

Take care,

Gail :-)

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[Guest guest]

There are other things you can do on the radio though, like commercial

announcements or radio shows.

Breaking into it is hard though.

Tom

Administrator

It had been suggested that I try out for radio. Never cared for that

idea though. Changing records all day would be boring and the

celebrity of a talk show is not something that interests me.

[Guest guest]

> People did not think I would do well in the

> military, that I would wash out, but I did not,

> because I thrived on the structure of it.

I'm glad you went ahead with what you wanted. I wanted to go into the

military at one point, but was strongly discouraged (and if I remember

correctly, laughed at) because they thought I wasn't tough enough or

disciplined enough. Something along the lines of - I'd be there a

week and be crying to come home... I didn't know myself well enough

or have enough confidence to counter that reaction and instead decided

to major in art education - because my mom said that's what she

thought I'd be good at. That didn't work out at all...

[Guest guest]

>

I know this post is several days old but I couldn't help but resonate

with your description of a girl whom others may have found pretty but

whom felt awkward, naive and ill treated

Your quote is very on target:

If anyone is to blame for skinny models, it's the rich men and women

who create a market. If they would design decent, well fitting

clothes they wouldn't need walking hangers to display them on.

I feel rather protective of that little girl I used to be. She was

intelligent, but she was very, very naive.

This indeed becomes a sticking point for AS women and can make them

unwhitting targets to a whole host of seedy prospects. I was

approached by many an older male whom knew what they were doing but I

did not. NT behavior seems to be to target those that can be

exploited and go man go. This is seen in our own childhoods, our

environments and with our own children

Having been hurt I strive to keep my children from harm. While my

girls are more savvy they still needed a strong parent advocate. AS

is a hard teacher. I seem to have learned everything by being hurt

by a negative response and my transforming it into a positive

lesson. Not easy and painful. i would put many of the posters in

this same catagory. School of unparrelled creulity being a teacher

of unparrelled compassion.

thanks Sox for congeeling this sentiment, and being honest

[Guest guest]

>

People did not think I would do well in the

> military, that I would wash out, but I did not,

> because I thrived on the structure of it.

>

> Gail :-)

>

that is interesting I was given a carreer test and military officer

was seen as what I should consider. this was threatening to me

because I do not trust others to make choices for me (umm it never

has worked out) and so because I must think my own problems through I

couldn't do this. I admit it appealed in the form of neatness and

structure and I am good at following a direction, but only if I

believe in it and so I was wary of the military(having known people

in the military with bad reps growing up) I cannot tolerate injustice

and being in an environ that made rank equate to right scared me.

Unless I was in charge. I trust myself to be considerate of others I

don't trust others to be considerate of me (nor do I expect it) so I

must stay independant to stay safe. interesting thread