Re: Need School Advice again please...and an update - LONG

[Guest guest]

Anne,

As a special ed teacher, here are a few thoughts. Does your school

district have an inclusion teacher? You have the right to keep her in

the least restrictive environment. So the district needs to prove that

she can't succeed in the regular classroom. An inclusion teacher can

would come into the room to offer support to students that are

suffering. Every district is different in how they present this. If

they didn't have a teacher is there an aide that could help her. It is

hard to say since I don't know what her difficulties are but the aide

may help her to maintain focus, be organized, help her take notes.

Whatever the team would think may help her. Remember you have the

right to call an IEP meeting anytime you feel it is needed. In my area

you can get advocates to go to the IEP meetings with you. Sometimes

teachers can be taken aback when one is brought in but I feel if you

approach it as we are looking for what is best for our daughter and try

to share your thoughts rather than demanding it goes better.

Good luck! Hope this helps.

Deb

[Guest guest]

Hi, Anne. When did your school year begin? I teach

3rd grade.

I don't think the teacher knows much about OCD.

Truthfully, I wouldn't if I didn't have it myself,

along with my daughter (and my dad). Did you have a

hand in her teacher placement? There should be

special consideration of where your daughter is being

placed.

When you say Resource Room, I am thinking of Special

Day (full day resource). Do they have a program, like

RSP (Resource Specialist Program)--where mainstreamed

students go for an hour or so a day to work on a

certain area? Is this what she is doing for math? I

have a student who is going to RSP for math, but also

the time is extended a bit to give her more

support/time with other assignments. She can also go

there when she needs a " break " . Usually it is our RSP

teacher who helps with the transition...if things

aren't going well, she comes in, or the students goes

to her. This teacher is different from our Special

Day.

Is there a 504 Plan in place?

I know we have a 6th grader who is OCD/Anxiety, on

meds. A meeting was called, parents, teachers,

resource, psych. It was to go over the 504 Plan. In

it, it mentioned how he needs to be able to sit next

to an exit, etc....I can't get in specifics....but,

accomodations were made and shared to help him feel

comfortable.

Before calling an advocate, try again. If you call an

advocate, then they will tag you as a problem they

don't want to touch or deal with. Do that as your

last resort. Whoever you feel most comfortable with,

who is most knowledgable--would that be the

psychologist? Talk to that person about your

frustrations and questions. If you feel you are still

not being heard, go to the principal. If you are

still feeling rejected, ask the principal for numbers

down at the district office...Special Education,

Director of Elementary Education, etc. Principals

don't like that. The district people...they are the

ones to mention needing an advocate.

All schools work differently, in different districts.

I know at my school...it would most definitely be

resolved at the psychologist level...where she would

hold a meeting with teacher, parents, principal,

resource, to talk about accomodations.

This is just from the teacher side of it. My daughter

is just beginning to have troubles...and don't know

what the road holds ahead. However, being a teacher

in her district....they know me as a colleague...her

teachers know I know what accomodations can and should

be made, and know I know how to cause trouble. Her

teachers have all been specially chosen....and

accomodations have been made.

Good luck!

--- amaubie <amaubie@...> wrote:

> Hi all,

>

> After I received such great advice several weeks

> ago...I am following

> up again here. My DD is 8 years old and in 3rd

> grade. She has been

> in the resource room in 1st and 2nd and was

> mainstreamed this year to

> the regular classroom for everything but math. We

> had to fight to

> meet w/the teachers (former resource teacher who I'm

> close with

> basically confirmed that the teachers this year

> think we are just

> neurotic parents) to give them a " heads up " this

> year on her OCD and

> potential problems from that. Anyway, when we met

> w/the classroom

> teacher - he was very nonchalent. When I asked if

> he had looked in

> her file and knew that she has OCD - he brushed me

> off saying

> that " she doesn't worry in here - we have an

> understanding - I tell

> her not to worry and all is fine " (Gee...why am I

> wasting all that $

> in therapy - I'll just tell her not to worry!!). He

> kept telling

> us " she's doing just fine in here - no problems

> whatsoever. " After

> we left his class (there was no way to tell him

> otherwise - he's a

> very seasoned, hands off teacher) - we ran into the

> counselor. She

> told us that she was glad she'd run into us because

> our DD had been

> to see her telling her about the OCD/worrying etc.

> She said that it

> was concerning her and that she had wanted to talk

> to us. I gave her

> permission to speak w/DD's psychologist. I also

> told her that it

> seemed like her regular teacher could benefit from

> some education on

> childhood OCD and asked if she would help out this

> way. I also

> emailed her some really informative articles I

> pulled from the files

> section on this site as well as the OCD foundation

> website.

>

> Well, DD is already starting to have problems in her

> regular

> classroom. We found this out when the weekly report

> today

> states " she CONTINUES to have problems with

> controlling her talking " -

> and he'd never sent home one word before this of

> problem behavior.

> She is doing great in reading - but grammer and

> spelling are a huge

> issue. We feel like she fell REALLY behind in these

> 2 things while

> in the resource room. My question to you all...do

> you know if there

> is anything that is supposed to help transition

> children when they go

> from the resource room back to the regular

> classroom? Or if there

> are any programs that the public schools offer to

> provide additional

> support in these problem areas (but without putting

> her back in the

> resource room)? Again, we are at a loss. I'm

> thinking at this

> point - we need to call an IEP to get some help in

> place (her papers

> this week were really a disaster) before it gets so

> far along that

> she is even more behind.

>

> We feel like if we call an IEP meeting - the

> teachers will get

> resentful. They were not pleased to meet w/us

> separately and

> absolutely did not want to meet with us together.

> When I emailed the

> resource teacher to ask if she were attending DD's

> main conference in

> Oct - she never responded to that question. We are

> also thinking of

> hiring an " educational advocate " to help us through

> all of this. We

> really don't want to put her back in the resource

> room (for

> reading/lang arts) and don't know what any other

> options would be.

>

> Again, thank you so much - you all have been so

> helpful and

> supportive in this group. It has been such a source

> of comfort to

> me...

>

> Have a nice weekend,

> Anne

>

>

>

>

________________________________________________________________________________\

____

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[Guest guest]

Anne,

I am shocked you were denied a meeting with both

teachers at the same time. I can't even understand

that. I can't believe they can deny that if it is in

the plan! What state are you in?

If my daughter came home with those papers this week,

I would request a conference...at least a phone

conference. I would ask the teacher what you can do

to help your daughter at home..what you can do to help

support HIM (the teacher) in the classroom.

As a teacher...I would want the parent to contact me

if I was sending papers like that home. I would want

them to be willing to help support my teachings. I

like parents to work with their children on the things

they get wrong...I would want you to sit with your

daughter and work with her on those tests. My students

can raise their grade to a C- if they fix it at home.

To me, the objective is for them to learn the info,

period.

You said her reading is fine, right? Reading and

writing are normally reciprocal....the more you read,

the better you write, and vice versa. She needs

writing practice. At home, you two could write

letters to each other. You could have her practice

writing a few sentences a night...ask her to write a

sentence with the word " dog " in it (or whatever). Ask

her to write a question. Let her tell you some

sentences to write, and have her read them (you would

be modeling the correct way to write). You are NOT

correcting her work....you could guide her if you see

a mistake. " Do you think you can think of a better

word to go there? " Write a story together. You write

one sentence, she writes the next. Do sentence

patterns....make a chart, with 6 columns...in

order--Articles, Adjectives, Noun, Verbs, Adverbs,

Prepositional Phrases. Start with a noun (dog) Only

list one noun. What can a dog do? List them on a

chart (verbs). How can a dog do that (adverbs)?

Where can he do that (prep phrases). Describe the dog

(adjectives--put before noun). And articles (A, The).

Write sentences from that " A brown dog runs quickly

to the park " . But a bunch of stamps, let her write

letters to family...have them write back. Or emails.

These are things I tell my parents to do with there is

a writing problem.

For spelling, there is a book called Word Journeys.

It is a word study, it teaches word patterns. You may

want to work on that with her. It is more geared

towards teachers....you may be able to find something

on the internet about word study or such. It is a

developmental approach.

If there is no improvement by conference time, the

teacher should be contacting the resource to see if

any help can be given. At that point, you may need to

call an IEP.

I hope some of this helps!

________________________________________________________________________________\

____

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[Guest guest]

Hi Anne, I am in process of getting a 504 in plcae for my 5th grade

son, the psychologist suggested it (not us) b/c he is not coping well

in the classroom, though does not need academic support, but a way to

be more relaxed (mainly contamination ocd). Fortunately he was a good

student with just mild ocd last year, so they can see the ocd has

taken over.

The one piece of advice I wanted to suggest(b/c others have alot more

experience with this I think) is, can you work by email with teacher

psychologist and resource teacher? (Maybe you already do this). I am

finding it easier to mainatin communication with everyone in the loop

this way, b/c I have all the email adresses and just CC everything.

It is sometimes easier for me to discuss symptoms by email than in

person too, b/c in person I do tend to feel like maybe I am coming

across as the neurotic mom as well, so will end up toning down my

concerns, which really does not get my son all the help he needs.

Best of luck,

nancy grace

>

> Hi all,

>

> After I received such great advice several weeks ago...I am

following

> up again here. My DD is 8 years old and in 3rd grade. She has

been

> in the resource room in 1st and 2nd and was mainstreamed this year

to

> the regular classroom for everything but math. We had to fight to

> meet w/the teachers (former resource teacher who I'm close with

> basically confirmed that the teachers this year think we are just

> neurotic parents) to give them a " heads up " this year on her OCD

and

> potential problems from that. Anyway, when we met w/the classroom

> teacher - he was very nonchalent. When I asked if he had looked in

> her file and knew that she has OCD - he brushed me off saying

> that " she doesn't worry in here - we have an understanding - I tell

> her not to worry and all is fine " (Gee...why am I wasting all that

$

> in therapy - I'll just tell her not to worry!!). He kept telling

> us " she's doing just fine in here - no problems whatsoever. " After

> we left his class (there was no way to tell him otherwise - he's a

> very seasoned, hands off teacher) - we ran into the counselor. She

> told us that she was glad she'd run into us because our DD had been

> to see her telling her about the OCD/worrying etc. She said that

it

> was concerning her and that she had wanted to talk to us. I gave

her

> permission to speak w/DD's psychologist. I also told her that it

> seemed like her regular teacher could benefit from some education

on

> childhood OCD and asked if she would help out this way. I also

> emailed her some really informative articles I pulled from the

files

> section on this site as well as the OCD foundation website.

>

> Well, DD is already starting to have problems in her regular

> classroom. We found this out when the weekly report today

> states " she CONTINUES to have problems with controlling her

talking " -

> and he'd never sent home one word before this of problem

behavior.

> She is doing great in reading - but grammer and spelling are a huge

> issue. We feel like she fell REALLY behind in these 2 things while

> in the resource room. My question to you all...do you know if

there

> is anything that is supposed to help transition children when they

go

> from the resource room back to the regular classroom? Or if there

> are any programs that the public schools offer to provide

additional

> support in these problem areas (but without putting her back in the

> resource room)? Again, we are at a loss. I'm thinking at this

> point - we need to call an IEP to get some help in place (her

papers

> this week were really a disaster) before it gets so far along that

> she is even more behind.

>

> We feel like if we call an IEP meeting - the teachers will get

> resentful. They were not pleased to meet w/us separately and

> absolutely did not want to meet with us together. When I emailed

the

> resource teacher to ask if she were attending DD's main conference

in

> Oct - she never responded to that question. We are also thinking

of

> hiring an " educational advocate " to help us through all of this.

We

> really don't want to put her back in the resource room (for

> reading/lang arts) and don't know what any other options would be.

>

> Again, thank you so much - you all have been so helpful and

> supportive in this group. It has been such a source of comfort to

> me...

>

> Have a nice weekend,

> Anne

>

[Guest guest]

Hi ,

Thank you so much. Your email was so filled with great information

and very helpful to me. My husband had suggested last night that we

sit down this weekend w/her and have her correct all this work. She

can't bring her grade up by correcting it - but it will help her

learn the information which is the goal right now.

We are in GA. I believe that neither the resource teacher nor the

gen ed teacher read her IEP this year (remember, the gen ed teacher

didn't even know of her OCD which is in that document). I hadn't

remembered that we requested this (at the last IEP last year) and

just looked at it last night when I reviewed the IEP. Had I been more

educated about this whole process...I should have pulled that out at

the beginning of the year and then included that " as we requested

this in our IEP last year - we would like to schedule a time to meet

with both teachers together " . When I requested this meeting at the

beginning of the year - both teachers blew us off (the resource

teacher even telling us that " there is curriculem night and then

conferences in Oct " ). She even went on to tell me that she is never

available to meet us after school because " of her own children and

staff meetings at school " . We pushed the issue and was able to get

separate conferences w/each teacher (we went on 2 separate days at 11

AM...they share the same planning period and still wouldn't meet us

together - very frustrating). This board, though, is really helping

me to get educated about all this and know the rights that we have -

and for that I am so grateful.

Again, thank you so much for all of your ideas. I'm so very

appreciative.

Anne

[Guest guest]

Hi Grace,

Thank you for your suggestion as well. The teacher definitely prefers

email; however, the psychologist (who is our private psychologist - not

the school psychologist) prefers to talk w/the school in person. She

is so supportive, though and is willing to talk w/every team member

involved w/DD. So far, the only person at the school willing to talk

w/the psychologist is the counselor. We suggested this to the gen ed

teacher as well (even giving him her card and signing a release for him

to speak w/her) - but he hasn't wanted to do this so far. Again, I

think we may need to push a little more on this.

Thanks so much,

Anne

[Guest guest]

Hi Grace,

Thank you for your suggestion as well. The teacher definitely prefers

email; however, the psychologist (who is our private psychologist - not

the school psychologist) prefers to talk w/the school in person. She

is so supportive, though and is willing to talk w/every team member

involved w/DD. So far, the only person at the school willing to talk

w/the psychologist is the counselor. We suggested this to the gen ed

teacher as well (even giving him her card and signing a release for him

to speak w/her) - but he hasn't wanted to do this so far. Again, I

think we may need to push a little more on this.

Thanks so much,

Anne

[Guest guest]

Anne,

I have no real advice as far as all of this, but I would like to add in my two

cents do do all requests that you choose to do in writing. That gives you

documentation of all dates that requests were made. I always say things in my

letter that I am doing this in writing for my own records -- that I like to keep

all pertinent information for my daughter in one notebook. I think it also

makes your request seem more official from their standpoint.

I would write exactly your feelings. That you feel the teachers believe this

is unwarranted, however, these are the reasons you are instituting this request.

Valdiate their feelings, and then explain yours. Add that you understand often

different things are seen at school and home, and this meeting would give a

chance for all to express their obsrevations. I would write to the

teachers/social worker and cc. the principal. I would add that you understand

the child is best helped when school and home all work together. I would make

yourself sound like a very positive, proactive person. I would certainly

include a copy of last year's IEP where it is stated you would start this year

with a joint meeting. I would say that I truly appreciate the accommodations

they have in the past made for your daughter -- how she has benefitted from them

-- and that with some slight adjustments, you are certain she can have a very

successful year.

I think I would start with something like this before hiring an educational

advocate -- but if you do need one later, this documentation would be good to

have.

Good luck!

in TN

amaubie <amaubie@...> wrote:

Hi Deb and ,

Thank you so much for your responses. I feel so lost w/all of this -

I am a social worker - but I work w/geriatric clients - so, this is

really out of my area of expertise. I'm used to advocating for

folks - but not when I have no idea of what I'm doing.

My DD started school on Aug 14th. I just looked through her IEP from

the end of last year - we had requested to meet w/both her gen ed

teacher and resource teacher at the beginning of the year (this was

made in the IEP) - but that request was denied this year. We met

w/both teachers separately - both acting like we were neurotic

parents and insisting that " all is fine " .

DD has an IEP - but I don't know if she has a 504 (I don't think she

does - if my memory serves me right, I think we chose the IEP instead

of the 504). For 1st and 2nd grades - she went to the resource room

15 hours per week (for lang arts, reading, spelling and math). This

year, she is only going 5 hours per week (an hour per day) and just

for math.

It is VERY obvious that she's struggling in grammer and spelling.

Her papers this week included 3 " needs improvement " , 30 % on a

grammer test and 69% on a lang arts test. My instinct early on had

told me that these were 2 areas that she was a bit behind in due to

the resource room - but I don't know how to help her. I hate to send

her back to the resource room (she's doing VERY strong in reading and

I feel like she has the capacity if we could just get her " up to

speed " ). She takes Prozac for the OCD (she has the

worries/obsessions - she worries often about throwing up) and she has

some ADHD tendencies - although the psychiatrist has not diagnosed

this and really does not want to medicate her for this since she

takes Prozac. She does have a very difficult time focusing and

paying attention. I believe some of it is from the constant worrying

and anxiety and some is the ADHD tendencies.

Would you all act on this Monday or would you give it several more

weeks to see additional grades? I hate for her to fall further

behind - but we don't want the perception that we're just neurotic

parents. When we do act on it - would you contact her gen ed teacher

first? Or go directly to the principal to ask about an IEP meeting

(and ask about an inclusion teacher as well)? We don't want to step

on any toes. Seems like if you do - it can really affect the way

that they treat you. Also, the psychologist has spoken directly with

the counselor at the school (who was supposedly going to pass along

pointers to the teachers - but neither teacher has ever commented to

us on this).

Again, thanks so much for your input.

Anne

---------------------------------

Pinpoint customers who are looking for what you sell.

[Guest guest]

Anne,

I have no real advice as far as all of this, but I would like to add in my two

cents do do all requests that you choose to do in writing. That gives you

documentation of all dates that requests were made. I always say things in my

letter that I am doing this in writing for my own records -- that I like to keep

all pertinent information for my daughter in one notebook. I think it also

makes your request seem more official from their standpoint.

I would write exactly your feelings. That you feel the teachers believe this

is unwarranted, however, these are the reasons you are instituting this request.

Valdiate their feelings, and then explain yours. Add that you understand often

different things are seen at school and home, and this meeting would give a

chance for all to express their obsrevations. I would write to the

teachers/social worker and cc. the principal. I would add that you understand

the child is best helped when school and home all work together. I would make

yourself sound like a very positive, proactive person. I would certainly

include a copy of last year's IEP where it is stated you would start this year

with a joint meeting. I would say that I truly appreciate the accommodations

they have in the past made for your daughter -- how she has benefitted from them

-- and that with some slight adjustments, you are certain she can have a very

successful year.

I think I would start with something like this before hiring an educational

advocate -- but if you do need one later, this documentation would be good to

have.

Good luck!

in TN

amaubie <amaubie@...> wrote:

Hi Deb and ,

Thank you so much for your responses. I feel so lost w/all of this -

I am a social worker - but I work w/geriatric clients - so, this is

really out of my area of expertise. I'm used to advocating for

folks - but not when I have no idea of what I'm doing.

My DD started school on Aug 14th. I just looked through her IEP from

the end of last year - we had requested to meet w/both her gen ed

teacher and resource teacher at the beginning of the year (this was

made in the IEP) - but that request was denied this year. We met

w/both teachers separately - both acting like we were neurotic

parents and insisting that " all is fine " .

DD has an IEP - but I don't know if she has a 504 (I don't think she

does - if my memory serves me right, I think we chose the IEP instead

of the 504). For 1st and 2nd grades - she went to the resource room

15 hours per week (for lang arts, reading, spelling and math). This

year, she is only going 5 hours per week (an hour per day) and just

for math.

It is VERY obvious that she's struggling in grammer and spelling.

Her papers this week included 3 " needs improvement " , 30 % on a

grammer test and 69% on a lang arts test. My instinct early on had

told me that these were 2 areas that she was a bit behind in due to

the resource room - but I don't know how to help her. I hate to send

her back to the resource room (she's doing VERY strong in reading and

I feel like she has the capacity if we could just get her " up to

speed " ). She takes Prozac for the OCD (she has the

worries/obsessions - she worries often about throwing up) and she has

some ADHD tendencies - although the psychiatrist has not diagnosed

this and really does not want to medicate her for this since she

takes Prozac. She does have a very difficult time focusing and

paying attention. I believe some of it is from the constant worrying

and anxiety and some is the ADHD tendencies.

Would you all act on this Monday or would you give it several more

weeks to see additional grades? I hate for her to fall further

behind - but we don't want the perception that we're just neurotic

parents. When we do act on it - would you contact her gen ed teacher

first? Or go directly to the principal to ask about an IEP meeting

(and ask about an inclusion teacher as well)? We don't want to step

on any toes. Seems like if you do - it can really affect the way

that they treat you. Also, the psychologist has spoken directly with

the counselor at the school (who was supposedly going to pass along

pointers to the teachers - but neither teacher has ever commented to

us on this).

Again, thanks so much for your input.

Anne

---------------------------------

Pinpoint customers who are looking for what you sell.

[Guest guest]

Anne,

The advice on her has been wonderful. Here are some more thoughts

for you to ponder. I believe that an IEP will get you more help than

a 504. In my opinion a 504 will not spell out all the adaptations

your child may need.

Is there a special ed coordinator for your school district? If so, I

would go to that person and show your IEP from last year and explain

all that you have done to try and get a meeting. There should be

someone responsible for seeing that the IEP is followed. I agree with

the person that told you to log everything. Unfortunately, you may

end up in due process and you will need that information. While it

may feel like you are being a neurotic mom, you need to remember that

you are doing this to help your child. As in every profession, there

are good and bad teachers. Sometimes the regular ed teachers feel

completely overwhelmed because they have to deal with this child who

has OCD and this child who comes from a bad home life, etc....

Trying to show the teacher that you are more than willing to help

your child and ask for suggestions may work but don't forget you have

the rights to go further if you are not getting answers. When you

have an IEP do they send you a Procedural Safeguards sheet. It

should explain all your rights and where you can go in your state if

you feel things are not being followed. Our district can sometimes

frown on outside evaluations but it sounds as if your person is

willing to work with the school. Perhaps asking the counselor that

seems to be listening to you to sit down with you and your outside

psychologist may be a good place to start.

Deb

[Guest guest]

Anne,

The advice on her has been wonderful. Here are some more thoughts

for you to ponder. I believe that an IEP will get you more help than

a 504. In my opinion a 504 will not spell out all the adaptations

your child may need.

Is there a special ed coordinator for your school district? If so, I

would go to that person and show your IEP from last year and explain

all that you have done to try and get a meeting. There should be

someone responsible for seeing that the IEP is followed. I agree with

the person that told you to log everything. Unfortunately, you may

end up in due process and you will need that information. While it

may feel like you are being a neurotic mom, you need to remember that

you are doing this to help your child. As in every profession, there

are good and bad teachers. Sometimes the regular ed teachers feel

completely overwhelmed because they have to deal with this child who

has OCD and this child who comes from a bad home life, etc....

Trying to show the teacher that you are more than willing to help

your child and ask for suggestions may work but don't forget you have

the rights to go further if you are not getting answers. When you

have an IEP do they send you a Procedural Safeguards sheet. It

should explain all your rights and where you can go in your state if

you feel things are not being followed. Our district can sometimes

frown on outside evaluations but it sounds as if your person is

willing to work with the school. Perhaps asking the counselor that

seems to be listening to you to sit down with you and your outside

psychologist may be a good place to start.

Deb

[Guest guest]

Hi Anne,

You said you feel your dd fell behind in grammar and spelling while

in the resource room 1st and 2nd grades. I would bring this up at

the IEP meeting. Apparently she goes to the resource room still for

math? Does she have something other than OCD, some learning

disability?

The reason I ask is that if some subjects are just harder for her,

then the school may just suggest you help her at home. Or if she

happens to have really good teachers (doesn't sound like it) they

might offer to help her after school or her coming to school earlier

so they can help. Unless they do have some tutoring program. This

is what would happen with any non-OCD/average/typical student in the

school who is struggling in subjects. Like some students may find

science and math easy but struggle with reading or vice-versa. So

parents have to help at home, hire tutors, ask school if they have

tutoring or something for kids.... But if she's got an LD also that

causes this " struggling " , then this is something that you might be

able to get her some special ed services for...maybe. If she's

falling behind because OCD is distracting or causing issues with her

doing the work, then that would be in the IEP. It's just from what

you wrote, I'm not sure if her problems being behind are due to

any " disability " so the school may not want to address this in her

IEP.

Her talking too much -- sounds like this may be an issue where she's

just a talkative person. I had a son like that! Some teachers work

better with students like this, some don't. But my talking to him

about it, the teachers talking to him about it and finding that

praising him for things (when he was quiet and doing his work or in

his seat, etc.) helped. One teacher was fine with students talking

so long as they whispered and weren't disturbing others, keeping

others from working. Teachers are just so different with strictness,

etc. I really had to stay on my oldest son about talking in class,

socializing.

Now - how GREAT that your dd actually talked to the counselor about

her worrying!!! Sounds like she's good at advocating for herself,

that is, she will let others know when she is having problems! So -

maybe her worries are causing some of the issues at school. This

should be addressed in the IEP, how it's affecting her ability to do

work, is she talking to distract herself from her worries, can she

leave the room to go to a safe place (counselor?) if worries are

bothering her a lot, can she take home unfinished work.... And

asking the teachers at the IEP meeting (ahem, sounds like they are NO

help) what they've done in the past with students, asking for their

input first BEFORE giving your suggestions that might help, this can

help stop some teachers from feeling " dictated " to about how to teach

their class, handle students, etc.

Just some quick thoughts. As I can see how the school might put some

of this off as not falling under her IEP if it's not a problem due to

any disability.

>

> Hi all,

>

> After I received such great advice several weeks ago...I am

following

> up again here. My DD is 8 years old and in 3rd grade. She has

been

[Guest guest]

Hi Anne,

You said you feel your dd fell behind in grammar and spelling while

in the resource room 1st and 2nd grades. I would bring this up at

the IEP meeting. Apparently she goes to the resource room still for

math? Does she have something other than OCD, some learning

disability?

The reason I ask is that if some subjects are just harder for her,

then the school may just suggest you help her at home. Or if she

happens to have really good teachers (doesn't sound like it) they

might offer to help her after school or her coming to school earlier

so they can help. Unless they do have some tutoring program. This

is what would happen with any non-OCD/average/typical student in the

school who is struggling in subjects. Like some students may find

science and math easy but struggle with reading or vice-versa. So

parents have to help at home, hire tutors, ask school if they have

tutoring or something for kids.... But if she's got an LD also that

causes this " struggling " , then this is something that you might be

able to get her some special ed services for...maybe. If she's

falling behind because OCD is distracting or causing issues with her

doing the work, then that would be in the IEP. It's just from what

you wrote, I'm not sure if her problems being behind are due to

any " disability " so the school may not want to address this in her

IEP.

Her talking too much -- sounds like this may be an issue where she's

just a talkative person. I had a son like that! Some teachers work

better with students like this, some don't. But my talking to him

about it, the teachers talking to him about it and finding that

praising him for things (when he was quiet and doing his work or in

his seat, etc.) helped. One teacher was fine with students talking

so long as they whispered and weren't disturbing others, keeping

others from working. Teachers are just so different with strictness,

etc. I really had to stay on my oldest son about talking in class,

socializing.

Now - how GREAT that your dd actually talked to the counselor about

her worrying!!! Sounds like she's good at advocating for herself,

that is, she will let others know when she is having problems! So -

maybe her worries are causing some of the issues at school. This

should be addressed in the IEP, how it's affecting her ability to do

work, is she talking to distract herself from her worries, can she

leave the room to go to a safe place (counselor?) if worries are

bothering her a lot, can she take home unfinished work.... And

asking the teachers at the IEP meeting (ahem, sounds like they are NO

help) what they've done in the past with students, asking for their

input first BEFORE giving your suggestions that might help, this can

help stop some teachers from feeling " dictated " to about how to teach

their class, handle students, etc.

Just some quick thoughts. As I can see how the school might put some

of this off as not falling under her IEP if it's not a problem due to

any disability.

>

> Hi all,

>

> After I received such great advice several weeks ago...I am

following

> up again here. My DD is 8 years old and in 3rd grade. She has

been