Guest guest Posted October 20, 2010 Report Share Posted October 20, 2010 hi i am new at this but i need advice and hopefully someone can help. i have a 10 yr old son with asbergers and i am trying to get behavior issues like name callin and hitting and sometimes he will pick at self or objects. i was just looking for advice on how to use appropriate disipline with him when he does wrong. the school says reward him but he has caught on and smart boy lol acts ok till he gets it then acts oout again to me hes gotta learn without receiving a reward for everytime he acts good . i mean i praise him but now he expects it thanks for any advice dawn Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 20, 2010 Report Share Posted October 20, 2010 My Peds Dr. has gotten my High Function ASD child in Behavior Therpy. Can I say it helps. No I can't because it don't help but my child is different. She is 24-7 total care. Non verbal. So with her begin non verbal it complicates things. But it might be a start in the right direction. It don't hurt to at least try it. Becky behavior hi i am new at this but i need advice and hopefully someone can help. i have a 10 yr old son with asbergers and i am trying to get behavior issues like name callin and hitting and sometimes he will pick at self or objects. i was just looking for advice on how to use appropriate disipline with him when he does wrong. the school says reward him but he has caught on and smart boy lol acts ok till he gets it then acts oout again to me hes gotta learn without receiving a reward for everytime he acts good . i mean i praise him but now he expects it thanks for any advice dawn Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 21, 2010 Report Share Posted October 21, 2010 you are very welcome! I hope it works for you, the biggest thing is consistency . But you can do it! You are strong, dont ever let anyone tell you different. Since my son was diagnosed, Helping others with similar problems w Autism and related. is my self therapy! I actually got this from a conference I went to , about how to handle your hard to handle child. and it was about Special needs children BowersProud Parent of an Autistic Son! I love my family and my Kids are my world! I do work outside the home, but my Heart is at home! austyn0518@...kaylaa0518@... sburg WVFrom: Dawn Lennox <lennoxdawn@...>Autism and Aspergers Treatment Sent: Wed, October 20, 2010 5:25:43 PMSubject: Re: behavior i thank u so much for the help and i will try this and see how he does thanks again ________________________________From: Bowers <austyn0518@...>Autism and Aspergers Treatment Sent: Wed, October 20, 2010 10:37:01 AMSubject: Re: behavior Spread out the reward, make it to where if he acts good for 30 min. he gets the reward. then if that works for a wk... go to every hr. and eventually you will be able to say, if you can be good, and be a gentlman for the whole day, you will get this extra thing. I know it seems crazy....but take baby steps til you get to where you give it 2 times a day, or 1 time a day. it will take time... like mo. or 2. but try it! BowersProud Parent of an Autistic Son! I love my family and my Kids are my world! I do work outside the home, but my Heart is at home! austyn0518@...kaylaa0518@... sburg WV________________________________From: "beckystewart2962@..." <beckystewart2962@...>Autism and Aspergers Treatment Sent: Wed, October 20, 2010 2:54:02 AMSubject: Re: behavior My Peds Dr. has gotten my High Function ASD child in Behavior Therpy. Can I say it helps. No I can't because it don't help but my child is different. She is 24-7 total care. Non verbal. So with her begin non verbal it complicates things. But it might be a start in the right direction. It don't hurt to at least try it.Becky behaviorhi i am new at this but i need advice and hopefully someone can help. i have a 10 yr old son with asbergers and i am trying to get behavior issues like name callin and hitting and sometimes he will pick at self or objects. i was just looking for advice on how to use appropriate disipline with him when he does wrong. the school says reward him but he has caught on and smart boy lol acts ok till he gets it then acts oout again to me hes gotta learn without receiving a reward for everytime he acts good . i mean i praise him but now he expects itthanks for any advicedawn Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 22, 2010 Report Share Posted October 22, 2010 Dear Dawn, I'm not sure what kind of rewards you give him or how often. They may be too obvious, for he would notice not getting them. Usually gradual decreases in rewarding is best. Example might be from every day to 3 out of 4 days to 2 out of 3 days in a row. Take advantage when his mind focuses on other things and not asking or expecting reward to him. Stopping it totally at one time may be too obvious to him. Take advantage of times he doesn't ask. Sometimes giving affection(hugs, high-fives, handshakes, compliments, maybe kisses, etc.) can be effective confidence boosters to children instead of rewards. Use variety in rewarding so it's not always same every time. From there, negotiate on which award before he attempts to do good. You can say "no" anytime prior so he knows doing something good will not benefit. All the best. Tom, 38(seizures and Asperger's) From: LOVING PARENT <lennoxdawn@...>Subject: behaviorAutism and Aspergers Treatment Date: Tuesday, October 19, 2010, 6:31 PM hi i am new at this but i need advice and hopefully someone can help. i have a 10 yr old son with asbergers and i am trying to get behavior issues like name callin and hitting and sometimes he will pick at self or objects. i was just looking for advice on how to use appropriate disipline with him when he does wrong. the school says reward him but he has caught on and smart boy lol acts ok till he gets it then acts oout again to me hes gotta learn without receiving a reward for everytime he acts good . i mean i praise him but now he expects it thanks for any advicedawn Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 23, 2010 Report Share Posted October 23, 2010 Praise has worked for us as well. We use poker chips. The pack has red, green, blue and black. When he goes to bed without any issues, he gets a red the next morning. When he gets up and gets ready for school without any problems, and eats all his breakfast, he gets a green (notice red –stop, green – go). Then, for extra positive behavior, for helping out around the house or for trying new foods (has really helped!), he gets a blue chip. And for unbelievable GREAT behavior he gets a black – the highest chip, and sees that there are Not that many of them. This being said, it has worked great. He gets to put them into a big red cup with his name on it, and is almost to the top. Once there, he gets the reward we decided on. This first will probably be the biggest, a violin, and then we’ll lower it form there. Also, over the past couple of months, he has moved into going to bed and getting up well, and has slowly moved away from the chips, unless he asks, and then I give it to him, since that was our agreement. But I still hold firm on the blue and black chips. He gets to see what hard work and good behavior does as the chips “He Earns” fill the cup on the counter. And quite frankly, ever since doing this cup chip system, his behavior has gotten tremendously better. I think he is so concerned about filling it with good behavior, that his poor behavior and hitting us has somewhat gone to the wayside, unless he is having a very bad day. Also, when his behavior is bad, then he looses a blue chip. I try to make this very rare. And that makes him angry and crushes him. In addition, by doing it this way, he gets rewarded immediately, but it is not a reward that he can “play” with or whatever. It’s not like you’re getting him a hot wheel or something each day, and once he gets it he has poor behavior again. By doing it this way, he has to work for his “real” reward, and it has to build up, so it helps to make his good behavior “prolonged” and not shortlived. It takes days to earn a physical reward. Hold firm, and you may find that good things will prevail! Good luck, Jaelene On 10/22/10 4:53 PM, " Tom H. " <tomthetwin@...> wrote: Dear Dawn, I'm not sure what kind of rewards you give him or how often. They may be too obvious, for he would notice not getting them. Usually gradual decreases in rewarding is best. Example might be from every day to 3 out of 4 days to 2 out of 3 days in a row. Take advantage when his mind focuses on other things and not asking or expecting reward to him. Stopping it totally at one time may be too obvious to him. Take advantage of times he doesn't ask. Sometimes giving affection(hugs, high-fives, handshakes, compliments, maybe kisses, etc.) can be effective confidence boosters to children instead of rewards. Use variety in rewarding so it's not always same every time. From there, negotiate on which award before he attempts to do good. You can say " no " anytime prior so he knows doing something good will not benefit. All the best. Tom, 38(seizures and Asperger's) From: LOVING PARENT <lennoxdawn@...> Subject: behavior Autism and Aspergers Treatment Date: Tuesday, October 19, 2010, 6:31 PM hi i am new at this but i need advice and hopefully someone can help. i have a 10 yr old son with asbergers and i am trying to get behavior issues like name callin and hitting and sometimes he will pick at self or objects. i was just looking for advice on how to use appropriate disipline with him when he does wrong. the school says reward him but he has caught on and smart boy lol acts ok till he gets it then acts oout again to me hes gotta learn without receiving a reward for everytime he acts good . i mean i praise him but now he expects it thanks for any advice dawn Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 24, 2010 Report Share Posted October 24, 2010 Jaelene....your poker chip reward system interests me and I'd like to give it a try with my daughter. How old is your son? ~ From: Jaelene <jmbrooks@...>Autism and Aspergers Treatment Sent: Sat, October 23, 2010 3:47:58 PMSubject: Re: behavior Praise has worked for us as well. We use poker chips. The pack has red, green, blue and black. When he goes to bed without any issues, he gets a red the next morning. When he gets up and gets ready for school without any problems, and eats all his breakfast, he gets a green (notice red –stop, green – go). Then, for extra positive behavior, for helping out around the house or for trying new foods (has really helped!), he gets a blue chip. And for unbelievable GREAT behavior he gets a black – the highest chip, and sees that there are Not that many of them. This being said, it has worked great. He gets to put them into a big red cup with his name on it, and is almost to the top. Once there, he gets the reward we decided on. This first will probably be the biggest, a violin, and then we’ll lower it form there. Also, over the past couple of months, he has moved into going to bed and getting up well, and has slowly moved away from the chips, unless he asks, and then I give it to him, since that was our agreement. But I still hold firm on the blue and black chips. He gets to see what hard work and good behavior does as the chips “He Earns†fill the cup on the counter. And quite frankly, ever since doing this cup chip system, his behavior has gotten tremendously better. I think he is so concerned about filling it with good behavior, that his poor behavior and hitting us has somewhat gone to the wayside, unless he is having a very bad day. Also, when his behavior is bad, then he looses a blue chip. I try to make this very rare. And that makes him angry and crushes him. In addition, by doing it this way, he gets rewarded immediately, but it is not a reward that he can “play†with or whatever. It’s not like you’re getting him a hot wheel or something each day, and once he gets it he has poor behavior again. By doing it this way, he has to work for his “real†reward, and it has to build up, so it helps to make his good behavior “prolonged†and not shortlived. It takes days to earn a physical reward. Hold firm, and you may find that good things will prevail! Good luck,JaeleneOn 10/22/10 4:53 PM, "Tom H." <tomthetwin@...> wrote: Dear Dawn,I'm not sure what kind of rewards you give him or how often. They may be too obvious, for he would notice not getting them. Usually gradual decreases in rewarding is best. Example might be from every day to 3 out of 4 days to 2 out of 3 days in a row. Take advantage when his mind focuses on other things and not asking or expecting reward to him. Stopping it totally at one time may be too obvious to him.Take advantage of times he doesn't ask. Sometimes giving affection(hugs, high-fives, handshakes, compliments, maybe kisses, etc.) can be effective confidence boosters to children instead of rewards.Use variety in rewarding so it's not always same every time. From there, negotiate on which award before he attempts to do good. You can say "no" anytime prior so he knows doing something good will not benefit.All the best. Tom, 38(seizures and Asperger's) From: LOVING PARENT <lennoxdawn@...>Subject: behaviorAutism and Aspergers Treatment Date: Tuesday, October 19, 2010, 6:31 PM hi i am new at this but i need advice and hopefully someone can help. i have a 10 yr old son with asbergers and i am trying to get behavior issues like name callin and hitting and sometimes he will pick at self or objects. i was just looking for advice on how to use appropriate disipline with him when he does wrong. the school says reward him but he has caught on and smart boy lol acts ok till he gets it then acts oout again to me hes gotta learn without receiving a reward for everytime he acts good . i mean i praise him but now he expects it thanks for any advicedawn Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 25, 2010 Report Share Posted October 25, 2010 He is five. It has worked great to not only curb his fits, and hitting of us, but it has also helped get him to sleep alone in his own bed and room, as well as just plain old feel great about himself. He sees the rewards building. They are short term, but then also long term and we have held out. Good luck! Let me know if you have any questions- Jaelene On 10/24/10 12:10 PM, " Fleury " <fleury.kelly@...> wrote: Jaelene....your poker chip reward system interests me and I'd like to give it a try with my daughter. How old is your son? ~ <http://kellyfleury.yourpassionconsultant.com/> From: Jaelene <jmbrooks@...> Autism and Aspergers Treatment Sent: Sat, October 23, 2010 3:47:58 PM Subject: Re: behavior Praise has worked for us as well. We use poker chips. The pack has red, green, blue and black. When he goes to bed without any issues, he gets a red the next morning. When he gets up and gets ready for school without any problems, and eats all his breakfast, he gets a green (notice red –stop, green – go). Then, for extra positive behavior, for helping out around the house or for trying new foods (has really helped!), he gets a blue chip. And for unbelievable GREAT behavior he gets a black – the highest chip, and sees that there are Not that many of them. This being said, it has worked great. He gets to put them into a big red cup with his name on it, and is almost to the top. Once there, he gets the reward we decided on. This first will probably be the biggest, a violin, and then we’ll lower it form there. Also, over the past couple of months, he has moved into going to bed and getting up well, and has slowly moved away from the chips, unless he asks, and then I give it to him, since that was our agreement. But I still hold firm on the blue and black chips. He gets to see what hard work and good behavior does as the chips “He Earns” fill the cup on the counter. And quite frankly, ever since doing this cup chip system, his behavior has gotten tremendously better. I think he is so concerned about filling it with good behavior, that his poor behavior and hitting us has somewhat gone to the wayside, unless he is having a very bad day. Also, when his behavior is bad, then he looses a blue chip. I try to make this very rare. And that makes him angry and crushes him. In addition, by doing it this way, he gets rewarded immediately, but it is not a reward that he can “play” with or whatever. It’s not like you’re getting him a hot wheel or something each day, and once he gets it he has poor behavior again. By doing it this way, he has to work for his “real” reward, and it has to build up, so it helps to make his good behavior “prolonged” and not shortlived. It takes days to earn a physical reward. Hold firm, and you may find that good things will prevail! Good luck, Jaelene On 10/22/10 4:53 PM, " Tom H. " <tomthetwin@...> wrote: Dear Dawn, I'm not sure what kind of rewards you give him or how often. They may be too obvious, for he would notice not getting them. Usually gradual decreases in rewarding is best. Example might be from every day to 3 out of 4 days to 2 out of 3 days in a row. Take advantage when his mind focuses on other things and not asking or expecting reward to him. Stopping it totally at one time may be too obvious to him. Take advantage of times he doesn't ask. Sometimes giving affection(hugs, high-fives, handshakes, compliments, maybe kisses, etc.) can be effective confidence boosters to children instead of rewards. Use variety in rewarding so it's not always same every time. From there, negotiate on which award before he attempts to do good. You can say " no " anytime prior so he knows doing something good will not benefit. All the best. Tom, 38(seizures and Asperger's) From: LOVING PARENT <lennoxdawn@...> Subject: behavior Autism and Aspergers Treatment Date: Tuesday, October 19, 2010, 6:31 PM hi i am new at this but i need advice and hopefully someone can help. i have a 10 yr old son with asbergers and i am trying to get behavior issues like name callin and hitting and sometimes he will pick at self or objects. i was just looking for advice on how to use appropriate disipline with him when he does wrong. the school says reward him but he has caught on and smart boy lol acts ok till he gets it then acts oout again to me hes gotta learn without receiving a reward for everytime he acts good . i mean i praise him but now he expects it thanks for any advice dawn Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 25, 2010 Report Share Posted October 25, 2010 They use a behavior contract in my son's classroom. It works really well for him in a variety of situations even at home. I actually came across a short You Tube presentation on it yesterday. > >>> > >>> From: LOVING PARENT <lennoxdawn@...> > >>> Subject: behavior > >>> Autism and Aspergers Treatment > >>> Date: Tuesday, October 19, 2010, 6:31 PM > >>> > >>> hi i am new at this but i need advice and hopefully someone can help. i > >>> have a 10 yr old son with asbergers and i am trying to get behavior issues > >>> like name callin and hitting and sometimes he will pick at self or objects. > >>> i was just looking for advice on how to use appropriate disipline with him > >>> when he does wrong. the school says reward him but he has caught on and > >>> smart boy lol acts ok till he gets it then acts oout again to me hes gotta > >>> learn without receiving a reward for everytime he acts good . i mean i > >>> praise him but now he expects it > >>> thanks for any advice > >>> dawn > >>> > >> > >> > >> > >> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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