to Martijn/ Re: advice please - meltdown prevention

[Guest guest]

There is a shared or collective mind Martijn. We just ignore it most of the time, being self-concerned. And this is really giving me a wonderful suggestion to tune in to what others (with or w/o autism) are thinking/feeling.

It's not so hard to get a sense of that when we're off ourselves.

Francine

p.s. whatever the software is sounds cool.

Speak with Him Thou for He hearest.

Spirit with Spirit can speak.

Closer is Love than breathing,

Nearer than hands and feet.

(with appreciation for Tennyson)

Re: advice please - meltdown prevention

Hi,

(I've cut some of this excellent post)

> That said, the name of the game is MELTDOWN PREVENTION.

>

> Some of the stories that people frequently tell themselves are, "It is horrible when things don't happen the way I expect them to happen", "I am afraid when things don't happen the way I expect them to happen", "We all share the same mind and other people automatically know what I expect to happen". That last one is a biggie as autistic people frequently operate as though there is a collective mind with shared information. This is one of the communication issues; they don't think there is anything to communicate. A lot of neurotypical people have these stories, they don't meltdown to the extent as a person on the spectrum because of nervous system differences. It's a double whammy: having a nervous system that doesn't flow smoothly PLUS having emotionally unhealthy stories or beliefs.

>

It is not only a story people tell them themselves. When our son is used to a certain way it does cost him less time if this always is done the same way. It gives clearity and he can precess a situation quicker. That why he (and most autistic people) don't like changes, and often the details are very important. Changing details add's too the likelyhood of a meltdown.

So it helps a great deal to 'build in' the chance of changes. Or for instance when we are at the church we told our son that the preacher is boss during the service. And that the preacher decides what happens. It helps him in accepting changes.

But we also created a visal that clearly shows all the steps that are involved in a service. And when things go differently we can explain those changes by using this visual.

>

> You might create some tasks cards for "things to do when things don't go the way I expected", or "how to get help when things don't go the way I expected", "how to get help when someone talks/acts the way I don't expect", "getting out of the door with grace and dignity", etc. Comparison cards: "my expectation vs. his/her/your expectation" are also interesting.

>

Maybe Picto Selector can help in creating the visuals. It contains different symbols styles (black / white - more abstract / adult suited pictures and colorfull ones) You can also use text for describing situations.

Picto Selector can be freely downloaded from www.PECSforAll.com

Martijn