An Introduction

[Guest guest]

Hi,

My name is Pasha (nickname of Johannes M. Clouser)

I am a 46 year old man and have just been told I have Asperger's Syndrome. It has explained a lot about my life. And I mean alot!

I decided to join this Group to learn whatever I can from Y'all. A Lady I know asked me how I came to be diagnosed at this age and I answered her with a letter that I think introduces me well, so I'm pasting it here below. The one thing you need to know first is that they didn't have Asperger's in the 60s, so my father tried to beat the weirdness out of me with a leather strap. He left us when I was only 8 and I was happy to see him go.

>What led you to getting a diagnosis at this age?

I have been in therapy for quite some time for Agoraphobia and OCD. I was also afraid of Dogs because in 1983 I was attacked and wounded by two Pit Bulls that had been trained (mis-trained) for fighting.

Part of my therapy was working with Therapy Dogs and that eventually led to my doing the Dog Rescues for Jen. There is just enough Human socializing for me to get some practice without being overwhelmed and the presence of the Animals seems to calm me down.

These past few weeks we were testing to see if I have Adult Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder because of not sleeping well and not being able to focus enough on my studies, and the questionnaire led them to suspect Asperger's Syndrome (or possibly one of the other high-function disorders). So I filled out more questionnaires and it's a done deal.

My Cousin told me that my Aunt had Asperger's as well. It's funny because as a kid I always liked to hang out with that particular Aunt. BTW, I do have the Adult ADHD and they put me on Adderall. It's working really well, and the full effect is just starting to take place.

I'm afraid I can't claim to be a success, I've been out of work more than I've been in. I now can only work for myself, not work for someone else because of Agoraphobia and the fact that I don't pick up on subtle social cues.

But, I am Married, "I'm a good driver, a very good driver," and I like to think I'm compassionate towards others. Right now I am taking a break and working on some at-home studies on German, Latin, and English language. I am enrolled in the local Community College and have been working off and on to get my my Degree. I started that in 2000 and was doing very well -- they invited me to join a special Club for People with near perfect grades -- then in 2001 September 11th happened and I did a tailspin. I couldn't study, I couldn't retain what I learned, it was horrible. I very nearly flunked pre-calculus which is funny because all you have to do is use the graphing calculator to answer the questions for you. I'm still working on getting over all of that.

This was the first year that I didn't let myself listen to the naming of the Names at Ground Zero. It was hard for me not to, but I really think I should let go of that. It doesn't help much that two of my nephews are in the Marine Corps. On September 30th one of them, k, is shipping out for Iraq for a year and a half -- depending on what the next President does. This is k's second deployment there. I explained to him that I am against the war in Iraq but I am absolutely behind him and all the Troops that are out there doing their job. In case you are curios, I am for the war in Afghanistan, I just think we ought to do a Surge there and root out the terrorists in Pakistan. I don't care what the Pakistani idea of a government has to say about it. They should have done the job long ago. Sorry, no more Politics.

Another way in which my life has gone is that I am a Pagan, specifically a Wiccan, or Witch if you prefer. I worship a Goddess rather than a God. That might be connected to my father. I left the Catholic Church in part because I didn't like the Male Hierarchy and to this day I am leery of Men. Though I'm getting better at that since becoming an older Man myself. (My long red hair was turning gray -- so I had them dye it Platinum Blonde!) So apparently people with Asperger's can be vain about their appearance, lol.

Anyway, I think Brody will fare much better than me because he's got you on his side. You recognize his situation and you're dealing with it. That is Great. I believe he'll be just fine.

Bright Blessings, Pasha

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